Gender Discussions #3

[CheshireLove]

Top parenting, and also illegal I think.
View attachment 348702
These stupid stupid well meaning parents. Who ever peddled the idea that blockers are nothing but a ‘pause’ button can burn in hell. Such a dangerous narrative that’s taken a life of its own.

Can’t wait till 30 years down the line when we inevitably start seeing the consequences of all these people using blockers and hormones not designed for their biological sex. No doubt the nhs will be left to pick up the pieces, if it even exists by then.

I came across this yesterday and actually read the entire (very lengthy) backstory written by the mother on gofundme. She’s clearly ‘drunk the koolaid’ and has made being trans an all consuming identity for this child. Every aspect of this child’s life is about being trans, there is a very lengthy section all about the child’s ‘activism’. The begging and blaming in the backstory is grim. Some choice quotes that appalled me include:

“Without access to blockers I don’t think she will make it through the next few years.”

“PLEASE HELP - TIME IS RUNNING OUT AS EMILY IS REACHING PUBERTY!”

“the thought of developing into a male is absolutely destroyed her.”

“She is fraught with anxiety about her voice breaking, hair starting to grow on her face and body, her adams apple protruding and her body betraying her.”

Every aspect of his life is about being trans, or has been since the age of three according to the mother.

‘Developing into a male’? He is male!

Why is her child in such a state that she infers that he will end his own life if he doesn’t get given puberty blockers? What on earth are they telling and promising these children?

 

[rosemarina]

This is hideous. Somebody is feeding that child's fears.

 

[judgejohndeed]

That endo article is infuriating. It takes on average 7 years to get an endo diagnosis. It helps nobody to pit white women and women of colour against each other on this. The real culprit are the medical professions who routinely downplay women's pain and suffering in health and don't listen to us or take us seriously.

 

[Bitofthebubbly]

I came across this yesterday and actually read the entire (very lengthy) backstory written by the mother on gofundme. She’s clearly ‘drunk the koolaid’ and has made being trans an all consuming identity for this child. Every aspect of this child’s life is about being trans, there is a very lengthy section all about the child’s ‘activism’. The begging and blaming in the backstory is grim. Some choice quotes that appalled me include:

“Without access to blockers I don’t think she will make it through the next few years.”

“PLEASE HELP - TIME IS RUNNING OUT AS EMILY IS REACHING PUBERTY!”

“the thought of developing into a male is absolutely destroyed her.”

“She is fraught with anxiety about her voice breaking, hair starting to grow on her face and body, her adams apple protruding and her body betraying her.”

Every aspect of his life is about being trans, or has been since the age of three according to the mother.

‘Developing into a male’? He is male!

Why is her child in such a state that she infers that he will end his own life if he doesn’t get given puberty blockers? What on earth are they telling and promising these children?

It’s horrific. Kids don’t come up with this stuff on their own. I have an 8 and 5 year old and they don’t have a clue about gender identity, why would they? They know that they can do anything, they can have short hair or long if they like and wear what ever, play with what ever. I’m pretty gnc myself so they know women aren’t just about make up and heels and that’s ok.

It sounds like this mother wanted a daughter all along and is doing some mega projecting and giving this kid the fear about growing up. It’s really creepy and sad. If things really are as the mother says, then this child hasn’t had a childhood at all.

 

[judgejohndeed]

I read an article on the BBC yesterday about a man who was trying to get an apology from the Uni of Birmingham for electro-shock therapy he had years ago, basically gay conversion therapy. In the article, he said he was told even back then it would be better to be trans than to be gay. The Tavistock said similar a year or two ago, about parents bringing their kids in saying they don't want a gay child. I'm very interested that this isn't routinely explored with the parents of 'trans' children, I do wonder how much of it is just straight up homophobia when the parents are this involved.

 

[Phil Anne Throw Pee]

I sincerely apologise to anyone who is offended by me being a white woman with a womb that suffers from endo. But enough now. Women are the ones who have wombs, periods and the assorted minutaie therein. Not cis women, not people with wombs, people who happen to have periods or whoever else is claiming it. I hate all this 'anti-woke' narrative, at the same time, insisting that I am recognised as a woman is not woke, it's just my birthright.

