cleaning with mario : Most liked Posts

So went on trippy just to see if he had put a review on and lo and behold
Who did this ? I fkin love you !!

Not long hens.

Hay hens! 🩷

I think wee Marion has been manifesting for me.
After 4 long years, I finally had the all clear.
I mop kicked the bespoke cancer. Thanks all for being my distraction here and making me piss myself daily.
So much to offer and newness.
Tons blessings
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

My little crotch goblin arrived safely yesterday evening. He says hello to his cunt aunts oan this vile app!

I’ve been away since Saturday and Mario has done fuck all!

When your 5 year old goes to his first jiu jitsu class at the local community centre and you ask him what he’s learned…

Right… the tea.

So without compromising ma security (and if you recognise me from this- no you don’t), I speak at a lot of corporate events related to ma bespoke fuhltime joab that pays for the front, back, and patio doors I bought off the bank. At one today, I got speaking to someone who was on the same panel (a presentation and discussion about brands who jump on bandwagons - eg, change their logo to a rainbow in June, sponsor an event in Dubai in July kind of thing). We got talking afterwards and she was telling me about a similar event she did for International Women’s Day and guess what she covered? Influencers. Including oor Mario.

It focused on the 99% cunt women debacle of 2024, and how he had a Joy of Clean ad/sponsored/gift whatever at the same time. Apparently, her talk generated a number of complaints to Joy of Clean and they dropped him.

Now, I can’t verify this (and I didn’t want to expose myself as a Tattler so had to feign a bit of ignorance, plus she was talking to me from a work perspective rather than a gossip about Mario in particular- she was chatting about several influencers, mainly American and ) but I had a look back and he hasn’t had any blagged JoC items in months (since March- which would coincide with the timing). Plus JoC do MrsHinch’s shite products and he hasn’t received any Hinch freebies in ages.

So my theory is that the Cunt Women post did generate complaints (either at the time in 2024, or some in 2024 but more in 2025), Joy of Clean bladklisted him, and he’s fallen out with Hinch because she can’t/won’t give him any freebies despite sending out basket loads to dozens of other people.

So, if this is true, I wonder if he knows or if he’s scratching his baldy head wondering why the postman hasn’t come knocking on Beirut mini-Macy’s only door with JoC/Hinch products in so long?

(When he reads here, I predict a reel next week back in Beirut poking any old bottle of Flash out from under the sink and pretending it’s just been gifted).

I could be way off but the timing kind of makes sense?

I’ve no been oan tattle fae a while ma lovelies. I’ve been busy wae getting myself pregnant at the grand age of 46. Turns out I’m 4 months gone and was with wean when I had my tits done! I thought I was due ma change of life, like oor Marion.

My 28 year old son is disgusted, the girls are happy yet sickened after the shock me and Mr Bail are happy and terrified. So that’s a little baby Mario coming in June. I wonder if I’ll have mine before Mario is blessed wae a babby

On his wee surgeon journey

HAPPY BIRTHDAY PAM ST CLEMENTS YOU DON’T LOOK A DAY OLDER THAN 59.

jolene89 said:

Can someone photoshop Marion’s face on Sam smiths outfit fae the brits the night please? Will give me a bespoke laugh whilst I’m knee deep in those lethal drinks #ginandtonic

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Sorry it's late ma lovelie.

Away in a bedsit
There's a plush bespoke bed
Where the little shit Mario
Lays down his thumb head
The stars from the nightlight
Looked down where he lay
The little shit Mario
Fuhl rent must he pay

Don’t say ahm no gid to youse aw

bathedinhisblood said:

My dream is for wee dezza to reveal himself from curtain to balcony wearing a little Spanish dress what people bring home to the kids of the family, maz got it on sale at the market he ran didn't walk (well he couldn't actually because of chafing needs a bespoke snag journey) deek with his 5 jet black hairs piled on top the slender black lurex hugging his sleek bod shoulder to boaby then boaby to floor is where the lustrous red polka dot flamenco skirt takes place, a beautiful fan in his tk maxx bag

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That was day 1 hen, you must have missed it.

Well 2023 has been extremely uneventful for I, Daisy Uncle of Paisley.

Achieved absolutely fuck all. Spent all his petty cash on plastic & polyester and is now in an unmanageable amount of debt.

Made 1 overnight trip to London, paid for by his #bestie who booked him the smallest cheapest room with a tiny single bed. Needed to be collected by Deed Deek as he was unable to get a train by himself.

Applied to Insta for a blue tick at a cost of £10.99 per month, then pretended he knew nothing about it, and tried to imply Instagram had recognised his international fame and awarded said blue tick without his knowledge.

Decided to stop cutting his ain hair with a pizza cutter and went to a professional salon. Unfortunately (for him, nae us) his barber of choice, Nathan was a Tattler & butcherd him.

Telt us he would nae be going tae see Barbie, then went tae see Barbie.

Revealed he was going on holiday in 2024 to Lanzarote, and bought his clothes & suncream a year in advance. Didn't disclose where he was staying so he didnae compromise his security, but then posted on the FB page for the Be Live Experience Lanzarote Beach Hotel.

Dragged his cunt washings roond tae the brothers house tae use the washing line & play hoose.
Pictured himself in brothers hot tub in a lime green bikini.

Covered his kitchen worktops in sticky back plastic for the 14th time.

Celebrated his 40th birthday.
Notable gifts were a colouring book, some crisps and a charrum for his bracelet.
His "friends" planned a big night oot where they all got glammed up to the nines, they thought it would be funny to no tell him & let him turn up in wee lassies trainers and Pat Butchers cardigan.
Received a bunch of dead flowers.

Put his Halloween decorations up in July, then announced that he hated them.

Put his Christmas decorations up in September then announced in November he was sad Christmas was coming to an end.

Was asked by a follower if he has learning difficulties.

Was ill at least twice per month.

Bought 14 different Salt & Pepper pots.

Continued to use Klarna to make expensive online purchases, photograph them for Instagram then return them.

Nay wunner we, the Virus community are all jealous of his life. Also

New York in America
Gold in weight
Hard of English
Earth and soul

Tons blessings, roll on 2024, let's get this year done

Thread suggestion -

How The Hinch Stole Mario's Christmas.

Lindsay Rotte 2024: Left a piece of his heart
Gran Can 2025: Left 90% of his skin

Ferguson said:

@hopethishelpsallthebest
If youse get a spare minute

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He cannae be fucking serious. Be like putting Vera Wang on Vicky Pollard, so aye.