Harry and Meghan #32 Enough of your woke! By the end of the year you'll be broke!

[Campagne]

ive got a couple of free articles a week ; this is the intro; I’m going to read Scooby Doo’s interview with the Times

Finding Freedom: the mistrust behind Harry and Meghan’s departure

The mistrust, bitterness and resentment that led to the Duke and Duchess of Sussex leaving the country is revealed today in a book that lays bare the breakdown in relations between Harry and Meghan and the rest of the royal family.The infighting and the suspicion became so bad that when the couple b

www.thetimes.co.uk

The mistrust, bitterness and resentment that led to the Duke and Duchess of Sussex leaving the country is revealed today in a book that lays bare the breakdown in relations between Harry and Meghan and the rest of the royal family.

The infighting and the suspicion became so bad that when the couple believed they were being blocked from seeing the Queen they considered breaking protocol by springing a surprise visit on her to plead their case after they flew back from their Christmas break in Canada.

Senior courtiers in other households, the so-called men in grey suits, were intent on reining in the popularity of the duke and duchess, even as they were “propelling the monarchy to new heights around the world”, the booksays.


Finding Freedom, serialised in The Times and The Sunday Times this weekend, goes so far as to claim that the royal “establishment” feared that Harry and Meghan’s popularity “might eclipse that of the royal family itself”.
The book, by Omid Scobie and Carolyn Durand, tells how Harry and Meghan’s relationship with the Cambridges reached such frostiness that at their final engagement in March, the Commonwealth service at Westminster Abbey, the two couples barely spoke even though they had not seen each other since January. “Although Meghan tried to make eye contact with Kate, the duchess barely acknowledged her,” the authors write.


In an interview with The Times, Scobie said: “To purposefully snub your sister-in-law . . . I don’t think it left a great taste in the couple’s mouths.”

The book is the most revealing account to date of what Harry and Meghan were thinking as they made their decision to step away from the royal family and live in California.

It describes how, in the early days of their marriage, they had “liked being in control of their narrative”. However, when they split their household from that of the Duke and Duchess of Cambridge and were told to operate under the umbrella of Buckingham Palace, it was “a big disappointment to them”.


The authors write: “As their popularity had grown, so did Harry and Meghan’s difficulty in understanding why so few inside the Palace were looking out for their interests. They were a major draw for the royal family.” Instead they had to take a back seat. Sometimes they would be told that their projects had to wait when the Prince of Wales or Prince William had an initiative or tour being announced at the same time.

They felt that their complaints got nowhere, and believed that other households leaked stories to the press. “There were just a handful of people working at the Palace they could trust . . . A friend of the couple’s referred to the old guard as ‘the vipers’. Meanwhile, a frustrated Palace staffer described the Sussexes’ team as ‘the squeaky third wheel’ of the Palace.”

There were hurt feelings on both sides of the family. The authors say that Harry and Meghan’s decision to keep everyone in the dark about their website “created a lot of ill will in the household and especially in the family”.

In Harry’s view, some of the obstructiveness by household staff was fuelled by antipathy towards his wife. According to one source, Harry felt that some of the old guard at the Palace “simply didn’t like Meghan and would stop at nothing to make her life difficult”.

Scobie says it was hard for her as a mixed-race American to join the family. “That was going to ruffle feathers.” He hints at racist attitudes in the household. “I would say that there are certainly individuals there who may like to take a look at how they view the world.”

Before leaving to spend six weeks in Canada at the end of last year, Harry spoke to Charles and the Queen about the need to change things. “He felt at once used for their popularity, hounded by the press because of the public’s fascination with this new breed of royal couple, and disparaged back within the institution’s walls.”

Once they were out of the country, they decided to step back as senior royals. However, when Harry tried to fix a meeting with the Queen at the beginning of January, he was told she was not available until the end of the month. As the couple flew home, “Harry and Meghan toyed with the idea of driving straight from the terminal to see the Queen”. However they decided not to, because it would have “ruffled feathers” and caused problems for them. Once back in England, they pressed ahead to reach a speedy agreement. “At this point they felt like they had brought up the subject enough times with family members over the past year and they were fed up of not being taken seriously,” a source close to the couple said. The Sussexes, who Scobie says are unlikely to return to the fold in Britain, felt “patronised” by the family and its staff.

For their part the Cambridges, according to a Kensington Palace source, were upset that family matters had been made public by Harry and Meghan. “It’s not anger,” the source said. “It’s hurt.” Scobie says that William remains angry at how their announcement was released on Instagram. Lockdown had “slowed down” any healing.

According to a source in the book, “the courtiers blame Meghan, and some family do”. However, as Meghan “tearfully” told a friend before they left for good: “I gave up my entire life for this family. I was willing to do whatever it takes. But here we are. It’s very sad.”

A spokesman for the Sussexes said: “The Duke and Duchess of Sussex were not interviewed and did not contribute to Finding Freedom.” Buckingham Palace declined to comment.

 

[Wightgirl]

DM comment “They should have titled the book “When Needy met Greedy”

 

[Margot1977]

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-53535221
Might have been posted before, only just catching up
No way they haven't had anything to do with the book...somebody close to them fed plasticine Scobie some details, and knowing what a control freak M is, I have no doubt about the provenance of the info...
I used to feel sorry for H. He had it all...and threw it all away for what?

 

[Wightgirl]

Quick tally of DM comments about them today - over 17,000 and it’s hard to find a positive one!

 

[Campagne]

Scooby Doo’s interview with the Times.
He obviously wants to upstage Andrew Morton, hence knocking 6 years off his age.


https://www.thetimes.co.uk/article/...urand-meghan-markle-finding-freedom-k77lsclgn

Andrew Morton was nearly 40 when in 1992 he wrote Diana: Her True Story, the book that revealed the Prince of Wales to be an adulterer and his wife an unhappy bulimic who had attempted suicide. Omid Scobie, the royal editor of Harper’s Bazaar, has just turned 33 and with his co-author, an American television journalist called Carolyn Durand, is about to publish a biography that rivals it.

Finding Freedom: Harry and Meghan and the Making of a Modern Royal Family is a detailed account of the past four years of the life of Charles and Diana’s second son and his, as the authors would have it, much traduced wife, Meghan. These were, of course, years that some might say came nearer to breaking than making the House of Windsor.


The authors’ inspirations, says Scobie when I meet this well-groomed young man for coffee in a non-royal London park, are weighty American political biographies. Everything in the book has at least two sources: not for it the unchecked tittle-tattle of courtiers with an axe to grind. “It’s not all from Harry and Meghan’s perspective, but I do think that for the first time we do actually get to hear what’s been going on in their minds,” he says. It is a big claim, and it prompts a question. Morton was vilified until The Sunday Times discovered that his book had an impeccable source: the Princess of Wales herself.
Are Scobie and Durand’s ultimate sources the Sussexes? Press rivals, after all, refer to an “authorised biography” and The Mail on Sunday has claimed that the couple granted the authors an interview before they left for their self-imposed exile in north America.
So did Omid and Carolyn have a sit-down with Harry and Meghan? “The book doesn’t claim to have any interviews with Harry and Meghan. And nor do we,” Scobie says. But did they have them? “I don’t claim to have interviews with them.”


But did he have them? “There are no interviews with Harry and Meghan.”

Was there, perhaps, an off-the-record talk? “You’ve read the book. There’s no on-the-record interviews with the couple.”

Was there an off-the-record discussion with them? “No,” he says more quietly, “and I think that you can tell from the reporting, my time around the couple is enough for me to know my subjects.”

The couple have not read a proof. Indeed when later I talk to Durand she says she is not sure whether the Sussexes will read the book when it is published next month: “If they choose not to then I certainly understand.”

Durand, who worked for ABC News in London and knew Scobie from royal events and as a contributor to the chat show Good Morning America, approached him about writing a book two years ago at the time of the couple’s wedding. The ceremony was a public relations success but the run-up, largely owing to Meghan’s father’s press appearances and no-show at the service, was redtop frenzy.

Scobie and Durand planned to “correct the record” and, they say, focus on the couple’s charities and campaigns: his championing of mental welfare and the Invictus Games; her advocacy of female empowerment. They are convinced that their subjects are forces for good.


It may no longer be the consensus view. In Britain, Scobie, long identified as a cheerleader for the duchess, says things have sometimes become so ugly online that he has called the police. Even before anyone has read the book, there have been attempts to discredit it. It has been claimed that it paints Prince William as the “bad guy” (it doesn’t), that, for unspecified reasons, it had to be redrafted (it wasn’t) and that Amazon has “slashed” its price (standard big bookseller practice for a lead title).

