My heart goes out to you and
@xyzcba 
I am so sorry about what you went through. I've had similar experiences with 2 of my children. One who was an emergency c section and very colicky, and also with my daughter when after 3 days of not sleeping, general neglect and not being allowed to go home (I was under observation as a former heart patient) I very nearly had a full on nervous breakdown, which then spiralled into post partum psychosis.
The attitude on the ward was aggressive, unwelcoming and borderline hostile, great way for a baby to meet the world (not)!
Honestly some people should just not be allowed to work on maternity wards or nursing full stop!
Zero empathy, zero respect , absolutely not maternal or caring in any shape or form, loathing any kind of noise or disturbance (hey babies cry
it's their way of communication) instead these mini Hitler's insist on obedience to rules (the more Draconian the better) and order and hygiene, nevermind the real blood and guts and general mess of bodies and birth they just want to sanitise everything and terrify everyone into silence/submission (including kids).
It's horrible, it's violating and it's inhumane, I kicked up a fuss and was labelled a trouble maker and singled out for negative attention (yes bullying on a maternity ward does exist) and one doctor profusely apologised (in the end) and another man actually walked out and left his job, Disgusted at the appalling conditions and treatment of himself and patients in general.
This is in central London as well, supposedly one of the top hospitals, I despair at what I went through and witnessed, put it this way I have seen many lonely, struggling, crying women (some made complaints) and I myself have had pnd more than once (probably triggered by birth trauma and lack of after care) and I bet I wasn't the only one.
If hospitals can't be hospitable (the clue is in the name!) then what hope have we got?
It's their bloody job, they are not doing us a favour and if they are unhappy they should leave then and do something else, instead of taking it out on the patients.
Jeez lots of jobs are stressful, look at bus drivers, cashiers in a supermarket, retail staff etc but you don't see them (usually?) bitching and moaning and taking it out on others and neglecting their duty, because they would be fired for being unprofessional if they did!
So why are NHS staff allowed to and get away with treating people like
tit, and we are supposed to just be passive about it and shrug our shoulders or feel sorry for them, because they have it tough
!
Yes let's put them on a pedestal, bang your dishes (save the NHS hey, but what about the shockingly high number of babies that needlessly die each year through NHS mistakes in their care?) or watch them mass twerking on tick tock....yeah so hard...they were so over worked during the pandemic that they had time to learn and co ordinate dance routines! Jesus wept!
bleeping disgrace some are (far too many), and yes I know it's not everyone, some are really nice and do a proper job but guess what I have been in hospital many times and they are the minority
My point being just because someone works in healthcare doesn't give them a free pass to be dictatorial, and abusive... where's the bedside manner where is the genuine concern for others?
If challenged though it's always the same, they don't have time, they are busy, they are over stretched ,they'll get back to you later etc(true maybe but not our faults) they are stressed (the real victims, martyrs) they are just doing what someone else told them to do, it's health and safety or procedure, or the schedule... and don't you dare inadvertantly break them, (time is money right? Let's not dilly dally... but hang on where are the rules about patients and babies care and well being? Hmmm
Seems like that takes second place, so just shut up and do as you are told....that seems to be the unspoken rule...you can't be the exception to it, who are you right seems to be the general attitude?
No wonder it was so easy to instil in many mass compliance of vaccine mandates, and general thuggery....with such a generally intolerant attitude displayed towards patients on a maternity ward (so right from the start this atmosphere is instilled you're giving birth not ill or incompetent but some can't tell the difference) and then again according to some others , we are all potential patients anyway or carriers of disease or sickness (so that's also where the contradictory attitude of avoidance comes from, because you can be vulnerable but the staff can act like they are allergic to you)..
so you can't win and they hold you at arms length...
COVID didn't make things worse, it was already dire to begin with, and dehumanising on many levels, there should be a mass outcry and protest...it's disgusting but when people are forced into compliance or to be submissive (for survival and probably because they have also been neglected and gaslit) then yes the general consensus will be...obedience and adherence to rules and some will follow it, out of fear.
It's a national disgrace and they forget that we are supposed to have equality and be living in a democracy but where is it?
If you are going to have rules then I would start with the first rule...that babies and mother's at all times, should be treated with care and respect and listened to and consulted and be made to feel welcome and safe and given empathy and privacy and dignity, and that's not asking for much actually that's just being a human being, and that should be the norm.
Shame on hospitals for in many cases not respecting and upholding that most basic and important of human rights, and life itself (that's what babies are new life) which should be sacred but sadly in many cases isn't. (,I judge by the evidence, not just anecdotal,look at the available data/statistics as well and they tell a sad tale)
It's not difficult to see what a devastating impact that can have, not just on mother's but on children (and the future) and society in general and that just shouldn't be acceptable at all.
