Im so glad it’s helped other people - it’s certainly been helpful for us. Mumsnet hasn’t got tit on tattle life. I can’t thank people enough for their comments and advice. It’s only by taking a step back and considering what people like yourself said that I can see that it makes total sense.... lots of little barbed comments over the years, seemingly illogical behaviour, probably all makes sense in the context that they have createdWhat did I tell you in my commentI think you’ve hit the nail on the head. Some people are a) nosy AF and b) don’t like to see young people do well for themselves! There’s nothing wrong with receiving an inheritance and using it to invest in your future. Leave the fence if you can, but you could always put one up inside theirs if you wanted to!
Our same neighbours that I mentioned earlier in the thread mentioned that we had let the hedge grow too high and the neighbours before never let it grow that far before (find that hard to believe as they didn’t lift a finger inside or out by the looks of it to us) - I told her the hedge was too wide for us to be able to cut all of it! They have cut it once in the whole time we have lived here (last month, in lockdown, when they realised having a nice bit of outdoor space might be useful). This thread has also helped me realise we don’t need to be best mates with our neighbours and to just get on with our lives
Ultimately very sad that for some individuals they go through life deriving pleasure from being awful to others!
The neighbour who in a very loose sense knew my mum came out and in conversation asked my mum straight out how we had afforded our house (we bought a semi, in Surrey at the ages of 23 and 29). My mum answered stupidly now in hindsight (but I think she was caught off guard by such a personal question) that my husband had had some inheritance. This is in part true - a not insignificant sum of money left to him with strict instructions it was to be spent on a house deposit - but whilst we were incredibly lucky to be in this situation we had both worked hard and spent very little money in the years leading up to buying the house to be able to afford what we set our hearts on - our mortgage meant that we were very careful with money and budgeting. I am sure that we were gossiped about and assumptions made very early on Fast forward to a Christmas party a few months later and our neighbour the other side turns up pissed and again, in hindsight asked a whole load of inappropriate and personal questions - we were naive at the time and didn’t think much of it, after all had probably had a few drinks ourselves - her questions were odd though and despite exchanging pleasantries have always behind closed doors known that both sides were odd. In the last two years as previously explained triggered by building work and then getting gradually worse the situation is now pretty dire - shouting over the fence at us ‘nobody here likes you, you should just move’ - this is from a mother of 4 children and the other side making eye contact with, but ignoring my husband saying hello. Although seemingly nothing, we knew the relationship with shouty mum of four family was over but thought the other side had adopted a ‘stay out of the politics approach - fair. When they ignored us so obviously it was very upsetting to think that perceptions of us had been shaped by lies - coupled with that other people we have never spoken to who seem friendly with other neighbours also being frosty when exchanging pleasantries. With limited social interaction over the last few months it upset me to think our neighbours think so little of us.
