Did they stay together?It was the other man, in my family. Then aged seventeen, I was introduced to him as a workmate of my mum's. I liked him.
Soon, it became clear he and my mother were having an affair. I lost respect for all three in the triangle, including my dad for just letting it go on when it was so obvious. Mum left my dad for the other man when I was nearly twenty.
More than thirty years on, I've still not fully come to terms with it all.
That would depend on what you wanted from the relationship. For me, nope, not at all, my focus was on other things, so it was just great sex with none of the drama. Also I didn't feel guilt at all. A person isn't a possession, they have freewill, if someone wants to cheat on their partner, that's entirely on them and as for female solidarity, nope don't get that either, soz#notsoz. All my closest friends have been Male (platonic, I never sleep with my male friends) I feel far more affinity with men than women.Random question to all those who've been the other woman, no judgement just curious....does being the other woman not feel like being cheated on in itself? Like you're sleeping with him but he's also sleeping with someone else?
Personally I think I block it out. It hurts to think, hurts to let go and hurts to stay.Random question to all those who've been the other woman, no judgement just curious....does being the other woman not feel like being cheated on in itself? Like you're sleeping with him but he's also sleeping with someone else?
You need to put yourself first, you shouldnt be anyones side piece xPersonally I think I block it out. It hurts to think, hurts to let go and hurts to stay.. Been reading this thread for a while, need to find the courage to leave but I just can’t.. I don’t know my life without him, but I’m losing myself.
Yes. Mum"s still with the other man.Did they stay together?
I always believe that those people who cheat, even once, will have the desire to cheat again. They will know the thrill of being the cheater and no matter how many promises they make to stop doing it, the urge would be too strong for some.Random question to all those who've been the other woman, no judgement just curious....does being the other woman not feel like being cheated on in itself? Like you're sleeping with him but he's also sleeping with someone else?
I think anything when the other person is in a relationship would, regardless of length.I don't suppose a tacky fling that lasted a few months, counts as being tthe "other woman" does it?
What then do you call someone who actively sets out to destroy a marriage in the full knowledge there is a new baby and a toddler involved in the mess, someone who thinks they can step right into your shoes before you have even left them? I endured that along with all the lies that he thought I'd never notice because I was too busy with two little kids to worry what he was up to with the sneaking off for sudden "appointments" he absolutely had to attend on pain-of-death, the "Golf games" and all the other lame excuses. Yes all his lies and all this because she decided she wanted my husband for herself! Well when he came to his senses after a couple of months of stringing her along between me and our little children I DECIDED -not him - that I was not going to play second fiddle to someone as inherently ugly and untrustworthy as her and that basically he could have her and get on with it! I chucked him out and he scuttled off back to his horrible mother.I’m a member, not just a moderator.
also, nobody knows if I’ve been the wife, the partner, the child of a cheating father, so if I want to say a woman who knowingly enters into a relationship with a father and husband is trash, I’ll say it.
It’s a shit thing to do, shit. Especially if kids are involved.
If people can give sympathy and console I’m gonna do similar for the victims of the situation.
I wish YOU nothing but good karma and a good relationship from now on, with yourself and whoever you allow into your life, anything must be better than trash,What then do you call someone who actively sets out to destroy a marriage in the full knowledge there is a new baby and a toddler involved in the mess, someone who thinks they can step right into your shoes before you have even left them? I endured that along with all the lies that he thought I'd never notice because I was too busy with two little kids to worry what he was up to with the sneaking off for sudden "appointments" he absolutely had to attend on pain-of-death, the "Golf games" and all the other lame excuses. Yes all his lies and all this because she decided she wanted my husband for herself! Well when he came to his senses after a couple of months of stringing her along between me and our little children I DECIDED -not him - that I was not going to play second fiddle to someone as inherently ugly and untrustworthy as her and that basically he could have her and get on with it! I chucked him out and he scuttled off back to his horrible mother.
He went on to marry her eventually and the kids say he's miserable as sin whenever they speak to him, plus she has health problems which effectively mean he's her carer now and gets to wheel her about in a wheelchair whilst she screeches abuse at him for not doing anything right!!. Karma has some funny ways of getting payback dealt with
Karma comes to those that deserve a reminder of what they've done. I remarried a couple of years after the divorce and have been for 35 years now but it took a long time to learn to not label my OH with the same tags as I'd placed on The Ex, yet it comes slowly but surelyI wish YOU nothing but good karma and a good relationship from now on, with yourself and whoever you allow into your life, anything must be better than trash,
Trash attracts trash.
till this day I’m still getting angry notifications on my comments on this thread so I’ve decided to stay away, advice sections don’t like anyone going against the grain here and that’s fine.
Quick reminder, no need for anyone to tell others what they can and can’t say or tell them to “set up another thread” when they tell their own story.
Users don’t get to decide how someone feels, just ignore comments/posts you don’t agree with and offer support when/if you see it necessary with others.
hope that’s ok.
At times yes - once I had fallen in love with him it was awful and hated the thought of it.Random question to all those who've been the other woman, no judgement just curious....does being the other woman not feel like being cheated on in itself? Like you're sleeping with him but he's also sleeping with someone else?
yes, and it nearly broke me. But then I realised, like someone else said, that even if he left her for me he would cheat still. I think I mentioned he’s now in a relationship with another woman he cheated on his wife with, and that seems to be all rosy but I deliberately keep a distance from home these days so who really knowsRandom question to all those who've been the other woman, no judgement just curious....does being the other woman not feel like being cheated on in itself? Like you're sleeping with him but he's also sleeping with someone else?
Yes 100% it’s a horrible situation. Being the other women is like taking drugs. You know it’s bad for you, you know it’s going to kill you but you can’t stop.Random question to all those who've been the other woman, no judgement just curious....does being the other woman not feel like being cheated on in itself? Like you're sleeping with him but he's also sleeping with someone else?
That’s so similar to how I feel I felt you’d written my reply!That would depend on what you wanted from the relationship. For me, nope, not at all, my focus was on other things, so it was just great sex with none of the drama. Also I didn't feel guilt at all. A person isn't a possession, they have freewill, if someone wants to cheat on their partner, that's entirely on them and as for female solidarity, nope don't get that either, soz#notsoz. All my closest friends have been Male (platonic, I never sleep with my male friends) I feel far more affinity with men than women.
Best way I’ve heard it describedYes and it broke me. You are right not all stories are clear cut
Yes 100% it’s a horrible situation. Being the other women is like taking drugs. You know it’s bad for you, you know it’s going to kill you but you can’t stop.
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