Scobie is convinced that courtiers hostile to the couple have been hard at work. “I’ve been in this game long enough to know who some of these people are. Does it surprise me? No. Does it disappoint me? A little.”

What Scobie has experienced is, he suggests, nothing to what the Sussexes have endured, not just from journalists and social media but the royal palaces themselves. The House of Windsor has many mansions, and each pursues its own agenda.

“You’ve got Clarence House, Kensington Palace, Buckingham Palace, and the different offices within Buckingham Palace. They’re very loyal to their principals but that often means throwing others under the bus. Let’s say, for example, hypothetically, a negative story about Prince Charles is about to run in the papers. Well, perhaps someone working for Charles might throw a nugget about the Cambridges or another member of the royal family, to keep that story out of the press. There’s a lot of bargaining that goes on behind the scenes. I do think that Harry and Meghan have been victims of that.”

For the leakers it is a risk-free game as the royal family traditionally does not comment on or complain about press reports. Harry and Meghan believed they should respond, but were told to “fall in line”. When people question the “freedom” in his book’s title, Scobie points to the moment when, after their departure to America was announced in March, President Trump tweeted that the US would not pay for their security. Harry and Meghan immediately responded that privately funded security arrangements had been made. “For them it was like, ‘Wow, OK, this is what it feels like when you’re in control.’”

So what, exactly, is Meghan supposed to have done wrong? “I think existing, in some cases. I think royal women have it really tough. You go in and you play the game or you lose, and I think she went in and she didn’t want to play the game and she was married to someone who said, ‘We’re not going to play the game.’ A lot of people try to say that Meghan has taken the reins and has convinced Harry that his family is horrendous but actually it is Harry who has found someone who’s emboldened him to find that courage to take a step outside of the bubble that he grew up in.”

Can this really be all there is to the hostility, however? There was plenty of gossip that once Meghan became a princess she turned into a Red Queen demanding courtiers’ heads. The rumours began in November 2018 when Melissa Toubati, the couple’s assistant, “quit” six months into the job after allegedly being reduced to tears by her boss. “That’s so not what happened,” Scobie says, although for legal reasons he cannot say what did happen.

And what of the night nurse for the Sussexes’ newborn? She did not survive her second night with Archie before being “let go” for “unprofessional and irresponsible” conduct. Scobie tells me what that was. If true, I would have “let her go” too.

The authors’ contention is that “Duchess Difficult”, as Meghan supposedly became known, was simply “Duchess Different”. If Charles emailed staff at 5am he would be praised for his assiduity, but she was American and female. There were things going against Meghan from the start. Unlike Kate Middleton, she was old enough to have had a life, a high-profile career as an actress and, indeed, a divorce before meeting her prince.

“I think that was ripe for exploitation by certain tabloids in the way that they do with any public figure these days, but particularly women. And royal women! I mean, they’re probably treated the worst of the lot.”

And a black woman? “Absolutely. She was a biracial woman stepping into the House of Windsor. That was going to ruffle feathers. We only need look at the Duchess Difficult narrative. What is ‘difficult’? Difficult is pushy, aggressive. It’s all the things that we throw on black women as a society regardless of what their actual personality is.”

Scobie speaks with personal feeling. He is the British-born son of a Scottish father who runs a marketing agency, and an Iranian mother who works as a child-welfare professional. He left his first job at Heat magazine after an executive called him a “Paki” in emails. A member of staff at Buckingham Palace once said that he was “surprised” to hear Scobie, who went to a public school, speak with received pronunciation.

“I can understand how difficult it must be for a mixed-race American woman to step into that household and be treated as an equal, in an institution which lives by hierarchy.”

Is he saying the household is racist? “No, I’m not. I’m saying that I have had experience myself from one particular household member.”

Does he think racism fed into how she was treated by the household? “I would say that there are certainly individuals there who may like to take a look at how they view the world.”


Durand, who worked for ABC News in London, approached Scobie about writing a book two years ago
The book dates the rift between Harry and William to the day the older brother asked if he was sure Meghan was The One. “I only have my own perspective on this and the perspective of those that we’ve spoken to, but it seems that William genuinely wanted to make sure that his brother was making the right decision. That said, I’m not sure if Meghan was welcomed with as wide arms as perhaps [former girlfriends] Cressida [Bonas] or Chelsy [Davy] would have been. I think that’s perhaps because she was older and she came with a history and . . . I think coming from, being American”.

Unconscious bias? “I certainly wouldn’t want to suggest that.”

The “optics” of the family’s final public appearance at the Westminster Abbey Commonwealth service in March were terrible. “To purposefully snub your sister-in-law or your brother or brother-in-law in Kate’s case . . . I don’t think it left a great taste in the couple’s mouths.” The explanation, he says, is that William was (and remains) angry at the Sussexes’ unilateral announcement on Instagram in January that they were stepping back as senior members of the royal family. The lockdown that has stranded them on opposite sides of the Atlantic has “slowed” any healing.

Yet, over a private lunch in March between, as an aide put it, “granny and grandson”, the Queen made it clear that Harry and Meghan could return at any time? “But will Harry and Meghan be in a place where they’ll want to come back? I very much doubt it because I think everything is going to plan for them in terms of the new chapter that they’ve begun.”

So he doesn’t predict another royal divorce trundling down the line? “I can’t see that, no. If anything, I think having weathered this storm they’re stronger than ever. I think they’ve got battles up ahead. I think what they’re trying to do with this situation with the press you know, he’s taking on The Sun [and the Mirror over alleged phone hacking] and she has this case with Associated Papers [over a breach of privacy] that’s going to be really testing for them.”

People, I gently suggest, will say that Scobie has fallen in love with the duchess.

“That’s definitely something I’ve seen a lot of online and in certain newspaper commentary. I certainly connect to this story in a way that makes it more meaningful to me. I’m a biracial royal correspondent. There aren’t many of us.”

In the evening I phone Durand in Connecticut, where she is sitting out coronavirus. She is an American but after 18 years working in London turns out to be a far sterner royalist than her British co-author. We almost come to verbal blows when I accuse Meghan of materialism. The book is full of designer labels!

“Excuse me?”

The book keeps name-checking designer labels (perhaps, on reflection, a consequence of its obsessive attention to detail). “Well, I think there are all sorts of British people that wear designer labels. I think that actually she’s been quite keen in many of her fashion choices to pick sustainable labels.”

But when she goes off to Manhattan, to meet her friends, the first thing they do is go shopping! “I don’t think she does go off to America and the first thing she does is shopping. I don’t think we say that in the book either.”


(The book says that in the final trimester of her pregnancy Meghan went to New York and “looked forward to five nights of shopping and good food with some of her closest and most loyal friends” and that on the first day in the city she bought “baby clothes at the Fancy French children’s store Bonpoint”.)

Was Meghan’s joining the royal family always doomed to failure? “I don’t consider this a failure. I think that members of the royal family and Harry and Meghan are trying to create a situation that’s going to work best for them. I wouldn’t say that they’re doomed to failure. I’m not sure that that’s accurate. I think in five years or ten years we can maybe make a more accurate judgment on where things stand and if this is the right thing for Harry and Meghan and the right thing for the royal family.”

From a family perspective and from a royal perspective, I say, we have lost an extremely likeable, active and socially conscious prince to America. Two brothers who were close are close no more and Harry no longer performs royal duties. It’s not a success story from that point of view, is it?

“Obviously this has just happened. We’re just three or four months in and with Covid it’s not a normal situation. We’re not able to see what Harry and Meghan intend to do in the future. However, they remain the president and the vice-president of the Queen’s Commonwealth Trust and they’ve said that they’re committed to upholding the ideals of the Queen.”

This, I think, is an unusual instance of an author underselling her potential bestseller. The rupture is what makes the Harry and Meghan story so sad, and so compelling.


In contrast, Durand’s collaborator is in no doubt about what their book has anatomised.

“I think the timing of this book has worked out really well because we’ve been able to follow what has been a momentous, seismic moment for the royal family,” Scobie says.

“This couple that married with so much hope and so much to offer was somewhat failed by the institution and is now doing its own thing, and doing it well and thriving.

“Unfortunately, I feel like it’s the royal family that lost, because the Sussexes as a couple and Meghan as an individual represented a level of modernity that we hadn’t seen in the House of Windsor before. She did represent inclusion. She was representative of a different demographic. That doesn’t exist any more.”

 

[LadyMuck]

Can't wait to see Murky Meg, Taz and Yankee Wally's take on it!

 

[NotDumbNotBlonde]

Can't wait to see Murky Meg, Taz and Yankee Wally's take on it!

And Lady C!

