feathering the empty nest : Most liked Posts

I’m glad I’ve found this thread, I unfollowed the rave thread after being jumped on over a different bloody opinion, and have only just discovered this one! I’ve unfollowed Elle this afternoon, I used to love her and her account but it’s obvious she’s only back to eventually promote her book, all the small business shares are a bit odd, and it’s all she seems to be doing, It also feels strange to be following someone who’s account was based around the loss of their child, but is now refusing to ‘acknowledge’ a second child on the gram when she’s shared so much of Teddy’s story before, it’s just all feels a bit disingenuous to be honest, and I’m not really sure why she is on Instagram anymore. I just feel sorry for the many women who’ve reached out to her in the past about losses who have now unceremoniously had the door shut in their face now she has her rainbow baby, feels like it’s almost gaslighting her own followers in a way.

I told my SIL about this thread as she was the one who Elle belittled, brushed aside and blocked when she reached out to her. Her bloody book asked people to reach out to her, but that's a whole other story.
I agree, she was all ears if you're someone with celebrity connections - so ironic as my SIL works in PR and has many, Elle only needed to ask
Anyway, cut to the chase. Told SIL that others had similar experiences and she already knew as she's spoken out to other people who've also been treated the same, including one lady who also lost her baby full term just like Elle.
As I said previously, she owes nothing to anyone, but don't preach the whole 'reach out to me' narrative if you're going to just block people who are feeling emotionally vulnerable. Don't tell people what they can and can't say to someone experiencing a loss when you turn around to them to say their loss "isn't as bad as" yours. I've heard people say she's aa nice as pie in real life if she needs something, but equally she will be rude and step on others if they are beneath her or serve her no purpose. Reading how she's rude to shop staff etc comes as no surprise. I just really detest people who treat others differently according to what they have or what they can exploit them for. Treat the CEO and the cleaner exactly the same and you'll honestly go so much further in life Elle. And if you don't want people reading out to you, then don't ask for it when promoting your books.
I feel she's exploited her loss and she's exploiting women who have experienced a loss. There's no doubt she has helped charities and families, but she's definitely profited from them too. I'm sorry if that offends anyone but it's the truth and it really doesn't sit well.

I’ve followed Elle for years I think when she had like 20k followers.. I am a bit torn. I’ve always loved her account.. wish her all the best as she’s been through a lot butttt



I think she is very within her rights to ask people to not message her directly for support. There is only one of her, she hasn’t a huge team behind her to give support with her messages. Also the anxiety, like she was pregnant she had enough of her own worries. She wrote her first book and has raised funds and so people can be signposted to those charities



I think it’s fine for her to sign post people to her book, ultimately, yes she wrote that to make money, it’s a job but I’m sure she genuinely did set out to actually help people in her shoes.



My issue is this, she did make a job and made a lot of money from her followers. She shared Teddy’s life and loss and made money from that. She did a lot

Of good too of course. She stayed true to herself as well when she rejected the baby goods from companies. Not many influencers do that they just say yes to it all’s



And then she gives birth to Olivia. She’s more than entitled to have a break of any time length. Or to not come back at all.



But it feels like she’s got so many people invested into her life and pregnancy with her etc. And of feels like she went off and kept her maternity private and came back with a Big Bang and a book and now wants everyone’s money!! Like?! It just doesn’t sit well with me at all.



I understand she needs to make money and wants to write a book and she did announce the delivery of her baby girl which was nice to share but she just screams megxcit to me



‘No exposure no contacting me please nothing at all”



Oh but wait... knock knock?!



“But can you plssss buy my second book?”



I did notice the post didn’t get a lot of likes, I wonder if others agree. I have a feeling they do.



She should also say which percentage goes to Tommy’s from the book. I mean it could be 0.2p for all we know.

P.s. And heels comment was so transparent.. I remember when she went on her stories when Elle announced her pregnancy and did “I’m so glad the secrets out now as I hate keeping secrets I remember when Elle came over to tell me” if you’re true friends they you don’t need to try and convince us all you are lol!!

I feel really conflicted about Elle. I’ve followed her since way back when she was “Mrs Elle Wright” rather than FTEN and I always really liked her. Her story was so heartbreaking and she always seemed really humbled by Teddy’s death. I enjoyed her blog and her interior photos too, I didn’t just follow her because her baby died. I think she really opened a lot of people’s eyes to baby loss and infant death and I think that was her objective which is commendable.

I think she then became just another influencer sadly and I went off her a bit. The gifts, the ads etc. And I know she said it was her job and she was within her rights to earn an income, but I don’t know it just felt off.

