Adam The Woo #18 Paunchy, Pasty, Petulant Peter Pan!

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Case in point:
 
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David. Shocking statement I know. But David, if no one watches = no $$ or I should say it could be a difference between getting $300 a vlog vs. $50.
I like my job (like is subjective. But I don't hate it, but I don't love it. But, like alot of people I've worked (or people still do) work jobs they HATE to support themselves and if married or have kids, their families).

You're lucky David that you do a "job" that has its own hours. If you want to take a week off, you don't have to schedule it with "the man." You basically can make a vlog doing anything you want and the woovians will watch it. But think about it David. Your woovians are maybe 10% of your viewers. It is the other 90% and the rando viewers are the ones you need to worry about. If they are not watching, as mentioned, no $$ for you. If you were a TV show, you would have been canceled for low views. Just think about that David.
 
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I assume it will be 3 days in a row of WDW and that he's at MK today for the general opening of Tiana's, along with every vlogger/streamer in the universe? As I predicted some time ago, even if he says he likes it (and he may not), his contempt for the new ride will come shining through. I bet he wears a Splash t-shirt. Talks a lot about Splash. It's going to be just like MGM Studios becomes Hollywood Studios all over again.
 
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His visits to the parks seem like a pleasant enough way to spend the day for a local with an annual pass who gets to go all the time -- leisurely walk around the nicely themed place and maybe ride a ride, but don't stress over making the most of the day because you can go back any time you want. But it does NOT make for compelling viewing. People want to actually experience something -- not just watch some dude with too much time on his hands stumble through another Groundhog Day.

He's such an arrogant prick, but I think I'm more irritated by "MichaelRei99". Who the fuck are you, Michael, Adam's publicist??? He doesn't need you to fight his battles for him.

He does NOT look healthy. I think he equates skinny with optimal health, and that's absolutely not true across the board.
His obsession with movies and Disney parks is fitting because he is the human equivalent to a backlot -- all about appearances and nothing deeper than the surface level.
 
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"I'll do what I want," my, how sassy and self-assured Adam is in the comments these days. He's the embodiment of Eric Cartman, except Adam at least has his stans to rush to his defense. My conjecture is that his conservative fan-base demographic will have generally negative comments about Tiana's ride. They already have in his comments section, comparing it to a "toilet bowl." It's that implied classical racism emanating from him and his stupid audience that is abhorrent in the Adam-verse.
Never did confirm his former drinking status, but I think he's so doctrinaire in his beliefs that he also feels he is forbidden to dance. Never saw him dance a step, or have a normal relationship with a female either for that matter. What a queer duck he is.
 
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I'll also point out that perhaps yesterday's MK video did reasonably well compared to recent stuff because of the clickbait "Extreme Lack Of Sleep" at the start of the title, because today's Epcot vlog is already firmly in backroads/baseball territory views-wise:

 
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Bigot Woo will not have anything nice to say about a Black Woman themed ride
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To be sure his viewing base are MAGAs & Bigots ..
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Clickbait thumbnails again
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But the orange/melon shorts are back, we can all breathe a sigh of relief
 
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I wonder if this current weight loss journey is as one last gasp to get Giggs to fall in love with him?
 
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I wonder if this current weight loss journey is as one last gasp to get Giggs to fall in love with him?
He needs to give that up. Beard has a lot of things going for him that David does not.

Beard - Somewhat good looking. Has a steady job. He seems like a good dude. Is in good shape.

David - None of the above.
 
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Well, he puts the words Splash Mountain in the title, so....

He's wearing a Michael Eisner and Mickey t-shirt, I guess he didn't want to get hammered for wearing a Splash t-shirt, but had to wear something early 90s since Splash Mt opened in 1992 at MK. He also gives a speech about how only today, June 28th, 2024, Splash Mountain is finally erased from history. A) it's not, it's completely documented in history. B) It closed a year and a half ago. What a dolt.

So let's do this all over, once again...

He's at art deco 7-11>>Mickey Power Pole>>Main WDW Welcome Sign>>MK Parking Lot Booths>>films the trams while in the line for parking>>parks car and films monorail as it passes above him (oh boy!)>>heavy metal Mickey>>monorail sighting again>>he gets on the monorail to the park entrance.

