Toddler advice thread #5

[al255]

Jeeeeez I’ve just got mini A back.. she got out the car crying and couldn’t walk cos her dad had fastened her shoes too tight, then she’s crying so I’m telling him she’s crying cos her shoes are too tight.. he’s huffing and puffing, giving me tit on the doorstep! Mini A goes inside and doesn’t want to say goodbye to him or his mum cos she can clearly sense daddy is in a bad mood. I ask what’s wrong and he says, “she’s not been listening to me all day” .. I felt like saying I have days like that too!

He’s had her for a full weekend (Friday to Sunday) for the second time this year and they went to the caravan with his mum - he’s hardly done it on his own.

I asked mini A if she had a good time and she said no daddy has been shouting at me 🫠 she was sobbing yesterday morning saying she wanted to come home cos it was boring! Glad she’s home I’ve really missed her this weekend. Thankfully he doesn’t want her for a full weekend often and he wouldn’t of had her for the full weekend as it was his Mum who persuaded him to have her Friday so they could go then! Don’t know why he bothers

 

[PillowsofFluff]

Can you let her have a nap this afternoon just for a hour or so? Is it she’s excited to be at grandmas she doesn’t wanna sleep?

She slept for an hour in the car on the way home, 2-3pm. Still went to bed about half 7 that night, so it was a win

 

[xoxo GG]

We went to next and he picked out his own undies. He’s had two accidents when wearing them this afternoon. Without anything on he is fine will go straight to the potty
Is there anything I can do to help him when he is wearing shorts and underwear?
he has done a on the potty this afternoon as well 🥹
He struggles to get his undies down. I literally haven’t took my eyes off him all day making sure I’m ready for when he’s gonna wee

He’ll get there. I have to say we did avoid underwear for the first few days because we just stayed at home. Once she started wearing underwear I just regularly took her to the toilet, lots of reminders don’t forget your potty is there etc, I feel like all I did for the first few days was ask her if she needed a wee. I did avoid leaving the house if it wasn’t needed and she just wandered round with a tshirt and knickers on so she could get used to pulling knickers up/down, using the potty before she had to tackle waistbands on anything else as well x

 

[strawberrysunshine_x]

He’ll get there. I have to say we did avoid underwear for the first few days because we just stayed at home. Once she started wearing underwear I just regularly took her to the toilet, lots of reminders don’t forget your potty is there etc, I feel like all I did for the first few days was ask her if she needed a wee. I did avoid leaving the house if it wasn’t needed and she just wandered round with a tshirt and knickers on so she could get used to pulling knickers up/down, using the potty before she had to tackle waistbands on anything else as well x

Thankyou I feel like this is most of what we’ve done. If it wasn’t Father’s Day we would have stayed in.he’s done two on the potty this afternoon
I am feeling a bit nervous about him going to nursery tomorrow as I feel he’s not ready to tackle shorts and undies properly I’ve emailed the teacher explaining
I’ve asked him loads if he need a wee & same as you reminded him where the potty is if he needs.

 

[Kit123]

Mine is off with her dad til next week. He said that she went for a wee on the plane and held it while she was waiting. Feel so proud of her for picking it up on her own. Was dreading it tbh but kinda seems like she's just doing it! Definitely gonna try pants when she gets back. Not sure about nursery yet though!

 

[strawberrysunshine_x]

Mine is off with her dad til next week. He said that she went for a wee on the plane and held it while she was waiting. Feel so proud of her for picking it up on her own. Was dreading it tbh but kinda seems like she's just doing it! Definitely gonna try pants when she gets back. Not sure about nursery yet though!

Well my nursery have replied to my email and she has said if he has a morning of accidents they’ll put a nappy on him
Is this good advice?!

 

[Kit123]

Well my nursery have replied to my email and she has said if he has a morning of accidents they’ll put a nappy on him
Is this good advice?!

I'm not sure tbh, mine is off nursery ATM as she is on holiday. I suppose if he keeps having accidents they will think he's not ready? It's so confusing isn't it

 

[jackieweaver’sauthority]

Well my nursery have replied to my email and she has said if he has a morning of accidents they’ll put a nappy on him
Is this good advice?!

My daughter has had a few accidents at preschool and never been put in a nappy. She did potty train before starting but only by two months. Is that their policy? It seems a bit unsupportive.

 

[Definitelyme]

Well my nursery have replied to my email and she has said if he has a morning of accidents they’ll put a nappy on him
Is this good advice?!

It depends what “a whole morning” means. 1 or 2 accidents, or all accidents. I wouldn’t be happy with it though.

 

[strawberrysunshine_x]

It depends what “a whole morning” means. 1 or 2 accidents, or all accidents. I wouldn’t be happy with it though.

No I’m not to be honest. Feel like it’s a bit lazy??? Think she probably means each wee is an accident??
feel like it would be a step back for him. He’s done so well at home today
---

My daughter has had a few accidents at preschool and never been put in a nappy. She did potty train before starting but only by two months. Is that their policy? It seems a bit unsupportive.

I mean I would expect him to have accidents there cos he’ll be distracted and they can’t watch him like I can.
I kind of expected it to be honest from them

 

[jackieweaver’sauthority]

He will definitely have accidents there. It’s totally normal, like you say he’ll be distracted. Does he have access to a toilet he can take himself to? My daughter has to ask and that was a big hurdle for her but she has always been timid.

