For anybody struggling ❤

[CrazyGiraffeLady]

I hope it wasn’t too upsetting for you x

It was upsetting when I walked in because I really thought she’d be sat there laughing and joking. I didn’t actually expect her to be gone. I know how daft that sounds but I really thought it was a mistake and all a big joke xx
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Hope you are ok. I’m glad you got to say your goodbyes. I know it must be so very traumatic for you but I found it helpful ultimately as it was this that helped me to accept she had gone. Take care lovely xx

I feel like she’s gone all over again but I feel like I’ve said goodbye. Reality is setting in now, I’ll never see my lovely mum again

 

[skronkywildcat]

I wish I could give you a hug or make you a cup of tea. It’ll be 8 months tomorrow since my mum died and I do feel like I’m over the worst bit - but I think about her every day, sometimes sadly and sometimes with a smile. She really was a special person and loved by so many friends. I can’t tell you - she was just fun and unique and went out of her way to help people.

I’m crying now.

 

[CrazyGiraffeLady]

I wish I could give you a hug or make you a cup of tea. It’ll be 8 months tomorrow since my mum died and I do feel like I’m over the worst bit - but I think about her every day, sometimes sadly and sometimes with a smile. She really was a special person and loved by so many friends. I can’t tell you - she was just fun and unique and went out of her way to help people.

I’m crying now.

I’m so sorry for your loss sending love for tomorrow

 

[Rocket Queen]

I wish I could give you a hug or make you a cup of tea. It’ll be 8 months tomorrow since my mum died and I do feel like I’m over the worst bit - but I think about her every day, sometimes sadly and sometimes with a smile. She really was a special person and loved by so many friends. I can’t tell you - she was just fun and unique and went out of her way to help people.

I’m crying now.

Your Mum sounds absolutely amazing. I’m so very sorry. Wish we could have a massive group hug, a good cuppa and good chat. I see you x

 

[CrazyGiraffeLady]

It’s mums funeral soon, already can’t be arsed with people that made no effort with mum when she was here. Really feeling myself going off the rails slowly

 

[Bananabadger]

Really panicky and anxious from family conflict today - not involving me but I'm worried I'll get caught up in it as the person involved (who is deservedly upset) can turn on others.

 

[skronkywildcat]

How are things @CrazyGiraffeLady ?

 

[CrazyGiraffeLady]

How are things @CrazyGiraffeLady ?

rit, it’s mums funeral next week and truthfully I don’t want to go, I don’t want it to be the last goodbye

 

[allthingschocolate]

Really fed up I had a 1:1 with my boss today following a review with occupational health last week who recommended that I needed to work from home in the afternoons due to a medical condition, my boss basically is only half meeting that request and isn’t really understanding of the issue?! can they really override OH if this if is what has been advised? She is saying it doesn’t meet the needs of the service (doesn’t care for my health) and basically didn’t give a toss she’s got to discuss it further with HR I’ve tried calling HR today myself but the person that I need to speak with isn’t available has anyone else been in a similar situation and if so did it get resolved? I think I need a new job as my boss is horrible

 

[yogiessexdubs]

Really fed up I had a 1:1 with my boss today following a review with occupational health last week who recommended that I needed to work from home in the afternoons due to a medical condition, my boss basically is only half meeting that request and isn’t really understanding of the issue?! can they really override OH if this if is what has been advised? She is saying it doesn’t meet the needs of the service (doesn’t care for my health) and basically didn’t give a toss she’s got to discuss it further with HR I’ve tried calling HR today myself but the person that I need to speak with isn’t available has anyone else been in a similar situation and if so did it get resolved? I think I need a new job as my boss is horrible

Speak to HR, If you don’t get anywhere with your appointed person, go higher. Your work doesn’t ‘have’ to follow your OT’s guidelines but it’s strongly recommended. Don’t look for another job, you’ll be better off at your current role with the amendments.
Make sure you get things in writing.