 

[judgejohndeed]

I sincerely apologise to anyone who is offended by me being a white woman with a womb that suffers from endo. But enough now. Women are the ones who have wombs, periods and the assorted minutaie therein. Not cis women, not people with wombs, people who happen to have periods or whoever else is claiming it. I hate all this 'anti-woke' narrative, at the same time, insisting that I am recognised as a woman is not woke, it's just my birthright.

Don't apologise! As a white women with endo I can recognise that women of colour are probably facing a double jeopardy in being already female as well as not white when trying to get a medical answer, whilst simultaneously knowing that women of any race are disadvantaged when it comes to women's health. If TRAs can't hold these not mutually exclusive thoughts in their heads at the same time, their stupidity isn't our problem. It's really obvious that this is just another topic they want to divide and conquer about, when actually women should be banding together on this to speed up diagnoses for all women and to especially recognise when certain groups (e.g. women of colour) are going to have to push even harder to get answers. To me, 'privilege' works on a scale - clearly, white women are more privileged than women of colour because we are white. I totally accept that. But that does not mean we 'are' privileged, we are still discriminated against in medicine. To suggest otherwise is a nonsense.

 

[IndominusRex]

It took me 15 years and a £££ private lap to get my endo diagnosis despite all the symptoms, a family history, and me asking several times.

 

[maytoseptember]

I came across this yesterday and actually read the entire (very lengthy) backstory written by the mother on gofundme. She’s clearly ‘drunk the koolaid’ and has made being trans an all consuming identity for this child. Every aspect of this child’s life is about being trans, there is a very lengthy section all about the child’s ‘activism’. The begging and blaming in the backstory is grim. Some choice quotes that appalled me include:

“Without access to blockers I don’t think she will make it through the next few years.”

“PLEASE HELP - TIME IS RUNNING OUT AS EMILY IS REACHING PUBERTY!”

“the thought of developing into a male is absolutely destroyed her.”

“She is fraught with anxiety about her voice breaking, hair starting to grow on her face and body, her adams apple protruding and her body betraying her.”

Every aspect of his life is about being trans, or has been since the age of three according to the mother.

‘Developing into a male’? He is male!

Why is her child in such a state that she infers that he will end his own life if he doesn’t get given puberty blockers? What on earth are they telling and promising these children?

Child abuse.

This child’s “transness” is clearly an invention of the mother (why is it always the mothers?!). Vegan cat etc etc.

 

[Zenchick101]

I sincerely apologise to anyone who is offended by me being a white woman with a womb that suffers from endo. But enough now. Women are the ones who have wombs, periods and the assorted minutaie therein. Not cis women, not people with wombs, people who happen to have periods or whoever else is claiming it. I hate all this 'anti-woke' narrative, at the same time, insisting that I am recognised as a woman is not woke, it's just my birthright.

yeah tha

Don't apologise! As a white women with endo I can recognise that women of colour are probably facing a double jeopardy in being already female as well as not white when trying to get a medical answer, whilst simultaneously knowing that women of any race are disadvantaged when it comes to women's health. If TRAs can't hold these not mutually exclusive thoughts in their heads at the same time, their stupidity isn't our problem. It's really obvious that this is just another topic they want to divide and conquer about, when actually women should be banding together on this to speed up diagnoses for all women and to especially recognise when certain groups (e.g. women of colour) are going to have to push even harder to get answers. To me, 'privilege' works on a scale - clearly, white women are more privileged than women of colour because we are white. I totally accept that. But that does not mean we 'are' privileged, we are still discriminated against in medicine. To suggest otherwise is a nonsense.

Respectfully, I have to disagree. I know you're message is well meaning but I absolutely hate when TRA divide women of colour and white women. I'm tired of the narrative of the poor woc oppressed and treated as inferior compared to white women, how would that happen in this setting? It's a north american publication you're telling me an overwhelming number of doctors are racist? I'm also tired of the narrative in contexts where it's not needed, makes us look like we've got a chip on our shoulder/jealous towards white women, when I don't harbour resentment towards any group.

