Jack Monroe #524 Not the only or most important voice and presence in this critical area of our life

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As a newbie, I just did a quick personal inventory to double check I'm not Jack

Patreon begs ZERO
Twitter accounts ZERO
Sideboards ZERO
Toasters ZERO
CCJs ZERO
Engagement rings ZERO
Grey pov jumper ZERO
But do you have three freezers?
 
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Don't worry. She has a stab jacket/bulletproof vest espesh for festis. And she always has the option to do a no-show - organisers are accustomed to that from her.
 
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'My weird little head'

Also, that sauce is dry as fuck.

She is so bloody rude it's untrue and that's a theme for the whole two weeks. She really is appalling on TV.
 
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But do you have three freezers?
Oh dammit... busted...

But wait! Quick rummage around my 1 bed 1 level flat with no garden, no sheds, no secret upstairs compartments, reveals ZERO freezers.
Apart from the tiny little bit for putting ice cubes and one bag of peas and one tub of ice cream in the top of the fridge.

Phew! I can sleep tonight safe in the knowledge I'm not having a chaos and not everyone hates me.
 
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Galton Blackiston,Jason Atherton and Theo Randall always look like they would take no prisoners in a kitchen environment.
It can't be Michel Roux because he tweeted in support of her.
I really don’t think James Martin is a fan at all - he posted that thing about karma on his Instagram when Awfully Molly’s blog came out (very unlike him, he normally just posts about food, dogs or cars). Also, I think Tom Kerridge saw the light last year. But I don’t think they are Saturday Kitchen regulars.
I wonder what Allegra thinks these days. She’s a good mate of Matt too isn’t she?
 
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'My weird little head'

Also, that sauce is dry as fuck.

She is so bloody rude it's untrue and that's a theme for the whole two weeks. She really is appalling on TV.
There was an ongoing dispute on DKL between guest and Sir Forearms, involving real lemons v Jif lemon juice - guest made several niggles about it, and at one point was on a monitor in the background throwing and catching a lemon while Forearms was presenting/talking to another cook. It was so distracting, so unprofessional, so immature, so on-brand for guest. I'm scarlet for you, hun (guest).
 
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Has anyone actually tried the horse spunk white sauce recipe, followed exactly as demonstrated/described by guest? Did it thicken up as both guest and Matt of the Forearms claimed it would on live teevee for the entire nation to see?
 
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But it's a dress for children! It's *cute*
 
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My dinnertime entertainment this evening was grunking the entirety of ~infamous Thread 31~ and honestly, if Jack Monroe Playbook 101 was a course (it isn't, Jack, don't go adding that one to the ol' CV) then that thread would be THE teaching resource. It has everything:

- spurious libel accusation and vague threat of legal action
- infantilising herself ('my sad little face' was a highlight)
- ramping up the idea that she is under more security threat than a prisoner of war
- complete and total refusal to take any responsibility for anything
- blaming everything on The Bad Mentals or Her Past and placing responsibility for these things on others who've nothing to do with them
- only responding to the more negative comments and ignoring the people showing genuine concern or giving genuine advice
- not responding to perfectly fair questions re. things like furlough, why she doesn't have admin support if social media is bad for her MH
- tarring the entirety of Tattle as a Big Bad Entity with Evil Trolls when it's nowhere near that black-and-white
- a healthy side of being rude, snide, guilt-tripping and talking down to everybody

I've always noted how snippy she is with everybody who doesn't express gushing admiration towards her; even people asking questions in good faith get shot down and made out to be extreme detractors when they're not, and that thread just confirmed that further. A little side course in PR alongside the much-needed media training would be beneficial (though neither will happen, of course).
 
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Not sure as that could be absolutely anyone from that clue, but these would be my favourite choices...
Nisha Katona
Angela Hartnett
Olia Hercules (not sure she is 'restaurant ')
Paul Ainsworth
And of course....TOM KERRIDGE
Oh yes, remember “over to you, Paul” on DKL. Matt had asked Jack some question about budget cooking ingredients I think (that was supposedly why she was there, after all) and she just batted it onto Paul Ainsworth, who was a guest. His face was a picture. God she was utterly abysmal.
Also, remember when they had Adam Frost (from Gardeners World etc.) on talking about growing your own veg - and Jack said something incredibly patronising like “you’re getting used to this television lark, aren’t you”. For context, Adam has considerably more TV experience than Jack.
She was just so so terrible on DKL.
 
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I think they're intended for lesbian transgender non binary men, such as herself.
Excuse me tender one but she’s a BOY.




Except for when there’s a super cool edgy tshirt to be worn.

 
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OMG I missed that, the arrogant cow.

I love Adam Frost with a love that is pure - I will defend him to the death and am henceforth Frosty Defender.
 
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Is her Twitter account locked like a chastity belt until after her next two outings (is there anything else in the pipeline after Greenbelt & Edinburgh?) Will there be the most glorious chaos afterwards when she’s given her password back? (Sorry if this has already been much discussed & forensically dissected but I’ve not been in the right headspace recently to stay the pace of Tattle so took myself off for a bit! Lovely to be back & how brilliant to see some new faces, especially Molly who definitely took a bullet for the team over on the hellsite!)
 
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The situation back then was so very different to what it is/what we’ve uncovered since so be kind to yourself babes. We weren’t even fully aware of the scale of the grift and certainly not the Patreon page by that point, don’t think the work had been put in on way back machine or archive sites yet, we were somewhat oblivious to just what a piece of shit she is. Our biggest class cosplay gotcha was the blue Land Rover to someone’s country house rather than the £1.8mil estate left by grandad and dad’s multi property portfolio and 5 bed house. Our understanding of the situation now has taken hundreds of hours worth of work and documentation (between here and Twitter and beyond, I assume) from hundreds and hundreds of individual contributors.

Weird times atm tho.
 
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It's funny.
You want a chaos but then if it's a hilarious one and it's bad timing as you are working you end up trying to not look like you have a UTI because you're visiting the loo so often to catch up.

I'm half dreading a chaos, struggling to keep up as it is...

 
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Has anyone actually tried the horse spunk white sauce recipe, followed exactly as demonstrated/described by guest? Did it thicken up as both guest and Matt of the Forearms claimed it would on live teevee for the entire nation to see?
Yes, me For the slopathon which is why I know it doesn’t work. In the actual recipe, she does tell you to make a white sauce but she forgot//WFK on DKL and tried to style it out. So I decided to be faithful as the programme was supposed to be super helpful to people in lockdown
 
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As does the ‘you can use stuffing’ on top of the lasagne. How this moron ever got a career in food is mind blowing. She’s so unsettling to watch & rude-the ‘where’s a spoon’ bit too. If I’d been on set I’d have chucked a big metal one at her.
 
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Has anyone actually tried the horse spunk white sauce recipe, followed exactly as demonstrated/described by guest? Did it thicken up as both guest and Matt of the Forearms claimed it would on live teevee for the entire nation to see?
I suspect not, as the BBC corrected the recipe when it went on their website. Embarrassing!
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I think thread 31 was also pre-kitten. That was certainly a turning point for me.
 
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