I’m so alone

[Makaraka]

I’m so alone
I feel like I have nobody to talk to
My husband has gone away until February time when he goes it’s like a light has gone off inside me.
I have two beautiful little girls who I adore and they keep me busy but come bedtime I just cry and cry.

I have a good few friends who try keep me busy but lockdown is just killing me inside

I can’t go on anymore

 

[Makaraka]

So many of you responding and giving advice
It’s so appreciated, more than you’ll ever know!
I’m going to make an appointment with my therapist and also just try explaining to my husband how I feel like I have here tonight

thank you
You’ve talked me off the ledge xxx

 

[heretoreaditall2019]

I’m so alone
I feel like I have nobody to talk to
My husband has gone away until February time when he goes it’s like a light has gone off inside me.
I have two beautiful little girls who I adore and they keep me busy but come bedtime I just cry and cry.

I have a good few friends who try keep me busy but lockdown is just killing me inside

I can’t go on anymore

my love the last sentence is very worrying, please call the Samaritans on 116 123 & check out resources here:

uk suicide resources - Google Search

 

[Onepotatotwopotato]

I’m so alone
I feel like I have nobody to talk to
My husband has gone away until February time when he goes it’s like a light has gone off inside me.
I have two beautiful little girls who I adore and they keep me busy but come bedtime I just cry and cry.

I have a good few friends who try keep me busy but lockdown is just killing me inside

I can’t go on anymore

Forget lockdown rules, invite a friend round as a support bubble, or you could do a pushchair walk, wishing you well

 

[Makaraka]

Hello you lovely lot!
Christmas Day is fast approaching. My best friend at work is on her own and we’ve decided to have Christmas Day together before we enter tier 4 on Boxing Day..

recently I’d said on the Hinch thread where I spend most of my time that I’d made the decision to not see my parents/grandparents to keep them safe and now with tier 4 happening i know I’ve made the right decision and I see my bestie everyday at work anyway and we have a support bubble going on!

so pros and cons. I’ve been feeling low and shit but tonight I suddenly had this burst of energy and life again.
I’m happy I’m healthy and have a happy and have a somewhat mostly healthy family!

Merry Christmas to you all, here’s to a hopefully happy and healthy and a much needed new year! I hope your all okay

 

[Makaraka]

@Makaraka i hope you’re feeling better !?

Hey.
I’m feeling quite good. I’ve been back at work so really busy with that and also I’ve had my girls off school as they had to isolate so I’ve had them here with me doing school work etc. Which I’ve loved!

So I’m feeling good at the moment, looking forward to getting back into the gym and having some me time this week.
I’m hoping that this Happy me can stay over Christmas but we’ll see!
X

 

[PurplePop20]

You are so brave for even writing how you feel. That is the hardest part. Would you consider phoning your GP tomorrow or looking at how to self-refer for talking therapies.
Also with your husband being away can you form a support bubble with someone? Even if they could watch the children for a short while itll give you a moment for self care.

 

[calmyourritas]

I’m so alone
I feel like I have nobody to talk to
My husband has gone away until February time when he goes it’s like a light has gone off inside me.
I have two beautiful little girls who I adore and they keep me busy but come bedtime I just cry and cry.

I have a good few friends who try keep me busy but lockdown is just killing me inside

I can’t go on anymore

I am sending so much love to you, your message has broke my heart. I am here to chat but please think of your little girls and get some professional help

 

[Makaraka]

Where is your husband? Is he available for you to talk to?

He’s in the Middle East. He’s in quarantine at the moment so we can kind of speak
But once he’s moved from quarantine it’s difficult.

it’s very a complicated situation.
He didn’t want to leave us and I begged him to stay but duty calls.

I just feel so sad and alone
My dad has PSTD so can’t speak to me about what I’m going through even though he would understand and my mum who is my childminder/support bubble seems to think that I’m dramatic even though she would understand how I feel if she just listened and didn’t dote on the grandkids!

I seem to be in a lone situation amongst my friends who think I’m being dramatic.
but it’s so hard to explain how alone and afraid I feel to anyone

sorry for rambling

 

[Makaraka]

thank you everyone!
I got up this morning feeling a lot better!
Took the girls to school and then went for a long run!

In the days I’m fine, I keep myself busy with house work and pottering around and during the summer months I’ll walk and do the garden. It’s the colder months and the evenings that I really struggle.

I need some good films, series and books! I love a podcast too. Just anything to keep my mind busy!

 

[Chardonnay]

I’m so alone
I feel like I have nobody to talk to
My husband has gone away until February time when he goes it’s like a light has gone off inside me.
I have two beautiful little girls who I adore and they keep me busy but come bedtime I just cry and cry.

I have a good few friends who try keep me busy but lockdown is just killing me inside

I can’t go on anymore

You can go on. You have to because those 2 little girls need their mummy, their whole world. Please reach out to someone and be honest with how you’re feeling, anyone. I promise you no one will turn you away. I’m so sorry you’re feeling low. It’s really shit times. But it’s just a moment in time. There will be brighter, better days ahead. I wish you all the very best.

 

[McNuggets]

My darling I am so very sorry to hear you are feeling like this.

Please can you keep talking to us?

 

[McNuggets]

Sometimes if I have had a particularly hard day at work and my husband is snoring like a plane going by I get into bed with one of my kiddies and it helps me fall asleep.

Can you do that? Without waking them of course, because then you will have another problem..

