Jack Monroe #116 Burger and lies

[jenny2603]

Cheers, @TriviaNewtonJohn - been looking for the right avatar for ages! *doffs cap* hope you don’t mind me appropriating your genius artwork?

Bloody hell these threads move faster than lingreenie through a digestive system! Have done a v limited grunk and I see it’s basically the same old tit from the usual grifter. Not sure why she’s attempting to hoy fried pineapple out the window though. Is she hoping to disturb the Brambly Mice?


Woah. I totally missed this iteration. What’s that on her head?

It's Cooper's dad (RIP)

 

[traumatised sideboard]

All the Jack incarnations have provided a veritable bounty of excellent material for photoshops. Someone must have done this before, surely? This one is a special edition Streaking Jack, complete with cat paw socks.

 

[kachoochoo]

I adore the red hair Jack so much! and let's not forget that it is her guardian photo to this day!

 

[blurstoftimes]

me in year 7 on my first day of school

me in year 10 once i'd started smoking and discovered Radiohead

 

[squiffle]

Reminds me of Adrian Mole’s poems

yes! “I implore ye, don’t ignore me”

 

[Knit one Pearl one]

It's Cooper's dad (RIP)

Brilliant!

 

[TitsMcGee]

This is who I see...

 

[DinosaurSenior]

Edinburgh Jack is my .....(least) favourite

 

[holliebollie]

Don't forget dead auntie who is now 'dust'. One of our DKL faves xoxo

Am I the only one who found her dusty Aunt comment genuinely funny?!?! That is literally the one thing she’s ever said that I’ve laughed (internally) at. A comedian she ain’t.

 

[jenny2603]

Jack relaunching the old tips jar. Head to toe in Vivienne Westwood (RIP)

**Not so much Alan's Big Plate as a random cracked saucer but I am to photo manipulation as Jack is to food.

 

[FridayFunDay]

She is so 2004 there

 

[Alansbigplate]

 

[BlendedSlop]

I've laughed up both lungs over this thread tonight and I'm beyond happy that discussion has moved on to Red Haystack Jack. That particular look is a source of endless fascination to me, not least because she was apparently so enamoured with it that she used it for her Guardian byline AND her historic Hopkins trial (I'm studying law right now and was so disappointed to not see Jack staring back at me from my textbook when we did libel).

 

[Themaninblack]

Have just seen a clip of Nigela saying "meekrowahhhvay" instead of "microwave" and now I wonder if Jack will copy "Mom" and pronounce things in a similar fashion.

P.s. I keep getting adverts on this thread for onesies with a bottom flap...what the?!

Vlad thinks you might be tempted to eat Jack's recipes?

 

[People-huv-tae-know]

Ah Irn Bru Eraserhead Jack, how I've (not) missed you. At least you can see what she really looks like in those pics and she definitely looks mardy but I bet she hid from Hopkins all the same.
I saw Marcus Rashford in Tesco tonight. Does that make us close colleagues now?

Vlad is calling to us Fraus.

 

[waffle maker]

I reckon somebody has had a massive word with Jack and that's why she's hardly been online. can't be that BUSY...

 

[Flivver]

She’s either BUSY or there’s drama, SEVERE illness or she’s working in Brussels trying to negotiate a Brexit deal.

 

[Tabitha D]

To me it looks like someone who is searching for their true self. Those pictures are of someone that is unhappy with who they are, and is trying new styles and personalities.

She will never be happy until she is comfortable in her own skin, with her own style and her own personality.

She clearly doesn't like herself and is searching for the ~her~ that she does like.

Just my opinion, I'm no psychiatrist.

I agree with this. I don’t think she has a clue who she is or what she wants. That’s why she seems so aimless and can’t stick to anything IMO. She doesn’t seem to believe in anything enough (or for long enough) to commit to it.

 

[LeftToMyOwnDevices]

yes! “I implore ye, don’t ignore me”

The pantry door creaks showing empty Fablon shelves
The freezer echoes with mournful electrical whirrings
The boy goes ragged trousered to school
The woman waits at the letterbox
The bills line up behind the clock
The dog* whimpers empty-bellied in sleep
The building society writes letters penned in vitriol
The house** waits, waits, waits.
Waits for the giro***

* Brambly mice
** crappy bungalow
*** Patreon

 

[Captainmouse]

They have been playing a clip on the radio this morning of nigella pronouncing microwave it is bizarre, meecrow warvey!

Completely agree, it does not have to be Cordon Bleu school or whatever but a nutrition course would not do her and other internet gurus who preach about food harm either. There is so much damage being done, I am not solely referring to JM. Those raw vegans basically eating or pretending to eat a diet loaded with fruit sugar or eating too little and then have their hair falling out, if the latter is not a lie. But as @NoseyParkour pointed out-her actual relationship with food is a disturbed one, so no course will ever fix it.
I have to agree that she really did have things thrown at her. I mean, who survives that long in any showbiz environment, always being given more chances while constantly spoiling it. Normally you disappear if you don't deliver but she was very lucky. And you are right, she could practice in her bloody shed doing Youtube clips if you are not a complete natural talent. Why does she not make that most obvious choice??
The chances that I would survive in the TV world are very low, not that I have been given the chance but I don't sit around thinking I am entitled to and suited for a TV career. JM always seems to be lacking something that she thinks she deserves while never acknowledging what she has got.

Before any of that she needs a hygiene course! She’s a horror. 3 courses of the trots at chez mackie