gummy-bear
VIP Member
This actually has made me really sad. Massive respect to her. X
jackolantern
VIP Member
Noone is telling her to go home and wait to die. That's an absurd suggestion. Just that there are surely better uses of her time than flogging ads for bloody anti-aging skincare and sports leggings that aren't even relevant to her. Would anyone look back on their final moments and be glad they spent them like that? I sincerely doubt it. I feel like her coping mechanisms are preventing her from actually making the most of the time she has left.
Also Deborah aside, it is immoral that any brand would do this. They are quite literally using a dying woman's views for sales. Sick and twisted beyond all belief.
Also Deborah aside, it is immoral that any brand would do this. They are quite literally using a dying woman's views for sales. Sick and twisted beyond all belief.
I am literally speechless regarding the latest invisiligne posts/stories. Everything about it is just SO wrong, the exploitation of her 14 year old son, the fact she is terminally ill in hospital and not forgetting she could probably pay for this without having to do the whole #ad thing anyway… who is it for and what/why is she doing it?!
LittleMissRuby
VIP Member
It's like banging your head against a brick wall speaking to those of you defending her, she is NOT transparent about receiving private care, in fact she refers to NHS more often than not. She is a self entitled brat, nothing more. She is not immune from criticism just because she is dying. She chooses to put herself out there and people don't like the way she behaves. Its called freedom of speech. She doesn't have to read her, her ego and narcissism forward her here. If I can step away from social media for my mental health as and when I need to, then damn sure she is capable of doing so too. She could choose to focus on enjoying what's rest of her life, but instead chooses to document every little s**t she takes thru the medium of social media. It's on her if people have something to say about that.
Edited to add: not one of her posts for at least the last 6 months refer to her private care (her stories may have differed) but quite a few quote Royal Marsden NHS...you call that transparency?
Edited to add: not one of her posts for at least the last 6 months refer to her private care (her stories may have differed) but quite a few quote Royal Marsden NHS...you call that transparency?
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candyland_
VIP Member
I don’t think she has a proper bond with those kids.
Her story was slightly different on the podcast to what she wrote for The Sun. Would an ambulance really be robotic and just keep repeating ‘Are you sure you want an ambulance?’ In my experience they are as compassionate as they can be and still reassure you that an ambulance will there there when one is available, especially with a child screaming save my mummy down the phone
I know services are stretched but they won’t be as cold as she said they were.
Her story was slightly different on the podcast to what she wrote for The Sun. Would an ambulance really be robotic and just keep repeating ‘Are you sure you want an ambulance?’ In my experience they are as compassionate as they can be and still reassure you that an ambulance will there there when one is available, especially with a child screaming save my mummy down the phone
I know services are stretched but they won’t be as cold as she said they were.
jackolantern
VIP Member
I’ve always found it quite distasteful when people post ^ that kind of stuff when someone dies. It’s almost like boasting that they are still alive while using someone else’s death for clout. Like ah shit, sorry your dead but it’s reminded me of all the great things I can still do!
Maybe I’m cynical but I feel like if you are going to post a tribute, actually make it about the person and their life, not you.
Maybe I’m cynical but I feel like if you are going to post a tribute, actually make it about the person and their life, not you.
jackolantern
VIP Member
I do think it’s lovely she has such a good relationship with her mum. I think a lot of us when feeling bad revert to a childlike status and just want our mum. I have a horrid relationship with mine and she’s the last person I turn to so I’m glad Deborah has hers, especially as her husband seems to be a walking wet wipe. I don’t think she’d still be here if she hadn’t had her mum this whole time tbh. You never stop being a mum no matter how old your child is. They are always your baby.
BettyCrockerr
VIP Member
The truth is that both Deborah and Monique are at very similar states in their disease - both are nearing the end of the treatment they can have and sadly both are nearing the end of their lives. But look at the difference in the way they are behaving and handling the situation. Monique is dealing with it with grace, light and spending time with her nearest & dearest and trying to find some quality of life and a sliver of hope even though she knows it’s futile. Deborah is ranting on about “trolls” and trying to flog some shite on Instagram.
Blonde_moment
Chatty Member
Just seen her Instagram post. Heartbreaking 
Very honest from her and clear she knows she is out of options and approaching the end. I hope she gets to spend some precious time with her family in her final days. Never been her biggest fan, but that was hard to read
Very honest from her and clear she knows she is out of options and approaching the end. I hope she gets to spend some precious time with her family in her final days. Never been her biggest fan, but that was hard to read sparkleroot
Member
Complaining about trolling in The Sun is beyond sickening. The Sun is nothing but the worst type of journalistic trolling. It is full of rampant racism, misogyny and homophobia and if you write for the Sun you implicitly endorse all of those positions. It routinely degrades women on the basis of their appearance and sexualises them just for going about their normal life.
To write an article in the Sun complaining about people making negative remarks about how female celebrities look is so unbelievably hypocritical. So private individuals shouldn’t make negative comments only the disgusting publication she is writing in should?
