Crystal Bailey

[Libertine]

I’m not sure why she needed to share both her small sons crying at, I suppose, her going to Bali or somewhere.

Does she think it demonstrated what a loved and treasured mother she is to her followers? Because the children looked traumatised and she looked selfish to me.

 

[showinguphere]

It’s amazing what you can do when you’re free from distractions because you’re a shit mother who palmed off your parental responsibilities.
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I’m sorry- but did she sticky tape the frames up to the walls, ceilings snd floors instead of bolting them? Not one power tool, Crystal? Not even a drill to bolt things in properly to make them safe???
I’m calling bullshit.
Any guesses as to who the big mystery brand is she is collabbing with? My guess is Sheridan for some really boring sheet designs in beige

 

[Justbeige]

Crystal by name. Crystal by drug of choice.

 

[Libertine]

Does he know he is her boyfriend? The photos of him are all sneaky shots that he doesn’t seem to be aware of being taken and I’m sure he has no idea they are online.

Also, does the old guy have kids? I doubt they are happy/going to be happy to hear rose porteous here has “prayed” for their inheritance and now claiming the resort as hers!

He has children and grandchildren.

 

[ceeshelley]

Also what is this hideous centerpiece? Cut up lemons and limes and candles stuck in a glass of sand. Much designer, so style queen!

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When I first glanced at it I momentarily thought that was tinned tuna in the glasses with the candles! Haha. I don’t know why my head went there instead of sand!

 

[kmartplate]

nothing says true love like hundreds of millions of dollars and a huge age gap. She does realise if he dies it will all go to his kids and not her right? Guess she can enjoy the riches for a few months.

 

[EveryDaysASoulDay]

It’s amazing how many seasons this broad has. Grow up and get some stability in your life, nutter.

 

[Justbeige]

Crystals explaining what curtains do again.

 

[Libertine]

She’s leaving out some key information in her narrative about WHY she only saw her son five times a year.

 

[Stay Classy]

There is so much wrong here on so many levels. I keep forgetting this is a business account. I wonder what her 30k new followers (that she gained from that bunnings collab) must be thinking about this nutcase. Can someone see if she has lost followers since the season that she manifested grandpa? Or maybe the followers are hanging around because they like the look of the resort she prayed for?

 

[WellAndWealthyBossBabe]

Ummm….was she wearing disposable linen? Talk about another opportunity to show “my boyfriend’s got a big laundry”

She’s like Sharon out of Kath and Kim “my boyfriend…..”

 

[lifeispeachy]

can’t she take 2 weeks off her dodgy work to spend with her kids? I’m sure the shopping at ikea and Kmart can wait a week…

 

[Stay Classy]

Nothing more real, raw and relatable than filming yourself crying with no actual tears…

Having an emotional moment….oh, let me pull out my phone and video myself so I can post on insta

 

[showinguphere]

Inspirational chat with Crystal #56
I just wanna say that no one is perfect (eyeflutter, lipstretch) like no one. Look at me I have curtains but I’m not perfect. No one is. Don’t compare yourself to others…I have curtains but (pause) what am I trying to say? Oh! I also have challenges. Everyone has challenges. If you go down you gotta get back up, that’s what I did (eyeflutter, lipstretch), even if you’re a single mum, or a…..single woman…you are strong…you don’t need a man….you are (pause) strong. You gotta get up (BIG eye flutter, squint and lipstretch)

I would rather shoot myself in the foot than take life advice from someone who “authentically” fake cries in front of an iPhone they set up to record it to post on their work Instagram.
These recaps make me giggle tho. Love them.

 

[J0J0]

You can sleep on the beach with kids crystal, it’s called camping. You’d think she would know all about that having slept in a tent for so long 🫠

 

[Justbeige]

I want her drugs and her complete ability to disassociate from reality and completely forget she's a moron.
I don't want her lips, hair or eyebrows.

 

[EveryDaysASoulDay]

Wow. It took her that long to make something this bad.
It looks absolutely nothing like Beauty and the Beast. Was there a single pumpkin in it? Is she confusing her Disney movies? Yikes.

The longer she worked on it the worse it looked. You could tell it just wasn’t coming together for her so she just kept throwing more cheap crap and half-assed DYIs at it, hoping it would look like something cohesive. Major fail.

Hey, Crystal, if you’re reading this … maybe, and hear me out, maybe good design takes a little more effort than spray painting whatever is for sale on FB marketplace the day you roll into town. Preparation and forethought would really help you out. (Methinks you’re still “running hot” as you like to put it) Jumping from one poorly planned project to the other, waiting to do store runs for your product the day-of, pleading for last minute day labor on Insta for help every project. Jeezus girl, you’re a mess.

Funny how she keeps teasing her “luxury design” projects in the pipeline lately (coincidentally after tattlers pointed out that she’s just a glorified DIYer). I can’t even imagine that any client would hire her for luxury design and risk a substantial investment to her cock-ups. This is going to be interesting.

 

[showinguphere]

I reckon she will create her fake wall shelf thing in front of the existing shelves. The table she will put in an unused room or garage or something. But seriously- why bother? She does this everywhere she goes- crafts up some furnishings and thumbtacks up some curtains. Then 5 minutes later she has moved on. Waste of time and money. Take your kid to the park, Disneyland mum, not ikea. You haven’t seen him in ages. Do what you tell everyone you do- take time out to enjoy the little things and your loved ones. Talks the talk but can’t walk the walk. I honestly wouldn’t care except she comes across so superior to us mere everyday mortals. Makes me want to

 

[Luvnaps]

We should all make note of the date Crystal posted this since she thinks she won't be moving again for a "very, very long time". Of course, it's Crystal we're talking about so a 6 month rental to her is probably 6 years.

And, uh Crystal, it's not your place to call home. It's a furnished rental for God's sake.

 

[showinguphere]

Definitely B with some nonstop Insta stories where the kid(s) look uncomfortable & mom is making the stupidest faces, thinking it's the greatest thing ever at WHATEVER they're doing. Just once I'd like to see her NOT post every single thing they're doing & just be PRESENT with the boys.

Not gonna happen.
Looking forward to the awkward guitar solo she performs for them on camera and that little trip down memory lane for the thousandth time