Ashley James #31 family of four; me, ADaline and my boobs

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Thread title credit to @LoTiLu “Ashley James - family of four; me, ADaline and my tits.”

changed slightly as I wasn’t sure if tits would be allowed.

Brief recap: relatable as always, Ashley has spent TNB’s belated paternity leave on a gifted tour of the UK. Complete with ofsted registered childcare and the in laws in tow.

Feel free to AD more (see what I did there 😉)

Now…. Onwards….
 
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My arse did she give Alf her milk…she would have obviously filmed it if she had…
 
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Why oh why does the whole boob need to be out? When she bought specific breast feeding clothes in France. She is one big contradiction.
 
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‘Fighting the antibodies’

God help her she’s so bleeping thick
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Why oh why does the whole boob need to be out? When she bought specific breast feeding clothes in France. She is one big contradiction.
Today on Loose Women Steph Miller breastfed her newborn live on the show. It was such a ‘fist pump’ moment.. there was no song and dance about it, no full boob out, just a subtle latch AND she was wearing a bfing zip tee so you wouldnt have noticed. Steph’s a midwife too - if there was a person to shout about boobing, it’s them.

Just made me realise how attention seeking Ash is 🤮
 
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I've never seen women lob their WHOLE tit out to feed their baby. She is bleeping obsessed with all things boob related. She must be diagnosed with something? Cos she's not wired right. She's a nasty mother. Proper shoves Alf out. Openly idolises Ada. The 2 kids are not gonna have a brother sister bond. They're always separated. One in creche, one at home. One in bed, one in a lobby. Wtf. Also I hate the way she makes Alf kiss Ada all the time. And the tickles to make him laugh. It's weird as duck.
 
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‘Highlights’ of the trip included-

- Alf apparently waking up at 2am and bring ‘up for the day’- Tommy noballs had to do laps of the hotel grounds with him while Queen Tit and Princess Ad got their beauty sleep. Tommy then went off for a run and Ash dumped an exhausted Alf in the crèche. Unsurprisingly, he had a meltdown, but Ash heroically battled the fifty yards from her room carrying Ada to pick him up SOLO. Was probably alone with him for 8 minutes until Tommy got back. Then called herself supermama. Without irony.

- ‘precious moments’ at breakfast in a hotel, with both kiddies staring zombiefied at a screen hidden by some table flowers.

- Alf watching Miss Rachel in the car at a safari park after he’d seen an initial monkey. Apparently not interested in anything else so was given iPad.

- a bedtime ‘game’ of pretending to be dead and needing to be kissed awake again, or something. Alf apparently very charmingly doing that at 3am. Alf continues to be allowed to snog Ada’s face.

- Poor Alf’s mobility still quite concerning, he can’t walk down stairs unaided. All videos of him ‘running’ are just him lumbering along but sped up.

-Ash needing to state Ad is still her ‘best girl’ despite being poorly and not sleeping well as a result.
 
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“Can’t wait to give it to Ada”.

FFS I couldn’t imagine anything worse than my mum giving me a statue of her stark bollock naked.
 
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Thread title credit to @LoTiLu “Ashley James - family of four; me, ADaline and my tits.”

changed slightly as I wasn’t sure if tits would be allowed.

Brief recap: relatable as always, Ashley has spent TNB’s belated paternity leave on a gifted tour of the UK. Complete with ofsted registered childcare and the in laws in tow.

Feel free to AD more (see what I did there 😉)

Now…. Onwards….
full credit to @MidnightRambler’s EPIC poem!
 
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I bet Tommy is gutted he has been able to take this paternity leave. Basically more time to wait on mummy hand and foot.
 
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It’s a shame they don’t do chocolate statues so she could ACTUALLY EAT HERSELF 🤮
 
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Why does her milk look like dirty dish water 🤢
All her inner poison is seeping out.
You know, I used to pity her for her vacuousness, undeserved smugness and hubris - not to mention her catastrophic lack of self-awareness.
Now, I actively despise her. I loathe her with a deep, visceral sense of dislike/disgust.
Seriously, what would happen if TNB had a fatal or life-limiting accident? I’m obviously not wishing that upon him (or anyone except Trump/Putain), but such things can happen when one least expects it. If she can’t be left alone with the the two children for eight minutes that she make the choice to bring into the world, what would she do if she were widowed? Would she give Alf up for adoption to Nana? Foster them out? Leave him in France? Abandon him at Paddington Station with a suitcase and a marmalade sandwich while legging it with Purrfect Baybee Gurll?
That poor child isn’t wanted. He gives off an aura of serious neglect. I don’t know if he has SEN issues or whether, like me, he’s autistic (as many of us in the community say, ‘if you’ve met one autistic person, you’ve met one autistic person’) but the fact that it is impossible to tell whether there is neurodivergence or that he is just so constrained, uncared for, understimulated, ignored, constricted, off-balanced and barely tolerated by this ludicrous twerp and her sycophant is just horrendous.
I honestly think it would be better were Alf to be with Nana fulltime. At least he’d have his hips checked out, ditto whether he’d met his milestones, receive intellectual stimulation and support, have conversations at mealtimes and wouldn’t be shoved in front of his technological babysitter every five seconds.
I hope for Alf’s sake that he is not on the ASD ‘spectrum’ - we all know what the nitwit thinks of autism. Do you remember when she came on here and claimed that I, as an autistic person, wouldn’t be able to understand nuance…? 🤦‍♀️
 
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I don’t know why people think Nana is a hero. Some nurses are rubbish and have outdated ideas / lack of good knowledge. She probably retired a while ago. And we don’t know how long she nursed for or where. Could have been before she had children, and not since!

ultimately she is clearly an enabler. And she’s don’t nothing to help alf with his delays or to stop him being so neglected…
 
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For the price she’s paying for these tit statues I’d want my head on it too. It could be anyone otherwise 😂🤣🤣
 
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For the price she’s paying for these tit statues I’d want my head on it too. It could be anyone otherwise 😂🤣🤣
I honestly can’t think of anything worse than having one of these statues-I looked like a whale with all of mine.
 
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Same. Just have me head and no body then 🤣🤣🤣
Whales make really good mums though. For years, they’d do anything for their calves! Trash is more like a harp seal (they bugger off as soon as they’re done providing milk and hope for the best)

‘I’m not like a regular Mom, I’m a harp seal mom’

Sorry. I’ve had a few wines and I always know it’s gone to my head when I start thinking what animals people would be like 🫠😂
 
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