 

[WallacesDog]

So it's much like we all suspected...... Haznoballs is an arrogant dimwit manipulated by his narcissic wife who thought she was starring in 'Pretty Woman 2' mixed with 'The Princess Diaries'

The obvious jealousy of William and Kate and their grandiose self importance is unbelievable.

I fear that Harry is too stupid to realise what he has done. He disgusts me and I hope he never comes back (even if he gets rid of the witch).

Scooby has scored an own goal here, the book will only be lapped up by the sugar nuts but their general popularity will nose dive. Not long until Megs ghosts him then.

He's described Harry as a self important idiot whilst Meghan is being portrayed as the one who gave up everything for love How terrible for her to marry a man with loads of money and live in a palace my heart bleeds NOT

Absolutely spot on Scotch!
Exactly, that boiled my waters; gave up everything?!
So much to give up! She was a 2 bit 'actress' hardly anyone had heard of, a (twice?) divorcee living in rented, playing at being a 'lifestyle' influencer and allegedly making ends meet via yachts .

 

[Norbs]

DM comment “They should have titled the book “When Needy met Greedy”

Do we have the next thread title right there?

Harry and Meghan #33 When Needy met Greedy.

 

[NineTails20]

Good lord. All I can think of while reading that excerpt is that it reminds me of the last American divorceé that rocked up and into the Royal Family. The more things change.......

 

[antinoos]

Its really not the case that the extract is also critical of the dismal duo. What apparently negative comments are there, fall into the "My worst fault is that I'm just too kind" category and have clearly been crowbarred in (no doubt against enormous opposition from the books sole female editor) in the pathetic belief they confer some sense of even handedness.

Aunty cannot recall a more disastrously mishandled PR campaign nor a worst example of the celebrity memoire. Can anyone else? The levels of stupidity, delusion and tone deafness that have informed the whole debacle are the real story. There is actually nothing otherwise truly interesting about the pair of prize bastards; and when you think about it, this is all theyve really got and theyve blown it. A boring, badly written, melange of entitled unconvincing treacherous self-indulgent whinges.

They are going to be hated.

Do we have the next thread title right there?

Harry and Meghan #33 When Needy met Greedy.

Needy, Seedy, Weedy and Greedy

Good lord. All I can think of while reading that excerpt is that it reminds me of the last American divorceé that rocked up and into the Royal Family. The more things change.......

Except she had elegance, class and wit; the Nazi bit wasnt great but Wallis was in a different league to Meghan and it genuinely did ruin her life, and she didnt want it, and she stuck loyally by him without ever betraying a confidence until the very bitter end.

 

[Wightgirl]

Pahahaha..... 33 my arse

 

[Despicableme]

DM comment “They should have titled the book “When Needy met Greedy”

Proper laughed at that!

Next thread title

 

[catp]

Loving Needy and Greedy! Sums those two up perfectly

 

[antinoos]

Also the interview with ageing celebrity lesbian impersonator Omid Scobie is very revealing. Men who lie about their age are usually up to no good. We ladies have our own reasons. Aunty is 25 and as evryone knows hot.

He's just another professional race baiter. Prejudice against Iranians as a race is virtually non-existent except in the middle-east. Personally I'm bloody sick of it. There is racial injustice, a lot of it within racial groups; but this society by any measure is not the Jim Crow American deep south; and to try and normalise the narrative that the House of Windsor is a racist institution is wicked and ahistorical. Imaginative racial tolerance is a hallmark of the British Royal Family who basically see themselves as above race. Think Victoria and the Munshi etc etc.

 

[Invisiblewriter]

Here you go:

As the Range Rover pulled up the driveway to Sandringham House, Harry was nervous. The estate, where the Queen was in residence and so many Christmas memories had been made, was now the setting for the most important meeting of his royal life.

It was also the hardest. He found himself more at odds with his family than ever. It wasn’t an easy decision to stand up to the age-old rules of the monarchy, but for Harry, this was his only option in “making things right for his own little family”, a source close to the couple said. “This is tearing him apart. He loves the Queen, but his wife feels aggrieved, and he adores his son. Harry’s whole world is Archie.”

Harry was facing the Queen, Charles, and William for the first time since he and Meghan had released their full plans to step away from their official roles in the royal family to the world. (Although Prince Philip had been expected to participate in the meeting, he left for his farmhouse located on the estate shortly before discussions got under way.)

In the days since Harry and Meghan launched their website, sussexroyal.com, Buckingham Palace’s dismay had turned to resolve in repairing the situation and moving on as quickly as possible. While the hybrid model of royalty that Harry and Meghan suggested posed a huge challenge that few thought could be overcome, one source said: “The drama and division is doing the most damage.”

Prior to the meeting, aides had assured Harry that the Queen wanted to help the Sussexes find a resolution, even if they might not get everything they wanted. Despite the reassurances, Harry wasn’t sure who to believe any more.

Since getting married, Harry and Meghan had enjoyed calling their own shots. “Harry and Meghan liked being in control of their narrative,” a source said, which is why originally agreeing to fold their household into Buckingham Palace, instead of creating their own independent court, had proved a big disappointment to them.

Harry and Meghan had wanted to create their own individual household in Windsor, meaning their own office staffed with their own team, who would be separate from all others. But senior officials quickly ruled out that option.
The senior courtiers whom Diana used to refer to as “men in grey suits” were concerned that the global interest in and popularity of the Sussexes needed to be reined in. In the short time since their fairytale wedding, Harry and Meghan were already propelling the monarchy to new heights around the world.

As their popularity had grown, so did Harry and Meghan’s difficulty in understanding why so few inside the palace were looking out for their interests. They were a major draw for the royal family. According to a press reports that compared the online popularity of the Sussexes with the Cambridges from November 2017 to January 2020, “Harry-and-Meghan-related searches accounted for 83 per cent of the world’s curiosity in the two couples”.

The Sussexes had made the monarchy more relatable to those who had never before felt a connection. However, there were concerns that the couple should be brought into the fold; otherwise the establishment feared their popularity might eclipse that of the royal family.
Increasingly Harry had grown frustrated that he and Meghan often took a back seat to other family members. While they both respected the hierarchy of the institution, it was difficult when they wanted to focus on a project and were told that a more senior ranking family member, be it Prince William or Prince Charles, had an initiative or tour being announced at the same time — so they would just have to wait.

For months the couple tried to air these frustrations, but the conversations didn’t lead anywhere. Worse, there were just a handful of people working at the palace they could trust. Outside this core team, no information was safe. A friend of the couple’s referred to the old guard as “the vipers”. Meanwhile, an equally frustrated palace staffer described the Sussexes’ team as “the squeaky third wheel” of the palace.
Highly emotional and fiercely protective of his wife and son, Harry was drained by the unique circumstances of his family, which, as a source described, “doesn’t have the opportunity to operate as an actual family”. While politics are part of every family dynamic, they are at a whole other level for William, Harry, and the rest of the royals. “Every conversation, every issue, every personal disagreement, whatever it may be, involves staff,” the source said of the aides who invariably send and receive messages between the royal households. “It creates a really weird environment that actually doesn’t allow people to sort things out themselves.”

No one could deny the fact that the couple were emotionally exhausted, whether they had brought it on themselves or were victims of a merciless machine. “They felt under pressure,” a source said. “They felt that they were alone.”

For Harry especially, it was all getting to be too much. “Doesn’t the Queen deserve better?” screamed one newspaper headline, which the prince read online. “These people are just paid trolls,” he later told a friend. “Nothing but trolls . . . and it’s disgusting.”

Scrolling on his iPhone, he sometimes couldn’t stop himself from reading the comments on the articles.

“H&M disgust me.”

“They are a disgrace to the royal family.”

“The world would be a better place without Harry and Meghan in it.”

The last comment had over 3,500 upvotes. Harry regretted opening the link. His stomach tied into the same knot every time he saw these sorts of comment. “It’s a sick part of the society we live in today, and no one is doing anything about it,” he continued. “Where’s the positivity? Why is everyone so miserable and angry?”

It wasn’t just the press or online trolls getting to Harry. It was also the institution of the monarchy. Barely a week went by without an aspect of their internal affairs or matters of private discussions being twisted and leaked to the press. They felt as though there were very few members of the palace staff they could trust. Harry’s relationship with William, which had been strained for a while, was getting worse.

As the autumn had worn on and tensions with certain sections of the palace grew, Harry and Meghan decided they needed to get out of the country for a while. Christmas was right around the corner, and spending it at Sandringham surrounded by members of the royal family did not sound like a holiday.

The couple decided that for the second half of November and all of December they would base themselves in Canada. They headed for an $18 million Vancouver Island estate that their friend Ben Mulroney helped secure through the music producer David Foster. Foster was close friends with the wealthy investor who had put the property up for sale and was willing to let it to the couple for far below market value.

