Jack Monroe #246 Vimes Boots Index cheese £1

[Silver Linings]

Title by general consensus of the previous thread.

Spoiler: Housekeeping

Please remember no thread titles until the tail end of the thread and to add ‘thread title’ or ‘thread title nomination’. No swearing in them please.

Wiki is the pink button for newbies, give it a read if you have a chance between the chaos! It has the receipts, unlike Jack.

I’m tired and watching the news so if someone could recap the recent madness that’d be good.

 

[Pixieboots]

Is anyone else horribly tempted to fill Twitter with receipts ABOUT Jack under the hashtag? I shan't, obviously, but the temptation is so strong.

 

[Cucumberthunder]

Is anyone else horribly tempted to fill Twitter with receipts ABOUT Jack under the hashtag? I shan't, obviously, but the temptation is so strong.

Perhaps we could all post what we would do on the hashtag on here, so newbies could see? What receipt would you show?

For me it would probably be a mention of the crappy bungalow accompanied with pictures of how spacious it is.

 

[Falkor]

Is anyone else horribly tempted to fill Twitter with receipts ABOUT Jack under the hashtag? I shan't, obviously, but the temptation is so strong.

No, but I'm very tempted to go into all my local supermarkets, buy one of everything in the value/basics range that are still at the same price as they used to be and submit those. Would that count as taking it off Tattle though?

 

[FlirtyThirty]

I'll give it a go at a recap...

We were all having a nice normal day, Jack was promising x3 a week slop then BAM! Hyperbole Inflation! Food is 10 million pounds more expensive than it ever was and the poors are buying all of it.

Jack was back on all the telly and radio hasn't slept for seventeen days and has a new ailment - convulsive migraines!

But it will all be okay because she is, with an anti-cabal of experts off twitter, creating the VIMES BOOTS INDEX. Which will be very useful, apparently. Except it will be nonsensical shite. If it ever happens (LOL).

 

[Clovis]

Don't forget to email all your receipts for printing. We shall overcome!

 

[Legionnairess]

No, but I'm very tempted to go into all my local supermarkets, buy one of everything in the value/basics range that are still at the same price as they used to be and submit those. Would that count as taking it off Tattle though?

OMG Falkor I was going to do exactly the same tomorrow! Then send them the receipt.

 

[kachoochoo]

woo-hoo! I'd've rioted too if it hadn't been some form of this!

Is anyone else horribly tempted to fill Twitter with receipts ABOUT Jack under the hashtag? I shan't, obviously, but the temptation is so strong.

I'm kinda tempted to go round as many asdas as poss, buying 45p rice and sending her the receipts

SHAN'T ofc

 

[ecdb]

@kachoochoo
Please could you add this to The List? Inbox to zero by bedtime. (Flexibility allowed currently given Jack doesn’t sleep, instead preferring to spend the wee small hours working out how much Judith from Huddersfield spent on denture cream and Soren malted fruit loaf in 2013.)

 

[kachoochoo]

@kachoochoo
Please could you add this to The List? Inbox to zero by bedtime. (Flexibility allowed currently given Jack doesn’t sleep, instead preferring to spend the wee small hours working out how much Judith from Huddersfield spent on denture cream and Soren malted fruit loaf in 2013.)
View attachment 1013289

consider it done, dear heart

apols, I believe I was in a fugue state that day

 

[Flash123]

As it’s a new thread I would like to remind both new and old readers that she hasn’t paid taxes for two years!

 

[Bellllls]

Just sayin.

 

[Sideboard Bob]

These receipts being emailed to Jack will pretty much all be sent as email attachments right? Isn’t that a bit of a risk? I’m not part of an IT crack team for NASA but I’m sure I heard that a lot of computer viruses are sent via opening attachments?

 

[ecdb]

consider it done, dear heart

apols, I believe I was in a fugue state that day

Went through The List with tears and squeals of laughter. My partner thinks I’m having an affair, I believe.

‘Setting teenage musings to music’
DECEASED.

 

[sioc]

Hey she's fighting a universal fight for the people who wouldn't have a voice without her.

Oh, no wait, actually it's literally only about her local Asda.

(Top tip, if the further away supermarket still has all the value items it might in fact absolutely be worth spending the 4quid on the bus)

 

[PoorPatrol]

The poor squiggles she recruits for her Working Group ™️. They’ll be sat in a semi-circle, led by god, in her “crappy bungalow” with spiral stairs, perched on all the chairs, surrounded by burglar-trampled bits of paper. They’ll be frantically trying to reconcile an invisible receipt for 500g basmati rice from Lewisham Tesco in October 2013, with 1kg of long grain from ASDA in Newcastle from March 2017, and weeping with frustration.

They will be paid handsomely for their graft, in the form of a FaceTuned picture of a random local tree, lovingly hand-framed in Wilkos finest deforestation squares. They’ll be in the post, Squigs!

 

[kirkvanhouten]

Just popping by to say I feel like she was finally getting sussed out but now has it all covered and were almost back to where it all started.

Everyone I know seems to take her word as gospel

 

[Lemonsweets91]

Hey she's fighting a universal fight for the people who wouldn't have a voice without her.

View attachment 1013349

Oh, no wait, actually it's literally only about her local Asda.

(Top tip, if the further away supermarket still has all the value items it might in fact absolutely be worth spending the 4quid on the bus)

But she only shops online???

 

[appleskin]

@LadyWhistledown21
someone might have the receipts but she did beg for money to her paypal to go for media training a few years back

Everything is a beg with her

 

[heretoreaditall2019]

@Dogmuck she’s currently on 256 Patreons, using our absolute min of £3.50 a sub & max 12% fee that’s £788.48 this payday!

Also what about corner shops or small chains like TFC or lituanica? You don’t get itemised receipts off them…?? Probs just go under FOOD £1?