Whenever trans articles include woc like this I see it as - let me include more oppressed groups so I can make this article as woke signaling as possible.
It's divisive and weird, one of the reasons I can't take TRAs seriously - always looking for a token oppressed group to latch on to.

 

[witchofwestbyfleet]

I read an article not too long ago by a mother complaining that the world was unfair to her "non-binary" child. He (it was clear from the article that he was a boy) had a mix of interests: cars, maths, pink, glitter etc. and told her that he felt he was "half boy and half girl." Rather than explain to him that this isn't possible, the mother took him seriously. They decided together that he would identify as "non-binary" or "bigender" and be referred to as they/them. When the child's school wasn't supportive enough and asked the mother, who taught there, not to discuss her child's gender identity with the parents of other students she moved herself and the child to another school. She complained he was being bullied at the new school and it was unfair that the teachers asked children to line up by "boys" or "girls" - telling the child he could join either line. When the child had to go to hospital in an emergency the mother wrote "they/them pronouns" on the registration form in place of sex and then got angry that it was ignored. She ranted about the world "not making space" for her child and that her other children, including daughters were privileged because they were "cisgender" and no one questioned their identities.

I hope people like this are in a minority but she seemed like someone who'd happily try to get her son prescribed blockers if he decided he "needed" them. I believe most parents who would put their children on blockers genuinely want the best for their children but it really does make my blood boil that some of them would be just like this mother - or worse, the ones who use their "trans" child as some kind of political statement

 

[Icing _on_ the_cake]

I read an article not too long ago by a mother complaining that the world was unfair to her "non-binary" child. He (it was clear from the article that he was a boy) had a mix of interests: cars, maths, pink, glitter etc. and told her that he felt he was "half boy and half girl." Rather than explain to him that this isn't possible, the mother took him seriously. They decided together that he would identify as "non-binary" or "bigender" and be referred to as they/them. When the child's school wasn't supportive enough and asked the mother, who taught there, not to discuss her child's gender identity with the parents of other students she moved herself and the child to another school. She complained he was being bullied at the new school and it was unfair that the teachers asked children to line up by "boys" or "girls" - telling the child he could join either line. When the child had to go to hospital in an emergency the mother wrote "they/them pronouns" on the registration form in place of sex and then got angry that it was ignored. She ranted about the world "not making space" for her child and that her other children, including daughters were privileged because they were "cisgender" and no one questioned their identities.

I hope people like this are in a minority but she seemed like someone who'd happily try to get her son prescribed blockers if he decided he "needed" them. I believe most parents who would put their children on blockers genuinely want the best for their children but it really does make my blood boil that some of them would be just like this mother - or worse, the ones who use their "trans" child as some kind of political statement

Its narcissistic behaviour. This actually all about the mother and not about the child at all.

 

[Narc ahoy]

Well the 10 years part I can believe, I've had horrid periods since my teens = light headed, bloated stomach, staying home from school, hard to stand up, etc.. and it's only now mid twenties after seeing a new doctor and explaining to her that I kept vomiting and staying in the shower spraying hot water on myself in complete agony for hours (4-6?) on end, and that I was having a bloated stomach even outside of my period, not being able to clean myself, that she then thought I had endo and reccomended several tests including an endo specialist to verify it.

I found out my diagnosis through pure luck, up until then I was being fed drugstore pain that had no effect on me and being told to suck it up, while I dreamed about tearing out my uterus and ovaries because = absolute hell.

I need heat to relieve my endo pain too. Have you tried an electric blanket? I have a big one in my bed, and a little square one that I put directly on my belly. I spend the first two days of my period in my bed with the blankets on and off (when it gets to hot). Also I have a "bum gun" also known as Muslim shower fitted to my toilet which helps with cleaning myself.

