If it is the case that Anna has to run every single house purchase by Mark for his approval, then I can see this breeding resentment further down the line. It seems like he's the one holding the purse strings, even though she's the one earning the money. I don't know if that's how things really are, but that's how she's making it seem, and I know I couldn't live like that. She has said that she hates confrontation, so it's possible she just submits for an easy life.
It's interesting that Lily and Rich seem to have the same sort of dynamic; Lily clearly makes all the decisions in their relationship. I wonder if Mark & Lily, as the dominant personalities, always used to getting their way etc, clash a lot?
I was in an abusive and manipulative relationship and one of the issues was money. I earned more. Luckily we lived apart and never lived together the whole of the relationship, but he’d nitpick what I chose to spend my money on and say I didn’t give + spend enough to/on him. It was a contentious part of the relationship. I had to run all of my purchases by him and get approval or else it’d be painful for me (literally). And he’d often tack items on to my purchases.
I’m now happily married and I still have issues with money. My husband does not care how much I spend or what I spend it on, and I’m the higher earner again. But I still ask him + run it by him even though I know I don’t need to, and he says so. It almost feels pathological now for me to get approval to buy something. It’s absolutely fucked me up and I try really hard to break the pattern.
While I believe there’s no physical abuse with Anna + Mark, the possibility of mental/verbal/psychological abuse could be just as bad. Don’t get my wrong, I’m not accusing either of them of abuse, and I’ve said it before about her victim language w-r-t “he let me” “I had to ask Mark” before that it’s super problematic. And even more so if it’s not true and she’s trying to sound relatable.
Let me tell you Anna, there’s nothing laughable or relatable about living under one’s thumb, whether true or not. And it’s actually quite sickening that you think acting like a victim makes you relatable and (insert comic sans) ~ * QuIrKy ReLaTiOnShIp *~ goals.
She’s a self-professes budgeting guru so work disposable income for each of you each month in to the budget and STFU about what he lets you and doesn’t let you purchase. Unless, of course, that’s ACTUALLY the case.
/rant