Cleaning with Mario #4

[cleaningupthecrap]

Why is he so bloody literal about everything when he sings? The way he does the awful wink and putting his hand on his chest when the lyrics mention love or heart or pointing to the sky if the moon and stars are mentioned.
It's like watching a badly acted pantomime for idiots.

Plus, hands off Lizzo, she ain't for the likes of you Melvin.

 

[MrsEvil]

Oh I think I might have become a little obsessed already with this account. It’s the funniest thing I’ve watched in ages. It’s surely got to be a parody?

My husband has just asked me if I’ve been talking to my family today (I’m from around where Mario lives but now in London) as I’ve already said ‘wee guy fae paisley’ ‘hoose’ ‘cooncil’ and ‘wan’ today. I don’t think I even spoke like that when I lived there

 

[Kikini Bamalam]

He is an insufferable gobshite, why would anyone take his illiterate word on anything? If you can even work out what he is trying to say, I wouldn't take a recommendation off him as he would suck off a tramp for a freebie.

 

[Victoriabelle]

I lost it at "ma letterbox is still hanging awf ma door"

 

[Shivers]

Omg I’ve never witnessed such an over reaction

I mean, yes, it’s a pretty bad mistake to make. But they didn’t just do it randomly. He had asked them to call out to investigate the issue above him, they’ve done so, but messed up. He told them the neighbour wasn’t there anymore so they had to break the locks to get in. But yes stupidly they’ve broken the wrong locks. But it’s not like they just decided to go round and break locks for no reason. As long as they fix any damage what’s the issue? He’s going on like he’s ‘not going to drop it’ and ‘sorry isn’t enough’ lol what does he want them to do??

 

[Kikini Bamalam]

Will you bad fuckers pack it in? I might want to sleep at some point and I just know that some of these pictures are going to haunt my dreams
Plus I can't join in as I cleaned out my phone last weekend of all my screenshots of Melv, as it was becoming embarrassing when I was flicking through them to get to cute pictures of my dog to show people .

 

[cleaningupthecrap]

Unfortunately forced entry to the wrong property is illegal.
If it was your house I doubt you would be so matter of fact !

Well, we certainly wouldn't use it for Insta fodder for our lovelies and get a head wobble on so violent it makes us imagine a whole city of houses being built across the road from us.

There's a rave about section on the forum where you could go and sit in your safe space and lip-synch some 90's power ballads in homage to Saint Saviour of small businesses Melvin?

 

[TheNiceBeardMan]

Just been watching. Does he think he's the only person to have chrome carpet grips? He said you don't ever see that effect, just brass.

Mario, I'm 37 and I've only ever had chrome ones..... Fucking hell hahahaha

 

[Kikini Bamalam]

So, let me get this straight. Our Melv is now "listenin to hus bodeh" and sleeping when he can... Does he not realise that the more he sleeps during the evening/day, the less he will sleep at night time? It would be better for him to keep himself awake for the evening and then have an early night.
Honestly you just can't help stupid, can you Mummy2?

 

[Exhausted Pigeon]

Not gonna be on for a few days = Posts something every day.

I keep my family private = Here's several family photos plus an update on their circumstances.

 

[ayeayecaptain]

I know I can do better but I do actually want to sleep tonight without thinking 1-2 Mario’s Comin For You.....

 

[Luna~k]

That's exactly what I thought. He can hardly string a sentence together when he is vegetating in his bed talking to his lovelies so I imagine when he is irrately speaking to a council worker he will be full on double Dutch. The poor person on the other end of the phone didn't stand a chance

The council also have a duty of care and if Mario has ranted yesterday about the neighbour being gone for a year they may have been concerned that something could have happened and needed to check that he wasn’t lying dead in his flat and with all Mario’s ranting the person on the phone probably thought Mario’s address was the neighbours.

Years ago my Nan was in hospital and her community alarm went off neighbours told the response people that they hadn’t seen her for a few weeks so they broke in, realised she wasn’t there replaced the door and left a note telling us to call in to arrange collection for the keys, it wasn’t a big deal and we were happy that had something been wrong they would’ve helped her. Aren’t council workers all PVG checked anyway? The poor person that broke in probably had a feeling of dread that they were about to find a corpse and instead got a lung full of cleaning products.

 

[MrsEvil]

I’m sorry to say this but I fucking love Mario now! (For comedy purposes obviously). I would start a rave thread but I’d probably be the only one there so please don’t kick me out of this thread.

Hes somehow got 80k followers and could probably make some decent money from that account but he just doesn’t know how. Probably because he thinks being the store manager for next is going ‘all the way to the tap of the ladder’.

I’d love it if he came out as a comedian and it turns out his account was a parody all along.

 

[Divinechat]

Right you horrible lot. I've just had to watch that guff 3 times to take in what he's actually warbling on about cos I spent the first 2 views looking for screenshot gold (and failing)!

I blame all youse

 

[cleaningupthecrap]

I might read a suggestion to educate myself with a little bit more gravitas if the person who wrote it managed to type it correctly. Yourselfs? Are they related to Santa's little helpers? Who's? you need to go check your grammar as well as your spelling hun.

In fact the whole sentence makes about as much sense as one of saint saviour Melvin's incoherent twat waffles.

 

[insta(sham)]

I’m howling at these videos ‘I’m loosing loss of earnings’ by having to rush home coz me hoose is unsafe, nah mate, think it’s okay. Squatters would look through the door at your crapets and 50 shades of grey b&m interior and move on

I’m howling at these videos ‘I’m loosing loss of earnings’ by having to rush home coz me hoose is unsafe, nah mate, think it’s okay. Squatters would look through the door at your crapets and 50 shades of grey b&m interior and move on

God forbid if anything actually bad were to happen to him? Vapid Twat

 

[Lottiedooda]

Yes, Melvin queen of Scots does live in a cooncil flat, although to hear him describe it, you would think he lived in Buckingham Palace. He currently has rats in his loft and had his front door "smashed" (the lock was drilled accidentally) by the cooncil on Friday and is now launching a huge law suit against said cooncil for making him feel unsafe in his special place.
If you like laughing at complete nobends, I recommend not following but looking into Melvin daily. He is unintentionally hilarious and completely self centred and deluded.

Dont forget he could afford to buy a house tomorrow...*clicks fingers* just like that...but he chooses not to as he doesn't want anyone else to benefit from all his hard work as he built it from the ground up (his actual words)

 

[Flozora]

For the love of God - you’d think a robber had broken in while they slept (in their shit cheap bed) and bummed the wee caaaat Raaaaaayn; the way he’s mincing on.

It’s a mistake. A shit one, granted. But, nobody is dead, it’s been fixed, he’s had an apology and he’s had some airtime out of it. His Oscar winning performance was pathetic and over the top, considering.

Utter gobshite. I dislike the cock womble a little bit more each time I watch him, but I can’t stop! He’s my guilty pleasure that I just won’t give up!

 

[Nellyellie]

the chins, the nose, the hairline

 

[Mack84]

Panic over! Maria is all good! Picture of the door knocker chair this morning just to prove it. Also of course his new ring light is better than his old one - but if he hadn’t broke the old one with his temper tantrum he would never have known. Every cloud has a grey lining!
But Ayeeeeeeeeee he’s fine! Nothing much to say but for dramatic effect Derek is on PA duties to answer mails because Maria is tired.