Dealing with Anxiety

[Snippysnips]

I've had anxiety for the past few years but lately i've noticed my nerves being bad with the slightest little thing that can trigger it I loss control of my temper anything can set my nerves off anyone with a sense of humour around me I can't cope with

I have notice being around calm people lately helps me and have been listening to the sound of rain and waves and peppermint oil really calms me down, along with ambience music is a must to start my day off does anyone know why i'm like this I have a feeling what its down to but rather not say on a forum.

I get like this as well, unfortunately when somthing triggers you the brain sorta makes a memory of whatever triggered it an any future times if you come accross it again because the brain has that memory it sends those messages that you need to act a certain way

I think it comes from the fight or flight in us, you can re-train yourself out of it but you need to know exactly what is causing it an when it happens try an calm yourself as much as possible, it's incredible hard but it does eventually re-train your brain into not reacting in a bad way with the trigger

I hope all that makes sense, am not great at trying to write out what i mean

 

[MrsBsDayOff]

I'm on 10mg a day of escitalopram to control my anxiety (and low mood probably brought on by anxiety) for about 7 years now. Life changing for me although I had to make other changes, for example I went to a therapist also to reframe my thinking. I now try to avoid alcohol for the most part, it makes me feel depressed afterwards. I used to worry about everything now I don't. I would like to try going off meds to see how it feels but not sure it would be a good idea, I reduced my dosage to 5mg a few years ago and it didn't go well for me so back up to 10mg

 

[btw]

I’ve struggled with my mental health since my teenage years but I’d say for the past 2 years I’ve felt my mental health has been manageable and I’ve been a lot more content in myself. However at the minute I’m going through big life changes with finishing university and trying to find a job and I can feel my mental health declining again!

I have my graduation on Wednesday. I feel sick already and filled with anxiety. Every single night for the past week I’ve struggled to sleep and I’ve been awake late at night constantly worrying and overthinking this graduation. It’s nothing to do with worrying about things that probably won’t happen like falling over. It’s just the anxiety of being infront of so many people, really outside of my comfort zone.
Has anyone got any tips for dealing with events like this when you suffer with anxiety? I’m thinking about buying some rescue remedy but I’m not sure how effective it actually is

 

[Ingognito.Queen]

Aw - I'm sorry to hear you're feeling like this and can completely relate.

Whilst at the graduation surrounded by people remember to keep your breathing controlled. Try breathing in for 4 seconds and out for 6 seconds.

Also - remember that other people can’t tell how anxious you are just by looking at you.

If you are as organised as you can be it will make the day flow that little bit better. What I would usually do in a situation like this is try and break the day down as much as possible.
For example:

• At 9am I'll wake up
• At 10am I 'll have a shower
• From 3-4pm I'll get ready.
• From 5-6pm I will travel to the graduation.
• From 6.30 - 8pm the graduation is on.
• At 9pm I will be home and the graduation will be OVER.
• At 9.30pm I can sit down with some snacks and watch a film/tv series.

It keeps my mind consumed with what will be happening AFTER the event. It might help to plan something nice for the day after the graduation.

 

[aidil]

I second what @Ingognito.Queen says! I often find that I get so consumed with my anxiety that the time runs away from me and then I get even more anxious because I’m rushing! So as silly as it sounds, I write down a step by step plan to the day with what I’m doing at each time. And focus on what time I will be able to relax again so I always have it in my head to look forward to.

That moment when you graduate is literally a few seconds, it will be over before you know it.

I think it may be worth you speaking to your doctor beforehand if you can? They can prescribe things like Propranolol for occasions like this to take the edge off. I use it regularly for acute anxiety flare ups and it just keeps the physical symptoms in check so you don’t feel so flustered! You want to be able to enjoy some of this moment because it sounds like you’ve worked so hard for it!

 

[btw]

Thankyou both for your responses! @Ingognito.Queen @aidil It’s really nice to feel heard and understood, I will definitely try to make a plan of the day so I can be focused on the laid back parts of the day instead of the few seconds I’m up there! I hate that anxiety clouds these special moments for me and I’m trying to celebrate the small wins because in all honesty 2 years ago, I wouldn’t of even attended graduation as it would of been too hard. So a small win that I’ve committed to going and fight back the anxiety

 

[House of Tea]

I have developed anxiety over the last year, I suspect it is menopause related but also a few other issues.