To write an article in the Sun complaining about people making negative remarks about how female celebrities look is so unbelievably hypocritical. So private individuals shouldn’t make negative comments only the disgusting publication she is writing in should?
Asparagus123
VIP Member
I’ve followed her for ages and found this a bit rude some people would be genuinely worried about her and also not everyone has a family or people to spend Christmas with !!
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jackolantern
VIP Member
I know this obviously isn’t the case in either Monique or BBs situation but it does very much make me think back to how badly I wish we had assisted dying in this country. No one with a terminal illness who is otherwise mentally competent should have to suffer like this if they don’t wish to any further. My Dad and Grandma both chose to starve to death because they couldn’t take it anymore and no medication was enough - and even that was a long agonising process. It’s disgusting that we don’t chose to be born and we can’t even have some sort of say/dignity in situations like that. Someone shouldn’t need to be sedated while they wait for the inevitable anyway.
Gossipreadee
Well-known member
Obv not denying some of the issues that we are seeing here now. But if I can offer a little bit of reassurance I work in cancer care at a nhs hospital and the pathway is quicker in the nhs vs the local private hospital. We will look at your referral from the gp within 24hours of us getting it and will have u in within 2 weeks for investigations.
There is delays with some appointments not the ones above but with oncologists and other doctors purely because there just isn’t enough resources. When I see patients on the wards pain and things could be an issue however the technology accross the nhs is so slow and freezes, and when the wards are poorly staffed because of government cuts- it genuinely is better for a health care assistant to get a better paid job in retail. But it’s never ending for many to provide patients with the care that the patient needs and it frustatrates staff to no end because the answers are simple the government needs to fund the nhs properly. If you have one health care worker to 14 patients per shift that’s less than an hours care each and when you break that down it really isn’t enough for really unwell patients.
Further to that above comment. Someone on a salary of about 30k a year makes a healthcare contribution of about 1.5k in tax. In America it costs them about 5k+ for private insurance. The government here misuses our money. Where I live at the end of the tax year millions of pounds of work will be done unnecessarily to local roads to use up the remaining money in that sector when that money could be spent so much better in other public sectors and I am sure this must happen across the country. The government pulls a lot of strings with the nhs and wants it to fail. Some of the workers in the nhs are poor and may provide bad care but some provide bad care because they haven’t been trained properly due to underfunding.
There is delays with some appointments not the ones above but with oncologists and other doctors purely because there just isn’t enough resources. When I see patients on the wards pain and things could be an issue however the technology accross the nhs is so slow and freezes, and when the wards are poorly staffed because of government cuts- it genuinely is better for a health care assistant to get a better paid job in retail. But it’s never ending for many to provide patients with the care that the patient needs and it frustatrates staff to no end because the answers are simple the government needs to fund the nhs properly. If you have one health care worker to 14 patients per shift that’s less than an hours care each and when you break that down it really isn’t enough for really unwell patients.
Further to that above comment. Someone on a salary of about 30k a year makes a healthcare contribution of about 1.5k in tax. In America it costs them about 5k+ for private insurance. The government here misuses our money. Where I live at the end of the tax year millions of pounds of work will be done unnecessarily to local roads to use up the remaining money in that sector when that money could be spent so much better in other public sectors and I am sure this must happen across the country. The government pulls a lot of strings with the nhs and wants it to fail. Some of the workers in the nhs are poor and may provide bad care but some provide bad care because they haven’t been trained properly due to underfunding.
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jackolantern
VIP Member
I think the problem with the ads is what can the brands do? Can you imagine the shitstorm if they said to a dying woman, we aren't working with you because you look too sick now? It's this unprecedented grey area where really, the onus is on Deborah to not want to be doing them as most people wouldn't, but she's a strange case where she clearly still does. You'd like to think someone in her family would step up and save her from herself but maybe it literally is her only coping mechanism so they are afraid to. I don't know what the answer is really. Maybe better themed ads would help but I think at this stage, anything is just bad taste now. But then again, who are we to take the little she has left that is hers if it gets her through the day 
Will depend on various criteria...blood results, scans, histology - and whether she can tolerate further treatment and for this particular trial they are looking for very specific tumour characteristics ( specific tumour markers which involves sending some of her tumour for further in depth genetic analysis )...
disclaimer....I've worked in cancer research for over 15 years and seen massive changes in treatments based on clinical trials
lovesmyroses
Member
I personally don’t believe any of her ‘procedures’ will give her or are giving her any extra time. She is sadly dying and starting the pathway to the end. I’ve seen this happen in the NHS and private. All she is doing is delaying the inevitable ‘ go home and enjoy what you have left’ or ‘ it’s time to go to a hospice’.
her body is failing because it’s shutting down.
I would guess she has about 6-8 weeks left maximum.
Maybe she feels she owes it to whoever to update her account. Who knows. I can’t stand her overconfidence and attitude. She hasn’t a single humble cell in her body but like a car crash I can’t help but watch.
