Chelsea Ferguson #12 Misses her best friend getting wed but can go to Ibiza and get off her head

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CocoVenus

CocoVenus

Ok giving it a go to make my first ever fred, thanks @Flip&Flop for the thread title.

Recap:

Where to start!

  • Tried to flog the manshun, and even gave it a (much needed) clean, but it got about as much attention as her fanny on a fiver sale so she's staying put in the two room bedsit she's made for herself in there.
  • Helped not sell the manshun by getting ragged all over her garden whilst her dogs looked on in terror. I guess every garden needs a good hoe...
  • Drank WKD for breakfast lunch and dinner then whipped sobriety white board of shame out at least 50 times
  • Reckons she has ADHD when she's actually clearly suffering from ADCB (A Daily Coke Bag)
  • Continues to squat and lunge badly in a yeast infected thong with her tits out in front of her pervy PT
  • Swapped the lambo for a qashqai... qash flow issues?!
  • So desperate for cash she's now resorting to selling her sweaty socks.
  • Gone from ongoing neglect of 'endrix to full on shaming him on Facebook for likes. Still sees less of him than her fanny sees a flannel and soap
  • Made a new 'friend' who looks like the poster girl for 'faces of meth'
  • Went to 'beefa, stayed in a shite hotel, took pervy PT and meth woman and was an utter disgrace.
  • Came back and pretended to be mum of the year by videoing herself opening one page of 'the wonky donkey' which is either a kids book she has no intention of actually reading to 'endrix or the start of her autobiography
  • Still has square tits, three house bricks masquerading as abs and a chin Dick Dastardly would be proud of
  • Had more half price fanny sales than DFS has half price sofa sales.
Anything else?
 
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CocoVenus

CocoVenus

@Rabbit!69 and @AM87 and @SoVeryKindlyGifted

Thank you ☺ *Takes a bow and gets wonky square tits out..

"I'd like to thank WKD and cocaine for being there for me every day, my pelaton and pervy PT for being a constant source of support and shite content, meth woman as my supporting actress who makes even me look half way socially acceptable, my fat tongue for highlighting the tragic plight of other fat tongue sufferers like Jamie Oliver and of course the wonderful, beautiful love of my life, my reason for getting up every morning, the one who I put above everyone else and I'm so blessed to have... MYSELF 🥰"
 

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kelly123

kelly123

CocoVenus said:
Ok giving it a go to make my first ever fred, thanks @Flip&Flop for the thread title.

Recap:

Where to start!

  • Tried to flog the manshun, and even gave it a (much needed) clean, but it got about as much attention as her fanny on a fiver sale so she's staying put in the two room bedsit she's made for herself in there.
  • Helped not sell the manshun by getting ragged all over her garden whilst her dogs looked on in terror. I guess every garden needs a good hoe...
  • Drank WKD for breakfast lunch and dinner then whipped sobriety white board of shame out at least 50 times
  • Reckons she has ADHD when she's actually clearly suffering from ADCB (A Daily Coke Bag)
  • Continues to squat and lunge badly in a yeast infected thong with her tits out in front of her pervy PT
  • Swapped the lambo for a qashqai... qash flow issues?!
  • So desperate for cash she's now resorting to selling her sweaty socks.
  • Gone from ongoing neglect of 'endrix to full on shaming him on Facebook for likes. Still sees less of him than her fanny sees a flannel and soap
  • Made a new 'friend' who looks like the poster girl for 'faces of meth'
  • Went to 'beefa, stayed in a shite hotel, took pervy PT and meth woman and was an utter disgrace.
  • Came back and pretended to be mum of the year by videoing herself opening one page of 'the wonky donkey' which is either a kids book she has no intention of actually reading to 'endrix or the start of her autobiography
  • Still has square tits, three house bricks masquerading as abs and a chin Dick Dastardly would be proud of
  • Had more half price fanny sales than DFS has half price sofa sales.
Anything else?
Click to expand...
Absolutely brilliant 🫡
 
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silent watcher/reader

silent watcher/reader

It’s all the organic stuff for me 😭🥴🤣
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She’ll be back to the wkd and jägers and a random dick and god knows what else next week
 
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JoeExotic

JoeExotic

Sorry if it’s been mentioned, but that hotel she stayed in is the S’anfora in San Antonio Bay. 2 star tit hole. Recognised the balcony straight away. Me and my pals stayed there twice when we were early 20s and always joke about how we could never stay in a dive like that now. Not the sort of place a millionaire would go 🤣
 