With two private beaches on four acres of land, it provided a haven for the shell-shocked couple. Meghan’s mother, Doria, visited for the Thanksgiving holiday.

Away from the courtiers and all things royal, they could think for themselves. They went over the events since the wedding and talked about how and if they could create a situation that would make for a better future. “I don’t need to have that movie moment where we get out of a car and wave to a hundred photographers before going into a building,” Harry told a friend. “It should just be about the work happening inside. Let’s focus on what really matters.”

Before leaving the UK, Harry had spoken a handful of times to his grandmother and father and a number of key aides about the urgent need to change things for him and his wife within the palace structure. He felt at once used for their popularity, hounded by the press because of the public’s fascination with this new breed of royal couple, and disparaged back within the institution’s walls for being too sensitive and outspoken. He and Meghan didn’t want to walk away from the monarchy; rather, they wanted to find a happy place within it.

But as the weeks went by, the couple had realised they couldn’t go back to the way things had been at home. As hard as the decision was to make, they came to a conclusion: Harry and Meghan were going to step back from their roles as senior royals — and cut themselves off from access to the sovereign grant.

Despite the change, they still wanted to carry out their duties for the Queen. That was the one thing that they did not want to end — not just because of Harry’s love and respect for his grandmother, but also because Meghan felt she had given up so much to take her life down a path of service to the monarchy. She didn’t quit when she signed up for a task.

They knew there would be hurdles, such as discussions over the security that was provided by the Metropolitan Police for “internationally protected people”. But they were confident enough that before Christmas, Harry emailed his grandmother and father to say that he and Meghan had come to the decision to change the way they worked — to step back and spend more time abroad. He didn’t get into much more detail, worried that the news might leak via a member of staff. The rest, he said, they would discuss in person.

With both family members informed, Charles’s private office was requested to schedule a time for the two to meet the Queen, who was based at Sandringham for the holiday, as soon as the Sussexes returned to the UK on January 6. Their trip to London was going to be short, but Harry was keen to ensure that by the time they returned to Canada at the end of the week, their new chapter had been secured.

Harry was right to be worried about leaks. Details from the email soon ended up in the hands of a tabloid reporter who began inquiring about the couple’s plans to spend more time in Canada. But that was the least of his worries. Despite repeated follow-ups with his father’s office, he was unable to secure time with the Queen. She would not be available, he was told, until January 29. “He felt like he was being blocked,” a source close to the prince said.

As their Air Canada flight made its early morning touchdown at Heathrow, and still with no appointment to see Her Majesty, Harry and Meghan toyed with the idea of driving straight to see the Queen. Not wanting to cause problems for themselves (arriving unannounced would have ruffled feathers), the couple instead called for a team meeting at their home, Frogmore Cottage. With senior aides Harry and Meghan revealed details of their plans to the team. Whether their speedy approach was right or not, Harry and Meghan were more determined than ever. “At this point they felt like they had brought up the subject enough times with family members over the past year and they were fed up of not being taken seriously,” a source close to the couple said. “Everyone had their chance to help but no one did.”

Few things remain secret between royal households and it didn’t take long after Harry’s initial email for the Sussexes’ grand plans to be the topic of conversation among most of the aides and family members. Worried about losing control of the situation, Harry contacted his grandmother to explain his concerns, and she signed off on putting together a jointly agreed statement. The couple hesitated about involving the other households, not knowing if everyone involved would have their best intentions, but agreed for aides to meet up the next day and get on the same page.

With a plan in place, Harry and Meghan put on big smiles the following day as they chatted to dignitaries at an engagement with the high commissioner of Canada to the UK. But privately they were both nervous about what was about to happen. They had seen a draft of what Buckingham Palace planned to put out in a statement that would follow theirs and its “lack of warmth” was a clear sign that not everyone supported their decision.

But there was little time to dwell. Just a few hours after leaving Canada House, a story about their plans to stay in Canada broke. Details were missing, but it was clear that someone within the palace had briefed the newspaper. A royal source absolutely denied the charge, blaming the couple for the leak, “because they were frustrated at the palace in the talks that were going on . . . They wanted to force the decision, to break it open.” The couple deny this claim.

With the news out and media organisations contacting the palace for comment, a statement needed to be issued fast. On January 8, the couple took to Instagram to share their news with the world. Alongside their announcement, they launched sussexroyal.com, which was no longer a landing page for their new foundation but a road map of the “new working model” they hoped to espouse. It offered clarity on their decision to be financially independent, which was not only to have more freedom in their work but also to remove the tabloids’ justification in having access to their lives.

The website took everyone, even their communications team, by surprise. Aides and family members knew the couple wanted to step back, but the website, which laid out the details of their half-in-half-out model as if it were a done deal, put the Queen in a difficult position.

Flustered Buckingham Palace aides ditched their original statement and put out a short media release 15 minutes after the Sussexes released theirs: “Discussions with the Duke and Duchess of Sussex are at an early stage. We understand their desire to take a different approach, but these are complicated issues that will take time to work through.”

The aides, including the Queen’s private secretary, Edward Young, were furious. “The private offices don’t like that type of behaviour,” a source familiar with the negotiations said. “It is deeply unhealthy and unwelcome.”

More unsettling, however, was the reaction from the family to the website they had launched. “The element of surprise, the blindsiding of the Queen, for the other principals who are all very mindful of this, rightfully, it was deeply upsetting” according to a senior member of the household. Several in the family shared that both the Queen and Prince Philip were “devastated”.

“The family is very private and bringing it into the public domain, when they were told not to, hurt the Queen,” the source continued. “It was laying out what the Sussexes wanted in a statement without consulting with Her Majesty first — and she’s the head of the institution.”

The palace scrambled to figure out if all of the requirements in the couple’s manifesto could even work logistically, including having the “future financial autonomy to work externally”. This was very different from the simple idea of spending more time abroad that had originally been presented. There were security and funding issues, tax implications, and visas. How could they legally take on commercial endeavours and still represent the Queen? “It was a huge headache,” an exasperated aide said.

Even a source close to the couple admitted that while Harry and Meghan had put a lot of thought into this immense transition, they could also be “impatient and impulsive”. “They run hot, in a way,” the source said. “The reactions in individual moments are definitely not the same, a month, a few weeks, down the line.”

Despite her sadness at the thought of losing the Sussexes as working royals, the Queen could see it was necessary for the couple to completely separate from the institution. No one should be forced into something they don’t want to do. But if Harry thought that their public proposal would result in their getting exactly what they wanted “he was sorely mistaken”, a senior courtier said. “The Queen understood the difficulties they faced, but the rules don’t bend for anyone.” Buckingham Palace issued a statement stating that a solution to Harry and Meghan’s requests would be reached “within days, not weeks”.

After three days of discussions between the royal households and government officials, including the Canadian government, the Queen requested that Harry travel up to Sandringham to meet her, Charles and William.

At the “Sandringham summit”, the four of them would sort out the future once and for all.

What a source described as a “practical workmanlike approach” permeated the room as the royals set out to form a deal. Harry felt as though he and Meghan had long been sidelined by the institution and were not a fundamental part of its future.

One didn’t have to look further than the family photos displayed during the Queen’s Speech on Christmas Day. In the Green Drawing Room at Buckingham Palace, where the Queen delivered her address, viewers glimpsed photos of the Cambridges and their children, Charles and Camilla, Prince Philip, and a black-and-white image of George VI. Noticeably absent was a photo of Harry, Meghan, and their new baby, Archie. Palace sources insisted that the photos were chosen to represent the direct line of succession, but for Harry and Meghan, it had been yet another sign that they needed to consider their own path.

Charles made it clear to Harry that he and Meghan were very much part of the future for the royal family despite calls for a “slimmed-down monarchy” with fewer senior working royals. “The Prince of Wales’s vision always included Harry as part of a slimmed down monarchy,” a source close to the family shared. “His vision included both his sons. William will always be more important than Harry but that’s a fact only because of birthright.”

Though William had not taken the original news of his brother’s plan well, his fate was up to the Queen, and she was very aware that the outcome of the meeting would set the standard for generations to come.

Finally, she made it clear that their quasi-royal vision would not work. “It was untenable,” a palace source said. “If Harry and Meghan had been semi-working royals, there would have had to have been oversight in everything they did in their independent sphere, a committee to approve events and deals.”

When the meeting was over, Harry immediately debriefed Sussex aides before sending a text to Meghan. That evening, the Queen put out a candid and personal statement. “My family and I are entirely supportive of Harry and Meghan’s desire to create a new life as a young family,” the statement read. “Although we would have preferred them to remain full-time working members of the royal family, we respect and understand their wish to live a more independent life as a family while remaining a valued part of my family.”

