10 Flat Shoes Eleghunt Ladies NEVER Wear!
Are you a masochist? Or do you just need something to send you to sleep? Then you've clicked on the right video! If you just can't find that perfect eleghunt shoe that doesn't have a 10-inch heel, Anna's got some tips for you! Remember, recycling is good for the environment.
1. "Dad sandals" - she admits they're comfortable, but who cares? What's far more important is that men don't like them! Totes not staged appearance from Teddy to bring in views; he just happened to wander into the shot, honest! Anna suggests you instead wear a block-heel slingback. She shows off an example from Zara, but she's cut off the ankle strap to "open up the foot." Why not just buy a shoe without it?
2. "Chain detailing" - Anna thinks it looks cheap, and demonstrates by cutting the chain off the shoe. She suggests ballet flats with bow decoration instead. Again, why not buy a shoe you actually like, rather than just chopping bits off?
3. "Chunky slides" - Anna's least favourite examples are those that come with huge plastic chains; or chunky plastic flipflops. She says the latter should be worn only for cleaning, and shows a horribly done edit of her head superimposed on a woman mopping the floor. So what should you wear instead? Buy these $725 Aquazzura sparkly flats!
4. "Gladiator sandals" - She says "is this a shoe for bondage or something else?" complete with spanking sound effects. What's wrong with them? You guessed it? CUT OFF THE LEG and cause PANCAKE FOOT. Projecting like an IMAX as always, she assumes everyone's feet are just as flat and wide as hers. Instead, wear Hermes Oran sandals or a Zara knock-off, Zara is back in favour this week
Plug for The Eleghunt Stylist. Quote: "I really wanna learn you the tools and the mindset"
5. "Bad animal print" - she can't quite articulate why she doesn't like this, but settles for saying it looks "too artificial." Well quite, Anna. Even in Russia where animal pelts are de rigueur, you usually see ladies in a mink coat, not real leopardskin sandals. She advises plain loafers instead. OK, but that achieves the complete opposite of the look you're going for
6. "Fisherman sandals" or as she calls them "man-repeller shoes." She admits that attracting men is not the be-all and end-all of life; but basically says that if you're a woman, it is your duty to make sure men find your shoes pleasing. Instead of these MAN-REPELLERS, wear sandals with simple ankle straps. Anna still hates ankle straps but admits they are useful for actually keeping the shoe on your foot.
7. "Running shoes", which should be worn for the gym or sports. They are TOTALLY DIFFERENT from sneakers, which are for looking classy. She recommends you buy her favourite Gucci sneakers. Or if you're a Poor, try a plain white, very boring, Superga platform sneaker. You'll be relieved to know Anna says it is OK to wear sneakers with a dress or skirt.
8. "'Yeezy'-style sliders" - she fails to pronounce Yeezy about six times and then cuts herself off for swearing. LOL! She thinks these shoes are what an alien would wear, again illustrated with a very childish photo edit. Anna suggests you wear a perforated woven leather ballet flat, which even she admits can make you look "a little bit like a grandma." My grandmother is 84 years of age and a loyal Daily Express reader. Even she would throw these in the bin!
9. "Closed toe clogs" - the "sister" of the dread Birkenstock. Instead, wear these $850 Gucci mules. Anna has so kindly put these undisclosed affiliate links in the description so you, too, can buy them!
10. "Retro flat shoes" - A pair of rather tacky loafers that Anna thinks Michael Jackson would have worn. Instead, go for ballet flats. Again!
She says her next video will also be about shoes. Which means it won't, and we can finally have a break.
What have we learned from this video? Nothing that wasn't in the many many different versions of it she's released before. Although maybe she could make a little extra cash as a domme, and whip people whilst yelling "HOW MANY TIMES MUST I TELL YOU NOT TO WEAR GLADIATOR SANDALS? PANCAKE FOOT! PANCAKE FOOT! CUT OFF THE LEG!"