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Heβs so bleeping pervy!! 
Me too - and I'm a Shireling
Isn't there a YouTube vid with a Scottish woman going mad at Alex bring racist cos it doesn't understand her, then she puts on a terrible cockney accent and alexa understands her.
Bet Dezza feels just great that his 300 bucks Dyson prezzie has been outdone by Soph making Melvin's year with a gift that either cost her nothing or at most a third of the cost of a Dyson.
Especially as itβs not even picking anything up off the sofa
His slow pan up on the hoover while itβs switched on and just stood there absolutely kills me
Screaming "gettaefuckyabastart" at Alexa will not get her to stop whatever she's doing - vouching for what a friend saidIsn't there a YouTube vid with a Scottish woman going mad at Alex bring racist cos it doesn't understand her, then she puts on a terrible cockney accent and alexa understands her.
Can you imagine if he was on that
Heβd get his letterbox battered in (again)Do you think heβd try and fend them off by chasing them with the handheld shark?
Or maybe heβd get Nikita to run at them and also away from them
Maybe another reason his skin is 'soooooooo sensitive' is because the boujie bedding he buys is so cheap. That kind of crap makes anyone's skin itch. Get some decent quality high thread count cotton bedding. Dezza works at M+S and they do lovely bedding and they'd get a discount.
The duck is that bedding hope he stays still when he sleeps or the friction the cheap
fabric makes will catch fire.
the pink and grey just donβt go together at all
hope he stays still when he sleeps or the friction the cheapfabric makes will catch fire.
the pink and grey just donβt go together at all
And he overpaid for it too - by Β£13The duck is that bedding
fabric makes will catch fire.
the pink and grey just donβt go together at all
Why does he insist on emptying the shite out of his hoover thing on the cooker!!!!!!! 
hes not any sort of 'cleaner'. Filthy wee shite.
hes not any sort of 'cleaner'. Filthy wee shite.
Pure gold wasnt itI've actually just watched the stories of him drying his hair
He is an utter dirt devil at all levelsWhy does he insist on emptying the shite out of his hoover thing on the cooker!!!!!!!
Heβs so in love with himself. Maybe thatβs why he dries his hair for so long... must be drying his egoβs hair too 
I went to a fancypants school in England and I struggle to get Alexa to understand StiRling.Screaming "gettaefuckyabastart" at Alexa will not get her to stop whatever she's doing - vouching for what a friend said
Dereks definitely stoned to duck 99% of the time to touch thatPure feelin' myself the day ma lovelies!
Always time for a 19 second wank whilst drying your crown
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Ask Alexa to say your name, mine says sooo san.
It looks like something your granny would have on her bedJust started to watch today's stories....
That pink bedding is actually bleeping offensive and should be burned immediately
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