Hello to everyone here. I'm a lurker who found this site after the whole "other daughter" controversy broke. Even before that, I was very much on my way out the door as far was watching their channel was concerned. Their noticeable inconsistency regarding healthy diet and disciplining Abbie was starting to get to me even before their big move into the new house.
Anyways, I decided I wanted to add my two sense on some of Abbie's behaviours. While I'm aware Abbie is I.D.D and Autism, the likes of Carly Fleischmann were also thought to have significant intellectual impairments. Many of Carly's behaviours mirror Abbie's, from the food stealing, to the ripping sheets off of beds, to the eloping, staring off into space, and so forth.
Here is quote from her father Arthur Fleischmann, who gave a talk at Holland-Bloorview hospital in Toronto on the subject of Carly:
"Carly talked a bit about the early days when she would hit herself, and she would say, 'Sometimes it was because I was in pins and needles. I was in a lot of pain; but sometimes, I was trying to stop myself from doing what I knew I wasn't supposed to do. So if I had the urge to dump something or break something, you would see me hit myself, and it's cause I didn't want to do it'. And she would cry, and say 'I'm so upset because I know I'm not supposed to do it'. And everyone's telling me, 'That's naughty. Don't do that, Carly. Don't do that". And again, she's going, 'I know. Like I know not to do it. Can't you help me stop doing it'. And so you can imagine the frustration of a life where she's compelled to do these things, and everyone's scolds her like she's naughty, and like, that's not helping. So she's scolding herself, and she's frustrated, and in pain.."
Mr Fleischmann mentions in the same speech that the food stealing and ripping sheets off of beds thing was a compulsion Carly's brain was screaming at her, rather than the impulsive bad behaviour of a younger child. If she didn't obey the compulsion, it would physically hurt her.
There have been times in previous vlogs where Abbie is hitting herself for seemingly no reason. In one old vlog, Brandy is over for therapy. Cilla is next to Abbie who is hitting herself off camera (Asa says as much). They claim they hadn't denied her anything; yet here she is banging on her legs. Is it for the same reason as Carly? Who knows. Maybe she's trying to resist a compulsion like Carly was. We can't say for certain she wasn't. We just don't know.
Carly herself gave an interview where she said the following:
Question: Can you describe how you feel inside? Do you think this is different from kids who don't have Autism?
Carly: The problem is I don't know what other kids without autism are feeling. I have fights with myself every day. Right when I wake up to when I go to sleep. I can't even go in the washroom without telling myself not to pick up the soap and smell it or fight with myself not to empty all the shampoo bottles."
So again, we must ask ourselves the question: how many of Abbie's behaviours is she really unaware of? When she dumps things over or constantly grabs other people's food, she may be more aware than we're willing to admit.
Carly also ventures onto the topic of why Autistic kids appear to cry or laugh for no reason.
Question: Do you ever scream for what seemed like no reason? Like you showed a happy face, and everything was calm and relaxed, but you just start screaming? My daughter sometimes does it and I am trying to figure out why. Thanks!
Carly: I love this question. She is audio filtering and breaking down sounds noises and conversation throughout the day. Other than screaming, you might see crying or laughing fits and even anger. It's our reaction from finally understanding things that were said and done last min; last day, last month. She is fine and tell her to keep it up.
How many times have we seen this with Abbie? The laughing fits and crying for no apparent reason (eg. the fairground vlog, where she's crying at the end, where Asa says Abbie all of a sudden got upset for no reason).
Special needs activist and documentary film maker Dan Habib has always said, "Assume competency". His son Samuel has cerebral palsy, and is wheelchair bound. People constantly talk to Samuel like he's a child, which apparently pisses him off to no end. Dan Habib has encountered many special needs individuals, including those with I.D.D and Autism, throughout his career, who were talked to like babies when they were absorbing everything.
Cilla, Assa, and Summer constantly speak to Abbie like she's a baby. More so Cilla and Summer, than Asa. If it ever comes out that Abbie is more aware, God will they feel badly, and so they should.
Furthermore, Temple Grandin's mother has stressed the importance of consistency when it comes to schooling kids with Autism, like her daughter. Something A and P sorely lack.
Good grief, she looks wasted and Slummer's smile reads *awkward/embarrassed/cringe*.
’s reaction
momma yesterday she called her nails, her "quarantine nails".she would be better off in an institution. Shall we go back to the fifties?
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