Childfree by Choice #8 Parents keep scrolling, we don’t need your trolling!

[hmmm_no]

Fuming

Hmm, going strictly by the behavior I see from parents AND kids in public, I'd actually wager that you're not trying your best. In fact, a lot don't even seem to be trying at all. Largely do not blame the kids though, they're being kids and it's silly to expect them to act like anything else when someone isn't correcting it.

If I pay extra to have an adults-only space, that should be respected. Family restaurants at 5pm? Not expected to be adults only. Amusement parks, pools, parks, interactive museums? Definitely expect kids. Adults only night at the art museum? Wine tasting? Brewery tour? Doing the big grocery shop at 11pm? IDGAF how much you want to go, get a babysitter or stay home. Sorry but that's what you chose.

Edit: Read the article and a bit confused. The title says "no matter how much they pay" but in the article she writes "unless they pay for a child free experience". Which is it?

 

[Interestingbitsnbats]

I’ve just skimmed this but a couple of things: First she’s bemoaning the fact that someone said she’d need to keep her kid quiet…in a LIBRARY…ffs. Everyone has to be quiet…it’s a library!! Second, this quote: “no parent believes that children have the right to run riot…”…err really?!

When you go to a drinking pub that's not based on food but still expected to have children around wheres there's nothing to entertain them. You go to a upper class restaurant purely to avoid kids but apparently you have to expect them everywhere you turn

 

[Vroomvroom]

My plans for tonight include eating M&S Gaston pub meal deal pie and chips, drinking Prosecco and watching MotoGP. Tomorrow we are off for a day out with friends to celebrate a 40th birthday. Then Sunday we plan to pootle to the garden centre to buy some plants. All good stuff!

 

[LaBlonde]

View attachment 2056078

Just saw this on Reddit and immediately needed to share it here!

given that we’re coming to the end of this thread can i nominate this sign as our next thread title? it will make me laugh every time
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I was browsing books on Amazon and this came up

View attachment 2011551

or this one actually i love them both.

 

[whoareyouu]

not sure if this has been shared yet but this is an amazing article that’s worth a read:

Opinion: Women without children aren’t selfish – we’re self aware

For years I’ve wondered why it’s acceptable for sexuality and gender to be on a spectrum, but not the proclivity to procreate

www.independent.co.uk

Thank you for sharing that! X

 

[Saddlesoap]

given that we’re coming to the end of this thread can i nominate this sign as our next thread title? it will make me laugh every time

I second the 'no baby on board' one

 

[Tangent Tiger]

I'm so glad I didn't blunder into having children by mistake. I have done a lot of daft things over the years but I was always careful not to get pregnant and was lucky ex didn't quibble with me about my insistence on condoms. Children weren't the right thing for me but I appreciate other's life choices.

There were some running riot in a shop recently, I bought them the lollipops they wanted in the end just to get them out of the way. They were a little young actually to be out unsupervised. Seemed quite sweet but they were holding up the whole shop.

Can you imagine that constant noise all the time???

 

[pinkmug]

not sure if this has been shared yet but this is an amazing article that’s worth a read:

Opinion: Women without children aren’t selfish – we’re self aware

For years I’ve wondered why it’s acceptable for sexuality and gender to be on a spectrum, but not the proclivity to procreate

www.independent.co.uk

Good article, and this is a good reminder.

I had plans to see two friends who just got married but we had to postpone, so I am plan-free for the weekend. Just as well, I've had a hard week, I've been dealing with health anxiety and a lot of brain fog, so it feels good to know that I'll be able to chill. My flat is squeaky clean, I changed my bedding, I got a wax and a manicure so I'm all set to do as I please I'll get my hair cut today and I have an eye doctor appointment but they are all leisurely activities. In the evening I want to watch something fun (thinking of Matrix), reading something from my giant to-read pile and getting my head in order.

 

[flutternutter]

Just blown 300 on a new holiday wardrobe for hubby. Couldn't do that with a kid! Probably spend 300 on their school uniform!

Cant be bothered to car shop. I hate the way the salesmen speak to you like you're an idiot, and the saleswomen are always aggressive

 

[soph30]

I’m so glad I don’t feel like this. Must be soooo tough especially if you don’t yet have the right partner and time’s ticking https://archive.is/2023.03.19-08502...ility-ivf-miscarriage-elizabeth-day-qjh7vqdzm

 

[judgejohndeed]

When you go to a drinking pub that's not based on food but still expected to have children around wheres there's nothing to entertain them. You go to a upper class restaurant purely to avoid kids but apparently you have to expect them everywhere you turn

I really hate it when parents take their kids to these places and say things like ‘well my little Ralph can come here because he’s well behaved and grown up’ and Ralph is the one sitting in the corner shrieking, eating his own snot. Some parents seem completely oblivious to how badly behaved their kids are and that astounds me too, like when their kids scream and shriek and they don’t even flinch? If living with a kid is acclimatising to that constant racket then keep it far away from me thanks!

 

[drewydrop]

I’m so glad I don’t feel like this. Must be soooo tough especially if you don’t yet have the right partner and time’s ticking https://archive.is/2023.03.19-08502...ility-ivf-miscarriage-elizabeth-day-qjh7vqdzm

I read this article a few weeks back and it really struck a chord with me with how I felt in my early 30s when I thought I wanted children and all my friends were having them. I’ve never been in a position to even try have children (never been in the right relationship) and have no idea if I could even have a baby even if I wanted in. But the writer hits the nail on the head with how lonely it can feel and how smug parents can be and the expectation that you have to drop everything for them as though your life isn’t as important. These screen shots really summed up how I was made to feel my certain ‘friends’.