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Aha

Aha

Realised today who Endrix looks like - anyone see Thomas Turgoose in This Is England?!
B04E116A-1C19-4AF7-A895-6F776CECE3F0.jpeg
 
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T

Tiny-T

I don’t understand what she means when she bangs on about working hard, blood, sweat and tears, blah blah blah. You worked a job that involves working in the early hours of the morning. So what? So do bartenders, emergency services, wagon drivers, supermarket staff, Royal Mail, airlines, the list goes on and on. She bangs on like taking her clothes off is hard, even then she’s lazy with the content. Going to the gym and flashing her tits in the grubby toilet or pulling her pants down for a quick pic. Yes she started her own company and put her own money, she didn’t do it on her own. “Nobody helped me.” The cousin runs the business, she would have hired web developers etc. The woman talks out her arse.
 
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livelaughbarf

livelaughbarf

Tiny-T said:
I don’t understand what she means when she bangs on about working hard, blood, sweat and tears, blah blah blah. You worked a job that involves working in the early hours of the morning. So what? So do bartenders, emergency services, wagon drivers, supermarket staff, Royal Mail, airlines, the list goes on and on. She bangs on like taking her clothes off is hard, even then she’s lazy with the content. Going to the gym and flashing her tits in the grubby toilet or pulling her pants down for a quick pic. Yes she started her own company and put her own money, she didn’t do it on her own. “Nobody helped me.” The cousin runs the business, she would have hired web developers etc. The woman talks out her arse.
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I agree, the only reason she made so much in the first place was because she got lucky. Not because of hard work. She worked as a stripper and got pissed on wkd 3 days a week, she wasn’t down the mines 12 hours at a time risking her life. If she had actually worked hard and made decent business decisions she wouldn’t be trying to flog her fanny for less than the price of a pack of chicken breasts, driving a Nissan, and staying in 2star hotels. If it wasn’t for luck and her footballer mate promoting her on twitter she would still be washing up at Maccies. Also, everything organic from Tesco for her monthly shop, wonder if the Coke she shoves up her nose every week is organic too 😂
 
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T

thatpinkone

Tiny-T said:
I don’t understand what she means when she bangs on about working hard, blood, sweat and tears, blah blah blah. You worked a job that involves working in the early hours of the morning. So what? So do bartenders, emergency services, wagon drivers, supermarket staff, Royal Mail, airlines, the list goes on and on. She bangs on like taking her clothes off is hard, even then she’s lazy with the content. Going to the gym and flashing her tits in the grubby toilet or pulling her pants down for a quick pic. Yes she started her own company and put her own money, she didn’t do it on her own. “Nobody helped me.” The cousin runs the business, she would have hired web developers etc. The woman talks out her arse.
Click to expand...
Exactly. This is why I respect someone like Rebecca Goodwin - she comes up with the concepts for her own films, helps produce them etc. It's a proper production with a proper cameraman, director, editor etc.

Now don't get me wrong, I'm NOT shitting on sex workers who set up their iphone to film themselves masturbating and just upload it as is (I used to do that), but I never made out like it was hard work.

She's beginning to sound like Mikayla "try being an influencer for a day and working past 5:19" Nogueira.
 
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Rxt156

Rxt156

OMG I missed the new thread. Wondered why it has gone quiet. Going to catch up brbbbb
 
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T

Tiny-T

livelaughbarf said:
I agree, the only reason she made so much in the first place was because she got lucky. Not because of hard work. She worked as a stripper and got pissed on wkd 3 days a week, she wasn’t down the mines 12 hours at a time risking her life. If she had actually worked hard and made decent business decisions she wouldn’t be trying to flog her fanny for less than the price of a pack of chicken breasts, driving a Nissan, and staying in 2star hotels. If it wasn’t for luck and her footballer mate promoting her on twitter she would still be washing up at Maccies. Also, everything organic from Tesco for her monthly shop, wonder if the Coke she shoves up her nose every week is organic too 😂
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Totally agree. She got lucky in the sense she was around when lads mags were taking off. As times changed she moved online. She has nothing to do with the day to day business, that company is what it is because of the cousin not because square tits decides to flash her chebs in a restaurant. If it’s such hard work how come 95% of her time is free to do as she pleases.
 
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