EmmyLou Loves #108 The dildo of consequence rarely arrives lubed

[StickyTapeTits]

The absolutely fucked-up irony that what she’s doing today will contribute to her kids’ childhood trauma and, inevitably, leave them with their own mental health struggles in the future.

 

[ActiveLies]

BUT WHO DARED HER? She keeps saying she completed a dare. Who? Who suggested a relatively unknown woman walk around Albert Park in her underwear in the middle of an overcast weekday to bring awareness to men’s health?! NOBODY DID.

She would’ve agreed to this paid promotion literally months ago and 3 days out from the end of November realised she actually has to fulfil her commitment if she wants to be paid so pulled out the laziest stunt of all time. She could’ve started doing week days walks for the whole month of November. Told her community to join in, get their friends and families donating per kilometre walked for the month or something like that, but oh no, ol’ LastMinuteLou chucked in an hour of effort in the most attention seeking and self serving way of all time.

Started her day raising money for charity, ended her day - as always - talking about herself and lying her arse off with big gulps and pauses and darting eyes.

 

[screenfreelookatme]

Felt inspired to look back at our old thread titles and came up with my top 5

 

[Broken_vase]

Same same.

 

[Sure…Media!]

“Had a fat nap and smashed half a chicken”



Oh yeah! QUEEN!

Oh I love her

 

[Hereforthecheezels]

Annnd…we’ve dropped to 118K…

 

[StickyTapeTits]

Don’t listen to all these haters Emmylou! You’re fabulous I don’t think there is a single one of these Fezzas who can’t say they’ve made the same mistake at some point. I ALWAYS put my underwear on backwards when I get dressed in the dark too .

We should have all been here to support her but instead we’ve let her down. Shame on you @StickyTapeTits ! Where were you when we needed you the most?

Maaaaaate, I was schleppin’ out to Tulla last night to try and help Sophia Chia’s tits, but I stopped for a kebab and didn’t make it in time. Looks like Chia just used a coupla bulldog clips to attach her flappy baps the lapels of her I’m-a-lesbian statement suit. And Emmy can just roll hers up like a yoga mat because… I’m on holidays! Gonna stick around Tulla and check out some more concrete and bitumen tourist attractions. I’m so jealous I don’t live here.

As Leila would say, I am “Out of Office”, even though I don’t actually have one and don’t actually work.

 

[gotarealjob]

And to top it off she left the “ at the start of the paragraph too, it always provides what it writes in “ LOL. I screen shot so we can now watch it be removed

Just quoting myself to say… she read this and removed the chat gpt “ at the start of her caption from yesterday LOL

 

[ICouldTotallySizeDown]

Comments on her reel are getting spicy now, this has gotta be one of us I reckon that’s going to be deleted, surely and she’ll no doubt stop comments!

 

[Broken_vase]

Should have called her e book “Festive food fondling”

 

[#Super Cute]

You'll just have to buy the ebook, Screeny, for her secret recipes...

Page 12 - Mitsubishi Lamb.
Place lamb in pan and cover in foil. Put on back seat of Mitsubishi (any 4 door vehicle should do, but cooking times may vary). Middle seat is best for even heat distribution. Fasten the pan into place with seatbelt. Crank heater and fang around town for 2 and half hours. Serve with fondled rice.

Page 5 - Couch Bodadoes

1. Grift 24 and a half Desperado bodadoes from gullible local fruit n veg trader after sniffing and fondling entire range.

2. 5 holiday pours of rancid oil from the back of the festy pantry.

3. Keep it local with a heavy dash of salt from a Port Melbourne Beach.

4. Chuck in the grifted Maxi Airfryer and set to auto and have a fat nap.

5. Plate up on the 4 grifted Melamine plates from Catch (spare plates can be found under your ByMay Bag collection).

7. Shotgun the least stained spot on the couch and mark your territory with a fresh fart

9. 2,3,7, mate, Bog In Don’t Wait

 

[Butt3rfly]

That’s better

 

[Sure…Media!]

Don’t listen to all these haters Emmylou! You’re fabulous I don’t think there is a single one of these Fezzas who can’t say they’ve made the same mistake at some point. I ALWAYS put my underwear on backwards when I get dressed in the dark too .

We should have all been here to support her but instead we’ve let her down. Shame on you @StickyTapeTits ! Where were you when we needed you the most?

 

[#Super Cute]

The heat was on with cheesecakegate and we drummed up a stalker.

ATO are onto her and we are now hijacking a “men’s mental health initiative “ to remind everyone of her own experience with poor mental health.

Who said Mumma don’t know how to strategise?

 

[AlovesnewFezza]

Does anyone else think it’s strange that Camelia said “staying with my Mum” when asked what fills your cup. Isn’t that the home she lives in?
Obviously not.

 

[Icantlookaway]

She's so light on her feet... no wonder she got invited to the ballet...

 

[StickyTapeTits]

You’re doing great, sweetie…..

 

[#Super Cute]

Dad and his wife seemed to live a very simple, healthy life and he looked a picture of health for a bloke his age. I remember they looked less than impressed with Amy’s 24/7 filming. Fezza’s were left shaking their heads about what genetic mutation occurred to land Amy. She came home and replicated Dad’s salads for a day and a half before she hit the markets on the third day and made a curry The salads were never mentioned again.

The salads left us

 

[Icantlookaway]

The fact she still has the same bra on, is enough for me to know she didn't have a shower after that walk..

 

[ketchup menace]

Unfortunately, Instagram hid this comment. Or she did, not sure how it all works. Bravo Greg