Caroline Flack

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Caroline's death is such a trigger for me as I'm sure it is with many people

Whether she flicked him, hit him with a phone/lamp/fan.. whatever it was, the woman did not deserve to die

I totally believe her suicide was avoidable, and I'm annoyed her friends didn't stay with her on the day she died, fully knowing her mental state and that she'd attempted suicide more than once

The fact she had text her friend the night before saying she wanted to kill herself? I'm sorry I wouldn't move from my friends side if I was in that situation, and I would've done all I could to get her help

I'm not blaming her friends but I just believe there was a lot more that could have been done to help her

I'm not condoning what she done to Lewis, no one will ever know for certain what happened that night apart from the two of them and it's no wonder her mental health was fucked with all the lies/rumours/speculation that followed
“I’m not blaming her friends but...” @Sarahjay01 put it better than I probably can but I can only imagine how difficult it must have been for them. I wouldn’t know how to handle that situation so I would phone everyone I knew to help in whatever way. Maybe they did that? Someone posted earlier that Caroline’s mum and sister were going to see her that afternoon. Did they know how serious the situation was? Maybe not and even if they did I wouldn’t feel comfortable blaming them for not dropping everything and running to her at whatever time of day. Maybe the friend or friends needed to get away for their own mental health and Caroline persuaded them she’d be okay (as I think had happened multiple times before).

There was so much reported/commented on at the time that didn’t come out at the inquest, which confirms the theory that what was published in the media impacted on Caroline’s mental health. I remember reading stuff at the time that said the Police had leaked the bloody photo. I’m not sure about English law but in Scotland, if the Police are called to a domestic incident, the perpetrator is arrested and kept in custody to appear at the next Court day. I don’t think a caution is ever an option.

I think it’s all really really sad. I loved her on Strictly (her Charleston is my favourite Strictly dance of all time). The people left behind by suicide are always left with what ifs and questions but I don’t think any person or persons being blamed without just cause is good for anyone. Her mum will probably never get over this but pinning Caroline’s death on one Police Officer is toxic. And even in a haze of insta posing and make-up, I doubt there’s a day goes by where her friends don’t wish they could change what happened.
 
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Caroline’s mums statement is interesting. I wonder which friends she is referring to. And it makes me think that Lewis wouldn’t have been welcome at the funeral.

Is it possible that the the people in the photos at the wake were Not invited to the funeral and had drinks amongst themselves.

I can’t get my head around the Lewis and Lottie publicity and the timing of it. I’m sure they could have been more careful to not be spotted together around the time of the inquest.

She’s only young and has experienced a lot of loss herself, but it doesn’t sit right with me that she is Lou’s friend and considering how close Caroline was to Lou that it would be acceptable to start a relationship with him.
 
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Ohhhh, so he is supposed to have told her "You're fucked" as in you're fucked up in the head. I misunderstood this and thought it was being suggested that he said you're fucked now, I'm going to report you for this.

Either way would be unpleasant to hear, let's be honest but the architect of these events was always Caroline. However embarrassing the fallout was, she set this in motion and looking for blame (although understandable) will bring no peace to her loved ones.
 
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Ohhhh, so he is supposed to have told her "You're fucked" as in you're fucked up in the head. I misunderstood this and thought it was being suggested that he said you're fucked now, I'm going to report you for this.

Either way would be unpleasant to hear, let's be honest but the architect of these events was always Caroline. However embarrassing the fallout was, she set this in motion and looking for blame (although understandable) will bring no peace to her loved ones.
I read it as “you’re fucked”as I’m calling the police
 
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I read it as “you’re fucked”as I’m calling the police
Same.


Caroline’s mums statement is interesting. I wonder which friends she is referring to. And it makes me think that Lewis wouldn’t have been welcome at the funeral.

Is it possible that the the people in the photos at the wake were Not invited to the funeral and had drinks amongst themselves.

I can’t get my head around the Lewis and Lottie publicity and the timing of it. I’m sure they could have been more careful to not be spotted together around the time of the inquest.

