I have made it to the present day. What a grunk - bum guns, Findus pizza, "the big boy"
. I feel like I've scaled Everest.
Sorry to harp back to what was days ago, but there's something that has really radiator-dried my mushrooms, and that's Jack recommending cheap bleach and vinegar for cleaning without the caveat that
you should never mix said bleach with said vinegar. Typical household bleach is sodium hypochlorite, which when mixed with acid (like that in vinegar), releases chlorine gas.
No wonder her pets keep dying, she's bloody Wilfred Owen-ing them. The woman's an outright danger.