Toddler Advice Thread #2

teddy19 · Jul 13, 2022

My little boy (3 in January) is going to a nursery friends birthday party on the weekend

I’ve never met this little girl or her mum as I just don’t think you really mix with their parents at this age??

What do you guys get in terms of presents for nursery friends? The past 2 parties hes been to ive just got a nice card and put £5 in. Do we think this is reasonable?

Obviously I don’t know the child to know her interests or even what her parents would be happy her receiving Just don’t want to seem tight!

ChattyMammy · Jul 13, 2022

teddy19 said:
My little boy (3 in January) is going to a nursery friends birthday party on the weekend

I’ve never met this little girl or her mum as I just don’t think you really mix with their parents at this age??

What do you guys get in terms of presents for nursery friends? The past 2 parties hes been to ive just got a nice card and put £5 in. Do we think this is reasonable?

Obviously I don’t know the child to know her interests or even what her parents would be happy her receiving Just don’t want to seem tight!

I always ask practitioners at nurseries what they’re into for ideas, I’ve never given cash but all the parties I’ve been to are for 2 year olds so obviously no concept of what money is at that age, I don’t think you can ever go wrong with even just a couple of age appropriate books wrapped up for kids of nursery age

Kim Mild · Jul 13, 2022

teddy19 said:
My little boy (3 in January) is going to a nursery friends birthday party on the weekend

I’ve never met this little girl or her mum as I just don’t think you really mix with their parents at this age??

What do you guys get in terms of presents for nursery friends? The past 2 parties hes been to ive just got a nice card and put £5 in. Do we think this is reasonable?

Obviously I don’t know the child to know her interests or even what her parents would be happy her receiving Just don’t want to seem tight!

I'd put cash in a card , probably a fiver but maybea tenner if it was a good friend. I think I'd rather receive money if it was us having the party, and they can always put it in a savings account

watermelon sugar · Jul 13, 2022

I think money in a card is a good idea - we have a savings account for our little boy so any money we receive just goes in there

PillowsofFluff · Jul 13, 2022

Me again.
So little miss slept fine last night, a bit restless but didn't wake or cry and her temp was normal when she went to bed.
Got her up this morning and she was roasting to touch but her room was reading 26 degrees even with the fan on, and her ear temp was normal so I didn't think too much of it.
Anyway, she's been completely off colour all morning, just laying on the sofa, drifting in and out of sleep since about 10.30am. Drank her milk at 7am but not touched a drop of fluid since, no matter what I offer her. Refuses Calpol and I'm not sure if I want to pin her down and force her! She's extremely hot to touch, almost like a radiator but her skin is goosepimply at times? In ear temp varies from 38.4 to 39.4 but as she's sleeping on her side it's hard to tell if its accurate.
I know people will tell me to get off Tattle and get medical advice but I can't get through to 111 or my doctors. We've been to A&E 3 times already this year for temperatures so I feel like I'll just get laughed at again and told it's just a bug, let it run its course. Hubby is at work and can't leave. Feel like a shit mum because this literally happens every few weeks

WhatABore · Jul 13, 2022

PillowsofFluff said:
Me again.
So little miss slept fine last night, a bit restless but didn't wake or cry and her temp was normal when she went to bed.
Got her up this morning and she was roasting to touch but her room was reading 26 degrees even with the fan on, and her ear temp was normal so I didn't think too much of it.
Anyway, she's been completely off colour all morning, just laying on the sofa, drifting in and out of sleep since about 10.30am. Drank her milk at 7am but not touched a drop of fluid since, no matter what I offer her. Refuses Calpol and I'm not sure if I want to pin her down and force her! She's extremely hot to touch, almost like a radiator but her skin is goosepimply at times? In ear temp varies from 38.4 to 39.4 but as she's sleeping on her side it's hard to tell if its accurate.
I know people will tell me to get off Tattle and get medical advice but I can't get through to 111 or my doctors. We've been to A&E 3 times already this year for temperatures so I feel like I'll just get laughed at again and told it's just a bug, let it run its course. Hubby is at work and can't leave. Feel like a shit mum because this literally happens every few weeks

I would say to keep trying 111. Especially with a temp that high.

my 4yo had a temperature for the past 3 days now at 38.5. She was literally radiating heat.

If you can get some calpol into her, it should bring her temperature down a little bit.
As she's really sleepy though, I'd definitely keep trying 111. If you can't get through then I would maybe go to AandE .

