Congrats to @Mopsy75 for the thread title.
Previously, on the Real White Trash of Lake Nona:
Our favourite grifters attended the opening of Epcot's Flower and Garden Festival sans-offspring for an orgy of overindulgence, wherein Jenn treated herself to stuffed toys which will be added to the Ft. Pampers rubbish heap, and a garish granny-quilt dress which was so relentlessly mocked by Tattlers that it was quietly returned a few videos later. Tim also sports a large herpes blister he picked up from Facetiming Ye Olde Secret Tunnel
On the homeslog front: the bottom of the barrel was officially scraped as the Trackholes filmed the inside of their kitchen cabinets in a desperate bid to provide content for their stupified stans. Jenn also flexed her Sephora haul of overpriced skincare products, which gives new meaning to the idiom "pearls before swine".
A Tim x Adam The Woo "co-lab" celebrating Earth Day at Disney AK set a new world record for repetition of the phrase "opening day attraction". Dim rides Kali River Rapids by himself, as ATW dodges any possibility of being degreased, and shamelessly films himself (which he erroneously called a "POV") annoying the other riders with his asinine narration.
A visit to Typhon Lagoon with "the cousins" provides ample opportunity to flex in a mid-tier cabana and to stuff their rapidly-aging faces with overpriced theme park fare. Jenn pulls a Karen and forces the staff to bring in an extended chaise lounge from the most expensive cabana as her child refuses to sleep on furniture meant for commoners.
Tim continues his parasitic relationship with Busch Gardens, this time hosted for a HARD HAT TORE of a boring new coaster, which Tim phones in by constantly repeating how "exciting" it is in a monotone murmur. He also brags about Buddy's height, as this is the only metric by which Tim can be proud of his troubled offspring.
The Trashholes come alive for a truly monumental occasion: trying a new burger offering at Disney Spring without the kids. Tim and Jenn leak, gush, and squirt all over themselves as they consume the high-calorie stack of grease. While they openly profess to be sharing a single burger, a slip of the camera reveals that Tim had a full burger of his very own. More low-quality lies from low-intelligence grifters.
Finally, a return visit to 1900 Park Fare, this time for dinner, takes a sombre turn as Buddy openly displays signs of erratic and troubling behaviour during the character interactions. Tim and his hog of a wife are oblivious to the trainwreck unfolding in front of them, opting instead to gorge themselves on every item on the buffet, and trot out fifth-grade level vocabulary to describe it between desperate gulps of high-calorie slop. The video ends with a low-key flex that they valet parked - due of course to their piss-poor time management.
All in all, it was a predictable week of steady decline and arrested development. With that being said, we're off, we'll see you all tomorrow, and now it's time for society to pay the price.
Previously, on the Real White Trash of Lake Nona:
Our favourite grifters attended the opening of Epcot's Flower and Garden Festival sans-offspring for an orgy of overindulgence, wherein Jenn treated herself to stuffed toys which will be added to the Ft. Pampers rubbish heap, and a garish granny-quilt dress which was so relentlessly mocked by Tattlers that it was quietly returned a few videos later. Tim also sports a large herpes blister he picked up from Facetiming Ye Olde Secret Tunnel
On the homeslog front: the bottom of the barrel was officially scraped as the Trackholes filmed the inside of their kitchen cabinets in a desperate bid to provide content for their stupified stans. Jenn also flexed her Sephora haul of overpriced skincare products, which gives new meaning to the idiom "pearls before swine".
A Tim x Adam The Woo "co-lab" celebrating Earth Day at Disney AK set a new world record for repetition of the phrase "opening day attraction". Dim rides Kali River Rapids by himself, as ATW dodges any possibility of being degreased, and shamelessly films himself (which he erroneously called a "POV") annoying the other riders with his asinine narration.
A visit to Typhon Lagoon with "the cousins" provides ample opportunity to flex in a mid-tier cabana and to stuff their rapidly-aging faces with overpriced theme park fare. Jenn pulls a Karen and forces the staff to bring in an extended chaise lounge from the most expensive cabana as her child refuses to sleep on furniture meant for commoners.
Tim continues his parasitic relationship with Busch Gardens, this time hosted for a HARD HAT TORE of a boring new coaster, which Tim phones in by constantly repeating how "exciting" it is in a monotone murmur. He also brags about Buddy's height, as this is the only metric by which Tim can be proud of his troubled offspring.
The Trashholes come alive for a truly monumental occasion: trying a new burger offering at Disney Spring without the kids. Tim and Jenn leak, gush, and squirt all over themselves as they consume the high-calorie stack of grease. While they openly profess to be sharing a single burger, a slip of the camera reveals that Tim had a full burger of his very own. More low-quality lies from low-intelligence grifters.
Finally, a return visit to 1900 Park Fare, this time for dinner, takes a sombre turn as Buddy openly displays signs of erratic and troubling behaviour during the character interactions. Tim and his hog of a wife are oblivious to the trainwreck unfolding in front of them, opting instead to gorge themselves on every item on the buffet, and trot out fifth-grade level vocabulary to describe it between desperate gulps of high-calorie slop. The video ends with a low-key flex that they valet parked - due of course to their piss-poor time management.
All in all, it was a predictable week of steady decline and arrested development. With that being said, we're off, we'll see you all tomorrow, and now it's time for society to pay the price.
