I know it’s cliche to say but do just take everything hour by hour. Write the day off as a bad one and draw a line under it. Sending positive vibes your way!
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You're allowed to post your viewpoint and you're allowed to moan. We all do it. I've been whinging all evening
Tomorrow will be a better day 
Thank you I know you’re right. Just feeling a bit sensitive/unhinged tonight. Hopefully tomorrow will be better.You're allowed to post your viewpoint and you're allowed to moan. We all do it. I've been whinging all evening
—-separate post—-
Just this second seen my step mum, who I’ve known since I was about 5 but rarely speak to these days because my dad never bothers to stay in touch is friends with an old friend/acquaintance of mine from school on Facebook and they’ve been commenting on each other’s posts and stuff as they must work together or something.
This makes me feel unreasonably salty because, well that’s MY step mum. I haven’t spoken to her properly in over a year but I’ve always thought she was brilliant and we’ve always got on well. How ever, step mum never comments on any of my social media posts, like ever. Thought she was just one of those people who never comments on stuff. So I’m sat here thinking wtf? You’ll talk to some almost stranger you met through work but literally never ever comment or make the effort to speak to me? Even when I make the effort first? How is that FAIR? What have I done so wrong that one side of my family seems to dislike me so much that they never involve me in anything. Didn’t even know about my nan having cancer until she’d died of it. bleeping sucks.
I have a feeling you’ll be seeing a lot of me on this thread.
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Maybe she thinks you might think its uncool for stepmum to be liking stuff
. Its not uncommon for parents to steer clear.
You might be right, but then I hardly get a reply if I send her a message or something. I dunno. Hate social media though🥲Maybe she thinks you might think its uncool for stepmum to be liking stuff
uncommon for parents to steer clear.
Me too. It makes you overthink everything that you might not have thought if the conversation was in person. Do you feel like it’s appropriate to reach out to her? You could arrange a phone conversation and that might be easier? And less leg work on your part than trying to keep a message conversation going.
Some people day to day I find are in their own little bubble they forget to reach out or are preoccupied with what they’ve got going on. I mostly make the first move with my mum and dad. I think they think I’m always busy (I’m never too busy to speak to them but they seem to think I might be!) maybe that’s what’s happening with your stepmum too x
Oh I see. Is she approachable?. Maybe have a cuppa and a chat with her. I don't know why I'm giving advice because probably not helpful or you've already tried.
Me again. Back pain girl, haha. Absolutely bleeping sick of being in pain.
Had a good day Monday, finally able to walk about, managed to get to the shop for some bits I needed. Halfway round had to get my husband to go to the till and pay because I was in too much pain and been back on the sofa ever since. Just want a good nights sleep at this point.
Husband is trying but he just doesn’t clean things or make things how I would, he’s been excellent but with us stuck on lockdown and me stuck inside I just want everything to look nice and be clean and tidy and he just can’t do it how I would ( aware that’s a big first world problem but this is the thread to whinge haha). I just want to get better so I can get on and make things how they normally are.
I dunno. I just want a nice uninterrupted sleep and a tidy house. Things I took for granted before I hurt myself.
Had a good day Monday, finally able to walk about, managed to get to the shop for some bits I needed. Halfway round had to get my husband to go to the till and pay because I was in too much pain and been back on the sofa ever since. Just want a good nights sleep at this point.
Husband is trying but he just doesn’t clean things or make things how I would, he’s been excellent but with us stuck on lockdown and me stuck inside I just want everything to look nice and be clean and tidy and he just can’t do it how I would ( aware that’s a big first world problem but this is the thread to whinge haha). I just want to get better so I can get on and make things how they normally are.
I dunno. I just want a nice uninterrupted sleep and a tidy house. Things I took for granted before I hurt myself.
On Monday 4th I was arrested by the police for buying alcohol from a vendor. Spent the next 27 hours in a prison cell, released and charged, along with been handed a Written Notice, to appear in court 14th January,
I paid what is called here a "Admission of Guilt" fine, which means I won't have to appear in court because I have admitted guilt. However, it does mean I have a criminal record!
I admit my guilt, but I was desperate. I'm an alcoholic, but in South Africa the buying of alcohol is banned as part of the current lockdown. I had gone almost a week without a drink but I was becoming far more agitated and desperate to the point where I had to buy booze from illegal sources.
The problem/annoyance I have is that neither the police, the courts or the South African government have considered alcoholics such as myself, who are going a little cranky now that we can't get our fix!