I cant remember how old she is?
Is she old enough to ask if she's in pain or anything?

jackieweaver’sauthority · Jul 13, 2022

PillowsofFluff said:
Me again.
So little miss slept fine last night, a bit restless but didn't wake or cry and her temp was normal when she went to bed.
Got her up this morning and she was roasting to touch but her room was reading 26 degrees even with the fan on, and her ear temp was normal so I didn't think too much of it.
Anyway, she's been completely off colour all morning, just laying on the sofa, drifting in and out of sleep since about 10.30am. Drank her milk at 7am but not touched a drop of fluid since, no matter what I offer her. Refuses Calpol and I'm not sure if I want to pin her down and force her! She's extremely hot to touch, almost like a radiator but her skin is goosepimply at times? In ear temp varies from 38.4 to 39.4 but as she's sleeping on her side it's hard to tell if its accurate.
I know people will tell me to get off Tattle and get medical advice but I can't get through to 111 or my doctors. We've been to A&E 3 times already this year for temperatures so I feel like I'll just get laughed at again and told it's just a bug, let it run its course. Hubby is at work and can't leave. Feel like a shit mum because this literally happens every few weeks

Keep trying 111 as she’s not eating or drinking. I would try and get calpol in her, to see if she can then get some fluids or food in. Last week my daughter had a high temperature for 5 days but we were able to manage it with calpol and keeping up with fluids as much food as she could manage and lots of rest. I feel like you, there’s so much going about it just feels constant, but it’s no reflection on you as a parent!

BlueRose · Jul 13, 2022

PillowsofFluff said:
Me again.
So little miss slept fine last night, a bit restless but didn't wake or cry and her temp was normal when she went to bed.
Got her up this morning and she was roasting to touch but her room was reading 26 degrees even with the fan on, and her ear temp was normal so I didn't think too much of it.
Anyway, she's been completely off colour all morning, just laying on the sofa, drifting in and out of sleep since about 10.30am. Drank her milk at 7am but not touched a drop of fluid since, no matter what I offer her. Refuses Calpol and I'm not sure if I want to pin her down and force her! She's extremely hot to touch, almost like a radiator but her skin is goosepimply at times? In ear temp varies from 38.4 to 39.4 but as she's sleeping on her side it's hard to tell if its accurate.
I know people will tell me to get off Tattle and get medical advice but I can't get through to 111 or my doctors. We've been to A&E 3 times already this year for temperatures so I feel like I'll just get laughed at again and told it's just a bug, let it run its course. Hubby is at work and can't leave. Feel like a shit mum because this literally happens every few weeks

Can you strip her down, open window close curtians or blinds. Dap water onto her lips.

strawberrysunshine_x · Jul 13, 2022

Some might remember I had issues with McDonald’s. My Mil has taken my son yesterday AND today !! And he’s just gone a big green diarrhoea ! I’m half tempted to send her a fucking picture of it

PillowsofFluff said:
Me again.
So little miss slept fine last night, a bit restless but didn't wake or cry and her temp was normal when she went to bed.
Got her up this morning and she was roasting to touch but her room was reading 26 degrees even with the fan on, and her ear temp was normal so I didn't think too much of it.
Anyway, she's been completely off colour all morning, just laying on the sofa, drifting in and out of sleep since about 10.30am. Drank her milk at 7am but not touched a drop of fluid since, no matter what I offer her. Refuses Calpol and I'm not sure if I want to pin her down and force her! She's extremely hot to touch, almost like a radiator but her skin is goosepimply at times? In ear temp varies from 38.4 to 39.4 but as she's sleeping on her side it's hard to tell if its accurate.
I know people will tell me to get off Tattle and get medical advice but I can't get through to 111 or my doctors. We've been to A&E 3 times already this year for temperatures so I feel like I'll just get laughed at again and told it's just a bug, let it run its course. Hubby is at work and can't leave. Feel like a shit mum because this literally happens every few weeks

100% get calpol down her even if you have to pin her down!!!!

teddy19 · Jul 13, 2022

strawberrysunshine_x said:
Some might remember I had issues with McDonald’s. My Mil has taken my son yesterday AND today !! And he’s just gone a big green diarrhoea ! I’m half tempted to send her a fucking picture of it

100% get calpol down her even if you have to pin her down!!!!

That is too far isnt it what does he get when he goes and how old is he?

Is your MIL just lazy or is she partial to a maccies?!

strawberrysunshine_x · Jul 13, 2022

teddy19 said:
That is too far isnt it what does he get when he goes and how old is he?

Is your MIL just lazy or is she partial to a maccies?!