Ps I am white but poor. I hate articles like the one you linked that throw around the word "white" as if we are deserving of comtempt and the fault of non-white women's problems. The reason why endometrisos takes a long time to be diagnosed is because no one takes mere "period pain" seriously. It's nothing to do with race. But the author wanted to shoe-horn in race to give the ridiculous bleating of the FTMs and enbies in her article more validity. Their entire problems can be summed up as tantrums at not wanting to be reminded of their immutable femaleness, and blaming "biased" doctors for not giving them a "safe space" to coddle them and pretend that this isn't an inherent female disease. This entire nonsense could be prevented if they would accept the difference between biology and gender identity.

The most ironic bit of the article was the snowflakes saying that they don't want to go to queer-friendly doctors as they might not know anything about the condition. Halfway there to admitting that pro-gender doctors are quacks.

 

[Zenchick101]

I need heat to relieve my endo pain too. Have you tried an electric blanket? I have a big one in my bed, and a little square one that I put directly on my belly. I spend the first two days of my period in my bed with the blankets on and off (when it gets to hot). Also I have a "bum gun" also known as Muslim shower fitted to my toilet which helps with cleaning myself.

Ps I am white but poor. I hate articles like the one you linked that throw around the word "white" as if we are deserving of comtempt and the fault of non-white women's problems. The reason why endometrisos takes a long time to be diagnosed is because no one takes mere "period pain" seriously. It's nothing to do with race. But the author wanted to shoe-horn in race to give the ridiculous bleating of the FTMs and enbies in her article more validity. Their entire problems can be summed up as tantrums at not wanting to be reminded of their immutable femaleness, and blaming "biased" doctors for not giving them a "safe space" to coddle them and pretend that this isn't an inherent female disease. This entire nonsense could be prevented if they would accept the difference between biology and gender identity.

The most ironic bit of the article was the snowflakes saying that they don't want to go to queer-friendly doctors as they might not know anything about the condition. Halfway there to admitting that pro-gender doctors are quacks.

THANK YOU! and yes been thinking of getting a hot water bottle for the odd time bc doesn't work but, in uni and broke lol

 

[2020two]

THANK YOU! and yes been thinking of getting a hot water bottle for the odd time bc doesn't work but, in uni and broke lol

Do you not have a hot water bottle? Please let me know if you need one as I'd be happy to help out a fellow endo struggler

To contribute to that batshit article - I am a white middle class professional woman and it took ELEVEN years for anyone to take my debilitating periods seriously, which included multiple nights crying in A&E and a few ambulance trips how do they manage to make everything about them?

 

[JustHereForTheAgriculture]

Treating Endometriosis as a Women's Disease Hurts Patients of All Genders

Living with endo is already hard when you're a white cis woman. For LGBTQ people dealing with a "women's disease," it's especially painful.

www.vice.com

affluent white woman disease? my broke mixed race body must have missed the memo. I'm sorry but this comes off as a narc narrative.

‘Living with endo is already hard when you're a white cis woman. For LGBTQ people dealing with a "women's disease," it's especially painful.’
For lgbtq people? So lesbians and bisexual women struggle with it being deemed a ‘womans issue’? The implication being they’re less of a woman!

 

[Narc ahoy]

The alphabet soup is for everyone but L, G and Bs.

 

[Zenchick101]

Do you not have a hot water bottle? Please let me know if you need one as I'd be happy to help out a fellow endo struggler

To contribute to that batshit article - I am a white middle class professional woman and it took ELEVEN years for anyone to take my debilitating periods seriously, which included multiple nights crying in A&E and a few ambulance trips how do they manage to make everything about them?

thank you, with bc i'm mostly ok, though occasionally my stomach gets bloated af and it's painful but there's not much pain down there - not sure if the bottle would be worth it for stomach pain?

 

[CheshireLove]

thank you, with bc i'm mostly ok, though occasionally my stomach gets bloated af and it's painful but there's not much pain down there - not sure if the bottle would be worth it for stomach pain?

Have you tried those self heating pads? You just open them up and they get really warm and you can stick them onto your clothes. ‘BeYou’ make some but Japanese brands make the best ones and you can get them online.

 

[Zenchick101]

Have you tried those self heating pads? You just open them up and they get really warm and you can stick them onto your clothes. ‘BeYou’ make some but Japanese brands make the best ones and you can get them online.

no never can you send me a link?