You are correct, she is definitely not liked in Spain. When I first moved there, I was interested to learn more about her from people, but they didn't even want to bring her up in conversation. In general, the former Reina Sofía and Felipe are well liked, and Felipe is seen to have steadied the ship, somewhat. JC had a bit of a cultural resurgence in his latter years when he told Hugo Chavez of Venezuela to basically STFU. The next day you could not move for the usual tourist stalls selling scarves and every other kind of memorabilia imaginable with his words "¿Por qué no te callas?" emblazoned on them. He was seen as a bit of a hero for that, one of his last great acts as king.
When Felipe and Letizia visited us privately, he took the time to talk to each and every member of staff. He was really interested in our work (this was not long after the bombings) and made you feel special. I think that is something they must teach to Royals as a lot of them seem to have this capability. Leti I felt sorry for, she seemed painfully thin. She was wearing a dress with 3/4 length sleeves and her hands and wrists were not just slim but skeletal. Anyway, she was only interested in talking to the Ambassador and not us mere mortals. She even rolled her eyes a couple of times as she was being made to wait by Felipe, who was taking his time in talking to us. Very rude, and she left all of us with a poor opinion of her that day. My colleagues attended other events with her in the coming years and said she was no different; aloof, rude to her staff, only interested in talking to important people, unless the cameras are there. Another poster has mentioned the incident in church with her daughters and Reina Sofía. It was most unpleasant and uncalled for and most Spaniards took the side of Sofía. I agree with you about not being afraid to rock the grey hair though, and yes sadly, she is going the same way as Rania of Jordan, facially.
As others have said, the Euro Royals don't seem to be trapped by the gilded cage as much, as have better lives because of it. Sofía was always mooching around El Corte Inglés department store, Felipe was a regular at Joy Eslava nightclub, and you'd stop at the traffic lights and there was JC pulled up next to you on his motorbike. Nobody batted an eyelid, they just got on with it. There is a story about one of HMQ's last state visits to Spain whilst JC was still the King; he wanted to take her to one of his favourite restaurants, but she refused because she had never been to one and didn't see any reason to start going to them
So yes they have a lot more freedom. (Also, she calls him Juanito and he calls her Lilibet).
Anyway I digress