Jack Monroe #322 Mr T Roll and the Mitty Bungalow Mystery

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Rosie sent me to GOMI and I also wasted probably weeks of my life on her threads. Also, how SHIT is GOMI now? It’s almost unusable. Thinking about it, Alice and Jack are kind of peas in a pod…
Yep, it’s unusable. Shame, as it used to be hilarious. I used to read Dooce,ThatWife, art of making a baby, Stephanie Nielsen. They had all the best crazies - including Alice, who banned me for a pm to someone else. Jack’s threads here are better though.
 
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No weekends off here!

I have a job that people say they couldn't do . But I genuinely could NOT be a teacher. Particularly secondary <shudder>. My son and his mates were absolute horrors from year 8/9. We had enough trouble coping with 1 + mates let alone a whole 100+ cohort. It's my worst nightmare . I couldn't tolerate the smell of lynx and victoria secret body spray before we get to the attitude and arseyness. Secondary school teachers have the patience of saints.
 
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I read the surname of Jacks parents.
Hadjicofas.
So, her name is Jack Hadjicofas?
This could be written in the Patreon receipt email.
“Thanks, Jack Hadjicofas, next she’ll have ya benefits.”
 
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Carers don't either. Jack is a cunt. She has no idea. She is so privileged and it's showing. She's been all around the world from Africa to the USA, Europe but its never good enough for her.
 
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There is absolutely zero wrong with going away without your kids but for context my mum was a single parent and not once in our lives did we go on holiday when she wasn't there. Only when we were on school holidays. Where she went we went and that was it. Jack is dumping her 12 year old kid to go on holiday with someone she's been dating 6 months and I am sorry I think that is shite. Every single family holiday my mum went on when I was wee I was there. No ifs. No buts

He should be her priority. Not someone she's been shagging for 6 months
 
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so are we all in agreement now that OH is either a vampire or a ghost?

"Oh does that slop have garlic in? Terribly sorry Jack but I can't eat that, gives me chronic indigestion. Horribly allergic you see. Looks lovely though, no really, you enjoy!"
 
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This is what fucks me off about her city breaks. Presenting them as a cheeky lil sneaking off because she deserves it. Utterly tone deaf to the fact for a lot of people this is impossible.
No mention of saving up for ages, or it being her only holiday for years - just something people always do when they want a break.
And still she will pretend she is poor and oppressed and deprived.
 
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Jacks only priority is Jack. I hope that SBs dad makes him feel valued.
 
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It's galling, her target audience (supposedly) I.e people like me can't even afford a stay cation and it's logistically difficult to find a suitable holiday destination for disabled children and all their equipment and meds. I don't have anyone I can trust to give my children the correct care and that includes family purely because they are elderly and live on the other side of Scotland. Jack never considers that she is very lucky to have a healthy child. Not one aspect of her 'work' has ever benefitted poor or disabled people. It's self serving. Her squigs are wilfully blind.
 
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She's an absolute fucking dementor. I go to a music festival once a year(in the UK)
and I save for it all year. She's an entitled cunt

A fucking horror who was on benefits a decade ago actually get to fuck the spoiled brat

I am actually really pissed off that I bought three of her books thinking she was skint

And when I find them ill be throwing them in my general waste bin
 
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My husband and I occasionally have a night away from my kids, usually around a birthday or an anniversary, however it is literally one night and we are back my lunch the next morning, mainly due to not taking the piss on our babysitter and also because well we have had a break, spent quality time together and are ready too see our kids again. I honestly could not leave them for days on end. I'd he going stir crazy not to mention I don't have that generous of babysitters,( they have lives too)
 
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I demand an anecdote about her wanting to go for a coffee she doesn't drink apart from when she does and stepping into a coffee shop with a strange smell. She thought she would just buy a jar of herbs to add to her dustier-than-Aunt-Helen spice library when Harold said 'darling, I rather think these are DRUGS PEOPLE'. They fell about laughing at their naiveté and left the shop quicker than MOD land, lest they get a contact high from one second-hand weed.
 
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Nothing wrong with that. I would never criticise anyone who left their kids for a night or two to have a celebration

But she's an arse who uses her kid for publicity and then fucks off on holiday with her latest shagpiece

I will not apologise for saying it as it is because she's a horrible person who used her son for sympathy and fucks off on holiday without him

Thankfully he seems to have a better life with his dad
 
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The main bit of the alcoholism story of hers that makes me is apparently going from 200 units/week to her Guardian article 1 week sober feeling all fresh and rosy. The withdrawal process, esp if you went through it without any detox support would be absolutely hellish after that heavy drinking. It wouldn't be all fine and dandy, 'getting so much done around the house' etc. If someone had been consistently drinking heavily like that, seizures, DTs and actually dying are real risks. Without the sedation of alcohol suppressing the nervous system that the brain is used to, the brain and nervous system are left on overdrive. Hallucinations, severe anxiety and paranoia are common. After a week the worst would likely be over, but you'd be fragile, tired (sleep takes a good while to come back to normal), anxious and probably just building your appetite back up gradually.

I've come to quite dislike the term alcoholic. I feel it has such a stigma attached to it, and conjures up a very specific image of what one looks like, how they present and behave. Whereas alcohol misuse/problems/alcohol use disorder presents in so many different ways. There's lots of ways in which someone can have a problem with alcohol, and they often need different support approaches. Labeling people alcoholic or not, and nothing in between doesn't capture the full spectrum of it at all. In my opinion anyways .
 
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Was Jack due to go see the Rolling Stones in Amsterdam? Mick Jagger has pulled out due to Covid, or was he too afraid to face old Jackie. She has this effect on people.
 
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Send them to her agent/publisher without any postage
 
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Was Jack due to go see the Rolling Stones in Amsterdam? Mick Jagger has pulled out due to Covid, or was he too afraid to face old Jackie. She has this effect on people.
"Hi Mick, I've made this amazing dessert for you and the boys. It's like a cross between a pie and a crumble..."

"Cough cough, oh no, off to self-isolate, sorry!"
 
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Was Jack due to go see the Rolling Stones in Amsterdam? Mick Jagger has pulled out due to Covid, or was he too afraid to face old Jackie. She has this effect on people.
He's well away, he's heard that Jack's into older men these days
 
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