Can anybody recommend a good CBT book so that I can at least do a bit of self help. Something not too technical. For a beginner not a practitioner. Or a few articles.

I know I can access CBT through NHS but don’t want to at this time. Thank you.

 

[Ingognito.Queen]

Thankyou both for your responses! @Ingognito.Queen @aidil It’s really nice to feel heard and understood, I will definitely try to make a plan of the day so I can be focused on the laid back parts of the day instead of the few seconds I’m up there! I hate that anxiety clouds these special moments for me and I’m trying to celebrate the small wins because in all honesty 2 years ago, I wouldn’t of even attended graduation as it would of been too hard. So a small win that I’ve committed to going and fight back the anxiety

How did the graduation go?

 

[btw]

How did the graduation go?

It went amazing!! I’m gutted that anxiety clouds so many positive occasions for me and causes so much stress in the run up to events but the day went perfect. I am so glad that I didn’t let my anxiety win and not go because it was a lovely celebration of all our achievements!
Thanks so much for your advice and for checking in again

 

[Ingognito.Queen]

I'm thrilled for you.

 

[polarby]

Hi everyone, thought I would share on hear and asking for some advice! I’ve been suffering with anxiety for about 6 years on and off and never received any professional help outside of some talking therapy with school councillors etc. recently been feeling like my anxiety has been worse, been very tearful and panicky. Firstly Im not sure whether this is enough to justify going to The gp, I’ve had bad and dismissive experiences before so not sure it’s enough to be taken seriously. And then also how do I talk to my mum about this? I’m 17 and still living at home but not sure how to talk about it without being embarrassed or anything. No idea where to start

 

[mcfeez]

Hi everyone, thought I would share on hear and asking for some advice! I’ve been suffering with anxiety for about 6 years on and off and never received any professional help outside of some talking therapy with school councillors etc. recently been feeling like my anxiety has been worse, been very tearful and panicky. Firstly Im not sure whether this is enough to justify going to The gp, I’ve had bad and dismissive experiences before so not sure it’s enough to be taken seriously. And then also how do I talk to my mum about this? I’m 17 and still living at home but not sure how to talk about it without being embarrassed or anything. No idea where to start

In terms of telling your mum or GP, it can help to write down exactly how you are feeling. It will keep it more clear and your less likely to get overwhelmed in the moment. I sympathise so much, I had mental health issues as a teen as well though only realised when I looked back as an adult. You come across quite eloquent here, I think it would be really beneficial for you to speak with your parent as long as you have that sort of relationship with them. Then definitely look at getting to speak to your Dr too

 

[aac_124]

I just hate this feeling thats like I’m dying and just don’t know how to cope with it

 

[aidil]

I just hate this feeling thats like I’m dying and just don’t know how to cope with it

Sad to see your name pop up here my lovely but glad you’re reaching out Have you spoken to a doctor? You can’t keep struggling along by yourself, I worry about you! x

 

[statingfacts123]

I’ve tried searching for a post on this so apologies if there is one already.

Currently I’m suffering with very bad anxiety. For months I’ve been waking very early with a suffocating feeling, my chest tight and heart rate high. At first it would go once I got up and kept busy but recently it’s through the day. I can’t think straight and it’s having a huge effect on everything.

I’ve suffered with anxiety and deep depression in the past but this is completely different. It makes me feel as though a huge weight is on my chest. I try deep breathing,exercise, stretching etc but it’s not helping much

How do you deal with anxiety please?

When I can feel it servicing I say out loud “not now” sometimes it works sometimes it don’t! Anxiety isn’t actually a thing, it’s not real.. it’s created by you and you only.

