Val wants to give Jessica choices as she is an adult, but Jessica acts like a 3 year old brat. As for not wanting Jessica to feel less than others, Val isn’t helping her grow. If someone acts like a child you need to treat them as a child. Jessica is allowed to make or they let her feel like she makes all the decisions. Why would you let a child make decisions when you know they don’t comprehend any of the information pertinent to the item they are choosing. That would be like letting her walk through a fire because she wanted chocolate cake, right now! That is so wrong, in every household, decisions are made together. She needs to learn to take a vote on what to do, and actually go by the result. It would teach her to consider others and what the majority want rules the day.
Val is clueless.
As parents we do give our children choices.small ones that grow as they grow... For example my daughter when younger wanted to wear dresses 24/7 ... Not always appropriate in -25 temps in winter... So.. I would take out 3 outfits I picked and let her CHOOSE which one she wanted ..parenting 101... It's not rocket science.
Along with choices comes Responsibility...and this is where Val puts in zero effort...and is why Jessica is feral, unkept, hair unbrushed, bloody scabs all over....she has no concept of NO, of consequences, of being taught how to cope, manage her anxiety ....she has been given no rules, no boundaries no consistency.... So how exactly can you give her freedom of choice when she has no understanding of consequences?
Jessica would eat chicken nuggets every meal every day..she eats that trash constantly ...and the saddest part of that is Val COULD prepare REAL chicken fingers, strips from fresh chicken breasts and cut out all that processed crap...but no...she's lazy.
Make Jessica eat healthier ....do the work Val! Instead of boxed desserts make fresh! Nothing processed.... This " mother" is home 24/7 unemployed, with 3 other adults helping care for jessica!! But there's no time to cook or bake healthy foods ?
Make healthy nutritious foods THEN give Jessica choices from them... And smaller desserts! Healthier options... Only after she's eaten her vegetables , fruits etc...
Val wants to act like Jessica is an adult ...but then tucks her into beddieby for nappies every afternoon???? Ridiculous. Or spoon feed her desserts in public??
Jessica is untamed, rude, selfish and simply nasty....her anger and treatment of those dogs is heinous she has zero self control which is why you over medicate her...otherwise you can't control her.
Her behaviour is not autism ... I live with autism , participate in the autism community and hearing you blame autism for Jessica's severe behaviours , rudeness, anger, inappropriate slapping, kissing, rubbing, picking, violence etc... That's simply POOR PARENTING on your part Val! 1000000%.
You should absolutely be ashamed of yourself and your ADULT poorly behaved children.