As for me. I have a criminal record, that will live with me for the next 10 years. But it also means I still can't have a drink. My only option is to return to the UK. But from I understand England is currently in another lockdown, and I don't think they're accepting people flying in from South Africa
Therefore, I seem to be stuck between a rock and a hard place. And I still need a drink!
I paid what is called here a "Admission of Guilt" fine, which means I won't have to appear in court because I have admitted guilt. However, it does mean I have a criminal record!
I admit my guilt, but I was desperate. I'm an alcoholic, but in South Africa the buying of alcohol is banned as part of the current lockdown. I had gone almost a week without a drink but I was becoming far more agitated and desperate to the point where I had to buy booze from illegal sources.
The problem/annoyance I have is that neither the police, the courts or the South African government have considered alcoholics such as myself, who are going a little cranky now that we can't get our fix!
As for me. I have a criminal record, that will live with me for the next 10 years. But it also means I still can't have a drink. My only option is to return to the UK. But from I understand England is currently in another lockdown, and I don't think they're accepting people flying in from South Africa
Therefore, I seem to be stuck between a rock and a hard place. And I still need a drink!
I promise I’m saying this kindly but I know that written words can come across wrong as they don’t carry tone but I really am feeling very compassionate towards you, could you try and use this as a time where you really try to tackle your drinking problem head on? Ask for help and try to get to the root of the issues. Try to see this as an opportunity? I will never fully understand how you feel or how hard it is to actually be an alcoholic but I watched my mum and my Nan both die of alcoholism and my dads alcoholism was a contributing factor towards his death. Please please reach out for help. I’m not being dismissive of you being an alcoholic and how hard that must be but I do have a lot of experience. When you post on various threads here you seem like someone who has such a lot going for you, I really hope you can battle this demon and win
I had noticed you hadn't posted in a while and wondered if everything was ok over there.
I've got no personal experience with what you're going through but can appreciate the struggles and desperation you must be feeling.
I know tattle has a bad rep in the outside world but the reality is it's full of supportive people so you've always got here to try and escape to, or rant, or cry, or whatever you feel in that moment. Hope things get easier for you
My rant is that I'm sick of being stuck at home and not being able to go to uni. I have no friends in my city and I miss everyone.
I was not used to live with my parents after living by myself for a whole year. We are all mentally struggling and they're on the edge of a divorce.
These Xmas holidays made it worse and we've been arguing with each other a lot.
I really cannot wait to go back to normality and leave this house cos I'm going mad. Thank God I have the help of a psychologist to help me get through this otherwise I wouldn't know what would happen.
I was not used to live with my parents after living by myself for a whole year. We are all mentally struggling and they're on the edge of a divorce.
These Xmas holidays made it worse and we've been arguing with each other a lot.
I really cannot wait to go back to normality and leave this house cos I'm going mad. Thank God I have the help of a psychologist to help me get through this otherwise I wouldn't know what would happen.
My colleague openly telling us how great her Christmas was...she left tier 4 with her boyfriend and stayed up north with his family for 5 days and then from there they travelled to Scotland to stay with her family for 10 days and laughing that she was a criminal.
Her and all her family then visited her nan who is in her 80s. But then on the call she was moaning about how upset she is about lockdown not realising that not everyone got to see their families and it's because of people like her that we're in this position.
In my head I've cut ties with her. We were work friends but I can't cope with selfish, entitled people.
Ive decided I want nothing to do with her.
Her and all her family then visited her nan who is in her 80s. But then on the call she was moaning about how upset she is about lockdown not realising that not everyone got to see their families and it's because of people like her that we're in this position.
In my head I've cut ties with her. We were work friends but I can't cope with selfish, entitled people.
Ive decided I want nothing to do with her.
Thanks for the kind words, and I have been trying to reduce my dependence on alcohol both when I was living in England and here in J'burg. I have reached out to others in the same boat here via Zoom, and we're all supporting each other as best we can. But it is incredibly difficult because even though we want to cut back on the booze, we still want it available to us - and this is something that isn't legally possible here.I promise I’m saying this kindly but I know that written words can come across wrong as they don’t carry tone but I really am feeling very compassionate towards you, could you try and use this as a time where you really try to tackle your drinking problem head on? Ask for help and try to get to the root of the issues. Try to see this as an opportunity? I will never fully understand how you feel or how hard it is to actually be an alcoholic but I watched my mum and my Nan both die of alcoholism and my dads alcoholism was a contributing factor towards his death. Please please reach out for help. I’m not being dismissive of you being an alcoholic and how hard that must be but I do have a lot of experience. When you post on various threads here you seem like someone who has such a lot going for you, I really hope you can battle this demon and win
These politicians have the best of intentions, but they sometimes overlook people like us who would rather end up with the virus than be deprived of a drink.
