So I am being an absolute and utter hypocrite. My Friday night looks much like Alice - not much on the horizon except Tattle, a lovely hot bath and my favourite book. But I am not like this the majority of the time and have a good life and good friends - no partner, but hey, that is a work in progress. Given that, I have been tasked by one of my friends to complete a dating profile by close of day Saturday, for her to QA and make me post on Sunday. Given this, I was inspired to help Alice get her leg up on the dating scene
ROFLMAO
and post a realistic profile for Raya (no unknown riff raff only 'shlebs') Below is my first draft. Alice, you are very welcome.
Alice Evans,
48 49 50 51 52 53 54 years old. Single Hollywood Mom and famous person.
I am the most amazingly dedicated mother who has been cruelly left by my cheating husband. Even though I am between 50-80% bed bound, I am objectively a wonderfully charismatic and amazing woman - one of my therapists said to me today I cannot believe he chose his MOTHER, over the most incredible woman Ive ever met, AND his children(he is gay). I said I know. It goes very deep.
Some of my best qualities are my willingness to fight for the things that are important to me, like gas guzzlers parking in compact spots, teachers who do not agree with me and black people who don't listen to how I tell them to vote. I told my ex “ff you want to fight I will dedicate my LIFE to fighting you and I will WIN. I am not only the smartest person in the room, but I am also the person who has lost everybody. I have nothing left to lose. “. I think this shows how dedicated I am and how much tenacity I have.
Given the fact my ex has proven such a pussy, this is the way | plan to go. Holl.ywood hard core, who can help me get to where I want, who will ( and is already doing) praise my ideas instead of being horribly annoyed abs frustrated by them abs almost jealous and paranoid that you were not going to be able to provide me with what I wanted.
I am the funniest, kindest person you could ever wish to meet. Ask my fans and everyone on Twitter. And if they don’t agree with me, they are
bleeping trolls and I will abuse them because they deserve it. My 85,000 fans love me so much they raised $5000 for me on GFM.
So call me maybe. Because I am very in demand, I will be screening.