I’m a step Mum to kids who’s Mum died from cancer a few years ago. The biggest regret my husband has is that they didn’t prepare the children for their Mums death. However what they did do was privately enjoy the time they had as a family so leaving them with previous memories. She was treated privately but when they were told they were out of options they bowed out of any more hospital treatment and opted for palliative care. I can’t see BB doing this. She will likely die in that hospital room.
her body is failing because it’s shutting down.
I would guess she has about 6-8 weeks left maximum.
Maybe she feels she owes it to whoever to update her account. Who knows. I can’t stand her overconfidence and attitude. She hasn’t a single humble cell in her body but like a car crash I can’t help but watch.
I’m a step Mum to kids who’s Mum died from cancer a few years ago. The biggest regret my husband has is that they didn’t prepare the children for their Mums death. However what they did do was privately enjoy the time they had as a family so leaving them with previous memories. She was treated privately but when they were told they were out of options they bowed out of any more hospital treatment and opted for palliative care. I can’t see BB doing this. She will likely die in that hospital room.
When I worked in an oncology day unit, in a rural part of the country we'd train district nurses to care for PICC lines so that they could disconnect certain types of chemo for patients in their own home 48 hrs after receiving treatment as a day case, so as to avoid unnecessary long distances to travel to hospital for a procedure which would only take 15-30 mins
However the reality was that often the nurses we'd trained, weren't on duty when certain patients needed to be disconnected and unless they were doing it on a regular basis , they quickly became deskilled which could put both them and their patients in a very dangerous situation ( clots in line, infected lines, sepsis , emboli etc etc)
Often the patients would then turn up at 4pm on a Friday afternoon with infected lines , necessitating removal of line ( meaning another unnecessary, painful procedure to replace line by skilled nurse in an already v busy day unit when they weren't expected + another chest x Ray to check position ), possible IV antibiotics . Then there's the query did they receive the full dose of chemo if line was blocked
I don't know what the answer is....train more nurses?pay us a decent salary for our experience and expertise ....I know I'll be retiring in a couple of yearsafter 37 years in the NHS) along with a large number of my highly skilled cohort ....something is wrong in society when my 22 year old son with abs no experience will be entering a grad scheme with a bank and will be earning more than me as a highly skilled, experienced professional....
the last 2 years have broken the NHS irretrievably I'm afraid ....sorry for rant, but I'm worried for my patientsand as an older person who'll most likely need nursing care myself!
However the reality was that often the nurses we'd trained, weren't on duty when certain patients needed to be disconnected and unless they were doing it on a regular basis , they quickly became deskilled which could put both them and their patients in a very dangerous situation ( clots in line, infected lines, sepsis , emboli etc etc)
Often the patients would then turn up at 4pm on a Friday afternoon with infected lines , necessitating removal of line ( meaning another unnecessary, painful procedure to replace line by skilled nurse in an already v busy day unit when they weren't expected + another chest x Ray to check position ), possible IV antibiotics . Then there's the query did they receive the full dose of chemo if line was blocked
I don't know what the answer is....train more nurses?pay us a decent salary for our experience and expertise ....I know I'll be retiring in a couple of years
the last 2 years have broken the NHS irretrievably I'm afraid ....sorry for rant, but I'm worried for my patients
Freedomofspeech89
VIP Member
BB is so far removed from reality, I can't take anything she says or posts seriously anymore. I'm sorry she's not well and hope she too gets all of the help she needs but she's is just such an insincere person imo.
Bristolgirl
Chatty Member
It’s pretty damn annoying and suspicious that it’s always new posters who jump on with the “Don’t be mean to Deborah.” posts. Like we’re going to suddenly say “Yes, Deborah’s aunt/friend/neighbour you’re so right. She really didn’t use her cancer to get famous before grabbing loads of money for it.” I think they should eff off
And anyone who thinks there isn’t massive disparity between private and NHS care can fuck off into a corner and reflect on their wisdom of voting Tory in the last election. It’s a bit like Loadsa Money Sunak claiming to understand the effect of the rise in energy costs are going to have. His wife is apparently worth £174 million.
And anyone who thinks there isn’t massive disparity between private and NHS care can fuck off into a corner and reflect on their wisdom of voting Tory in the last election. It’s a bit like Loadsa Money Sunak claiming to understand the effect of the rise in energy costs are going to have. His wife is apparently worth £174 million.
Ellyjelly
VIP Member
Don’t get into it, newbies jump onto threads to disrupt because they are either the person being discussed or very close. This is a gossip site! Nobody would wish Deborah ill and we all wish cancer would f**k off, however there is a lot of discussion around her as a person, the vibe she gives off. It’s very sad she’s so ill , but every time I read a paper and shes in it again talking about her latest op I do think why? There are many many people going through the same, on insta yet it’s always Deborah. She knows people in the media that’s why she’s on Lorraine etc. yes it’s highlighted the issues around cancer treatments during Covid, but coming from someone who has private healthcare it feels hypocritical. All the dancing and pouting is bizarre but it’s what she does so
. Do I think she’s very self centred and spoiled? Yes I do, do I wish she’d make a miraculous recovery yes I do! Do I think comments on here about her are fair? Yes!