During all of this he explains he did get a virtual queue spot for Tiana's, and he's also hoping he can buy a Lightning Lane (because screw all those people on vacation, Adam needs to ride it twice to really get a feel for it). He also explains that while he's kept himself "spoiler free" (I mean, what does he think they've done, it's the same ride track and the same logs, it's just a different theme/characters with upgraded tech), his "friends" have told him that they enjoyed it.

Now, he says this with some surprise in his voice, and in fact he says "I'm hoping I might be pleasantly surprised". Which doesn't make sense because he also keeps repeating that he loves the Princess and the Frog movie and he likes the Tiana character (notice it goes from loving the movie to liking the character). My question is, if he loved the movie so much why wasn't he posting himself watching it Thursday night to get ready for the big ride opening on Friday?

Adam's first order of business is, say it with me....yes, merch. He gets in the dedicated line for Tiana merch (he hasn't even ridden yet and isn't sure he'll even like the ride). He points at a t-shirt and says he doesn't remember the characters riding in the log from the film (perhaps because they were created for the ride you haven't been on yet or seen, Adam?). Of course it's just Adam walking around the store, saying what an item is and then adding the phrases "right there", or "over here", as usual. Every time there are characters in a log, Adam notes that they are in single row seating, "set up like Disneyland". Adam, it just doesn't look right to have characters sitting side by side in the log for merchandise. So they do it like this. Stop losing your mind over it.

Adam makes sure he gets two pins, one a Passholder pin because did you know? He's a passholder!


Adam uses this opportunity, when mentioning he will put these next to his Splash pins on the pin board, at the 11:50 mark in the video, to say for the first time that "it will always be Splash Mountain to me, I'll tell people to meet me at Splash, I'm over at Splash". Then he gets very excited that one toy seems to have left the Brer Rabbit head on the front of the log.

He goes over to the ride and watches the logs dropping, and then like the glutton he is, does purchase a Lightning Lane for the ride so that he can experience it twice. However, he's upset that the only time he could get was 8:30pm. Heaven forbid Adam be forced to spend a WHOLE DAY in a WDW park like a commoner on vacation does!

He is just roaming around waiting for his boarding group to be called. He seems surprised that after the drop there is still that little spot where the water is splashing down the side of the rocks , before you enter back inside for the end scene. "Oh, they left that part where you get wet again!" he says. Is he this dense? It's the same ride!


Adam walks over by Big Thunder and actually laments the current Disney system of virtual queues and Lightning Lanes because while if you get it, it's a guarantee you will ride it, so many people miss out. THEY MISS OUT BECAUSE OF PEOPLE LIKE YOU WHO BOOK BOTH!!!! He says the excitement isn't the same. He would prefer that you have to arrive 3-4 hours before the park opened, because it's so much more fair to reward people who can get up at 2am to get in line in the dark at 4am. It's all about how Adam wants it like he first experienced it, that's all.

He starts complaining that the boarding groups have really slowed down and it's taking too long for him to ride. Then this chowder head shows up


Jay couldn't get a spot in the virtual queue or a LL. Here is the exact, word for word exchange between Adam and Jay:

Adam: "I have a Lightning Lane that I purchased for 8:30pm - we have a magic moment, we went to a cast member, Jose, over in Frontierland, and I said I wanted to give up my Lightning Lane for later if you could add Jay on to mine and what did the guy say?"
Jay: "He said yes"
Adam: "So you're riding with me buddy!!!"
Jay: "Dude, thank you so much Adam, thank you, I owe you"
Adam: "Riding former Splash Mountain is better with friends"

What a communicator. It took me some time to really figure out what happened here, Adam is so unclear. So Adam gave up his LL spot, and the cast member added Jay onto Adam's virtual queue. At first I thought the cast member added Jay and Adam didn't have to give up the LL spot, because Adam only said "if you could add Jay onto mine", which isn't clear at all.

Adam interviews another vlogger (I've never heard of the guy, Cool K's Adventures) who tells Adam that it's a different experience during the night vs the day. Groundbreaking news here folks - Splash was also different after dark, as is Big Thunder, Tron, and most other outdoor rides at night.

Then Tim Tracker shows up. Also of note: Adam is wearing the ORANGE SHORTS once again, two days in a row! Then it's time to get in the line...

