Narcissist Rage
Alice has been raging for most of her life,I think, but since Ioan left her and met someone else, it’s off the scale.
1. The narcissist doesn’t get his or her way, even when it’s unreasonable.
2. The narcissist is criticized in some way, even when the critique is made diplomatically, reasonably, and constructively.
3. The narcissist isn’t treated as the center of
attention, even when there are other priorities.
4. The narcissist is caught breaking rules, violating social norms, or disregarding
boundaries
5. The narcissist is asked to be accountable for his or her actions.
6. The narcissist suffers a blow to his or her idealized, egotistical self-image (such as when being told he will not be given “exception to the rule”, or be granted “special treatment.
7. The narcissist is reminded of his or her charade, manipulation, exploitation, inadequacy, shame, or
self-loathing.
8. The narcissist feels (fears) not in control of their relational or physical surroundings.
In each of the cases above, narcissistic rage is utilized as a manipulative tool on the outside, and a pain-avoidance device on the inside. Like a spoiled child who throws a tantrum when not catered to, the narcissist attempts to use their “rage” to coerce their targets (victims) to give in. At the same time, the intense “drama” distracts the narcissist from the inner pain and inadequacy of not being constantly worshipped on a pedestal (narcissistic supply). The narcissist falls apart, psychologically and emotionally, at the prospect of not being “special," “unique," or “above others."
ETA This is from Psychology Today (not me
).