The Chateau Diaries #260 Stephanie Jarvis - the chatelaine of shoppin', clickbait, croc' tears & money

[Abuela]

I was also of the same mind when seeing the MMM for the first time and Olé telling everyone that his precious interior walls were all "hand painted" and in the comment section I wrote that yes, they were nice enough but that anyone could use a stencil - for which Olé blocked me. Now with Fanny waxing lyrical on the so called merits of the church restoration she and Tante visited, I thought it was some kind of joke. But no, we are apparently meant to believe that artisans, whose excellence is of such distinction that they were chosen to help with the restoration of Notre Dame, did the work on that church, and will be working on her chapel? Does Notre Dame do stencils? I don't believe Notre Dame would have accepted such shoddy work - plaster not smoothed over, crooked lines, the use of stencils ffs. The average crafter could do a better job - and I know 'cause I'm a pretty average crafter.

I think she is just setting up the delay excuse for the Chapel repair since Notre Dame is set to be finished by April 2024 as if the same artisans would be working for Lalande.

 

[HalcyonOrganic]

@Tea with lemon @HalcyonOrganic where are you?

Hmm?

 

[Marquis de Potpourri]

GAG CHARITIES!

July 2020:
British Heart Foundation UK (in memory of my father) €634
August 2020:
Alzheimer's Research UK (in memory of all of the residents of my parents' nursing homes) €650
September 2020:
Prostate Cancer Foundation (in memory of Selmar's father) €1,255
October 2020:
Medecins sans Frontieres (chosen by my mother to support vaccinations in Africa) €942 (equivalent to 426 cholera vaccinations)
November & December 2020 & Jan & Feb 2021:
A Lalande Fashion Scholarship for a student at the Villioti Fashion Institute in South Africa R100,000 (approx €5,800)
March 2021:
Suffolk Artlink £1,505
April 2021:
Association Petit Prince €1,689
May 2021:
Melanoma Focus €1,204
June 2021:
Aide aux Jeunes Diabétiques €1,735
July, August & September 2021:
The 2nd year of the Lalande Fashion Scholarship for a student at the Villioti Fashion Institute in South Africa R100,000 (approx €5,800)
October 2021:
A La Bonne Vauvre (our local Crozon sur Vauvre community centre) €3,184
November 2021:
Techo €2,709
December 2021:
Genesis Hope El-Roi Baby Home ZAR90,000 (€5,248.01)
If you'd like to see the video we made in the South African orphanage
January 2022:
We Are Here Venice €2,000
February 2022:
Red Cross for Ukraine €2,019
March 2022:
The Fred Hollows Foundation €2,311
April, May & June 2022:
Ardmore Community Fund €5893
July 2022:
Institut Curie €2.150
August 2022:
Movember €2.246
September, October & November 2022:
3rd year of the Lalande Fashion Scholarship for a student at the Villioti Fashion Institute in South Africa €6.092

Did they stop being charitable since November 2022?
I won't be surprised if the eight months' worth of GAG revenue will go to Phiphi Janssen's hair implant funds or perhaps a sex change operation.

 

[Lochness Monster]

Fanny has said three times already on GAG when I go to SA to see mummy…..
she even mentioned to Aunty we must go to the beach house when you come to SA to see Mummy.
Is Percy still alive?
Fanny is going on holiday not a two day visit to see Percy.

 

[Hedda Hopper]

CG has I all arranged……

Good grief! Michael Potts "has to travel the world for his photography". Geez, I wonder why I haven't seen any of his famous photographs in National Geographic or anywhere else for that matter. Oh, and I can't wait for the Bimbo, I mean Bamboo Room reveal.
---

Apologies for screen shot. Here the happy couple are at chateau love. CRW had captured several shots of them arm in arm . It’s just weird. Such an odd couple.

I do wonder if that dress came with boobs attached.

 

[ComtesseRose]

Oh, and I can't wait for the Bimbo, I mean Bamboo Room reveal.

Got a panda? We need a panda for... the reveal...

 

[MRShavershamsdress]

what gets me too is she never does the cheese course, most people go to France for the fabulous cheese and wine at Fanny's they get neither. I think that is because cheese would cost more per meal than the whole budget. That piece of cod was tiny. They never have a French meal the food is lousy
---

she could easily have got patreons on board with restoring the apartments so she could become more self sufficient and that money would increase the value of the dump. She has played it all wrong.

