Jack Monroe #476 Avec Dangereux Dave and Les Pantalons of Beaucoup Grandes Humiliations

[stunrw]

Depending on how many neighbours she has, think of all the accidental cock she could get as a practicing lesbian……

 

[NellieBoo]

Oh I have that to come ,pun intended
I went for a bottomless brunch yesterday. If chugging as many cocktails as you can manage in 90 minutes whilst eating quite honestly shit food was a sport. I don't wanna brag but I would do pretty well

Good girl

 

[heretoreaditall2019]

Get ur print screens

 

[here we go again]

Got given a slice of cake today. The fondant polka dot is suspiciously Spam coloured...wondering if it was made to a Jack Monroe recipe.

 

[L3moning]

All this talk of "the underbelly" reminds me of the Green Day song Homecoming, from the album American Idiot. Specifically¹ "he'd rather be doing something else now / like cigarettes and coffee with the underbelly / his life's on the line with anxiety now / he's had enough and she's had plenty".

¹the whole song is over 9 minutes long and bits of it deal with suicide and are a bit grim, but it does end on a hopeful note, and the suicide is probably not literal.

 

[Phillipa78]

If she moves this week, assuming she's been served notice of the small claims claim, will the inevitable ccj have her new address on as I'm guessing that only gets issued once she refuses to pay the small claims court thing? For someone so set on her privacy, you'd think that would make avoiding a ccj come pretty near the top of her priority list.

This might be the most unintelligible thing she's done... I truly think she believes herself to be above the law due to her grandiosity. But then she knows what the consequences are and moans about them. I find this completely mind-boggling and I can't imagine what kind of warped logic runs under it.

 

[DoritoTamales]

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"I've not lost yet" is a bit of a strong statement when you've only taken one person to court, no?

It's like portraying yourself as a Grand Chessmaster because the single game you've played, you won.

…and you were playing against Mrs Tumble.

 

[TillyMiffin]

I’m 38 (or 37, or 39, WFK?) and I’m not even going to bother trying to identify any of them. It’ll only depress me. Watching ‘the Great British Menu’ with a blanket over my knees instead.

Im 53, watched it with my teen daughters and I knew more artists than them! Lizzo, Harry Styles, Sam Smith & Lewis Capaldi all did ace performances. Don’t like Wet Leg or The 1975 though.

 

[Hollaaa]

How the actual does a dog save you money?

Not just any dog. The dog.

 

[Foxvint]

Why is one so big? Did she buy one for someone else and herself too and demand it back?

I thought for a second the 1 on her little finger had made it go blue like something out the arcade but it's just 1 of the shit tattoos. They're all a bit dubious aren't they.

 

[stunrw]

in and out in and out

I gather thats how she likes it……..

 

[Raydog]

When she says she doesn’t have to pay her friends I think she means she can’t even pay people to get real mates -big difference pal ! Huge difference !

 

[PeepholePringle]

I’m rough as fuck this morning so I’m hoping it’s a full day snarkfest.

On Cinema GIF on a Jack Monroe thread? Day/Week/Year made!

 

[Hold my beans]

Has she ever said what type of therapists these bff's are? I know she has them on speed dial and bothers them all hours of the day and night and of course they're probably not real anyway but wfk

 

[Marmalade Atkins]

I can’t see her tweets, can anyone else?

Yes. Jack's account is open and everything looks normal.

 

[Raker]

I have seen the Reynolds girls. And the London Boys. Stock Aitken and Waterman were god's to me when I was younger.

The Nostradamus(s) of the late 80s, behold:
AM (awfully Molly)
FM (flying monkeys)
All that jizz jazz (horse spunk sauce)
We’d rather sing along with boulevaaaard Yazz

 

[Archduchess of Luxembourg]

Whoever does the next thread could add a poll “have you done Lucy Aeroplanes freebie for food banks? Then we could see who did it without OTing the thread.
J’ackuuse Jack is the worst Jack. Stop giving out to legally qualified professionals you clownshoe

Has anyone managed to do it without creating an account? I'm happy to buy a pack and donate if not able to claim without making an account with Pampers!

 

[hoopdedoo]

Jack shows screenshots of bank accounts to show how poor she is.

Jack posts to say a genuine poor would never say she was poor.

More pertinent question. What has happened to all the patreon money she got 12 days abo? If her rent is due mid-month, it couldn't have gone on that.

(allegedly, m'lud)

 

[L3moning]

Countdown to deactivation

This is probably too late for a thread title nom, sadly

 

[Hollaaa]

I have a couple of questions about this system
View attachment 1955265
Question 1. So in this system for house-emptying, you get rid of the tiny engagement rings “to free up “mental clutter” on August 13th, yet hold on to 12 enormous bookcases and 16 filing cabinets for another six months til mid-February before giving them to your dad?
View attachment 1955268

Question 2. If you started this decluttering system “about 7 years ago” in January-February 2016, was that the same “about 7 years ago” where in Jan 2016 you’d just taken six months to move and unpack with 3 Luton vans, 7 estate cars and an “enormous moving operation”?
View attachment 1955301
And carried on buying and accumulating shit…? Because I think your “system” might be BULLSHIT. Just like you, you acquisitive twit.
View attachment 1955309
SS from @colouredlines AMAZING post of all Jack’s moves and trashed cluttered houses during this “7 year decluttering”

Jack Monroe #267 Could it be a different scheme you helped set up?

I’ll take the glass jars full of table salt and twigs if she throws in a coat hanger extension made from ring pulls.

tattle.life

7 is the new 344, pass it on.