 

[Interestingbitsnbats]

I really hate it when parents take their kids to these places and say things like ‘well my little Ralph can come here because he’s well behaved and grown up’ and Ralph is the one sitting in the corner shrieking, eating his own snot. Some parents seem completely oblivious to how badly behaved their kids are and that astounds me too, like when their kids scream and shriek and they don’t even flinch? If living with a kid is acclimatising to that constant racket then keep it far away from me thanks!

Its watch your laugh there's children in here its a pub a drinking pub i.e working mens pubs not a playground for children darts and snooker tables hardly toddler based

 

[Chocolategoggler]

I really hate it when parents take their kids to these places and say things like ‘well my little Ralph can come here because he’s well behaved and grown up’ and Ralph is the one sitting in the corner shrieking, eating his own snot. Some parents seem completely oblivious to how badly behaved their kids are and that astounds me too, like when their kids scream and shriek and they don’t even flinch? If living with a kid is acclimatising to that constant racket then keep it far away from me thanks!

My friends with kids are on permanent headache tablets which actually causes headaches! So they're on a permanent short fuse with me and my helpful suggestions.

 

[boomclap]

I've wanted to join/post for ages and now this threads nearly done - typical
I nearly had a child by adoption and backed out for reasons I don't want to share specifics on here as it could be identifying. It was due to the child, things had been hidden from us by social services.
Usual story, failed to conceive naturally, failed to conceive via IVF, turned to adoption to have our "dream" family.
I've since found out that this isn't all it's cracked up to be and there's a lot of people like me.
The biggest difference, unless they are all lying to me - I'm relieved it didn't work out. Of course at the time I was devastated, but now I feel so lucky for the life I have and the freedom I've got.
It makes me feel like an awful person because if we had adopted, would I have grown to hate them, resent them for not allowing me the life I'm living now?
Also having to explain to people that all of a sudden you're happily childfree is hard. They all think I'm covering up this terrible pain. But I just don't care?

 

[Baby Giraffe]

I've wanted to join/post for ages and now this threads nearly done - typical
I nearly had a child by adoption and backed out for reasons I don't want to share specifics on here as it could be identifying. It was due to the child, things had been hidden from us by social services.
Usual story, failed to conceive naturally, failed to conceive via IVF, turned to adoption to have our "dream" family.
I've since found out that this isn't all it's cracked up to be and there's a lot of people like me.
The biggest difference, unless they are all lying to me - I'm relieved it didn't work out. Of course at the time I was devastated, but now I feel so lucky for the life I have and the freedom I've got.
It makes me feel like an awful person because if we had adopted, would I have grown to hate them, resent them for not allowing me the life I'm living now?
Also having to explain to people that all of a sudden you're happily childfree is hard. They all think I'm covering up this terrible pain. But I just don't care?

From my perspective I never had even a teeny urge to have a kid, it just didn’t look remotely appealing and I don’t have whatever gene it is that makes you want to hold babies etc. However, if I’d had an accident while in a committed relationship I’d have found it hard to have an abortion so would have got on with it. My life would have been very different but I’ve never been one for dwelling on what might have been.

 

[emm]

From my perspective I never had even a teeny urge to have a kid, it just didn’t look remotely appealing and I don’t have whatever gene it is that makes you want to hold babies etc. However, if I’d had an accident while in a committed relationship I’d have found it hard to have an abortion so would have got on with it. My life would have been very different but I’ve never been one for dwelling on what might have been.

I'm glad worked out for the best adoption is such a difficult thing, i think it should be made easier within the UK as there are so many children in care, which is no way to grow up, but from a friend I had whomworked in social services, obviously lots.of people want to adopt babies, some of whom have inevitably been born from mothers who have substance abuse issues during pregnancy which often is not apparent initially so people can end up adopting babies with severe developmental issues that they are not able to cope with because social workers haven't always disclosed everything properly

 

[boomclap]

I'm glad worked out for the best adoption is such a difficult thing, i think it should be made easier within the UK as there are so many children in care, which is no way to grow up, but from a friend I had whomworked in social services, obviously lots.of people want to adopt babies, some of whom have inevitably been born from mothers who have substance abuse issues during pregnancy which often is not apparent initially so people can end up adopting babies with severe developmental issues that they are not able to cope with because social workers haven't always disclosed everything properly

I do agree a lot of people want to adopt babies, but there's also a lot of dishonesty about older children due to this. They are harder to place so social workers hide information in the hope you don't ask questions. It's a horrible set up. They prey on people like me, like I was.

 

[Saddlesoap]

I know two people who have adopted children. I'm sure they love them, but from an outsider perspective it seems like they've made life very difficult.

 

[Baby Giraffe]

I know two people who have adopted children. I'm sure they love them, but from an outsider perspective it seems like they've made life very difficult.

I understand why somebody would adopt as the child is in need of care and already exists. I'm sure it's incredibly hard but there is a purpose to it. The decision to have one yourself is purely selfish though based around an urge to create something new.