Jack Monroe #371 Veni, vidi, receipti

[Orphan_Black]

Och Aye wee Fraus*, you join us here in bonny Scotland as Jack has landed in the land of Haggis and bagpipes for her Very Important Work thing. For real.

Well done to @Geetbo for nominating @Ooointitot 's title nomination. You get a drink token for a local eatery in Edinburgh, Dishoom, you haven't heard of it. The voucher is only valid on tap water. Enjoy!

Yes! Jack turned up in Edinburgh, to actually work. Unfathomable.

Content and Coops are missing in action.

The blog is turning heads all over the hellsite.

Please help recap, and if someone could post the link for the talk, much appreciated. Ta, pals!

*Again apologies for my butchering of your nation dear Scottish tender ones.

 

[Goldman]

Peekyboo! Jack would rather peel her eye balls out with rusty spoons than have a career in TV.
Then:

Now:

 

[Into_the_tunnel]

The same property:

Small bungalow.
View attachment 1522493

Massive house.
View attachment 1522495

1. 20hr days? I thought it was 16 in the farewell tweet to Matt?

2. 1 phone? She has mentioned numerous times about having 2.

3. Bungalow being in chaos? I thought she had time to deep clean it 12 times a day?

Oh Jack, please please do the honourable thing and make something from the bleeping list.

 

[Satisfying Click]

Mini-recap. Many new fraus discovered the joy of cringe in the masterpiece of Daily Kitchen Live. In totally unrelated news, Jack proceeded to tell us in an utterly random tweet that she does not want a TV career and would instead prefer to self-injure using rusty teaspoons (presumably from her own collection).

 

[HalcyonDays]

Go ahead Jack and scoop your squinty, photoshopped eyes out with your antique spoons. Then disappear from public sight and learn to live in the real world. You disgust me. You deserve absolutely nothing. Shame on you for every bit of damage you have inflicted on well meaning people who have a heart, a soul, a conscience and who laid themselves on the line in good faith for... what? What exactly are you? You are an absolute disgrace.

 

[OwlRightsReserved]

I've also just realised that the venue she's speaking at tomorrow requires her navigating a junction that will have her praying for a roundabout, even on foot.

Let chaos commence.

 

[FlirtyThirty]

Hahahahahahahaha turning down TV work ahahahahahahahaha.

That idiot would turn up to the opening of an envelope if she thought it would get her ever-changing mug on the tellybox.

 

[Limey]

I've also just realised that the venue she's speaking at tomorrow requires her navigating a junction that will have her praying for a roundabout, even on foot.

Let chaos commence.

LOLZ good luck at Tollcross, pal. Many have perished.

When I was a student I used to live on the Meadows () and go to work on Gorgie Road, that junction nearly ended me many times.

 

[Orphan_Black]

Hahahahahahahaha turning down TV work ahahahahahahahaha.

That idiot would turn up to the opening of an envelope if she thought it would get her ever-changing mug on the tellybox.

She's either getting paid a small fortune for her two talks in Edinburgh or she's being gifted a token trophy of some sort. Only explanation for her hot footing it up there.

 

[sleepingsatellite]

Couple of thoughts/questions. How long do we think before
1) The squig writing the Unherd piece gets a gentle DM warning her against it
2) JM braves rattling the tip jar again?

 

[Limey]

She's either getting paid a small fortune for her two talks in Edinburgh or she's being gifted a token trophy of some sort. Only explanation for her hot footing it up there.

Unlikely, it always used to be a standard fee for authors, even Ian Rankin got the same as someone publishing their first novel. Would be surprised if it had changed.

 

[Geetbo]

 

[Limey]

Unlikely, it always used to be a standard fee for authors, even Ian Rankin* got the same as someone publishing their first novel. Would be surprised if it had changed.

*not just Ian Rankin, was trying to think of someone considered a 'name' at the Book Fest

 

[MaineCoonMama]

Couple of thoughts/questions. How long do we think before
1) The squig writing the Unherd piece gets a gentle DM warning her against it
2) JM braves rattling the tip jar again?

She'll rattle that jar soon enough. It's like a compulsion or muscle memory.

 

[Cucumberthunder]

Couple of thoughts/questions. How long do we think before
1) The squig writing the Unherd piece gets a gentle DM warning her against it
2) JM braves rattling the tip jar again?

I don't think jack would dare go up against that squig

 

[HalcyonDays]

I've also just realised that the venue she's speaking at tomorrow requires her navigating a junction that will have her praying for a roundabout, even on foot.

Let chaos commence.

She doesn't need a roundabout to tie herself up in circles...

 

[jenny2603]

Unlikely, it always used to be a standard fee for authors, even Ian Rankin got the same as someone publishing their first novel. Would be surprised if it had changed.

There are lots of media people to haunt in Edinburgh at this time of year. I think that'll be the main draw, this bollocks today is a desperate and doomed attempt to seem like she's in such demand she can turn stuff down. She hasn't been offered a thing and won't be.

 

[Clapster1]

I know it can be said just about every day but I bloody love TD! She is everything.

 

[NellieBoo]

1. 20hr days? I thought it was 16 in the farewell tweet to Matt?

2. 1 phone? She has mentioned numerous times about having 2.

3. Bungalow being in chaos? I thought she had time to deep clean it 12 times a day?

Oh Jack, please please do the honourable thing and make something from the bleeping list.

It's worth mentioning again that there are many, many creators on tiktok producing decent cooking/food content of every conceivable type, using theirs phones. Sometimes cooking one handed, sometimes using a tripod or overhead camera. Some of them have managed to produce books in a timely fashion too. Shocking, I know.

Or, alternatively, she could get in with the tiktok grifting crowd and make money through gifts on lives and battles .

 

[Into_the_tunnel]

If she came to our book festival (which she never would - the odd combination of real tough nuts and poshos would terrify her), I would stand outside the venue and dance to chill out rave music.

Pete Tong and his orchestra. That kind of thing. Just loud enough to piss her off. Not too loud to get myself removed. I would have a great time (as would the poshos and those who spend their time “chilling” in town).

I might put sign on Tunnel Dog that said “granola for all”. Don’t want to push my luck though.