Ive suffered for over 20 years with severe anxiety but I certainly won’t be suffering another 20 years with it. Anxiety will disappear when you start living your life. You got this x

 

[aac_124]

Sad to see your name pop up here my lovely but glad you’re reaching out Have you spoken to a doctor? You can’t keep struggling along by yourself, I worry about you! x

Yeah I saw my gp a few months ago when things were really bad and they referred me to a councillor and I go once a week or via zoom if I’m working that definitely helps but only really in the moment when I’m talking to her but then when I’m at home or alone I just don’t know how to cope x

 

[aac_124]

This feeling is just so horrible

 

[btw]

Hey everyone , I’m back here again how does everyone cope with anxiety when it comes to job interviews?
I’m struggling at the minute. I finished uni in July and I’m still yet to find a job. The job market I'm finding tough to even hear back from application for interviews.
Today I had an interview, it went terrible. My anxiety and lack of confidence just ate me right up and I crumbled. Stumbled over my words, I didn’t expand enough because I just wanted to shut down. I haven’t heard back from them yet but I know I haven’t got the job because it was the worst interview I’ve ever done. I just feel like I’m fighting a loosing battle. I am considering ringing the doctors tomorrow to see if they can give me any medication to help control my anxiety as it’s beginning to trigger my depression which I’ve managed for the past 2 years.

 

[Ingognito.Queen]

Hey everyone , I’m back here again how does everyone cope with anxiety when it comes to job interviews?
I’m struggling at the minute. I finished uni in July and I’m still yet to find a job. The job market I'm finding tough to even hear back from application for interviews.
Today I had an interview, it went terrible. My anxiety and lack of confidence just ate me right up and I crumbled. Stumbled over my words, I didn’t expand enough because I just wanted to shut down. I haven’t heard back from them yet but I know I haven’t got the job because it was the worst interview I’ve ever done. I just feel like I’m fighting a loosing battle. I am considering ringing the doctors tomorrow to see if they can give me any medication to help control my anxiety as it’s beginning to trigger my depression which I’ve managed for the past 2 years.

First of all - Well done for actually going to the interview.
Job interviews are nerve wrecking, and to be dealing with anxiety and attending a job interview is an achievement. Good for you!

The job interview is done. It's over.

Be kind to yourself.

 

[or JusRollWithIt]

Hey everyone , I’m back here again how does everyone cope with anxiety when it comes to job interviews?
I’m struggling at the minute. I finished uni in July and I’m still yet to find a job. The job market I'm finding tough to even hear back from application for interviews.
Today I had an interview, it went terrible. My anxiety and lack of confidence just ate me right up and I crumbled. Stumbled over my words, I didn’t expand enough because I just wanted to shut down. I haven’t heard back from them yet but I know I haven’t got the job because it was the worst interview I’ve ever done. I just feel like I’m fighting a loosing battle. I am considering ringing the doctors tomorrow to see if they can give me any medication to help control my anxiety as it’s beginning to trigger my depression which I’ve managed for the past 2 years.

Interviews can be very difficult even when you are in a good place mentally. Ask yourself why it went terribly without beating yourself up. Be objective, and look for ways you can better prepare next time.

Sometimes it’s just not your fault and the lack of connection with the interviewer or the vibe they put out can make you needlessly feel badly about yourself. Try to put a bit of a wall up to that, it’s not personal! Some interviewers are power tripping and enjoy making people squirm. See past that. You are qualified and a great potential employee otherwise you wouldn’t be sitting there.

A few things that may help in the future…

* practice answering sample questions, there is a lot of guidance online on how to answer well. Repeat until the answers come easily

* remind yourself that yes you are being interviewed but you’re also there to see if they are a good fit for you. Takes some pressure off as the focus isn’t just on your performance. Have some questions you can ask the interviewer at the end (again, there are examples online of what is appropriate to ask, such as “what’s your favourite thing about working here?” Or “what is the work dynamic here, is it more independent or collaborative?” )

*when you first meet and if you’re feeling visibly nervous, let them know. Don’t dwell, but just say I apologize if I sound nervous. I am excited for this opportunity so thank you for having me.

*it can feel demoralizing to have rejection after an interview, but remember that many people get interviewed and more people get rejected than accepted. It’s not personal and it’s not just you who feels nervous or upset by the process. It’s hard but the more interviews you have, the better you become at them.