The official communication also announced that Harry and Meghan no longer wanted to rely on public money during the coming period of transition, during which time the couple would live in both Canada and the UK. “These are complex matters for my family to resolve, and there is some more work to be done,” the Queen stated, “but I have asked for final decisions to be reached in the coming days.”

“More work” was an understatement. Harry spent the next several days holed up in intense meetings and conference calls with top aides from all three royal households, Buckingham Palace, Clarence House, and Kensington Palace, which were led by Charles’s private secretary, Clive Alderton. William was more than happy to leave the matter up to staff. He was reported to have told a friend: “I’ve put my arm around my brother all our lives and I can’t do that anymore; we’re separate entities.”

That held true for Meghan and Kate as well. The two duchesses’ relationship had struggled to move past the distant politeness of when they first met. Their cordial but distant rapport was apparent when the pair appeared alongside each other at the King Power Royal Charity Polo Day the previous summer. While the doting mothers were photographed next to each other with their children, the two appeared to barely exchange a word.

The state of affairs between the two women was just an offshoot of the real issue at hand: the conflict between Harry and the institution. Harry likened his meetings throughout the week to standing in front of a firing squad. “There was a lot of finger pointing in both directions with things leaking,” an aide said. “It was all very unhealthy.”

When Harry described how he didn’t feel supported by his family, this was what he was referring to. They did their bit in the family meeting at Sandringham, and then they left him to defend himself against and negotiate with their aides, which is exactly what he didn’t want to happen. “He feels that there were so many occasions when the institution and his family could have helped them, stood up for them, backed them up, and never did,” a source said.

Courtiers viewed Harry’s position as completely unrealistic. While it was easy to say they wouldn’t take money from the sovereign grant, it was quite another thing to follow through. “The biggest row was over money, because it always is,” a source familiar with the negotiations said. One aide made a joke about Meghan launching a line of beauty products.

More accurately, the couple hoped to earn a living through speaking engagements, production deals, and other commercial deals that had social impact. Still, there were some difficult calculations to be made. If Harry and Meghan did some official work, they would have to figure out how much of their expenses were private rather than subject to tax relief. “They’ve created a complete headache for everyone,” an exhausted aide complained on the fifth day of meetings.

More difficult were the hurt feelings on both sides. Even sources close to Harry and Meghan had to admit that the way the couple were forced to approach the situation (mainly in the act of keeping the family and their team in the dark about their website) “created a lot of ill will in the household and especially in the family”.

“Harry and Meghan would have reached a more beneficial agreement to allow them to live the life they wanted if they had handled things in a private, dignified way,” a senior Buckingham Palace aide explained. Another courtier added: “They oversimplified what they were asking for. They thought they’d give Charles their rider, negotiate over email, rock up to London, give three months’ notice and fly back to Canada.”

Harry and Meghan, however, felt that they had been patronised by other family and staff members for too long. People had humoured them when they brought up grievances, never thinking the couple would actually do anything drastic. The explosive reaction was a direct result of their growing impatience. If other members of the family and those working with the households had taken their requests more seriously, it wouldn’t have reached that point.

Either way, the source said: “The courtiers blame Meghan, and some family do.”

The media speculated that Meghan was behind the decision for the couple to step back, but few knew how much she sacrificed to try to make it work. As Meghan tearfully told a friend in March: “I gave up my entire life for this family. I was willing to do whatever it takes. But here we are. It’s very sad.”

While the British media often blamed royal wives, in Harry’s case, he was very much on board with distancing himself from the public eye. It’s why he gravitated toward the military, had always avoided the pomp as much as he could, and didn’t give his child a title. He long craved a life away from the prying eyes of the media. Meghan simply emboldened him to make the change. She supported him no matter what. “Fundamentally, Harry wanted out,” a source close to the couple said. “Deep down, he was always struggling within that world. She’s opened the door for him on that.”

Five long days after the original meeting, the Queen issued a statement that a plan had emerged for “a constructive and supportive way forward for my grandson and his family” to take effect in the spring of 2020. This was followed by a statement from Harry and Meghan. Both outlined the terms of the deal, which stipulated that the couple would completely step back from royal duties. No longer working members of the royal family, they would not be able to use their HRH titles or the word “royal” in any of their future endeavours. Harry would lose his military honours, and his role as Commonwealth youth ambassador was also pulled.

Harry and Meghan were allowed to maintain their private patronages. Although they could no longer formally represent the Queen, they “made clear that everything they do will continue to uphold the values of Her Majesty”.

As to the issue of money, Harry and Meghan would no longer receive public funds for royal duties. The couple took it even further, stating: “The Duke and Duchess of Sussex have shared their wish to repay sovereign grant expenditure for the refurbishment of Frogmore Cottage, which will remain their UK family home.”

That was £2.4 million of taxpayer money that sections of the British public were furious about when the number was confirmed in the 2018–19 sovereign grant report, released the previous July. Constant negative press coverage surrounding their renovations did little to help. It felt good to put that behind them. Offering to repay the money was a symbol of how much Harry and Meghan wanted to cut any ties. Privately, Prince Charles said he would help them financially, out of his personal money, if they needed it.

The most demoralising aspect of the deal was Harry being stripped of his honorary military appointments. “That’s been a tough pill to swallow, and one that has been most painful to Meghan witness him go through,” a source close to the couple said. “It’s the one that made Harry emotional.”

“It was so unnecessary,” Meghan later told a friend. “And it’s not just taking something away from him; it’s also that entire military veteran community. You can see how much he means to them, too. So why? The powers [of the institution] are unfortunately greater than me.”

While the hours crept closer to the couple’s final day as working royals on March 31, Harry and Meghan continued working. Commitments that had been made long before their January announcement still needed to be carried out, and for both of them, it was important not to let anyone down. Plus, they were at their best when they were busy.

While Harry spent much of his time in the UK in meetings with palace staff to tie up final details, he did make time for family. He had barely exchanged words with his brother since they had last seen each other at Sandringham, but Harry did enjoy chats on the phone with his father, whose private secretary continued to oversee the final elements of the transition. The line between family and institution was more blurred than ever, but it was perfectly clear who was playing what role when the Queen invited Harry over to lunch on March 1. Though his last time with Her Majesty had been in a more formal capacity, this time it would just be the two of them for Sunday lunch. “No titles,” an aide said. “Just granny and grandson.”

Sitting at the Queen’s dining room in her Windsor Castle apartment, it was just like the old days. While he had lost respect for parts of the institution, and even certain family members at points, the Queen was still one of the most important women in his life. As they tucked into a roast lunch, the Queen made it clear to Harry that she would always support him in whatever he decided to do. Though a 12-month trial period had already been promised to Harry earlier in the year, their conversation was also a reminder that should he and Meghan ever want to return to their roles, they were always welcome.

“It’s been made very clear they can come back whenever they want, when they’re ready,” a source involved with the negotiations said.

One of their final engagements was the Commonwealth service at Westminster Abbey. But if they ever needed confirmation that stepping away from the institution was the right move, the machinations that had preceded it served as a useful reminder. Although they had been part of the procession of senior royals who entered the church with the Queen in previous years, this year they discovered they had been removed from the line-up. The decision had been made without their consultation, and they were informed long after the 2,000 orders of service had been printed for guests, with their names notably absent. This year it would just be the Duke and Duchess of Cambridge, the Prince of Wales, and the Duchess of Cornwall walking through the abbey with the Queen. It felt intentional. “Harry was more than disappointed,” a friend said. “He spoke up, but the damage had already been done.”

To smooth things over, the Cambridges agreed to take their seats at the same time as the Sussexes and the Earl and Countess of Wessex. But if looks were anything to go by, the Cambridges were unhappy with the decision. While Harry and Meghan both greeted William and Kate with smiles, the Cambridges showed little response. It was the first time the two couples had seen each other since January. “Harry,” William nodded, ignoring Meghan. For the minutes before the Queen’s arrival, William and Kate sat with their backs to the couple, only turning around to chat with Prince Edward and Sophie, next to the Sussexes. Although Meghan tried to make eye contact with Kate, the duchess barely acknowledged her.

While the couples had been in a slightly better place after Archie’s birth, relations fell apart again in January as the family negotiated Meghan and Harry’s new roles. William, a Kensington Palace source explained, remained upset that private family matters were made public by the couple. “It’s not anger,” the source explained. “It’s hurt.”

“It should have been the one public moment where the royal family put their arms around the couple for a show of support,” a source close to Harry and Meghan said. “They purposefully chose not to put them in the procession and not to be welcoming. It was most unpleasant.” Buckingham Palace shrugged off the procession change, saying there was “no set format”.

