EmmyLou Loves #110 LazyLou and the $161318.44 tax debt

[suelynqueen]

Oh my giddy aunt. I know Jason well and he has made me dresses in the past. I am going to do some investigating… stay tuned fezzas

 

[SnarkyTart]

I'm not going to shit all over people serving snags on Chrissie Day in Australia. For some, maybe that's simply all their budget will allow. For others, maybe they just like that, or it's part of a low key tradition We can't all be culture vultures. However, I can and will poke fun at Emmylou pretending to be a Michelin Man star chef, presenting all these bewdiful, gawjus plagiarised recipes when we know damn well her kids are getting burnt lips and arseholes on the bbq come the 25th of December.

For the record, during a depressive episode about a decade ago, we had packet steamed dimmies following a huge panic attack on the way to my family's Xmas lunch. I couldn't face seeing so many people, my daughter was 9 months old and I wasn't coping, so we turned the car around and went home. I won't ever judge what someone serves up UNLESS they are a flabby, fraudulent influencer!

 

[#Super Cute]

On the 9th day of Xmas my Cutie gave to me….

 

[screenfreelookatme]

Okay tell me she didn’t actually write this in the ebook

 

[#Super Cute]

On the 10th day of Xmas my Cutie gave to me….

 

[massive eye roll]

Well played Sally Tate, well played

 

[SnarkyTart]

Dear Tribe,

When Aaron left us, I pulled the doona over my head and Dutch ovened myself. I whispered "You've got this Mumma" and between the smell of my breath, my unwashed body and my gas under the musty sheets, I fell back into a fat nap. When I woke up, I put on my Afro beats Spotify playlist, sized down into a bewdiful Effie Kats number and went down to my local Woolies for some retail therapy. When life gives you clams, hang them on your farken wall and celebrate how special you think you are. Focus 100% on yaself, fuck The Children, fuck the ATO - follow your dreams and keep pissing your money away on vanity projects to fill the gaping void in your blackened soul

Love Emmylou.

P.s. my ebook is still for sale on my website for $9.95. I worked really hard on it and I'm so broke proud and it would mean the world to me if you treated yourself to a copy.

 

[SnarkyTart]

Yeah, nah. You didn't give a flying fuck about stability. You never have. Who got the kids to and from school and sports? ALove and Leah.

Laying the groundwork for her upcoming ATO battles - "I didn't mean to not pay my taxes, I was just trying to get through one day at a time whilst grieving."

Always the victim. Placing the blame back on "the trolls" to try and play the sympathy card with her communidy.

Shoutout to our very own fezza on the scene @gemmagucci

Attempting to minimise the domestic abuse she heaped upon Aaron throughout the duration of their relationship. And also placing blame on him. Despicable.

Funny how she only ever plays up the communidy aspect when she's hustling. Mumma don't wanna know the plebs when she's swanning around Melbourne chasing but when she's gotta make a dollar, it's all kumbaya let's be farken besties.

I also call BULLSHIT on her having to take two years to comprehend and grieve the bust up between her and ALove. That relationship had been on the rocks more times than Johnnie farken Walker. How many times did they separate and live under the same roof, subjecting their children to tension and trauma. Please, spare us, bitch. This self serving waffle of hers makes me sicker than her gross looking banoffee.

 

[Michy02]

Buy my ebook

 

[makeitstop]

Jezus there wouldn’t be many people that pink baby doll dress would look good on. Reminds me of that other dress she wore, I don’t have a pic, the one where her flappers were hanging/smooshed below the seam? Seasoned fezzas will know the one.

This little beauty ……

 

[#Super Cute]

 

[ActiveLies]

This might be real niche, but does anyone remember that episode of Seinfeld where George starts eating mid-coitus and then his brain confuses the enjoyment of sex and food into one experience and he starts getting all hot under the collar while eating at a cafe? Coz I swear that’s were I’llHaveWhatShesHavingLou has gotten to. Food genuinely seems to arouse her. She dresses sexy for food. She flirts with food. She fondles food. She makes very strange statements about her enjoyment of food and you can’t tell me she’s not indulging in fistfuls of cheezels or the like while having fistfuls of herself late at night between posting quotes on Insta.

 

[somanyteeth]

Have we heard Lou sing yet? Come on Emmy, we know you read here! You've already been extremely generous releasing your ebook for only $9.95 but 'tis the season to give and we would be ever so grateful to hear you hittin' the farken high notes! We're not fussy either, so it doesn't have to be an original composition, a cover will suffice. Patiently waiting

Have we ever! Did you forget about this rap god?

**side note, when I need to search emmy I click on her face in my google pics and holy fuck i feel like a creepy stalker but its just such a great Vault of her idiocy.
---
Fuck, I just gave myself secondhand embarrassment watching her jiggle like a trifle @leaky_beaky Maybe dont watch

 

[#Super Cute]

bUy mY eBoOk

 

[Director of Mugs]

 

[RojoCaliente]

#111 suggestion: Flashing clit on Branson's ship, dodgy ebook full of shit, fingernails of salmonella, the ATO's about to get ya!

 

[dickehead]

Thanks for saying this. That other post bagging anyone who serves sausages on Christmas Day really upset me. We are doing a BBQ on Christmas Day - we’ll have chops, burgers, prawns and yes, sausages with lots of different salads etc. I am far too anxious to try to cook a turkey or anything fancy. If my visitors don’t like my bbq then they can host it themselves next year!

Your Christmas day sounds absolutely wonderful and i am sure most fezzas here are super aware that we will all do things that work for us and our budgets. Any shade we throw at this scrag is because she is such a shit and not because sausages (or whatever) aren't christmas food.

there have been years where i have been either so poor or so depressed that i was lucky to have a bowl of cereal for my christmas dinner.

Sending so much love to all fezzas! this time of year can be extremely difficult and i am so glad to have this space to hangout with such a bunch of funny, clever and kind people

 

[SnarkyTart]

I've decided that I don't like Braaaaad, however kudos to him for his passive aggressive treatment of Lou yesterday. He straight up called her a filthy animal, and made sure to remind everyone that the cauliflower recipe is his. You see her beady little eyes darting, and a slight moment of panic. With friends like that, who needs enemies?!

 

[slap2fish2gether]

Also, who the fuck cooks their kid a "steak wrap" as an after school "snack"

 

[bigbigsound]

The essence of ChatGPT is strong in this one.

I couldn’t help myself.

Amy’s first tip in the List of Learnings:

Me and ChatGPT: