Jack Monroe #234 A Grifty Kind of Self-Love

[Wooh]

I expected the instructions for less confident cooks would have provided plain English, easy to follow instructions

Jack, I am an anti fan, true, but I'm happy to pass on a good tip. it's helpful to start with a title stating what your "recipe" hopes to achieve. This works for uni essays, too

 

[Veronicaaa]

c) That cheese concoction is a monstrosity. She's supposed to be a cook! Teach people how to make a proper roux, you total whelk. Or, indeed, learn how to make one, because I'm doubting her ability to even do something as simple as that.

Butter + flour, then milk, then cheese. Takes 7 mins tops.

She can't cook bechamel, she can't spell it and she can't cook it. Nice of her to remind us of that fact so ... thoroughly though.

 

[BananaSmith]

Oh for crying out loud, she's PERSONALLY trolling me now

View attachment 950290

I see Jack's still not learnt how to make a white/cheese sauce

 

[Malkiavelli]

Why does she still say calm down Twitter, when nobody on Twitter literally ever gives her flack? She's directly referencing a whole other site, she's that obsessed with tattle

"can't so much as breathe on here" as if, you'd block anyone who breathed your way on there. She has no idea how many hate followers she'll have, I'd love to see her tweet stats vs engagement.

Party til 4 when he’s not there, early night in with a cup of tea when he’s down to party. Makes sense..

 

[OwlRightsReserved]

She can't cook bechamel, she can't spell it and she can't cook it. Nice of her to remind us of that fact so ... thoroughly though.

I can't get over the suggestion to add water.

Roux + milk, I understand; like you say, = bechamel.

Roux + stock or broth = velouté.

Roux + water = ??? Not a thing.

 

['EllsBells]

duck me, she is in NO position to offer advice for people with swallowing difficulties. It's far more complex than 'purees' even though she is experienced at producing them, albeit accidentally.

Advice from people who are not qualified in this field can be actively dangerous.

The nutritional balance is vitally important I would think? Getting the food balances right is why nutritionists spend years training?

 

[Cookiecookie]

i have read this twice over and i still don’t understand what this recipe is

Probably for the best! I think it's meant to be a cheese sauce. Why the need for fannying about with blenders and such is beyond me though. She makes things so needlessly complicated.

 

[Veronicaaa]

Oh you mean you cook it the way it's meant to be cooked? And explain it simply? More fool you, squig!

 

[blurstoftimes]

The nutritional balance is vitally important I would think? Getting the food balances right is why nutritionists spend years training?

speaking of nutritionists, jack has gone very quiet on the whole uni thing. If she’s quit already i, for one, am shocked.

 

[Pocahontas]

She can't cook bechamel, she can't spell it and she can't cook it. Nice of her to remind us of that fact so ... thoroughly though.

Her enduring inability with béchamel is your béchamel-noir.

I wonder how many of Jack’s many radios she will have on?

 

[BananaSmith]

PS still waiting on the opal fruits make up! I feel this will be my

Spoiler: spoiler

Granola

 

[Veronicaaa]

Her enduring inability with béchamel is your béchamel-noir.

I was literally going to describe it as my bete noir but couldn't be arsed with all the accents so thankyou. Ugh it grates my mushrooms man.

 

[Marmalade Atkins]

#JackMonroesLeftoverLarder
#JackMonroesXmasLarder

 

[OwlRightsReserved]

Her enduring inability with béchamel is your béchamel-noir.

I wonder how many of Jack’s many radios she will have on?

Absolutely none of them tuned to Classic FM mind, because Jack couldn't tell Elgar from her elbow.

 

[Flash123]

Her enduring inability with béchamel is your béchamel-noir.

I wonder how many of Jack’s many radios she will have on?

Béchamel noir for thread title! (Sorry)

I’m really confused about the recipe…. So for freezing food you cut up the chunks of cheese and cover with milk and water?

 

[Veronicaaa]

Cheesetrosity lol

 

[Sideboard Bob]

“Use within 3 days” … as WHAT though?!

 

[Rekyavikgirl]

Minging- the flour needs to be properly cooked out. This is basic level stuff Jack, FFS get it together.

 

[Veronicaaa]

“Use within 3 days” … as WHAT though?!

Plaster of Paris?

 

[CottageWitch]

my pleather trousers in the 90s were from internacionale. it's pleasing that we all went through a similar phase

My pleather trouser phase was only about 3 years ago so I'm not sure I'm allowed in the cool club...