 

[strawberrysunshine_x]

He will definitely have accidents there. It’s totally normal, like you say he’ll be distracted. Does he have access to a toilet he can take himself to? My daughter has to ask and that was a big hurdle for her but she has always been timid.

Yeah they have a few cubicles and they also have a potty as well. When I go in in the morning I am planning on showing him
God I’m really nervous for it!! Just want him to be ok. He still needs a bit of help with his shorts still at the min just to get them right down

 

[jackieweaver’sauthority]

Yeah they have a few cubicles and they also have a potty as well. When I go in in the morning I am planning on showing him
God I’m really nervous for it!! Just want him to be ok. He still needs a bit of help with his shorts still at the min just to get them right down

Oh perfect that’s a much better set up. He’ll be fine. Can you email and say you don’t want him put in nappies. Accidents are par for the course, he will be fine!

 

[strawberrysunshine_x]

Oh perfect that’s a much better set up. He’ll be fine. Can you email and say you don’t want him put in nappies. Accidents are par for the course, he will be fine!

I can tell her in the morning🩷

 

[strawberrysunshine_x]

He had an accident when we’d just got ready. I held off getting him dressed and kept asking if he needed a wee. He tried a few times and then nothing but when we got to the car he’d done a wee
I’m nervous for how today is going to go for him he was upset as well to be there today cos we’ve hadthe weekend together
One of the teachers said she doesn’t think we should put the nappies back on if he has accidents. It was the one in charge who said to over email
Hope he’s going to be ok

 

[CherryBakewell]

Hi everyone! Looking for a wee bit of potty training advice please. My son is three this week and has shown all the signs of being ready to potty train and (by sheer luck) he’s pooped in the potty. He now says he’s scared of the potty and refuses to go near it. I’ve got him two different ones and he won’t go near either. He’s currently screaming because I put him on the potty mid pee.I just don’t know what to do here. Has anyone had this experience before?

 

[AllTheBest2022]

Hi everyone! Looking for a wee bit of potty training advice please. My son is three this week and has shown all the signs of being ready to potty train and (by sheer luck) he’s pooped in the potty. He now says he’s scared of the potty and refuses to go near it. I’ve got him two different ones and he won’t go near either. He’s currently screaming because I put him on the potty mid pee.I just don’t know what to do here. Has anyone had this experience before?

My son started out with hating the potty and the toilet. Wouldn't even look at them without freaking out. I just left a potty in the lounge and me and his dad kept pretending to use it a few times a day to show him it isn't scary. He then began putting his teddies on the potty and now is a week into potty training doing both a wee and a poo on the potty. I found it easier by not making a big deal out of it, the more I encouraged him the more it pushed him away if that makes sense? Just think of it as a new piece of furniture lol.

Just to add - did he see the poo in the potty and is that when the screaming started?

 

[strawberrysunshine_x]

Hi everyone! Looking for a wee bit of potty training advice please. My son is three this week and has shown all the signs of being ready to potty train and (by sheer luck) he’s pooped in the potty. He now says he’s scared of the potty and refuses to go near it. I’ve got him two different ones and he won’t go near either. He’s currently screaming because I put him on the potty mid pee.I just don’t know what to do here. Has anyone had this experience before?

Hi , mine didn’t like the potty a few months ago or would cry with underpants on
This weekend was the first time he wanted to use the potty. I just left it out and let him decide when he wanted ( I know this approach isn’t for everyone). But it was less stressful for him

 

[CherryBakewell]

My son started out with hating the potty and the toilet. Wouldn't even look at them without freaking out. I just left a potty in the lounge and me and his dad kept pretending to use it a few times a day to show him it isn't scary. He then began putting his teddies on the potty and now is a week into potty training doing both a wee and a poo on the potty. I found it easier by not making a big deal out of it, the more I encouraged him the more it pushed him away if that makes sense? Just think of it as a new piece of furniture lol.

Just to add - did he see the poo in the potty and is that when the screaming started?

We’ve had a potty sat in the living room for about a year so it’s definitely another piece of furniture now my husband and I have both pretended to use it, tmi but I even did pee in it to show him it’s not scary
Yeah he seen the poo and was so chuffed, we made a huge deal of it and gave him lots of praise and he was so happy to tell him grandparents and cousins about it they all cheered for him too and he was buzzing
---

Hi , mine didn’t like the potty a few months ago or would cry with underpants on
This weekend was the first time he wanted to use the potty. I just left it out and let him decide when he wanted ( I know this approach isn’t for everyone). But it was less stressful for him

He’s been the same, crying with pants on saying he’s scared of them and he wants his nappies but he’s happily put pants on now so I guess that’s progress. He’s away to start nursery 5 days a week as of August and I just want to have it done by then. I have a feeling I’m causing myself more stress though.

 

[AllTheBest2022]

We’ve had a potty sat in the living room for about a year so it’s definitely another piece of furniture now my husband and I have both pretended to use it, tmi but I even did pee in it to show him it’s not scary
Yeah he seen the poo and was so chuffed, we made a huge deal of it and gave him lots of praise and he was so happy to tell him grandparents and cousins about it they all cheered for him too and he was buzzing
---

He’s been the same, crying with pants on saying he’s scared of them and he wants his nappies but he’s happily put pants on now so I guess that’s progress. He’s away to start nursery 5 days a week as of August and I just want to have it done by then. I have a feeling I’m causing myself more stress though.

I'd personally stop for a while and then try again at a later date, my son was 3 in March and is only now ready. If it's causing you both stress/upset then stop, it won't help either of you right now x