I just feel done with it all.
I’m self employed and don’t think my business will survive this lockdown. My husband and I were on the edge of divorce last time, things had gotten better but i can see us back there. I had to shoulder all the home schooling and children last lockdown in March plus housework and cooking and try and keep my business afloat all while constantly tip toeing around so husband could work on the phone. It nearly did me in.
I’m dreading this time. Husband promises he’ll help more but he won’t, he’s so lazy. Yesterday I complained he was selfish for just making his lunch and not asking anyone else while I got the kids food ready and had to wait for mine. He promised he’d be better then did exactly the same thing today, when I asked him today he just rolled his eyes - but why should it all fall on me?! My youngest wraps him around his finger and although I’d told him no he wasn’t going out for a walk he went and asked husband who immediately jumped up and took him out. When I just pulled them up on it as they were leaving (like hang on I said no) it just caused another row and youngest leaving in tears. So now I feel guilty when he’s the one being manipulative.
Youngest child and I have a terrible relationship, he genuinely hates me (and has told me this several times and can’t wait to leave home) and is a handful for me plus he hates home schooling, last time I was in tears daily due to the way he speaks to me and it all just feeling too hard. Eldest is good and just gets on with stuff which makes me feel like I neglect him but I’m worried about his schooling this time and feel he needs pushing as he does the very bare minimum. I think home schooling is important as this is long term and will effect their futures.
I don’t feel like I have any friends. I’m struggling with my business and part of me thinks just shut and walk away so I can get through the next few months (I don’t believe for a second the kids will be in school before September) yet the other part of wants to cry when I think of giving it all up. We are very thankfully financially stable so I just wonder if I close to draw a line under it all and remove one stress...then I worry what I’ll do in a years time as I’m unqualified for everything.
Just feeling so down today. Just dreading the next few months as this bleeping virus is robbing us all of so so much. My heart aches when I think of all people who needs help and imply aren’t getting it.
I’m so sorry for being self indulgent. I am very thankful to have a house and be okay, today is just really hard. I’m not sure what’s the point of me being around anymore.
I’m self employed and don’t think my business will survive this lockdown. My husband and I were on the edge of divorce last time, things had gotten better but i can see us back there. I had to shoulder all the home schooling and children last lockdown in March plus housework and cooking and try and keep my business afloat all while constantly tip toeing around so husband could work on the phone. It nearly did me in.
I’m dreading this time. Husband promises he’ll help more but he won’t, he’s so lazy. Yesterday I complained he was selfish for just making his lunch and not asking anyone else while I got the kids food ready and had to wait for mine. He promised he’d be better then did exactly the same thing today, when I asked him today he just rolled his eyes - but why should it all fall on me?! My youngest wraps him around his finger and although I’d told him no he wasn’t going out for a walk he went and asked husband who immediately jumped up and took him out. When I just pulled them up on it as they were leaving (like hang on I said no) it just caused another row and youngest leaving in tears. So now I feel guilty when he’s the one being manipulative.
Youngest child and I have a terrible relationship, he genuinely hates me (and has told me this several times and can’t wait to leave home) and is a handful for me plus he hates home schooling, last time I was in tears daily due to the way he speaks to me and it all just feeling too hard. Eldest is good and just gets on with stuff which makes me feel like I neglect him but I’m worried about his schooling this time and feel he needs pushing as he does the very bare minimum. I think home schooling is important as this is long term and will effect their futures.
I don’t feel like I have any friends. I’m struggling with my business and part of me thinks just shut and walk away so I can get through the next few months (I don’t believe for a second the kids will be in school before September) yet the other part of wants to cry when I think of giving it all up. We are very thankfully financially stable so I just wonder if I close to draw a line under it all and remove one stress...then I worry what I’ll do in a years time as I’m unqualified for everything.
Just feeling so down today. Just dreading the next few months as this bleeping virus is robbing us all of so so much. My heart aches when I think of all people who needs help and imply aren’t getting it.
I’m so sorry for being self indulgent. I am very thankful to have a house and be okay, today is just really hard. I’m not sure what’s the point of me being around anymore.