She’s ducking lazy ! I don’t even think she has anything. She gets him fish finger happy meal and sometimes will get Fruit shoot or a milkshake ! He’s 3. If I say anything to her she goes absolutely mental that she will cut me off , she doesn’t need me , she won’t help me etc.
it stresses me out so much cos it’s obviously not good for him if he’s having diarrhoea. My OH won’t say anything to her either.
she told me he’d had it when I went to pick him up and I went oh again! Dead blunt and she said he won’t eat anything else which is a blatant lie x

teddy19 · Jul 13, 2022

strawberrysunshine_x said:
She’s ducking lazy ! I don’t even think she has anything. She gets him fish finger happy meal and sometimes will get Fruit shoot or a milkshake ! He’s 3. If I say anything to her she goes absolutely mental that she will cut me off , she doesn’t need me , she won’t help me etc.
it stresses me out so much cos it’s obviously not good for him if he’s having diarrhoea. My OH won’t say anything to her either.
she told me he’d had it when I went to pick him up and I went oh again! Dead blunt and she said he won’t eat anything else which is a blatant lie x

I’d go on at your other half to tell her! If it was my mum doing something I didnt agree with i’d tell her. If it was my husbands mum, id make him tell her! We’ve always had that agreement when it comes to our kids otherwise it gets awkward.

Can you send him with a pre made meal instead or a packed lunch? And just say your trying to cut his salt intake down or something like that! You don’t mind it as a treat but when it becomes a few times a week it takes the excitement/treat element out of getting one!

strawberrysunshine_x · Jul 13, 2022

teddy19 said:
I’d go on at your other half to tell her! If it was my mum doing something I didnt agree with i’d tell her. If it was my husbands mum, id make him tell her! We’ve always had that agreement when it comes to our kids otherwise it gets awkward.

Can you send him with a pre made meal instead or a packed lunch? And just say your trying to cut his salt intake down or something like that! You don’t mind it as a treat but when it becomes a few times a week it takes the excitement/treat element out of getting one!

I’ve tried. My partner took him lunch today and she said he didn’t eat it .
I text her asking if he had diarrhoea today and she said no been fine and I said well he has it now and she said maybe it’s Covid.

I’m going to have to have a serious word and I’m gonna call her bluff. If she wants to cut me off fine do it

teddy19 · Jul 13, 2022

strawberrysunshine_x said:
I’ve tried. My partner took him lunch today and she said he didn’t eat it .
I text her asking if he had diarrhoea today and she said no been fine and I said well he has it now and she said maybe it’s Covid.
I’m going to have to have a serious word and I’m gonna call her bluff. If she wants to cut me off fine do it

blaming covid rather than admitting shes overfeeding him Mcds! she sounds like a nightmare MIL!

strawberrysunshine_x · Jul 13, 2022

teddy19 said:
blaming covid rather than admitting shes overfeeding him Mcds! she sounds like a nightmare MIL!

She friggin is !!!!l she’s now claiming he didn’t eat FF and only had chips but I’m pretty certain before she said he ate it . I can’t be doing with her tbh I HATE him going to her house

these are the types of things she does. I have 3 sis in laws.
1 asks her not to give her daughter strawberries with sugar. Four finger kitkats and hot dogs. When her dadcame to pick her up once she was eating Kit Kat and she shoved her in the garden and said quick eat that before your dad sees.
she actually has a problem
My 2nd sis in law asked her not to give their kids certain things and she does.

Wophie · Jul 13, 2022

Evening all, I've come to join in the toddler mayhem after this thread being suggested on the pregnancy thread.

I'm 33 weeks pregnant with a toddler who is 2Y 9M. I'd say over the past 1-2 weeks I've been really struggling with her and can't put my finger on exactly what is making her act up. She's sleeping less than usual - she'd normally do about 7pm - 6:30am with no nap, but yesterday she graced us with 4:15am. If she goes down for a nap she won't settle in bed until sometimes almost 10pm. She's been on and off naps for a while so I'm fine with no nap... she however is the devil incarnate if she's doesn't nap. It's like she has my pregnancy hormones and will cry at the drop of a hat. She was asking me what we have in the freezer earlier and when I said we had no crumpets it was full bawling waterworks

She's also just not touching her food other than breakfast and having minimal snacks. I'm lucky if I get a bite of sandwich and a few pieces of cucumber in her at lunch, then she asks for dinner at about 5pm, I make it and she barely touches that too, even if it's exactly what she asked for.

She came down with a cold end of last week and obviously the weather at the moment is making everyone grouchy. But I'm starting to worry exactly what it is she's running off if she's not sleeping well or eating well.

