Jack Monroe #219 Why you sob? Russell Hobb

[MooBelle]

Oooooh, @MooBelle how can you tell?

Jack had a tantrum about it. TD doesn't have a huge following but is very well respected by professionals. From what I can gather Jack tried to be get BFF but TD saw right through her.
When Jack started slagging off other people's trifles on Twitter by retweeting the pictures and putting nasty comments on them TD hit back. The majority of them weren't professional, just home cooks proud of their puddings and Jack just slagged them all off in a snobby way because she is a 'literal food expert'.
TD got her name because she defended trifles!
Jack got huffy when a Squiggle suggested TDs blog and said TD had blocked her ages ago.

 

[BeautifulTrauma]

The cake was soaking up the prune juice, so I’ve no idea how she managed the photo she did with it lying on top.

It just felt really dense to put a spoon through and some cakes I get it are meant to be, but even the smell was revolting. Never again. She’s a conwoman.

 

[colouredlines]

She

I have the goods.

(Just as a side note, it cost £4.03 for five of the items, so it’s certainly not 2p per serving or whatever it is she claims)

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Thank you for taking one for the team. Good luck.

I am in London this weekend, visiting my mum for the first time in two years(!!!), and I'm not gonna lie, I'm a bit tempted to serve her up some Jack slop as a prank, and to see how far I can push the limits of maternal love.

 

[Boyo]

Do you remember the time Jack had a massive eye?

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November 18, 2020. Screenshot: @Silver Linings

Here’s the unedited less edited version:

 

[kachoochoo]

I mean, it's solid. the ingredients are identifiable, yet it's still one of the worst things she's ever produced

and why do the words "homemade vinegar" fill me with dread?

 

[StringyMango]

"The rest of her earnings go to food banks"

 

[Flash123]

Been browsing the DKL hashtag. This looks dry as a bone! I thought it was a burnt fruit crumble but apparently it is Jack’s lasagne recipe

 

[Boyo]

 

[Django]

Can we have a category in The Sloppies for the best/worst cable recreation of Jack's recipes? Orphy B's sweaty slow cooker bread and @Fruitjack's hairy jackfruit patties still haunt me but I think without even seeing it I can declare @BeautifulTrauma's attempt will be a real contender.

Or poor @MancBee and his soup, the soup that nearly killed a man.

 

[FrumpyCat]

I think she means when she undercooked some pasta and lost her slot. Fair play to her for actually tagging This Morning, still not getting asked back though

I think Jack was admitting the shed kitchen was a fire risk, a waste of time and money, and a fucking stupid idea.

Which, in a way, is progress.

 

[Dogmuck]

Guys come on, you know why it’s tea lights on the table. Bonfire night triggers a deep seated pain that is entwined into the very fibre of her being because when she was a fireman/woman/person call operator, bonfire night was the busiest night of the year (except Christmas didn’t she tell us Christmas was once?) and attending all those fires, her frontline experience, because of the calls she’s seen heard things most others can’t even imagine. So now for her own safety and sanity, she doesn’t light a bonfire but instead marks this auspicious occasion with dozens of tea lights, sat safely in random glasses and jars not made for tea lights right in front of the pink curtains to enable her to carve out her special lickle smol place in the universe. It’s not that hard to understand ffs ninnies!

 

[Veronicaaa]

She's liked the Russell Hobbs offer of a freebie kettle #shameless

 

[Marmalade Atkins]

Proving once again she still reads these threads.

 

[Sideboard Bob]

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“Salvador Dalí plates“, omg squig they’re just a slightly weird shape, they’re hardly up there with the melting clocks.

 

[colouredlines]

She always takes her Facetune to a weird, Uncanny Valley place that makes her look deeply unsettling. It's the photo equivalent of taking some text, Google Translating it into Korean, then back to English. Something is just not right.

 

[Droosie123]

I am absolutely raging that RH gifted the grifter a new kettle when she recently spackwd £35 on a plastic Halloween decoration . FFS how shameless do you have to be to act in this way, it's not as though her family are poor, they could have easily replaced it for her , my Mum on a pension would have done this for me in a heartbeat.

She really is utterly awful isn't she?

 

[Tabitha D]

I want to know who all these bum-lickers are who rhapsodise about her clearly revolting food. Do they have no eyes, no taste buds? Or are they just raving poshos being patronising to someone they see as a pet pov who needs a bit of encouragement? Would any of them be caught dead actually tasting her food (I suspect not)? It’s completely baffling when most of her food looks like actual shit.
(Although at least I don’t see Nigella commenting on any of this stuff - she may be a bit soft but she’s not stupid).

 

[BeautifulTrauma]

One thing is for certain though, she needs stopping.

I can’t imagine people would stay in her group for long, even with her stint in voluntary rehab it ended with her becoming the mother hen and some miraculous transformation signified by wearing colour again. She makes serious situations like AA and therapy sound so twee and like it’s a day out, I seriously doubt she was ever an alcoholic, just someone who drank too much occasionally but Jack being Jack always has to be the worst of everything. She’s a vile, narcissistic predator. God help her next lesbian meal ticket.

 

[BeautifulTrauma]

Jack now follows:

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The greedy goblin has accepted the free kettle hasn’t she Actually shameless and as thick as the shit prune cake to believe people wouldn’t figure it out.

 

[Veronicaaa]

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Just getting the falafels in.

It's just occurred to me that she seems to have turned cranberry sauce into a .... sauce. Hold on to your hats, ninnies, this may rival her tomato soup recipe (main ingredient - a tin of tomato soup).