After the service, Meghan flew back to Canada — she had booked the first flight after the service to return to Archie. “Meg just wanted to get home,” said a friend, noting that the duchess was emotionally bruised and exhausted. “At that point she couldn’t imagine wanting to set a foot back into anything royal again.”

This reminds me of the Andrew Morton book where Diana didnt collaborate with him either Obviously they thought if they did this book they would have the same reaction that Diana did and everyone would love them. They totally misjudged really about them

 

[Margot1977]

Also the interview with ageing celebrity lesbian impersonator Omid Scobie is very revealing. Men who lie about their age are usually up to no good. We ladies have our own reasons. Aunty is 25 and as evryone knows hot.

He's just another professional race baiter. Prejudice against Iranians as a race is virtually non-existent except in the middle-east. Personally I'm bloody sick of it. There is racial injustice, a lot of it within racial groups; but this society by any measure is not the Jim Crow American deep south; and to try and normalise the narrative that the House of Windsor is a racist institution is wicked and ahistorical. Imaginative racial tolerance is a hallmark of the British Royal Family who basically see themselves as above race. Think Victoria and the Munshi etc etc.

He might have mixed up racial prejudice with a prejudice against patent arseholes...

 

[LadyMuck]

O/T, when is the ruling due on the identity of the 5 friends, does anyone know?

 

[Carey2020]

Here you go:

As the Range Rover pulled up the driveway to Sandringham House, Harry was nervous. The estate, where the Queen was in residence and so many Christmas memories had been made, was now the setting for the most important meeting of his royal life.

It was also the hardest. He found himself more at odds with his family than ever. It wasn’t an easy decision to stand up to the age-old rules of the monarchy, but for Harry, this was his only option in “making things right for his own little family”, a source close to the couple said. “This is tearing him apart. He loves the Queen, but his wife feels aggrieved, and he adores his son. Harry’s whole world is Archie.”

Harry was facing the Queen, Charles, and William for the first time since he and Meghan had released their full plans to step away from their official roles in the royal family to the world. (Although Prince Philip had been expected to participate in the meeting, he left for his farmhouse located on the estate shortly before discussions got under way.)

In the days since Harry and Meghan launched their website, sussexroyal.com, Buckingham Palace’s dismay had turned to resolve in repairing the situation and moving on as quickly as possible. While the hybrid model of royalty that Harry and Meghan suggested posed a huge challenge that few thought could be overcome, one source said: “The drama and division is doing the most damage.”

Prior to the meeting, aides had assured Harry that the Queen wanted to help the Sussexes find a resolution, even if they might not get everything they wanted. Despite the reassurances, Harry wasn’t sure who to believe any more.

Since getting married, Harry and Meghan had enjoyed calling their own shots. “Harry and Meghan liked being in control of their narrative,” a source said, which is why originally agreeing to fold their household into Buckingham Palace, instead of creating their own independent court, had proved a big disappointment to them.

Harry and Meghan had wanted to create their own individual household in Windsor, meaning their own office staffed with their own team, who would be separate from all others. But senior officials quickly ruled out that option.
The senior courtiers whom Diana used to refer to as “men in grey suits” were concerned that the global interest in and popularity of the Sussexes needed to be reined in. In the short time since their fairytale wedding, Harry and Meghan were already propelling the monarchy to new heights around the world.

As their popularity had grown, so did Harry and Meghan’s difficulty in understanding why so few inside the palace were looking out for their interests. They were a major draw for the royal family. According to a press reports that compared the online popularity of the Sussexes with the Cambridges from November 2017 to January 2020, “Harry-and-Meghan-related searches accounted for 83 per cent of the world’s curiosity in the two couples”.

The Sussexes had made the monarchy more relatable to those who had never before felt a connection. However, there were concerns that the couple should be brought into the fold; otherwise the establishment feared their popularity might eclipse that of the royal family.
Increasingly Harry had grown frustrated that he and Meghan often took a back seat to other family members. While they both respected the hierarchy of the institution, it was difficult when they wanted to focus on a project and were told that a more senior ranking family member, be it Prince William or Prince Charles, had an initiative or tour being announced at the same time — so they would just have to wait.

For months the couple tried to air these frustrations, but the conversations didn’t lead anywhere. Worse, there were just a handful of people working at the palace they could trust. Outside this core team, no information was safe. A friend of the couple’s referred to the old guard as “the vipers”. Meanwhile, an equally frustrated palace staffer described the Sussexes’ team as “the squeaky third wheel” of the palace.
Highly emotional and fiercely protective of his wife and son, Harry was drained by the unique circumstances of his family, which, as a source described, “doesn’t have the opportunity to operate as an actual family”. While politics are part of every family dynamic, they are at a whole other level for William, Harry, and the rest of the royals. “Every conversation, every issue, every personal disagreement, whatever it may be, involves staff,” the source said of the aides who invariably send and receive messages between the royal households. “It creates a really weird environment that actually doesn’t allow people to sort things out themselves.”

No one could deny the fact that the couple were emotionally exhausted, whether they had brought it on themselves or were victims of a merciless machine. “They felt under pressure,” a source said. “They felt that they were alone.”

For Harry especially, it was all getting to be too much. “Doesn’t the Queen deserve better?” screamed one newspaper headline, which the prince read online. “These people are just paid trolls,” he later told a friend. “Nothing but trolls . . . and it’s disgusting.”

Scrolling on his iPhone, he sometimes couldn’t stop himself from reading the comments on the articles.

“H&M disgust me.”

“They are a disgrace to the royal family.”

“The world would be a better place without Harry and Meghan in it.”

The last comment had over 3,500 upvotes. Harry regretted opening the link. His stomach tied into the same knot every time he saw these sorts of comment. “It’s a sick part of the society we live in today, and no one is doing anything about it,” he continued. “Where’s the positivity? Why is everyone so miserable and angry?”

It wasn’t just the press or online trolls getting to Harry. It was also the institution of the monarchy. Barely a week went by without an aspect of their internal affairs or matters of private discussions being twisted and leaked to the press. They felt as though there were very few members of the palace staff they could trust. Harry’s relationship with William, which had been strained for a while, was getting worse.

As the autumn had worn on and tensions with certain sections of the palace grew, Harry and Meghan decided they needed to get out of the country for a while. Christmas was right around the corner, and spending it at Sandringham surrounded by members of the royal family did not sound like a holiday.

The couple decided that for the second half of November and all of December they would base themselves in Canada. They headed for an $18 million Vancouver Island estate that their friend Ben Mulroney helped secure through the music producer David Foster. Foster was close friends with the wealthy investor who had put the property up for sale and was willing to let it to the couple for far below market value.

With two private beaches on four acres of land, it provided a haven for the shell-shocked couple. Meghan’s mother, Doria, visited for the Thanksgiving holiday.

Away from the courtiers and all things royal, they could think for themselves. They went over the events since the wedding and talked about how and if they could create a situation that would make for a better future. “I don’t need to have that movie moment where we get out of a car and wave to a hundred photographers before going into a building,” Harry told a friend. “It should just be about the work happening inside. Let’s focus on what really matters.”

Before leaving the UK, Harry had spoken a handful of times to his grandmother and father and a number of key aides about the urgent need to change things for him and his wife within the palace structure. He felt at once used for their popularity, hounded by the press because of the public’s fascination with this new breed of royal couple, and disparaged back within the institution’s walls for being too sensitive and outspoken. He and Meghan didn’t want to walk away from the monarchy; rather, they wanted to find a happy place within it.

But as the weeks went by, the couple had realised they couldn’t go back to the way things had been at home. As hard as the decision was to make, they came to a conclusion: Harry and Meghan were going to step back from their roles as senior royals — and cut themselves off from access to the sovereign grant.

Despite the change, they still wanted to carry out their duties for the Queen. That was the one thing that they did not want to end — not just because of Harry’s love and respect for his grandmother, but also because Meghan felt she had given up so much to take her life down a path of service to the monarchy. She didn’t quit when she signed up for a task.

They knew there would be hurdles, such as discussions over the security that was provided by the Metropolitan Police for “internationally protected people”. But they were confident enough that before Christmas, Harry emailed his grandmother and father to say that he and Meghan had come to the decision to change the way they worked — to step back and spend more time abroad. He didn’t get into much more detail, worried that the news might leak via a member of staff. The rest, he said, they would discuss in person.

With both family members informed, Charles’s private office was requested to schedule a time for the two to meet the Queen, who was based at Sandringham for the holiday, as soon as the Sussexes returned to the UK on January 6. Their trip to London was going to be short, but Harry was keen to ensure that by the time they returned to Canada at the end of the week, their new chapter had been secured.

