I've been stalked and it is horrendous - I don't think I will ever fully get over it and even now, I'm still cautious when I get someone wanting to follow me on social media.
Someone I was friends with and had a brief relationship with but it just didn't work.. and we decided to remain friends.
It started slowly, with a few texts and then texts started that made me uncomfortable, mentioning how nice I looked etc which worried me as they were worded in a way as if he had seen me somewhere even though we didn't live near one another. Then it would be a lot of texts which was overwhelming, then he just started to bombard me with messages all day. I mean one after the other and from early morning until late at night. I just thought to myself this is mental and blocked him.
But then he would just make new accounts, new emails, and buy new sim cards. I thought he would stop, get bored, and move on but he didn't.
When he found out I had a boyfriend by watching social media or getting people to watch it for him, he started a hate campaign against my boyfriend, adding his friends and family, messaging them calling them names, messaging my friends and family, ringing my work.. he was always there, always watching, and just would not leave me alone. He would show up at places he knew I would be - he lived nowhere near me but still showed up at my gym, at my work.. a friend had posted on her Instagram which was public about our upcoming hen party and he worked out when we would be in the airport and showed up there watching me in the airport bar. There is so much more but I would be here all day, and some of the things he would call me and abuse me with still triggers and upsets me
The police didn't seem to really care either because he hadn't harmed me, even though I had albums of close to around 5000 screenshots of messages and fake profiles sending abuse, they just told me to change my number, change my daily routine and maybe remove any social media I had for a while. I just wanted to cry, why was I being made to feel I had to change my life because someone wouldn't leave me alone. He has a new partner now and I haven't heard anything in about 5/6 months but I just know he will still be there somewhere, I feel like stalking me was part of his routine so I don't believe he has just stopped.
The thing is with a stalker - they don't think they are doing anything wrong, they think you owe them the right to talk to them, they don't care if you are scared or at the end of your tether. They will appear normal to everyone around them and then secretly be making your life hell.
You can block and ignore but they can be so relentless that to them they will find anyway possible to contact you. It didn't matter if they got a reply or not, they just wanted you to know they were still there.
I found throughout watching Baby Reindeer so incredibly angry for so many reasons and I struggle to have sympathy for 'Martha'.