Adam notes that the outdoor queue is NOT AS THEMED as it was when it was Splash (NEGATIVE). Tim (he's been on this ride, what, 100 times at this point, and is also taking a ride away from a child today) has to point out to Adam all the "easter eggs" dedicated to Splash to make him feel better, like this bear, fox and rabbit on a shelf:


Isn't it just amazing how it all worked out for Adam, Tim, and Jay to ride together? These three are constantly stopping to film things in the queue, and if I was behind them I'd ask them to step aside, please. Anytime Adam sees any picture of Louis the alligator, he says, "this guy is just so happy, how can you not be happy when you see him, he makes me happy."

Adam sounds like a complete idiot on the ride. "Here's the first of the big drops, I think there's three of these." You think? You're not sure? You think maybe they added a drop or took one out? Every drop he does the Ed McMahon "Hi-yooooo". He says he likes it, it's really "well done", but "it's not Splash". Every step of the way, he needs to say what used to be there - "this is where Brer Rabbit was hopping", "now we're going into the former Laughing Place", "ok, we're going up the hill but no more briar patch, no more vultures." He says an animated frog is playing "the kongos" (Freudian racist slip, Adam?)

His final review: "I'll definitely be going on this again over time." He says he thought it would be mediocre (why?, and why didn't he say that previously? We all knew he thought that, but why didn't he say it), but he says he was pleasantly surprised. But look at that wording. "I'll be going on this again over time." Here's what it reminds me of. On March 31st, he went to Animal Kingdom. He's gone there a few times over the past 6-8 months and each time he says he needs to go there more, but he never does. This last time, March 31st, he went and titled his video thusly:



He hasn't been there since. And who knows when he'll be back. But he devoted a whole video about finally "falling in love" with it. "I'll be going on this again over time" has the same vibes.

As he exits Tiana's he talks about where Mr. Bluebird was at the Exit sign, boo hoo, still can't stop talking about it. For $28 Adam buys a special opening day ride photo package so he and Tim and Jay can remember this moment forever. The poor family behind them probably didn't want the special photo as it's ruined by the middle aged, tatted vloggers dominating the space in front of them.


Adam ramps up his praise for the ride from "pleasantly surprised" to "that was awesome" and then really takes it over the top by saying that even though it's the same exact ride track and the same exact drops, that it's "a whole different experience", so it's clear he's now trying to overcompensate. And then he ends by saying, "I can't wait to go on it again at some point." Which again sounds a lot like "I'll be going on this again over time". If you're blown away, you say "I can't wait to go on it again". You don't add "at some point".

After exiting Adam notices all the logs are empty indicating an issue with the ride or potential incoming weather, further highlighting these three adults who can ride this ride any time in the future on any day they want to taking spots away from kids on vacation that may never be back. Adam has decided he wants the Bayou Lemonade. I'm sure it's much better than soda.

It begins to downpour, but to get the lemonade Adam needs to get over to the Friar's Nook in Fantasyland. So he just walks around in the rain, no umbrella as usual, his camera getting soaking wet (who cares, it's still the old one anyway). Then back to the Emporium to buy the Passholder t-shirt he said he wouldn't buy earlier, he wants it now because it is "date stamped".

Onto the monorail, back to the parking lot, back to the car, films the monorail (of course)


Says he could've stayed and tried for the 1pm virtual queue, but he didn't bother. But remember, he thought the ride was "awesome" and he "can't wait to ride it again"....at some point, whenever that may be.

It seems like every WDW video will end in the Corridor of Goons now...he feels compelled to show himself actually placing his pins on the pin board now for whatever reason. Here he backpedals on his "awesome" comments. He says, "I'm not saying it's the greatest ride ever, I was pleasantly surprised and better than I expected" (remember, he expected it to be "mediocre"). He ends with a shot of these pins, of course, and the vlog is over
 
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I'm sorry (not sorry) but he just looks like he smells.

And I've stood next to him and he didn't. But still, he just looks like he smells.
He probably doesn't if you find yourself near him on day one of the shorts. By day two or three though...
 
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The poor family behind them probably didn't want the special photo as it's ruined by the middle aged, tatted vloggers dominating the space in front of them.
If I was a CM and saw those asswipes board with their cameras, I'd wait to give a "magical moment" to the family behind them and let them board the NEXT log and leave those idiots in the log by themselves.

ETA: How the fuck are cameras like that still allowed on these rides? Like David and Tim have with the sticks and fuzzy balls?
Jay's looks tiny compared to theirs.
 
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