And now she’s back on the gram I’ve gone off her again I feel like the whole “small business sharing” everyday is a bit of a humble brag - it’s too extremely different from the ‘influencer’ she had become. And emphasising the fact she BOUGHT all the things like yes round of applause you’ve not been gifted them, but a lot of the companies she shows are fucking expensive and it comes across a bit braggy!

The fact she hasn’t show the baby or given an update on her what her life is like with her daughter is something I find odd, seeing as she’s always been so open about talking about Teddy, showing his face and her experience of being a mum without a living baby. And I completely get that it’s her right to do whatever she wants, I get that I’m not saying she owes us anything, I just find it all strange.

So to conclude, I’m not sure how I feel about her now I think she’s trying too hard to be the perfect person online rather than just being authentic, which is a shame really because a lot of her followers really like her as a person and wish her well, and I’m sure would be so pleased to see how her life is at the minute with her new baby.

Nellyboy said:

I like your very tongue in cheek response! I know that some of the things that have been said are quite unkind. I do think Boris is an UD, I used to think he was ok but Eleanor turned me off him when she was making videos etc about him. I think an ‘influencer’ with 170k followers (was 193k the other day?) should have better content than that. The gingham dress, well I thought it was so 1970s and so Surrey huns She does have a crooked smile, only really point that out because she acts as though she is above others and something really special and she’s not. I have to say she defo brings out the worst in me and therefore I’m probably a bit unkind when it comes to her. No excuses from me but she was rude and unkind to me some time ago after I had followed her for years and supported her with messages and donations etc. So I don’t feel any guilt at all for calling her and her fakeness out. Imo she needs a massive shot of humility and to be more humble and develop a less holier than thou attitude.

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I don't like her and I'm definitely not having a go at you! I had a run in with her once, a few years ago. It was tiny compared to the experiences of others. I asked her something (not about babies) and she sent a bit of a "I don't do things like this, because I'm so popular and busy". She linked it to Teddy and made me feel terrible. I honestly felt like a really bad person, hounding her, (though only one brief DM). I got so screwed up and felt so guilty. I was nearly in tears. Then her very next post was about something practically identical but less kind and completely selfish and self promoting. It really knocked me because she had used Teddy. Thinking about this stresses me even now.

Until I saw this thread I'd carried that guilt round with me, all this time. It sounds stupid, I know. But reading this made me realise that she's good at this. All the comments have been about quite specific situations. It's not a general nastiness, it's actually targeted. She uses Teddy as a weapon and I feel like I'm going to go to hell for saying this. What's really sad is her power. This side of her has never been spoken about before. She's had so many chances. My run in with her is trivial compared to things she's said to people who have lost their babies and I'm not in any way comparing my situation to this. But I think she was horrible and manipulated me because I'm really quite sensitive and lacking confidence. I bet she hasn't done any of this to strong people, or people who are useful.

I still like the dress and Boris! But this thread has been the hardest to read and post in because I, like the rest of us, have supported her for so long and shed tears for Teddy. Her abuse of that support and kindness is horrible to read about.

She’s very pally with Gettingstuffdoneinheels. And that is one massive twat. Make of that what you like.

I think, also as someone who has experienced debilitating losses, that Elle skates very close to commercialising grief. Her child’s death is the only reason she has a large Instagram following. This doesn’t negate the good she has done or her immense grief, but it doesn’t sit well with me.

Maybe she needs two accounts? A ‘personal’ account for advertising and a ‘charity’ account for fundraising? Then she’d be beyond reproach.

#aff said:

Elle clearly reads here, it was mentioned that the old house wasn’t that big on here a while back, hence her repeatedly saying ‘this little house’

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She definitely reads here as she blocked me on insta with no reason other than she saw my post on here and then went to the hassle of searching her DMs for our conversation I mentioned here.

I totally understand her taking time away from social media as it does feel there have been lot of pregnancy announcements lately. So on the face of that I do feel for her. But it didn't stop her pre Christmas parading around in expensive outfits and OTT Xmas Dec's whilst a lot of people can't put food on the table. She's quick enough to point out how social media can be tough for her, whilst not reading the room with her own posts in the current climate. Sorry Elle, pot, kettle, black. Brag brag brag 🥱 with more money than people will ever see

PlainJane91 said:

She really fucked me off when she hinted she knew about the book previously... like one of those Facebook dickheads who comment on pregnancy announcements ‘So glad the news is finally out...’ DO ONE HUN


Point well made!!

