Fathering Autism #5 Asa lies and Priscilla cries

[zazaza]

It seems like he thinks of his daughter and her mother as a unit. She was part of his "troubled past" so he'll punish her by extension. If the mom was THAT adamant about him not being involved or even seeing her and he wasn't interested, would a judge have really given him partial custody? Idk how the system works but that seems really weird. If I had to guess, maybe he caused a stink about getting custody and getting involved in her life but then never followed through and ghosted.

you're absolutely right. to him it's a mess he wants to sweep under the rug.

my guess, complete conjecture and could be totally wrong, is that she didn't tell him in the first place because she remembered him as being married (or separated at the time, but still, he had a wife and kid in another state), and also had whatever brush with the law that happened at the same time, so he clearly wasn't in a great place in his life, and that's why she didn't contact him earlier in the child's life. once paternity was established I'm guessing it was an arrangement where she said if he wanted a relationship they could pursue that (otherwise why wouldn't she specifically request full custody? why would he be allowed legal visitation?) but by that point he was already back in his marriage, had Abbie - would she have been in the early stages of being diagnosed at that time? I can't remember how old she was - and just wanted the whole thing to just disappear. they weren't part of his family unit that he had committed himself to by this point. it was easier to just pay the payments and not think about it, or them, any further.

 

[jadedandcaffeinated]

you're absolutely right. to him it's a mess he wants to sweep under the rug.

my guess, complete conjecture and could be totally wrong, is that she didn't tell him in the first place because she remembered him as being married (or separated at the time, but still, he had a wife and kid in another state), and also had whatever brush with the law that happened at the same time, so he clearly wasn't in a great place in his life, and that's why she didn't contact him earlier in the child's life. once paternity was established I'm guessing it was an arrangement where she said if he wanted a relationship they could pursue that (otherwise why wouldn't she specifically request full custody? why would he be allowed legal visitation?) but by that point he was already back in his marriage, had Abbie - would she have been in the early stages of being diagnosed at that time? I can't remember how old she was - and just wanted the whole thing to just disappear. they weren't part of his family unit that he had committed himself to by this point. it was easier to just pay the payments and not think about it, or them, any further.

I think that's a good guess at how things went down.

Remember in the Victim Vid where he said something like "Who knows how it would have gone if [the mom] handled the situation differently" Well someone isn't being completely honest here. Does the mom not want you inolved? Or do you not want to be involved? Because the court records say you have visitation and partial custody so I'm not buying that the mom isn't the reason you're involved Asa.

 

[Stripe69]

you're absolutely right. to him it's a mess he wants to sweep under the rug.

my guess, complete conjecture and could be totally wrong, is that she didn't tell him in the first place because she remembered him as being married (or separated at the time, but still, he had a wife and kid in another state), and also had whatever brush with the law that happened at the same time, so he clearly wasn't in a great place in his life, and that's why she didn't contact him earlier in the child's life. once paternity was established I'm guessing it was an arrangement where she said if he wanted a relationship they could pursue that (otherwise why wouldn't she specifically request full custody? why would he be allowed legal visitation?) but by that point he was already back in his marriage, had Abbie - would she have been in the early stages of being diagnosed at that time? I can't remember how old she was - and just wanted the whole thing to just disappear. they weren't part of his family unit that he had committed himself to by this point. it was easier to just pay the payments and not think about it, or them, any further.

What a prince

 

[jadedandcaffeinated]

What a prince

Worlds' Best Dad!!! AND Husband!!!!!!

 

[LolzWatcher]

It seems like he thinks of his daughter and her mother as a unit. She was part of his "troubled past" so he'll punish her by extension. If the mom was THAT adamant about him not being involved or even seeing her and he wasn't interested, would a judge have really given him partial custody? Idk how the system works but that seems really weird. If I had to guess, maybe he caused a stink about getting custody and getting involved in her life but then never followed through and ghosted.

A father just like a mother has rights unless proven they should not in a court of law.

 

[jadedandcaffeinated]

I am confident that if he was finding out NOW (instead of 2010) that he had a daughter, now that they're in the public eye, he would make every possible effort he could to see her and fight to see her so he could uphold his image and make that juicy content. Too much time has passed for him to do that now, and attempting to get in contact with her would just make it obvious that he neglected her for years. His kids are pawns, his relationship with all of them is all about what does the best numbers.

 

[Hotographer512]

Worlds' Best Dad!!! AND Husband!!!!!!

