Fopperholic #7 By throwing your teddy and rattle, you'll lose your fans to tattle.

[Basketcase]

I’m sorry but is she for bleeping real. Never bought a birthday cake?? She’s been married for how long and has never bought one for her husband? Never bought one for any of her family members or friends? She’s got a rod so far jammed up her arse it’s sticking into her brain.
And even if there’s some reasonable reason why she hasn’t bought a birthday cake in her entire nearly 40 year privileged life, just go out and buy one from ASDA or Waitrose or where ever you go food shopping. I’ve never bought a giant crumpet but I realise that it just takes to pick it up and take it to the till to purchase one.

 

[Apple In My Pie]

I always thought Nikki would have been the type to do a ‘cake smash’ style thing rather than buy a cake. I find cake smashes really wasteful but Nikki by way of being an influencer is wasteful anyway

 

[Rainbowcolours]

I always thought Nikki would have been the type to do a ‘cake smash’ style thing rather than buy a cake. I find cake smashes really wasteful but Nikki by way of being an influencer is wasteful anyway

Plus she wouldn't have to eat it

 

[Apple In My Pie]

Plus she wouldn't have to eat it

Might inhale a crumb though

 

[DishtheDirt]

Wow!! That's some routine!
I mean, obviously its great to have a feeding and sleeping routine but my God, it seems there a certain time to do everything, like even having water!!
Theres not much time to eat lunch, its served at 11.30 and then down for a nap at 11.45, they eat faster than me!
And a roll about naked before bedtime? So at no other point in the day when having their nappy changed they are allowed a kick about?
Very odd if you ask me!

 

[theeyeroller]

She just gets worse and worse, who in their right mind has never bought a birthday cake? Just go buy a bloody cake or order one from a cake maker in your area, it’s not difficult. Does she have no idea how ridiculous she makes herself look? It’s embarrassing!

 

[InstaLurk]

I mean even if she’s never bought one.... she’s been PAST a bakery, or even the bakery aisle in a supermarket and knows that’s where cakes come from...she also knows how to buy an endless amount of other shite.... confused as to what part of the “cake buying process” she really can’t grasp!

Paying for it..

 

[hunatron]

Long time reader here, I also found this website by googling 'fopperholic annoying' as after following her for not very long quickly became exasperated by almost everything she does and stands for, and I am also not a 'fat jealous hater'. These threads have given me life ladies. She spends so much time with her phone glued to her hand surely she is aware of the internet (eye roll) and a little search engine called google (prolonged eye roll) and can type in words along the lines of 'local professional cake maker'. Or just do what everyone else does and buy a £5 tesco tray bake or a sodding Colin from M&S for crying out loud. It's a 1st Birthday party, no one will give a stuff about what sort of cake is there, surely it's just a gesture. Also, she's on instagram 24/7, you'd think she'd be able to find a bakery that way. It makes me want to weep that someone that's trying to brand themselves as an 'expert' (not sure in what exactly) can't even buy a Birthday cake for a 1 year old child, sorry children, she has twins how could I have forgotten. Arrrrgggghhhhhhhhhh!

 

[Birdy60]

Yep exactly no way she has nearly reached 40 and not bought a single birthday cake . Is that cause she restricts herself so much she doesn’t buy the husband a cake Incase she goes crazy and eats a slice heaven forbid .

How has she never ever experienced buying a birthday cake? It's like saying you have never watched "Home Alone"......has she never bought a cake when she was in uni along with all them pizzas and pints? She will just have to get the caterpillar cake like the rest of us in Asda instead of begging for a freebie....,,

 

[ChubClubThug]

Fooking hell a resident in HMP has a less rigid routine than those boys.. And better food .... I don't like to make comments about other people's children normally but I have to say compared to my child (they're nearly the same age) even when he was 9 months he would have not sat still at all. Or have been so quiet... they are the most placid, docile babies I have ever seen. All I can say is they must be camera shy??? Considering she can afford to do things other parent's cannot (classes, swimming etc) It doesn't seem to have made much difference. Plus don't twins normally bounce off each other and chatter in their own language and communicate? We have twins in our family and they were extra lively as they helped each other. She just keeps shocking us all on the daily with her ridiculous life. Who are these pple loving her content

 

[Notothefakes]

If you're not strict with a routine then what's the point?
Isn't this like the 4th or 5th routine based video? What. Is. The. Point.
We have a routine it's called 'life' and we just crack on with it every day without harping on about it ffs.