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Those comments on the pregnancy posts do me in Like ooh look at me I'm one of the chosen few to know the secret and you peasants had to wait for the announcement.

To be honest I'm not really sure how I feel about her needing to tell everyone that it was written pre Olivia. During that time she was busy telling people she was trying to take her mind off everything and didn't really want to think of the possibilities of what could happen in case the worst was to happen again. When actually she was busy writing it in a book so that she could sell it.

allaboutthegraminnit said:

Why post from your hospital bed? Why does this need to be shared? It’s terrible, really really sad that this has happened. But why does everything need to make it onto Instagram?

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I’ve had miscarriages before and the last thing on my mind is taking a photo! It’s baffling

Hello. New here,hope I'm posting this correctlyI first started following Elle early 2017 as she was totally relatable to myself..but in the last year i really feel as though she's pulled away and become rather obnoxious and extremely arrogant..almost like she's saying oh hi,got what I've always wanted now so goodbye and F you all..all this please dont message me as I can't help was so rude and could have been put in a better way! I think the fact she ended up with a big following just got to her head. Also, correct me if I'm wrong,but im sure on her pregnancy announcement she stated it wouldn't turn in to a new mums account and it would still be a "safe place"..yet there she is on stories bombarding us all with her fav baby buysalso her feed of late is poor,I can't see people staying to see photos of a plant pot..I think she needs to come back down to planet earth or pull her head out of her backside. At the end of the day she lives in a small 3 bed semi with off road parking,she's not so different from her followers yet she flouces around like she's lady Eleanor of Surrey i think trying to keep up with more obviously wealthy influencers turns these people in to bitter women with huge chip on their shoulder! Sad really

I reached out to Elle about sharing my story on the mums voice blog. I don’t want to give any details which would out me but my story is quite unusual and I would like to use it to help other people. I was basically told no the next blog series will only be BAME contributions (as I’ve only just discovered they exist ha ha!)

Gemgemgemgem said:

100%
It's 2021, women especially shouldn't be judging other women by their looks or size or outfits. We have enough men trying to enforce the patriarchal idea that women are only worth their looks. If we keep judging each other like this, they are putting us where there want us, divide and conquer and all that. If we big each other up, we will become more powerful.
(fu@k me where the heck did that all just come from?!!)
Let us just judge on how people treat others. Elle's a douche.

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Oh bore off. She’s an attractive, well off, middle class, white woman. Please just let us say she dresses like an old woman without everybody getting their knickers in a twist.

Snookie said:

Anyone watching her on sky news this morning?

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Things I would rather do than give her any publicity:
Shit in my hands and clap
Poke myself in the eye
Voluntarily spend time with my mother in law
Give myself an colonoscopy

Uh there’s plenty more but there we go.

She was one of my faves but I've had to unfollow. She isn't bothered by instagram, good for her, enjoy the baby. But shut it down if you are done with it. As others have said a thank you and goodbye post would have been better than to come back to flog the book, without any actual stories anymore

Daisydenim said:

She should really get Amazon to change this if she doesn't want people getting in touch

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That exact paragraph about wanting people who've experienced loss was the reason my SIL contacted her. Never in a million years would she have thought she'd get the dismissive replies she did. Should have said "reach out to me so I can tell you your loss isn't as bad as mine and it's not my problem".

I do think it’s odd that after sharing so much of Teddy, photos etc, that her daughter is completely absent from her account. Maybe I can understand the no photos, but she doesn’t even mention her. She really acts like she doesn’t want to be back, and if that’s the case (and fair enough if if it) then just close the account and disappear.

Yeah, I agree, it’s a little strange.

I don’t have any interest in seeing the little one at all. I don’t even follow FTEN anymore or see her stories. I just find it a little strange that Elle wanted this brand new chapter with her much wanted baby, made a huge thing about how she was leaving this Instagram account etc, to then return with the most boring and random content. It’s strange how she pretty much spoke about Teddy all the time but seldom mentions his sibling. I get that the account was dedicated to Teddy and her coming to terms with the horrendous loss in her empty nest, but thankfully for Elle, her nest is no longer empty. To keep posting but never mentioning her daughter is so strange. Especially after revealing so much prior to this - even poor baby Teddy’s stillborn photo.
I dunno, it’s her life and her social media, it just seems as though (and this will sound awful), that she's profited off her baby’s death and created this poor childless woman narrative for herself, got popular, brands felt sympathy for her so sent her free stuff. She got her happily ever after, misses the instafame and freebies so is dipping her toe back in practically screaming “I’m doing a Reno give me free stuff”. Doesn’t sit right with me, but who am I to judge?!