Yeah.
#couplegoals with a mfer like him.

 

[jadedandcaffeinated]

Yeah.
#couplegoals with a mfer like him.

The amount of grown ass women crushing on him and thirsting in the comments is... something. Good news though ladies, he cheats! There might be a chance! lol

 

[Shell_Bell]

Dear Isaiah (If you are reading this),
It's clear you are DONE with the BS in your home and your dysfunctional family, my wish for you is RUN. You leave for college in 6 months, when that time comes, please drop the BrotheringAutism, live YOUR OWN life and pursue YOUR OWN dreams. If you want to meet your other sister, you have every right to do so, and I think you would love to foster that relationship, but don't want to hurt your parents. Remember, you are not them, you are your own person, and you deserve to have a normal life, you deserve it. Just wanted to say that. Now back to regularly scheduled snarking.

 

[Hotographer512]

We know he has been reading here for months by the way he casually brings up that are discussed here then quickly explains things away on his channel.
He is too narcissistic to actually consider anything we say here might have some value, even after acknowledging half heartedly in the victim video that we were intelligent people.
Just a random thought.

 

[Buggaboo3523]

I have to wonder if there's a certain point where "learning new skills" just makes life harder on everyone, including Abbie. I understand wanting to push her to grow and do more, but when you're teaching a child to do things, there's generally an expectation that they will progress. Why are they concerned about her unloading dishwasher or putting groceries away? It's pretty obvious she won't be able to do these tasks herself, nor does she want to. She's never going to be able to live independently. Instead of stressing the whole family out multiple times a week teaching her "skills" that aren't sticking, wouldn't it be in everyone's best interest to build a life around the realities of her abilities? She's not going to progress much into her adult years, shouldn't they be preparing long-term to live with someone who has the abilities of a toddler? If she's not going to be able to do chores independently and she doesn't get any satisfaction in "helping" do those chores, why have her do them?? What is she learning? They get hung up on her doing specific tasks that aren't really benefiting her or them at all, but they act like it's important for her to work on them on principle.

No... They should be pushing her to learn life skills. Why would they not?? She's perfectly about to learn how to do tasks. And teaching her things like unloading a dishwasher and print away groceries is not too you're her into their personal servant, it's real life things that she should learn so that if one day she lives in a group home setting after they are gone, she will be able to assist with chores and have some responsibility. She will never be a touch adult, but that doesn't mean they should just have her sit in a room and do nothing.

 

[jadedandcaffeinated]

No... They should be pushing her to learn life skills. Why would they not?? She's perfectly about to learn how to do tasks. And teaching her things like unloading a dishwasher and print away groceries is not too you're her into their personal servant, it's real life things that she should learn so that if one day she lives in a group home setting after they are gone, she will be able to assist with chores and have some responsibility. She will never be a touch adult, but that doesn't mean they should just have her sit in a room and do nothing.

I never said she should sit in her room and do nothing. I've discussed teaching her appropriate things at her level in a ton of posts. Frankly I don't think she'll ever be capable of living in a group home and contributing that way though.

And she's not "perfectly capable" of learning those tasks. They've worked on them for years and she still needs to be guided hand over hand and instructed through every step. She doesn't understand the concept of responsibility and contributing to a household. The chores and tasks they focus on are way above her understanding and I don't think they're beneficial to her.

 

[Hotographer512]

No... They should be pushing her to learn life skills. Why would they not?? She's perfectly about to learn how to do tasks. And teaching her things like unloading a dishwasher and print away groceries is not too you're her into their personal servant, it's real life things that she should learn so that if one day she lives in a group home setting after they are gone, she will be able to assist with chores and have some responsibility. She will never be a touch adult, but that doesn't mean they should just have her sit in a room and do nothing.

You ask why would they not.
Maybe because it takes too much effort. And time.
And let's not forget she's most likely more IDD than autistic so "learning" and retaining information is much more difficult for her. I believe that "pushing" her would just be cruel.
And afterall, they work 80 hours a week.
#toolazyandbusyimo

 

[Valentine]

So, I seriously hope that Child Support Orders can be backdated to when A started earning. That support order was based on him being unemployed, they had no income details for him, so I believe it was worked out based on min wage at the time for 35 hrs a week? The girl has been missing out, it's wrong.