See this kind of stuff as a new mum would have panicked me a lot! My first had no routine during the day. He wasn’t so bad at night but in the day he was hungry when he was hungry and honestly people telling me about routine panicked me! I wish somebody had said to me you just get up and crack on with it. Luckily with my second I was far more relaxed. But all these videos bring back my anxiety and it worries me that non qualified people are out there influencing first time mums who are vulnerable whatever age they are. I was 29 so not young and this stuff would have influenced me massively.

 

[Salmonshirt]

The birthday cake post is a quite obvious blag for a freebie! Given how much she loves Billie Faiers et al I imagine she will be going for some way OTT birthday party!

 

[Catwinky]

Never bought a birthday cake? Either she’s lying again or her disordered way of eating is far more present than anticipated

I'm genuinely suprised she isn't making them a giant mugcake myself.
'This UH-mazing birthday cake for my twin boys comes on as 1 hexb and 2 syns per slice!! 2 syns for the cooked fruit!'

 

[Wingingmotherhood]

My observations on her latest routine video:

Those boys eat a lot of yoghurt!
That routine might work for a 10 month old but it would not work for a 14 month old. It’s a massive age gap at that age! Most babies also drop a milk feed by 1 so the routine is then redundant. My daughter has just turned 12 months and has pretty much dropped her morning nap which I believe is normal, and doesn’t have milk during the day.
Why does she bang on about a protein based lunch. They’re babies & don’t need to be on a diet!
Crawling about.
I also love how she had to explain that naked time was time without their nappies on

I also howled when she said ‘it may need tweaking but when you’re in tune with your baby you will know when it does’ says the woman who paid for a routine from an ‘expert’

Also the birthday cake - I’m surprised she’s not just doing a massive mug cake. Very little protein in Birthday cake!!!

 

[Wowwwwwwwww]

I really wish mother’s wouldn't post so many photos and videos of their babies on PUBLIC profiles. Makes me feel really uneasy.

Is she a weight loss/SW account or what

 

[SHarris]

Will we get this video any time soon, I think not.100% she would have posted it already as she does with every other aspect of her life trying to persevere she has this perfect life

 

[AllTheHunsBeHunning]

Wow!! That's some routine!
I mean, obviously its great to have a feeding and sleeping routine but my God, it seems there a certain time to do everything, like even having water!!
Theres not much time to eat lunch, its served at 11.30 and then down for a nap at 11.45, they eat faster than me!
And a roll about naked before bedtime? So at no other point in the day when having their nappy changed they are allowed a kick about?
Very odd if you ask me!

She's bleeping mental

See this kind of stuff as a new mum would have panicked me a lot! My first had no routine during the day. He wasn’t so bad at night but in the day he was hungry when he was hungry and honestly people telling me about routine panicked me! I wish somebody had said to me you just get up and crack on with it. Luckily with my second I was far more relaxed. But all these videos bring back my anxiety and it worries me that non qualified people are out there influencing first time mums who are vulnerable whatever age they are. I was 29 so not young and this stuff would have influenced me massively.

Absolutely!! It's insane to expect a baby/child to follow a routine, never mind two simultaneously - they're human beings with emotions, not robots.

She's legit got mh issues. I don't know why a hcp hasn't picked up on it or called her out on exploiting her kids daily on social media. It's barbaric.

 

[Londongirl5382]

I really wish mother’s wouldn't post so many photos and videos of their babies on PUBLIC profiles. Makes me feel really uneasy.

Is she a weight loss/SW account or what

I agree. Anyone that cares about their kids and puts them first, would not be doing this. This shows how shallow she is and desperate for a bit of fame/money.

She should just stick to the cult that is Slimming World and people might find that helpful.

 

[JRHD11]

See this kind of stuff as a new mum would have panicked me a lot! My first had no routine during the day. He wasn’t so bad at night but in the day he was hungry when he was hungry and honestly people telling me about routine panicked me! I wish somebody had said to me you just get up and crack on with it. Luckily with my second I was far more relaxed. But all these videos bring back my anxiety and it worries me that non qualified people are out there influencing first time mums who are vulnerable whatever age they are. I was 29 so not young and this stuff would have influenced me massively.

Completely agree with you. I was 29 with my first and always seemed to be worried about routine and her videos on routine would’ve only stressed me out more. Baby number 2 is here now and 11 weeks old and I follow his lead. I also worry that impressionable mums will watch her videos and then follow her ‘advice’; the best thing they could do is avoid her routines with a barge pole!

 

[lexiloo]

she'll be selling her routines next........fopper boot camp my lord!!!...eat at 11.30 be in bed for a nap by 11.45....i don't care if you are still chewing its 11.45 go, go, go!!!