 

[allthingschocolate]

Speak to HR, If you don’t get anywhere with your appointed person, go higher. Your work doesn’t ‘have’ to follow your OT’s guidelines but it’s strongly recommended. Don’t look for another job, you’ll be better off at your current role with the amendments.
Make sure you get things in writing.

Thankyou so much I will do, spoke to ACAS and they said I could take out a grievance under the disability act so hoping it will get sorted before it even gets that far

 

[yogiessexdubs]

Thankyou so much I will do, spoke to ACAS and they said I could take out a grievance under the disability act so hoping it will get sorted before it even gets that far

Put a file together of anything you obtain in writing, you may have a discrimination case. I hope once your manager speaks to HR they will realise how silly they’re being not complying.

 

[StatusWoe]

Experiencing a wave of grief over the last week. It comes and goes. Right now it's overwhelming and I can't concentrate on anything other than the person I've lost. I want to take my mind off it, but literally can't think about normal things.

 

[StatusWoe]

rit, it’s mums funeral next week and truthfully I don’t want to go, I don’t want it to be the last goodbye

My heart goes out to you. There are no words. I hope you have support.

 

[or JusRollWithIt]

Experiencing a wave of grief over the last week. It comes and goes. Right now it's overwhelming and I can't concentrate on anything other than the person I've lost. I want to take my mind off it, but literally can't think about normal things.

I’m so sorry. Don’t feel bad for not being able to concentrate. It’s completely normal and you can’t predict the next wave. Let it wash over you and know that it will eventually recede.

 

[Rocket Queen]

Experiencing a wave of grief over the last week. It comes and goes. Right now it's overwhelming and I can't concentrate on anything other than the person I've lost. I want to take my mind off it, but literally can't think about normal things.

Grief is an absolute bleeper. Think this is absolutely normal. It’s too big to ignore and try and go about your normal life. The best advice I got was to feel it, breathe it in and then cry it out. I’m so sorry for your loss but try and take it one day at a time. X

 

[Rocket Queen]

rit, it’s mums funeral next week and truthfully I don’t want to go, I don’t want it to be the last goodbye

I’m thinking of you and sending all the love. x

 

[Kim Mild]

Experiencing a wave of grief over the last week. It comes and goes. Right now it's overwhelming and I can't concentrate on anything other than the person I've lost. I want to take my mind off it, but literally can't think about normal things.

Bit unrelated , but I love your username, it made me smile.

 

[gabbysolis]

Going to hide this as it’s a bit dark/morbid, feel free to skip over!

Spoiler: Grief stuff

I am also dealing with grief after losing a family member at new years. I am back at work which is annoying but probably good for me to have a reason to get up every day. I struggle massively with the thought of them in the coffin underground. I know it’s ’just their body’ but it really panics me at night - as if he might be alive down there my body gets the urge to sprint down to the graveyard. I feel mad.. don’t feel like I can say this to any family members as it’s a bit ‘much’, we don’t really talk about things like this. I’m the emotional one.

 

[StatusWoe]

Bit unrelated , but I love your username, it made me smile.

Aw thanks.

And thank you to @Rocket Queen and @or JusRollWithIt for your replies.

Going to hide this as it’s a bit dark/morbid, feel free to skip over!

Spoiler: Grief stuff

I am also dealing with grief after losing a family member at new years. I am back at work which is annoying but probably good for me to have a reason to get up every day. I struggle massively with the thought of them in the coffin underground. I know it’s ’just their body’ but it really panics me at night - as if he might be alive down there my body gets the urge to sprint down to the graveyard. I feel mad.. don’t feel like I can say this to any family members as it’s a bit ‘much’, we don’t really talk about things like this. I’m the emotional one.

Spoiler

I'm so sorry for your loss. It's awful.

If this helps at all, the thoughts you're having aren't that weird or unusual. Death is a hard thing to comprehend imo, even as an adult. I had the same thing when my grandmother was cremated. It was just the thought of her being alone and not having anyone with her that really got to me. I understand why you wouldn't mention it to your relatives though. Nothing useful to add in terms of advice, but just wanted to say you're not going mad.