 

[Librarywench]

I agree. Not blaming or saying that he Would but, kids are kids. She would let anybody do anything to her and not know the difference. Apparently when Priscilla is in the shower, Abbie busts in, gets undressed and gets in. And her father bathes her, and now Summer. What is just right out there is that, Abbie doesn't know how to 'act proper' or, act in a certain way. At Target, if she's tored? She lays on the floor in a dirty store. If she likes water, she jumps in the pool,no matter the temp. Abbie is 15 years old and has 'evening's now. I'm not trying to be gross but, why does she want to shower with her mother? She makes herself vomit! She doesn't know what's right or wrong so,how do we know that Abbie doesn't run all over everyone and they don't show it!! My friend has a 30 yr old severely autistic son who, stays near the dirty laundry so he can.....in them. I'm being honest. Who stops her?

This is just my opinion on the bathing. I remember back when I was a fan of FA, they left Abbie with Isiah to go out one evening. When they returned Abbie was in her pajamas. At that time, I thought...not good to have her brother bathing or dressing her. Just not good. He was a young teen and Abbie was developing.

I see no problem with Abbie bathing or showering with her mother. I see no problem with Asa bathing/assisting her. I see no problem with Summer bathing/assisting her but should NOT be bathing or showering with her.

 

[jadedandcaffeinated]

So, I seriously hope that Child Support Orders can be backdated to when A started earning. That support order was based on him being unemployed, they had no income details for him, so I believe it was worked out based on min wage at the time for 35 hrs a week? The girl has been missing out, it's wrong.

Yeah it was based on something like $600/wk .... they're bringing in more than that daily now.

 

[NeedTeaSis]

And she's not "perfectly capable" of learning those tasks. They've worked on them for years and she still needs to be guided hand over hand and instructed through every step. She doesn't understand the concept of responsibility and contributing to a household. The chores and tasks they focus on are way above her understanding and I don't think they're beneficial to her.

Exactly. And a lot of what she has been taught, she doesn't do with purpose. Hand washing for instance, she just dangles her hands under running water and half assed pretends to rub them together.

 

[whyme1982]

This may have already been stated and I'm late to the game, but I went and watched the video they did during vlogmas "the story of us" and "autism early years, our story". So clearly they leave out all the parts about him not wanting to be married anymore and getting another woman pregnant, but what I did note by doing the math, is that while this other woman was raising a one year old, Priscilla was giving birth to Abbie. His second child with this other woman would have been 5 months old when he got Priscilla pregnant. So in their video's when they say "we were trying and trying and trying to have another child and nothing was working" is really...."we were fighting and fighting and I left and had an affair".

I speculate here, but maybe the other woman was ignored just like he tried to do to Priscilla when they first met. In "the story of us" video they talk about how he just stopped contacting her and she finally had to have her parents get a hold of him on the boat. He was blowing her off until he found out she was pregnant and then most likely forced by parents to do the right thing. I wonder if the other woman was told to back off, he was married, this would be bad....go away....etc. She may have tried to pursue it and he tried desperately to keep her a secret until someone convinced her she needed to seek support. That happens a lot when the other women finds out about other children born into the relationship. They start feeling like outcast and that their child is missing out. I don't know....we may never know...and honestly I'm not sure why I care at all. *shrug*

 

[Valentine]

This may have already been stated and I'm late to the game, but I went and watched the video they did during vlogmas "the story of us" and "autism early years, our story". So clearly they leave out all the parts about him not wanting to be married anymore and getting another woman pregnant, but what I did note by doing the math, is that while this other woman was raising a one year old, Priscilla was giving birth to Abbie. His second child with this other woman would have been 5 months old when he got Priscilla pregnant. So in their video's when they say "we were trying and trying and trying to have another child and nothing was working" is really...."we were fighting and fighting and I left and had an affair".

Well noticed. Yeah their story is full of holes.

Exactly. And a lot of what she has been taught, she doesn't do with purpose. Hand washing for instance, she just dangles her hands under running water and half assed pretends to rub them together.

Yeah she doesn't brush her teeth properly either. I'm sure she's been doing that with or without assistance since she was very young, if she hasn't learned how to do it properly by now, she won't. That is a realistic circumstance for her. She does do it, but it's halfhearted and won't be getting cleaned properly. With the sugar she eats, that is a concern. I expect self-care like that will always need assistance.

 

[NeedTeaSis]

Interesting to note that when Isiah messaged LGM is he asked her politely not to say things about his mom. Didn’t say a word about his Dad. Very telling. I feel so bad for that young man.

What I also thought was weird was how he messaged her that, but LGM actually never said anything bad about Priscilla to begin with.