She’s only young and has experienced a lot of loss herself, but it doesn’t sit right with me that she is Lou’s friend and considering how close Caroline was to Lou that it would be acceptable to start a relationship with him.
I said this yesterday (BIB) and I think we're both right.

I get the feeling her mother is quite venomous in her grief and blaming everyone around Caroline - Lewis, Lou and Molly would definitely not have been welcomed by her to the funeral in my opinion.
 
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I read it as you're fucked in the head for misreading those texts or drunk fucked
Read the context of the quote:

"According to a police report Lewis – who knew her fear of bad publicity – told her she was "f***ed" then called officers"
 
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I read it as “you’re fucked”as I’m calling the police
And ending your career.

Same.



I said this yesterday (BIB) and I think we're both right.

I get the feeling her mother is quite venomous in her grief and blaming everyone around Caroline - Lewis, Lou and Molly would definitely not have been welcomed by her to the funeral in my opinion.
Her mum probably feels so much guilt about not realising her daughter was in such a dark place.

I find the way Caroline is referred to as a young girl quite disconcerting.
 
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She behaved like an eternal teenager - hadn't settled down, drifting from one toxic relationship to another.

Her Mother probably didn't see or treat her as an adult - that's why she called her a girl.
 
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So
I totally get why Caroline’s mum would be looking for someone to blame. On the surface, Caroline had everything to live for - and to hear that cps initially only wanted to caution her, to then find out that they were going ahead with a trial, I would imagine its natural to look for someone to blame, and to pinpoint that as being the cause - if they hadn’t gone ahead and wanted to take it to trial, then Caroline may not have died. My daughter died - she was very premature and had everything stacked against her but still, I blamed the consultant, the midwife, the hospital - if only they had got her out earlier, if only they had tried to keep her in, all the if onlys - maybe a form of denial, a part of grief. I imagine if I was Caroline’s mum, I would feel exactly the same. When really, we will never know. No one will know how bad she must have been feeling, what else may have pushed her to end everything, it’s so desperately sad.
So sorry for your loss. But did u publicly accuse anyone? Like Caroline’s mother has? There is blame which is a human response to grief etc, and then there’s what she did which is unfair spiteful and unacceptable. She has had a long time to reflect and consider what to say if anything. And she chose to hurt unnecessarily and for no just reason’ imo should not have been allowed to happen at all!
She behaved like an eternal teenager - hadn't settled down, drifting from one toxic relationship to another.

Her Mother probably didn't see or treat her as an adult - that's why she called her a girl.
Maybe if she had of been treated as and expected to behave like the Middle Aged woman she actually was. she could of grown up and faced up to her demons. She had the means to any/every relevant source of help.She chose denial, and her mother seems exactly the same! If the fame was too much for her she could of easily walked away, but As it seems with so many of these bleeding heart celebs they are unable to survive without total adoration. Any thing they don’t want to hear however minor is now a trolling incident😡.
 
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I’m in two minds about whether to post this because it is an insensitive and unkind thing to say about a grieving woman but...this is a place for honesty.

It’s crossed my mind that Caroline’s mum’s behaviour during the inquest, including the type of statements she has made, her disinclination to recognise accountability (on behalf of Caroline) for the crime and her infantilising of Caroline, may somewhat explain some of the mental health struggles Caroline experienced. That’s absolutely not to say she is to blame for what happened or is a terrible mother or anything of the sort. But both mother and daughter appear to have some histrionic traits. Having said that, I understand grief and the stress of the circumstances could easily make anyone behave out of character.

It may be because of a difference in the level of media coverage but I think usually the families of murder victims, for example, are reported to behave appropriately in court or during an inquest. If Caroline’s mum wanted answers from those she felt were to blame (and I totally understand seeking to place blame when you’re grieving) there are many formal and appropriate processes to allow her to seek those answers that don’t include berating a policewoman during her daughter’s inquest.
 
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I've been in an abusive relationship, my abuser often threatened suicide to me & his friends, and attempted it on more than one occasion, this was always when he didnt get his own way, or when he had done something wrong and needed to shift the blame. If our relationship had of been played out to the press like this has, id of looked like heartless and people would have said "he never should have been left alone in that state of vulnerability" but the fact is this probably happened on several occasions and being involved with someone threatening suicide in a pattern is emotionally draining for the people involved who also have families and lives to live, I'm sure they will be filled with regret and what ifs but really they probably exhausted all options. Sad for everyone involved.
I was going to say, if she frequently suggested suicide, her friends and family wouldn’t have seen her behaviour as out of the ordinary.

