Notredamn

VIP Member
I know he said she wouldn’t recognise herself but I can’t imagine sitting down to watch the man you’d stalked’s new TV show which is all about how he was stalked and thinking ‘hey so did he have another relentless stalker at the same time I stalked him because I didn’t see her??’
 
  • Like
  • Haha
Reactions: 56

SkiesOfBlue

Chatty Member
I've binge watched the entire thing and I thought it was utterly brilliant. It was hilarious, heartbreaking, painfully sad, touching, clever, complex and memorable. I really commend Gadd in writing and directing something so painful and brave but how he also chose to play himself is beyond me.....it must have been cathartic but also really painful. I can't recommend it enough!
 
  • Like
  • Heart
Reactions: 56

CookieMonsta

VIP Member
I don't understand why there is so much backlash against RG. As the victim why is it his responsibility to protect the identity of his abuser? Why doesn't he have the right to tell his story and to play himself in the show, regardless of his motivations? Is it because she's a woman with MH issues and is seen as vulnerable, in spite of her criminal actions? Or because he's an actor making money and fame off his story that people think this is wrong? I'm a true crime afficionado, as are many other Tattlers. Should true stories like RG's not be told because the perpetrator might be mentally ill or vulnerable? Should Richard Spencer not have participated in the documentary detailing his years of DV at the hands of his abusive wife? Should true crime shows and news reports be cancelled to silence victims and protect murderers, rapists, stalkers from an outraged public? Are people really suggesting that protecting the identity of an abusive stalker should be the priority rather than supporting a victim and allowing them to talk about their ordeal in whatever way works for them? I normally hate this whataboutism but if Martha was a man and RG a woman would people still be criticising him for Baby Reindeer and for not better protecting the identity of his abuser? Would people be blaming him for the actions of the strangers who have tracked down Martha's real identity and are engaging with her?

This discourse questioning his motives and criticising him for not better concealing the identity of his abusive stalker and thus protecting her from the public criticism of her criminal behaviour is Imo victim blaming and shaming. As is blaming him for the irresponsible actions of the strangers who have tracked down her identity and are interacting with her online. RG is the victim here. There are no perfect victims and claiming he should be responsible for protecting his abuser's identity is sick, cruel and a dangerous road to go down for all victims. Martha does seem to have MH issues, but that does not make her exempt from the repercussions of her actions.

MOO
 
  • Like
  • Heart
Reactions: 54

Libbylulu

VIP Member
He'd have concealed her identity better if he'd chosen a different actress and asked her to speak in a different accent. He wanted her to be found.
Agree! I do feel that ‘Darrien’ is getting away lightly though considering the awful SA. If anyone should be outed it should be him. How many others have sadly fallen victim to him.
 
  • Like
  • Heart
Reactions: 53

Tinkerbell cat

VIP Member
I've been stalked and it is horrendous - I don't think I will ever fully get over it and even now, I'm still cautious when I get someone wanting to follow me on social media.

Someone I was friends with and had a brief relationship with but it just didn't work.. and we decided to remain friends.
It started slowly, with a few texts and then texts started that made me uncomfortable, mentioning how nice I looked etc which worried me as they were worded in a way as if he had seen me somewhere even though we didn't live near one another. Then it would be a lot of texts which was overwhelming, then he just started to bombard me with messages all day. I mean one after the other and from early morning until late at night. I just thought to myself this is mental and blocked him.
But then he would just make new accounts, new emails, and buy new sim cards. I thought he would stop, get bored, and move on but he didn't.
When he found out I had a boyfriend by watching social media or getting people to watch it for him, he started a hate campaign against my boyfriend, adding his friends and family, messaging them calling them names, messaging my friends and family, ringing my work.. he was always there, always watching, and just would not leave me alone. He would show up at places he knew I would be - he lived nowhere near me but still showed up at my gym, at my work.. a friend had posted on her Instagram which was public about our upcoming hen party and he worked out when we would be in the airport and showed up there watching me in the airport bar. There is so much more but I would be here all day, and some of the things he would call me and abuse me with still triggers and upsets me
The police didn't seem to really care either because he hadn't harmed me, even though I had albums of close to around 5000 screenshots of messages and fake profiles sending abuse, they just told me to change my number, change my daily routine and maybe remove any social media I had for a while. I just wanted to cry, why was I being made to feel I had to change my life because someone wouldn't leave me alone. He has a new partner now and I haven't heard anything in about 5/6 months but I just know he will still be there somewhere, I feel like stalking me was part of his routine so I don't believe he has just stopped.

The thing is with a stalker - they don't think they are doing anything wrong, they think you owe them the right to talk to them, they don't care if you are scared or at the end of your tether. They will appear normal to everyone around them and then secretly be making your life hell.
You can block and ignore but they can be so relentless that to them they will find anyway possible to contact you. It didn't matter if they got a reply or not, they just wanted you to know they were still there.

I found throughout watching Baby Reindeer so incredibly angry for so many reasons and I struggle to have sympathy for 'Martha'.
 
  • Like
  • Sad
  • Heart
Reactions: 52

veevee04

VIP Member
I'm starting to think Richard Gadd is a bit of prick who's obsessed with fame. He could have changed the script most stalking victims are scared of being murdered and it starting up again. He's obviously not scared of Martha he's choosing to mostly target her not his rapist because she is more vulnerable and has less power. He's fanning the flames for his shot at fame and money.
 
  • Like
  • Heart
Reactions: 51

Serene Serena

VIP Member
He'd have concealed her identity better if he'd chosen a different actress and asked her to speak in a different accent. He wanted her to be found.
 
  • Like
  • Wow
  • Heart
Reactions: 50

justonemorepage

VIP Member
I'm starting to think he's just as unhinged as she is. Why the fuck would you create a show that outs all the people in it, play yourself, especially having to reinact serious SA? I've been SA'd and I had to have therapy to stop my flashbacks so to put myself through reinacting it - for fame and money? No chance in hell. I would also have severe anxiety about other people watching my story play out (although I still hold onto shame so maybe that's just me). I honestly think he needs help as much as she does.

Fuck the guy who SA'd him though. He needs to be in prison.
 
  • Like
  • Heart
Reactions: 49

Boogs

VIP Member
Check date and interesting caption 👀 Don't know why I blacked out her name but still 🥴
I wonder how many people she has accused of stalking her. I’m impressed that his dog is a drug dealer. I need to get mine onto this so she can pay her way as she’s an expensive little sod.
 
  • Haha
  • Like
  • Heart
Reactions: 49