Icing on the cake is I suggested to my husband that she starts having her afternoon nap consistently again (it's been as and when I think she's needs it at the moment) and maybe goes to bed an hour later so she can eat dinner when it's a bit cooler. He moaned that he will get less of and evening to himself fucking priorities man

jackieweaver’sauthority · Jul 13, 2022

@Wophie my daughter is the same age as you and although I’m only 13 weeks my daughter is the same as yours. I think they defo have a sixth sense of pregnancy and all the changes that happen to us physically have more of an effect on them than we realise.
You probably have a bump now but it’s still such an abstract idea that a baby will be here soon, and toddlers aren’t capable of abstract thought. So all these changes are happening but they can’t really grasp why. That’s my hot take on it anyway It’s all a phase with toddlers but my god it’s hard work!

My daughter isn’t the best eater, she eats little but often. She was sick last week with a stomach bug and barely ate anything but was still full of energy. Really don’t know where they get it from! If you’re worried you could try smaller meals throughout the day, and in the heat maybe fruit salad and yoghurt for dinner?

If you think her napping again is going to be better for her and for you then go for it. My partner is the same, he can come across as really unempathetic. Sometimes I think they can’t fathom a new baby until it’s here either, even though they’ve already done it. So we’re basically working against two toddlers

strawberrysunshine_x · Jul 14, 2022

jackieweaver’sauthority said:
@Wophie my daughter is the same age as you and although I’m only 13 weeks my daughter is the same as yours. I think they defo have a sixth sense of pregnancy and all the changes that happen to us physically have more of an effect on them than we realise.
You probably have a bump now but it’s still such an abstract idea that a baby will be here soon, and toddlers aren’t capable of abstract thought. So all these changes are happening but they can’t really grasp why. That’s my hot take on it anyway It’s all a phase with toddlers but my god it’s hard work!

My daughter isn’t the best eater, she eats little but often. She was sick last week with a stomach bug and barely ate anything but was still full of energy. Really don’t know where they get it from! If you’re worried you could try smaller meals throughout the day, and in the heat maybe fruit salad and yoghurt for dinner?

If you think her napping again is going to be better for her and for you then go for it. My partner is the same, he can come across as really unempathetic. Sometimes I think they can’t fathom a new baby until it’s here either, even though they’ve already done it. So we’re basically working against two toddlers

I agree with this. Have you mentioned she’s gonna Have a brother or sister. She might be acting out

also agree on the small meals. Has she always been like this or just recently. Could be the weather. When it’s hot I don’t feel like eating. I agree on little and often. What about a picnic tea or something she can get involved in

Jellybean093 · Jul 14, 2022

Wophie said:
Evening all, I've come to join in the toddler mayhem after this thread being suggested on the pregnancy thread.

I'm 33 weeks pregnant with a toddler who is 2Y 9M. I'd say over the past 1-2 weeks I've been really struggling with her and can't put my finger on exactly what is making her act up. She's sleeping less than usual - she'd normally do about 7pm - 6:30am with no nap, but yesterday she graced us with 4:15am. If she goes down for a nap she won't settle in bed until sometimes almost 10pm. She's been on and off naps for a while so I'm fine with no nap... she however is the devil incarnate if she's doesn't nap. It's like she has my pregnancy hormones and will cry at the drop of a hat. She was asking me what we have in the freezer earlier and when I said we had no crumpets it was full bawling waterworks

She's also just not touching her food other than breakfast and having minimal snacks. I'm lucky if I get a bite of sandwich and a few pieces of cucumber in her at lunch, then she asks for dinner at about 5pm, I make it and she barely touches that too, even if it's exactly what she asked for.

She came down with a cold end of last week and obviously the weather at the moment is making everyone grouchy. But I'm starting to worry exactly what it is she's running off if she's not sleeping well or eating well.

Icing on the cake is I suggested to my husband that she starts having her afternoon nap consistently again (it's been as and when I think she's needs it at the moment) and maybe goes to bed an hour later so she can eat dinner when it's a bit cooler. He moaned that he will get less of and evening to himself fucking priorities man

We are also going through the ‘needs a nap but doesn’t go to bed phase’ about 3 o’clock, he’s just awful. He also isn’t going to sleep until really late because he doesn’t have a dummy or bed time milk anymore and he messes around. He’s also not a great eater. Breakfast is his go to meal. Actually, yesterday, when he got home from preschool, he had weetabix for lunch and cereal for dinner. To be honest, I took that as it was easier than fighting with him!

watermelon sugar · Jul 14, 2022

My toddler could eat Cheerios for breakfast, lunch and dinner everyday if he could. When I ask him what he wants to eat he’s just like ‘CEREAL’ And legs it to the Cheerios

Toddler Advice Thread #2

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