It’s not their fault regardless; Caroline and Caroline alone was responsible for killing herself.
 
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Losing a child is THE worst thing that can happen to anyone. Yes, her Mother's behaviour has been unpalatable, but I suspect she is not being in any way rational at the moment and will need a lot of counselling as a minimum.
 
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Losing a child is THE worst thing that can happen to anyone. Yes, her Mother's behaviour has been unpalatable, but I suspect she is not being in any way rational at the moment and will need a lot of counselling as a minimum.
Yeah I suspect she actually blames herself a lot too, there will be a lot of ‘I should have done...’ and ‘what if...’ since her death
 
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Losing a child is THE worst thing that can happen to anyone. Yes, her Mother's behaviour has been unpalatable, but I suspect she is not being in any way rational at the moment and will need a lot of counselling as a minimum.
Absolutely agree, that’s why I was hesitant about posting my judgemental comment. I have a child and I can only imagine...

I was recalling the recent media coverage of the PC who tragically died while being towed behind a speeding car for a few miles, after having got his feet caught in straps at the back of the vehicle during a police stop. The men driving the car have been found guilty of manslaughter and his wife and family are very angry and upset about the outcome. The PC’s wife made a strong statement after the hearing, his mother has tweeted about the injustice but none of them ranted and raved in a formal, public setting or singled out their blame for the judge, for example. They’re very different circumstances but I couldn’t help but note the difference in the decorum. It’s understandable but I’d guess quite uncommon behaviour during an inquest.
 
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Absolutely agree, that’s why I was hesitant about posting my judgemental comment. I have a child and I can only imagine...

I was recalling the recent media coverage of the PC who tragically died while being towed behind a speeding car for a few miles, after having got his feet caught in straps at the back of the vehicle during a police stop. The men driving the car have been found guilty of manslaughter and his wife and family are very angry and upset about the outcome. The PC’s wife made a strong statement after the hearing, his mother has tweeted about the injustice but none of them ranted and raved in a formal, public setting or singled out their blame for the judge, for example. They’re very different circumstances but I couldn’t help but note the difference in the decorum. It’s understandable but I’d guess quite uncommon behaviour during an inquest.

There but for the grace of God go I.

Not trying to be sanctimonious, but I strongly suspect this type of outburst is very common during/after inquests. By their nature, inquests are about unexpected/unexplained deaths, so usually concerning suicide or similar. The families will be going through heightened emotions and anger/bitterness will almost certainly be at the forefront of their thoughts or motivations.

PC Harper's wife and family have indeed been very dignified. But I don't think it's very helpful or compassionate to make that as a 'like for like' comparison. The woman is going through a hell that none of us can (and hopefully ever will) contemplate. I agree with a lot of the observations you made about her and no parent is perfect. But a parent that has lost their child is a shell of a person.
 
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Absolutely agree, that’s why I was hesitant about posting my judgemental comment. I have a child and I can only imagine...

I was recalling the recent media coverage of the PC who tragically died while being towed behind a speeding car for a few miles, after having got his feet caught in straps at the back of the vehicle during a police stop. The men driving the car have been found guilty of manslaughter and his wife and family are very angry and upset about the outcome. The PC’s wife made a strong statement after the hearing, his mother has tweeted about the injustice but none of them ranted and raved in a formal, public setting or singled out their blame for the judge, for example. They’re very different circumstances but I couldn’t help but note the difference in the decorum. It’s understandable but I’d guess quite uncommon behaviour during an inquest.
Her Mum wont even be able to think straight, its a miracle she even attended the hearing.It really screws your head up your child dying let alone in these circumstances.It will have been really distressing and hard to sit though all that. At the end of the day people behave differently and everyone has different limits before they snap, start ranting and raving etc. The fact that the other lady was more dignified is neither here not there.
 
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