Thinking of you

 

[Makaraka]

So glad to hear this xx podcasts I love the receipts on Spotify & Katherine Ryan’s - both are very very funny.

The evenings are shit, I know this sounds silly but have you got any natural light bulbs? I love mine, they do help lift your mood a little x

Ooo I love a funny one! I like a true crime too but there doesn’t seem to be any that are taking my fancy at the moment!
last time he was away I binged the whole of my dad wrote a porno! So I’m glad that returns next year!

I haven’t got any natural light bulbs but I’ll look into them!
I struggle to sleep when he’s away but my colleague gave me a sleep aid vape thing so I’m going to give that a go.

thank you lovely people, I was just reading the comments about tattle being full of horrible bullies and it most certainly isn’t.

if anyone else is lonely and/or just wants a chat please feel free
it’s nice to have here to vent it’s made me feel better and I don’t like getting told off for going off topic on other threads x

 

[or JusRollWithIt]

Thanks to @heretoreaditall2019 above who shared those very important numbers.

It’s not an easy thing you are doing and completely understandable to feel alone. Husband away for a long time and you trying to hold the fort with your little ones in the middle of this crazy time when everything is just so strange. Kids are a blessing in that they keep us busy and distracted. But when it goes quiet and we are left alone, those are the hardest hours. I am sure you will get a lot of love and people here who care. Be gentle on yourself

 

[Makaraka]

@Makaraka I'm sorry you're feeling like this hun and I think you're so brave for speaking up about it. Glad to know you're feeling better too

I feel the same, lockdown has broke me and some days I feel like i can't go on anymore. My mental health is up and down like the weather and I feel like I have more bad days than good

I always remember though that it would be a lot worse if I werent here. My fella & my son would be lost without me & it would be the same for your little girls and your hubby

Being alone/feeling alone is the worst. Its not the same as you but my fella works 12 hour days and I never see my family & friends because they live far away from me. I feel so alone. I find messaging my friends just for ongoing conversation helps just so im busy and got someone to speak to.

If you want to just pm me through the day for shit convo please do. And anyone for that

Keep yourself busy, watch shit telly, go on Tattle to keep you entertained!

You matter in this world hope you're okay babe x

Thank you beautiful girl!

I think lockdown has just completely fucked me up! Again!
i used to be an avid tattler I loved it so much. I’m definitely finding my love for it again and remembering why with so many lovely people.

it’s 7.30pm though and I’ve not cried or screamed or felt too bad!
I think bottling it all up just made me explode so I’m glad I created this thread.

honestly you lovely lot have changed my perspective of things in less than 24 hours.

I love my little girls to absolute death and I just want to be the best mother to them I can and sometimes alone I know I’m not.

 

[Jac In The Box]

Hope you’re ok I too felt like this a few weeks ago, felt totally worthless & like everyone would be better off if I wasn’t here. Cut a long story short I’ve always been fiercely independent, worked 2 jobs then I was diagnosed with fibromyalgia & SAD. Felt as if my life was over, didn’t want to wake up everyday in pain & be reliant on other people, instead of talking to someone I bottled up my feelings & then went into meltdown I called nhs24 & hung up then plucked up the courage to call back, so glad I did. The mh team were amazing, I was referred to dbi & someone called me everyday to check in & spoke to me about strategies for dealing with things. I watch friends or a Disney movie because it’s a feel good thing for me & even though I’ve seen friends a million times I still lol everytime Please don’t be too tough on yourself & go look at they 2 beautiful babies of yours, remind yourself what an amazing woman you are to give life to them & share your life with themYou’ve done well reaching out so hang in there beautiful

 

[Holymotherofgod]

Hi there, I'm struggling a bit with loneliness during these lockdowns, it's the first time being an only child as an adult has affected me really bad, my 'friends' don't really check up on me and I always feel like I'm bothering them when I message first... I don't have any first cousins and my closest cousins have isolated me due to all being in relationships and I'm just out of one... I was wondering if anybody wanted to or could create a thread if anybody else wanted to chat about something similar?

 

[AC55]

@Makaraka I think you're very brave for sharing this all with us. Sometimes I think it's easier to talk to people outside of your family and friends isn't it because they can be more objective.
How are you feeling this morning? I don't have all the answers but I am going to say you really are not alone. Please please call your GP and tell them exactly what you are going through. There is also a wealth of support online and the Samaritans and SHOUT are always available to you.
This year has challenged all of us in many different ways and believe me I've sat and cried, wondering if it will ever be a normal life again. What you don't need is to be tortured and tormented by Sophie Hinchliffe because she is a very toxic individual. Take a break from her and concentrate on you and your children.
You will get through this, in your own time, with some help and support. All of your Tattle friends have offered a wealth of advice here and if you take one thing from it it's this: You are never alone.

Let us all know how you are today.

Lots of love from AC55 xxx

 

[petra23]

Hi there, I'm struggling a bit with loneliness during these lockdowns, it's the first time being an only child as an adult has affected me really bad, my 'friends' don't really check up on me and I always feel like I'm bothering them when I message first... I don't have any first cousins and my closest cousins have isolated me due to all being in relationships and I'm just out of one... I was wondering if anybody wanted to or could create a thread if anybody else wanted to chat about something similar?

I am in a similar position to you. It's horrible watching people together and having fun. It makes me want to cry! If you create a thread I'd like to know what people do to keep themselves busy. I have never been great at enjoying my own company