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[Silver Linings]

 

[Ninch55]

Now I think about it it’s extremely similar to a meal we had in a box last week…

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I know there’s nothing new under the sun and I suppose she doesn’t need Gousto when she has Ocado but it’s telling of just how much she lies and lies and lies about everything that this thought even passed through my brain.

(I feel officially like I have transcended a class boundary in becoming someone who can order recipe boxes. Wish there had been a teacher who had derided my working class background so I could passive-aggressively send them my order confirmation email: “See? SEE?! You said I’d never amount to anything but now someone measures out my herbs for me!”)

There’s this too, if anyone feels like cooking a hearty meal this evening. You can use clean cutlery though.

 

[Veronicaaa]

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Awww it would have been perfect for one of those 50 shades of beige postcards you set up a new patreon tier for and then never spoke of again.

 

[Django]

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Speaking of lumpy beige, where is the snuggly blanket

 

[SweetTransvestite]

Her pronouns are getting children fed, or something

Probably won't find that option on the Fortnum & Mason website though

 

[Pavlova]

Not the rug, surely?

Eww with all the bits caught in it. A totally ideal thing to have in the kitchen to trip up those ouchy feet when you're ferrying hot pans about... she's a professional doncha know...(massive eye roll).

 

[Into_the_tunnel]

Just to keep everyone updated.

Food has to be beige.
Clothes have to be black(ish).
Kitchen has to be minging rainbow coloured.

 

[Orphan_Black]

Just to keep everyone updated.

Food has to be beige.
Clothes have to be black(ish).
Kitchen has to be minging rainbow coloured.

Eyelids have to be confectionary inspired.

 

[Veronicaaa]

Ummm tesco red wine stock pots aren't alcohol free? Ingredients list says 12%. wtf is she doing??

 

[Silver Linings]

 

[Peachy9]

Ummm tesco red wine stock pots aren't alcohol free? Ingredients list says 12%. wtf is she doing??

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Let's hope the Tesco twitter account corrects her

 

[Orphan_Black]

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I don't like artichokes, my tip? Don't eat them. Vinegar ain't making them taste any better!

 

[Silver Linings]

 

[DisgruntledGoat]

Ummm tesco red wine stock pots aren't alcohol free? Ingredients list says 12%. wtf is she doing??

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This is just insanity, is she using cooking with wine as some kind of flex as to how bad an alcoholic she was? You cook the alcohol off you bleeping berk. And yes, of course for abstinence for any reason I understand why you wouldn’t use it but stop trying to elevenerife your fabricated problems with coq-au-vin. God she’s exhausting.

 

[Marmalade Atkins]

Does she mean SMIDGE?

 

[Ellabella]

The idea that that kitchen is deep cleaned 12 times a day is the biggest laugh I've had in weeks.

 

[Skyfall]

Absolutely love the forensic Patreon spreadsheets. Of course what we need to also bear in mind is the ‘tip jar’ and the ‘Twitter tips’ that are separate.

Rehab & therapy for 12 weeks sure is expensice

 

[Silver Linings]

Her language around alcohol is very triggering to alcoholics too, all glugs and booze.

 

[BlendedSlop]

Her degree is going well then. Must be well on her way to a third doctorate by now. Those tassel baskets are vile btw. They look like something a snake would appear out of if you played a flute near it but with frumpy accoutrements. It gives off strong hot air balloon basket vibes as well.

Also it's bleeping CANNELLINI you gormless bean-rinser. C-A-N-N-E-L-L-I-N-I. Two Ls, for Louisa Left.

This entire post is *chef's kiss*
I love you Sidey-T.

Jack's version of snake charming would be pounding at the household piano with one hand while tweeting with the other. One by one, larded snakes (would usually be buttered but when you can't afford butter, needs must) would rise out of the baskets, sidle up to her and hiss in her ear "You know, you really dessssserve that ssssssixteenth ssssssideboard. Treat yourssssself."

 

[FlirtyThirty]

Just caught up with @heretoreaditall2019 's excellent update on last year's Patreon FACTS. Thank you so much for that dear heart. It's just absolutely mind boggling that people are paying for her to do f all.

I feel like recently she's not even attempting to make out that she's even working. Nothing about the ridiculously overdue books, no "writing" selfies or TV appearances. She hasn't been on a podcast for a while and at one point it felt like she was on podcast after podcast. She just posts about her lunch and what she's been "sorting" at home. It's blatantly obvious that she's using the Patreon cash to fund a life of leisure. WHY CAN'T THE SQUIGS SEE THIS??!!

Do you think they’ve confused Patreon with just plain patron, like whores of yore??