Toddler advice thread

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Definitelyme

I may have missed this, but what age is she? If she is napping until 2pm maybe that time needs changed as she just isn’t finding herself tired enough by bedtime?
 
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Blair-Waldorf

I don’t want to sound annoying as I know you’re desperate and believe me I’ve been there but 7:20am is a good wake up time if she goes to sleep at 8. Mine is 3 years 9 months and doesn’t nap anymore, granted she goes to sleep about 7:30 but is up by 6am for the day no matter what even if we go somewhere like a family party and she’s late going to bed. It was 5:45am today and it’s hard but I’ve just had to accept that this is the way she is, early to bed and early to rise. I’ve got friends with kids similar ages and they go to sleep later and wake later. I was driving myself mad until I just learnt to accept it x
 
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SwizzleMalarkey

I would bring bath to 6pm and do teeth, pyjamas, story time and bed straight after that. We don’t let my son watch the cbeebies bedtime as it seems to excite him!
My son will go to bed at 7pm and be awake for an hour or so chatting to himself and occasionally getting up. We haven’t minded too much as he doesn’t get upset and does drop off eventually. He didn’t nap today though and was asleep by 6:30pm! I’m in denial but I think nap time is on the way out!
 
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al255

Hi all. When did you get rid of the monitor? My 2.5 year old daughter screaming in her sleep is driving me mad. I get broken sleep every night at the moment and I’m finding it hard!! We live in a terrace house and unless I left our doors open at night I wouldn’t hear her. I’ve moved the monitor away from her bed so it’s not directly near it and turning the settings down so it’s not as loud still doesn’t really work. She sleeps through overall but should i just do a night without it in the hope I don’t worry and lie awake all night??
Any advice be grateful xx
 

strawberrysunshine_x

Why is she screaming
 
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Jellybean093

To Be honest, I’ve never really used a montior during night time past about 18 months I sleep with my door shut and theirs slightly open. Mine are all good with sleeping, but if they were to wake up, I’d always hear the tiniest wimper through the walls. I don’t think you ever switch off from being able to hear them
 
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Definitelyme

If there is a chance you won’t hear her and she isn’t able to get up and come for you then keep it. If she is sick during the night, had a nightmare, needs a drink or a million other things, the how would you know to help her if you can’t hear her?
 
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watermelon sugar

I still have a video monitor but I keep it on quiet cos I know I’m a light sleeper and if he woke up I’d be able to hear him. I just like being able to check on the monitor if I woke up through the night. Perhaps just get rid or turn it on quiet? If you think you’d wake up that is
 
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saltandvinegarcrisps

You should keep bedrooms doors fully closed at night for fire safety.

I stopped using a monitor by 18m , still have a camera on an app I can check on him thoughwhen I wanted to
 
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WhatABore

Does she require you to go in when she's still awake or does she stay in bed?

My 4yo had a gro clock.
And once we set it, she knows not to get out of bed.
She's had it since about 2 and a half.

She doesn't go to sleep instantly when we put her in bed. Sometimes she can take an hour.
But I can get on with whatever I'm doing because she'll just chat away to herself or her teddies until she falls asleep.

Can she get up and come in to you if she needs something?
That's when I stopped using one. Once we moved her into a bed and she knew she could come and get us
 
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Jellybean093

saltandvinegarcrisps said:
You should keep bedrooms doors fully closed at night for fire safety.

I stopped using a monitor by 18m , still have a camera on an app I can check on him thoughwhen I wanted to
Click to expand...
Yer, I know, but the door is broken and only opens from the outside. Plus my 6 year old hates the door being closed, even though I’ve told him a million times about it being the safest thing to do
 
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al255

Thanks all - I think I will keep it for now but turn it to the lowest setting. She can’t open her door as I keep it firmly closed but she’s in her own bed too. I think once she can get out of bed and open her door and come into my room that’s when I’ll get rid. She’s screaming atm I think her last 2 molars are coming through, gunna give her calpol tonight before bed. Thanks all xxxx

It’s more like a screaming / crying sound but it’s bloody annoying
 
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WhatABore

Took my 4yo to a stay and play session at her new school this afternoon.
They've got baby chickens.
She walks up to the teacher and says "Can we eat them?"
 