Harry was right to be worried about leaks. Details from the email soon ended up in the hands of a tabloid reporter who began inquiring about the couple’s plans to spend more time in Canada. But that was the least of his worries. Despite repeated follow-ups with his father’s office, he was unable to secure time with the Queen. She would not be available, he was told, until January 29. “He felt like he was being blocked,” a source close to the prince said.

As their Air Canada flight made its early morning touchdown at Heathrow, and still with no appointment to see Her Majesty, Harry and Meghan toyed with the idea of driving straight to see the Queen. Not wanting to cause problems for themselves (arriving unannounced would have ruffled feathers), the couple instead called for a team meeting at their home, Frogmore Cottage. With senior aides Harry and Meghan revealed details of their plans to the team. Whether their speedy approach was right or not, Harry and Meghan were more determined than ever. “At this point they felt like they had brought up the subject enough times with family members over the past year and they were fed up of not being taken seriously,” a source close to the couple said. “Everyone had their chance to help but no one did.”

Few things remain secret between royal households and it didn’t take long after Harry’s initial email for the Sussexes’ grand plans to be the topic of conversation among most of the aides and family members. Worried about losing control of the situation, Harry contacted his grandmother to explain his concerns, and she signed off on putting together a jointly agreed statement. The couple hesitated about involving the other households, not knowing if everyone involved would have their best intentions, but agreed for aides to meet up the next day and get on the same page.

With a plan in place, Harry and Meghan put on big smiles the following day as they chatted to dignitaries at an engagement with the high commissioner of Canada to the UK. But privately they were both nervous about what was about to happen. They had seen a draft of what Buckingham Palace planned to put out in a statement that would follow theirs and its “lack of warmth” was a clear sign that not everyone supported their decision.

But there was little time to dwell. Just a few hours after leaving Canada House, a story about their plans to stay in Canada broke. Details were missing, but it was clear that someone within the palace had briefed the newspaper. A royal source absolutely denied the charge, blaming the couple for the leak, “because they were frustrated at the palace in the talks that were going on . . . They wanted to force the decision, to break it open.” The couple deny this claim.

With the news out and media organisations contacting the palace for comment, a statement needed to be issued fast. On January 8, the couple took to Instagram to share their news with the world. Alongside their announcement, they launched sussexroyal.com, which was no longer a landing page for their new foundation but a road map of the “new working model” they hoped to espouse. It offered clarity on their decision to be financially independent, which was not only to have more freedom in their work but also to remove the tabloids’ justification in having access to their lives.

The website took everyone, even their communications team, by surprise. Aides and family members knew the couple wanted to step back, but the website, which laid out the details of their half-in-half-out model as if it were a done deal, put the Queen in a difficult position.

Flustered Buckingham Palace aides ditched their original statement and put out a short media release 15 minutes after the Sussexes released theirs: “Discussions with the Duke and Duchess of Sussex are at an early stage. We understand their desire to take a different approach, but these are complicated issues that will take time to work through.”

The aides, including the Queen’s private secretary, Edward Young, were furious. “The private offices don’t like that type of behaviour,” a source familiar with the negotiations said. “It is deeply unhealthy and unwelcome.”

More unsettling, however, was the reaction from the family to the website they had launched. “The element of surprise, the blindsiding of the Queen, for the other principals who are all very mindful of this, rightfully, it was deeply upsetting” according to a senior member of the household. Several in the family shared that both the Queen and Prince Philip were “devastated”.

“The family is very private and bringing it into the public domain, when they were told not to, hurt the Queen,” the source continued. “It was laying out what the Sussexes wanted in a statement without consulting with Her Majesty first — and she’s the head of the institution.”

The palace scrambled to figure out if all of the requirements in the couple’s manifesto could even work logistically, including having the “future financial autonomy to work externally”. This was very different from the simple idea of spending more time abroad that had originally been presented. There were security and funding issues, tax implications, and visas. How could they legally take on commercial endeavours and still represent the Queen? “It was a huge headache,” an exasperated aide said.

Even a source close to the couple admitted that while Harry and Meghan had put a lot of thought into this immense transition, they could also be “impatient and impulsive”. “They run hot, in a way,” the source said. “The reactions in individual moments are definitely not the same, a month, a few weeks, down the line.”

Despite her sadness at the thought of losing the Sussexes as working royals, the Queen could see it was necessary for the couple to completely separate from the institution. No one should be forced into something they don’t want to do. But if Harry thought that their public proposal would result in their getting exactly what they wanted “he was sorely mistaken”, a senior courtier said. “The Queen understood the difficulties they faced, but the rules don’t bend for anyone.” Buckingham Palace issued a statement stating that a solution to Harry and Meghan’s requests would be reached “within days, not weeks”.

After three days of discussions between the royal households and government officials, including the Canadian government, the Queen requested that Harry travel up to Sandringham to meet her, Charles and William.

At the “Sandringham summit”, the four of them would sort out the future once and for all.

What a source described as a “practical workmanlike approach” permeated the room as the royals set out to form a deal. Harry felt as though he and Meghan had long been sidelined by the institution and were not a fundamental part of its future.

One didn’t have to look further than the family photos displayed during the Queen’s Speech on Christmas Day. In the Green Drawing Room at Buckingham Palace, where the Queen delivered her address, viewers glimpsed photos of the Cambridges and their children, Charles and Camilla, Prince Philip, and a black-and-white image of George VI. Noticeably absent was a photo of Harry, Meghan, and their new baby, Archie. Palace sources insisted that the photos were chosen to represent the direct line of succession, but for Harry and Meghan, it had been yet another sign that they needed to consider their own path.

Charles made it clear to Harry that he and Meghan were very much part of the future for the royal family despite calls for a “slimmed-down monarchy” with fewer senior working royals. “The Prince of Wales’s vision always included Harry as part of a slimmed down monarchy,” a source close to the family shared. “His vision included both his sons. William will always be more important than Harry but that’s a fact only because of birthright.”

Though William had not taken the original news of his brother’s plan well, his fate was up to the Queen, and she was very aware that the outcome of the meeting would set the standard for generations to come.

Finally, she made it clear that their quasi-royal vision would not work. “It was untenable,” a palace source said. “If Harry and Meghan had been semi-working royals, there would have had to have been oversight in everything they did in their independent sphere, a committee to approve events and deals.”

When the meeting was over, Harry immediately debriefed Sussex aides before sending a text to Meghan. That evening, the Queen put out a candid and personal statement. “My family and I are entirely supportive of Harry and Meghan’s desire to create a new life as a young family,” the statement read. “Although we would have preferred them to remain full-time working members of the royal family, we respect and understand their wish to live a more independent life as a family while remaining a valued part of my family.”

The official communication also announced that Harry and Meghan no longer wanted to rely on public money during the coming period of transition, during which time the couple would live in both Canada and the UK. “These are complex matters for my family to resolve, and there is some more work to be done,” the Queen stated, “but I have asked for final decisions to be reached in the coming days.”

“More work” was an understatement. Harry spent the next several days holed up in intense meetings and conference calls with top aides from all three royal households, Buckingham Palace, Clarence House, and Kensington Palace, which were led by Charles’s private secretary, Clive Alderton. William was more than happy to leave the matter up to staff. He was reported to have told a friend: “I’ve put my arm around my brother all our lives and I can’t do that anymore; we’re separate entities.”

That held true for Meghan and Kate as well. The two duchesses’ relationship had struggled to move past the distant politeness of when they first met. Their cordial but distant rapport was apparent when the pair appeared alongside each other at the King Power Royal Charity Polo Day the previous summer. While the doting mothers were photographed next to each other with their children, the two appeared to barely exchange a word.

The state of affairs between the two women was just an offshoot of the real issue at hand: the conflict between Harry and the institution. Harry likened his meetings throughout the week to standing in front of a firing squad. “There was a lot of finger pointing in both directions with things leaking,” an aide said. “It was all very unhealthy.”

When Harry described how he didn’t feel supported by his family, this was what he was referring to. They did their bit in the family meeting at Sandringham, and then they left him to defend himself against and negotiate with their aides, which is exactly what he didn’t want to happen. “He feels that there were so many occasions when the institution and his family could have helped them, stood up for them, backed them up, and never did,” a source said.

Courtiers viewed Harry’s position as completely unrealistic. While it was easy to say they wouldn’t take money from the sovereign grant, it was quite another thing to follow through. “The biggest row was over money, because it always is,” a source familiar with the negotiations said. One aide made a joke about Meghan launching a line of beauty products.