I’m not sure what help is out there for your business from the government from what I’ve heard it’s not great, but have you got every penny you possibly can from them? If you’re allowed to open but feel like it’s not worth it then definitely considering closing temporarily till the lockdown eases. Or reducing your opening hours to take some pressure off? Don’t give it up permanently if you enjoy what you do
it sounds like you’re putting so much pressure on yourself to do everything. The home schooling thing I can imagine is ridiculously hard.You can only do your best though remember that and if it’s not going well step back and try another approach. CBBC is putting a lot of stuff on the tv for the kids on weekdays even putting that on is something on a day when it’s going not so well. As for the husband might be worth having a sit down chat and reminding him of what nearly happened. Hopefully he takes it serious and helps you. Ita hard to be optimistic and positive but it will come. Might be in6 months but we will get through this xx
It’s not self indulgent at all. Please don’t feel like it is. I promise you everything you are feeling is valid. It’s awful when things pile on top of each other. You have to put yourself first and if talking about things on here helps, that’s what you need to do. It’s so much healthier than pretending everything is fine.
Do you get any time on your own, to read a book (or Tattle!) or watch something easy and light on Netflix? It also might help to list the things you’re worried about and see where you could find solutions or at least think about if you could reframe them, even slightly, in your head. Might make things seem more manageable.
Just some ideas, no idea if they’ll help but one day at a time and I promise there is SO much point in you being around
I wondered if you were ok as you weren’t on the Q&A thread. Have you looked at some of the sober insta accounts maybe? I agree it must be a bloody nightmare without a drink but you are a week in now which is a massive achievement. Hope you’re OK x
My PS4 won’t let me play without resetting and losing all my save data
I left my job due to personal reasons in November. I've had numerous interviews since then and I haven't been successful. My next one is on 12th January and is a HR role, what I'm experienced in. My boyfriend has been really supportive up until now. For months he dismissed my building stress and said we'd be fine in January.
The past few days we've been shouting at each other, arguing and I've been in tears all evening because he wants me to start my own business. I've never done anything like this before but he thinks this will help me pay my share of the rent until I get a job. His idea is to make up some tat boxes and sell them on Facebook (we all know the kind) I refused because its not something I've ever done or will do, it's something EVERYONE is doing and I don't give a duck if Sharon at work did it and made some cash, i'm not doing it. I want a stable income and I'm not wasting money on stuff I can't afford that might not even sell because its literal tat.
This was my point in one of our arguments and he came back at me with "nothings bleeping working for you now is it?" and had a really smug, nasty grin on his face referring to the fact I've been rejected from lots of jobs. I had a bath, got dressed and went for a walk without saying a word to him. On my walk i rang my dad who's agreed to lend me money for rent (Saint
) so I came home and put the money in the bills account. Bf must've seen the Monzo notification and for some reason is now sulking in bed.
I can't be arsed with him thinking he's right all the time and knows everything. I've had a tit few months (as we all have) and I have been battling with newishly diagnosed BPD. I've run out of tablets I take and my prescription isn't going to be ready until tomorrow. I'm sick and tired of him doing nothing around the house either!!! I came back to our cats food open and left on the side dried jelly that ofc muggins here will clean up
The past few days we've been shouting at each other, arguing and I've been in tears all evening because he wants me to start my own business. I've never done anything like this before but he thinks this will help me pay my share of the rent until I get a job. His idea is to make up some tat boxes and sell them on Facebook (we all know the kind) I refused because its not something I've ever done or will do, it's something EVERYONE is doing and I don't give a duck if Sharon at work did it and made some cash, i'm not doing it. I want a stable income and I'm not wasting money on stuff I can't afford that might not even sell because its literal tat.
This was my point in one of our arguments and he came back at me with "nothings bleeping working for you now is it?" and had a really smug, nasty grin on his face referring to the fact I've been rejected from lots of jobs. I had a bath, got dressed and went for a walk without saying a word to him. On my walk i rang my dad who's agreed to lend me money for rent (Saint
) so I came home and put the money in the bills account. Bf must've seen the Monzo notification and for some reason is now sulking in bed.I can't be arsed with him thinking he's right all the time and knows everything. I've had a tit few months (as we all have) and I have been battling with newishly diagnosed BPD. I've run out of tablets I take and my prescription isn't going to be ready until tomorrow. I'm sick and tired of him doing nothing around the house either!!! I came back to our cats food open and left on the side dried jelly that ofc muggins here will clean up
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