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Definitelyme

WhatABore said:
Took my 4yo to a stay and play session at her new school this afternoon.
They've got baby chickens.
She walks up to the teacher and says "Can we eat them?"
Click to expand...
She is smart! A lot of kids wouldn’t recognise that chicks = the chicken you eat.
Either that or she’s a psycho

We have a stay and play tomorrow for nursery and I am so nervous. My 3yo is so, so shy, she’s only used to family and a select few adults (2!) outside family, and my son had awful separation anxiety at nursery. So basically from now until September I am gonna be worrying non stop about her starting. My son loved his stay and play. Then cried every day at nursery from September ti February
 
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jackieweaver’sauthority

@Definitelyme good luck to you both! Sounds like my little girl but she doesn’t get funding until January next year. I’m due a baby in January so not the best time for her to start preschool. She’s so used to being home with me I’m really worried how she’ll do. Tempted to keep her back until May next year but don’t want to hold her back.
 
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WhatABore

I think that's what Everleigh will end up being like! She won't be starting until she's 2 but I'm already thinking about it

I'm so worried about Ivy starting school though
She's confident but she's also not really been around many kids.
Yeah she's got an older brother but he's so reserved and even since she was a baby, he's always stayed and played in his room.
So they're not close at all.
She's quite naive that she thinks everyone is nice and everyone will be her friend and everyone will want to play with her.
And it worries me
Because she's also verryyyy emotional.

I'm so worried I just want to protect her!
 
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Definitelyme

You will not hold her back if you choose not to send her! Technically I could have sent my 3yo to pre-pre-school last September, but I always think that We have them at home for such a short while that I want to keep them with me as much as I can. She is as bright as a button, so definitely not held back at all. My friends daughter will be in the same class, and she’s been at daycare since age 1, and while her socialisation is “better” than my daughter’s, her speech, understanding, gross motor skills are all “not as good” as my daughter. They all have strengths and weaknesses and unless we keep them in a cave, we aren’t holding them back at all by spending more time with them. People always used to ask me about my older 2 “oh did you not send them before so they could get used to being away from you?” Which I don’t get! They’ll get used to it… just at a later point. Why force it on them young if we don’t have to (and I’m aware that I’m very lucky that we haven’t had to send her for childcare).
Congratulations on your pregnancy

She sounds like a sweetie, so people probably will want to play with her! But I know what you mean about protecting them, it’s so hard to put them in to a situation when we know (or think they may) struggle with some aspects and we won’t be there to help
 
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WhatABore

My 4yo has never been to nursery.
She was due her settling in sessions literally on the day lockdown started.
And when we went to redo her sessions a year or so later, the nursery closed due to Covid. (the manager came in with Covid symptoms and spread it to most staff)
So that kind of put us off sending her.
And then didn't feel like it was worth sending her for less than a year.

So she's not been. And whilst she hasn't really mixed with kids, she's amazing with other kids. It fascinates me.
She's also so good at numbers and writing and stuff already
So you definitley won't hold her back in any way!
 
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jackieweaver’sauthority

Thank you ladies. She is a firecracker and smart as a whip. But she is also very sensitive and shy. She struggles with other people and children. I take her to playgroups and encourage her but can see she will struggle at preschool and I want to be able to support her. I also don’t want her to think she’s having to be sent away because of the baby.
My mum agrees we should wait but my partner is quite keen to get her started there as he thinks it will help her with her social skills.
I do worry she won’t want to make friends, but hoping she’ll meet a child like yours who is super sociable and takes her under her wing. She’s really good with older girls but she’s not quite sure what to make of the younger ones.
 
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Definitelyme

Is there any way she could get to know some kids who would be in her class? Our nursery is part of our school, and linked with our church so I’ve always gone to the mums and tots there (even though I hate them) because there are usually a good few kids who will go to the nursery class. It helps (maybe me, but I assume the kids too!) being able to say "and John will be in your class, so will Jane".
Not that, tbh, it helped my son. His best friend (joined at the hip) was in his nursery class, had known him all his life…still cried daily

I know a lot of people don’t like the label shy, I don’t mind it, but all my kids are very shy, and no amount of being with others did anything to change that tbh.
 
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