More accurately, the couple hoped to earn a living through speaking engagements, production deals, and other commercial deals that had social impact. Still, there were some difficult calculations to be made. If Harry and Meghan did some official work, they would have to figure out how much of their expenses were private rather than subject to tax relief. “They’ve created a complete headache for everyone,” an exhausted aide complained on the fifth day of meetings.

More difficult were the hurt feelings on both sides. Even sources close to Harry and Meghan had to admit that the way the couple were forced to approach the situation (mainly in the act of keeping the family and their team in the dark about their website) “created a lot of ill will in the household and especially in the family”.

“Harry and Meghan would have reached a more beneficial agreement to allow them to live the life they wanted if they had handled things in a private, dignified way,” a senior Buckingham Palace aide explained. Another courtier added: “They oversimplified what they were asking for. They thought they’d give Charles their rider, negotiate over email, rock up to London, give three months’ notice and fly back to Canada.”

Harry and Meghan, however, felt that they had been patronised by other family and staff members for too long. People had humoured them when they brought up grievances, never thinking the couple would actually do anything drastic. The explosive reaction was a direct result of their growing impatience. If other members of the family and those working with the households had taken their requests more seriously, it wouldn’t have reached that point.

Either way, the source said: “The courtiers blame Meghan, and some family do.”

The media speculated that Meghan was behind the decision for the couple to step back, but few knew how much she sacrificed to try to make it work. As Meghan tearfully told a friend in March: “I gave up my entire life for this family. I was willing to do whatever it takes. But here we are. It’s very sad.”

While the British media often blamed royal wives, in Harry’s case, he was very much on board with distancing himself from the public eye. It’s why he gravitated toward the military, had always avoided the pomp as much as he could, and didn’t give his child a title. He long craved a life away from the prying eyes of the media. Meghan simply emboldened him to make the change. She supported him no matter what. “Fundamentally, Harry wanted out,” a source close to the couple said. “Deep down, he was always struggling within that world. She’s opened the door for him on that.”

Five long days after the original meeting, the Queen issued a statement that a plan had emerged for “a constructive and supportive way forward for my grandson and his family” to take effect in the spring of 2020. This was followed by a statement from Harry and Meghan. Both outlined the terms of the deal, which stipulated that the couple would completely step back from royal duties. No longer working members of the royal family, they would not be able to use their HRH titles or the word “royal” in any of their future endeavours. Harry would lose his military honours, and his role as Commonwealth youth ambassador was also pulled.

Harry and Meghan were allowed to maintain their private patronages. Although they could no longer formally represent the Queen, they “made clear that everything they do will continue to uphold the values of Her Majesty”.

As to the issue of money, Harry and Meghan would no longer receive public funds for royal duties. The couple took it even further, stating: “The Duke and Duchess of Sussex have shared their wish to repay sovereign grant expenditure for the refurbishment of Frogmore Cottage, which will remain their UK family home.”

That was £2.4 million of taxpayer money that sections of the British public were furious about when the number was confirmed in the 2018–19 sovereign grant report, released the previous July. Constant negative press coverage surrounding their renovations did little to help. It felt good to put that behind them. Offering to repay the money was a symbol of how much Harry and Meghan wanted to cut any ties. Privately, Prince Charles said he would help them financially, out of his personal money, if they needed it.

The most demoralising aspect of the deal was Harry being stripped of his honorary military appointments. “That’s been a tough pill to swallow, and one that has been most painful to Meghan witness him go through,” a source close to the couple said. “It’s the one that made Harry emotional.”

“It was so unnecessary,” Meghan later told a friend. “And it’s not just taking something away from him; it’s also that entire military veteran community. You can see how much he means to them, too. So why? The powers [of the institution] are unfortunately greater than me.”

While the hours crept closer to the couple’s final day as working royals on March 31, Harry and Meghan continued working. Commitments that had been made long before their January announcement still needed to be carried out, and for both of them, it was important not to let anyone down. Plus, they were at their best when they were busy.

While Harry spent much of his time in the UK in meetings with palace staff to tie up final details, he did make time for family. He had barely exchanged words with his brother since they had last seen each other at Sandringham, but Harry did enjoy chats on the phone with his father, whose private secretary continued to oversee the final elements of the transition. The line between family and institution was more blurred than ever, but it was perfectly clear who was playing what role when the Queen invited Harry over to lunch on March 1. Though his last time with Her Majesty had been in a more formal capacity, this time it would just be the two of them for Sunday lunch. “No titles,” an aide said. “Just granny and grandson.”

Sitting at the Queen’s dining room in her Windsor Castle apartment, it was just like the old days. While he had lost respect for parts of the institution, and even certain family members at points, the Queen was still one of the most important women in his life. As they tucked into a roast lunch, the Queen made it clear to Harry that she would always support him in whatever he decided to do. Though a 12-month trial period had already been promised to Harry earlier in the year, their conversation was also a reminder that should he and Meghan ever want to return to their roles, they were always welcome.

“It’s been made very clear they can come back whenever they want, when they’re ready,” a source involved with the negotiations said.

One of their final engagements was the Commonwealth service at Westminster Abbey. But if they ever needed confirmation that stepping away from the institution was the right move, the machinations that had preceded it served as a useful reminder. Although they had been part of the procession of senior royals who entered the church with the Queen in previous years, this year they discovered they had been removed from the line-up. The decision had been made without their consultation, and they were informed long after the 2,000 orders of service had been printed for guests, with their names notably absent. This year it would just be the Duke and Duchess of Cambridge, the Prince of Wales, and the Duchess of Cornwall walking through the abbey with the Queen. It felt intentional. “Harry was more than disappointed,” a friend said. “He spoke up, but the damage had already been done.”

To smooth things over, the Cambridges agreed to take their seats at the same time as the Sussexes and the Earl and Countess of Wessex. But if looks were anything to go by, the Cambridges were unhappy with the decision. While Harry and Meghan both greeted William and Kate with smiles, the Cambridges showed little response. It was the first time the two couples had seen each other since January. “Harry,” William nodded, ignoring Meghan. For the minutes before the Queen’s arrival, William and Kate sat with their backs to the couple, only turning around to chat with Prince Edward and Sophie, next to the Sussexes. Although Meghan tried to make eye contact with Kate, the duchess barely acknowledged her.

While the couples had been in a slightly better place after Archie’s birth, relations fell apart again in January as the family negotiated Meghan and Harry’s new roles. William, a Kensington Palace source explained, remained upset that private family matters were made public by the couple. “It’s not anger,” the source explained. “It’s hurt.”

“It should have been the one public moment where the royal family put their arms around the couple for a show of support,” a source close to Harry and Meghan said. “They purposefully chose not to put them in the procession and not to be welcoming. It was most unpleasant.” Buckingham Palace shrugged off the procession change, saying there was “no set format”.

After the service, Meghan flew back to Canada — she had booked the first flight after the service to return to Archie. “Meg just wanted to get home,” said a friend, noting that the duchess was emotionally bruised and exhausted. “At that point she couldn’t imagine wanting to set a foot back into anything royal again.”

This is unreal. Did they think they changed the world in a few months? The level of interest? I've never read such delusion. They did nothing. They rocked up to a handful of engagements. That's all. Just imagine if Anne or Sophie had started leaking, moaning, whinging after marrying, demanding separate households, demanding every negative article be commented on, leaking but blaming others for leaking? I'm exhausted just reading and answering, I can only imagine how energy sapping the pair of them are in real life. This is all about attention and fame hidden behind the guise of 'our work'. They don't do any, we've seen no fruits of their 'labour'. They are that friend who drones on about themselves, saps your energy listening to them and advising for hours, and then they ignore and do their own disastrous things anyways and lurch from one drama to another, making lots of noise but doing little of worth. They are so boring and deluded.

 

[antinoos]

O/T, when is the ruling due on the identity of the 5 friends, does anyone know?

Most intriguing though half the legal world is on vacation and its not urgent. The issues are not complex either factually or particularly legally, though of course the ramifications of anonymising key witnesses would be, so its hardly going to take 3 weeks to write.

Its probably a collection of factors; and of course the losing party will almost certainly appeal and it will therefore be necessary to temporarily restrain the Mail from publication if as I expect Meghan loses.

Also of course they might be frantically trying to settle behind the scenes; and if the identity of the famous five is shall we say an embarrassment to the Duchess it will be a strong incentive so to do. Quite possibly large sums of money are being discussed behind the scenes. These are of course the Mails legal costs. Meghan will be on the hook for the costs of the lost Application; and the most humiliating settlement for her would be paying ALL the Mails costs as a condition of discontinuing her disaster of a Claim.

Id love to know whats going on. It wont be pretty. Especially with Amber and Johnny torching their careers in the background.