That’s because she only sees what’s right in front of her face! She has no capacity for forward thinking or long term strategy. She could’ve had years of increasing income from patrons and the heap if she’d done it right. Instead of $350,000 annually from Patreon, however much from YouTube, sponsorships, B&B and gites, she’s sacrificed everything for fast funds that she’s frittered away. I do not believe there is any money put back for any project…at all. We’ve all seen her spending, she’s living payout to payout. Between Princess Putrid and Little Lord Snorts-a-Lot the coffers have been drained faster than the Étang de Lalande!

 

[Lochness Monster]

Annalise just for fun please cut Snorts hair like this

 

[Fennelbug]

Perhaps Maria has low self esteem or she just doesn't have much gumption and ambition. It's the only reason I can think of to stay at The Dump for so long. She has no pressure in her job. There's no master chef watching over her. Fanny doesn't know or care about food service. As long as she stays within budget and turns out something she gets to stay. She can play the piano when she's not cooking, and she gets adoration from the idiots that stay there. Lots of oohs and aahs when she presents, but we don't hear them saying how delicious it is.
---

Mon dieu! They get croissants from the local bakery. That's enough French. I don't think the idiots that stay at The Dump want a French experience, they want to bask in the glory of the one and only savior of rural France! I would love it if one of the idiots would ask about the wine. It would be so much fun to see The Expert of All Things squirm in his too tight pants. Estate bottled? Blend? Region? Year? Variety of grape/s? Cru? "Let me check the box."

That food is garbage. That wine is trash.
---

Good grief! Michael Potts "has to travel the world for his photography". Geez, I wonder why I haven't seen any of his famous photographs in National Geographic or anywhere else for that matter. Oh, and I can't wait for the Bimbo, I mean Bamboo Room reveal.
---

I do wonder if that dress came with boobs attached.

The dress is so ill fitting- she really needs a stylist

 

[Luna20]

Hmm?

Your new job is too demanding! I need a daily dose of halcyon humor or as of late wise words!

 

[LittleMore Cottage]

Fanny " all the men in the Chateau wear broaches" OMG run Antoine Run and don't wear a broche to school, you will get your ass kicked... why oh why are they exploiting him again on the grab???? and where is his Mother?? packing all their
tit to leave forever?? How long has it been since they were there? the whole grab should be Antoine opening his gifts.... but no.... open some bracelets for you Mom now BACK to FANNY

 

[Just Grift Wood]

GAG CHARITIES!

July 2020:
British Heart Foundation UK (in memory of my father) €634
August 2020:
Alzheimer's Research UK (in memory of all of the residents of my parents' nursing homes) €650
September 2020:
Prostate Cancer Foundation (in memory of Selmar's father) €1,255
October 2020:
Medecins sans Frontieres (chosen by my mother to support vaccinations in Africa) €942 (equivalent to 426 cholera vaccinations)
November & December 2020 & Jan & Feb 2021:
A Lalande Fashion Scholarship for a student at the Villioti Fashion Institute in South Africa R100,000 (approx €5,800)
March 2021:
Suffolk Artlink £1,505
April 2021:
Association Petit Prince €1,689
May 2021:
Melanoma Focus €1,204
June 2021:
Aide aux Jeunes Diabétiques €1,735
July, August & September 2021:
The 2nd year of the Lalande Fashion Scholarship for a student at the Villioti Fashion Institute in South Africa R100,000 (approx €5,800)
October 2021:
A La Bonne Vauvre (our local Crozon sur Vauvre community centre) €3,184
November 2021:
Techo €2,709
December 2021:
Genesis Hope El-Roi Baby Home ZAR90,000 (€5,248.01)
If you'd like to see the video we made in the South African orphanage
January 2022:
We Are Here Venice €2,000
February 2022:
Red Cross for Ukraine €2,019
March 2022:
The Fred Hollows Foundation €2,311
April, May & June 2022:
Ardmore Community Fund €5893
July 2022:
Institut Curie €2.150
August 2022:
Movember €2.246
September, October & November 2022:
3rd year of the Lalande Fashion Scholarship for a student at the Villioti Fashion Institute in South Africa €6.092

Did they stop being charitable since November 2022?
I won't be surprised if the eight months' worth of GAG revenue will go to Phiphi Janssen's hair implant funds or perhaps a sex change operation.

Fanny's about as charitable as a dose of the clap

 

[ComtesseRose]

Fanny's about as charitable as a dose of the clap

Sharing is caring...

 

[Kickintheass]

Is that yet another new dress!!!!

 

[Lochness Monster]

Fanny's about as charitable as a dose of the clap

🪡Thread Nomination.
Fanny’s about as charitable as a dose of the clap.

 

[Hedda Hopper]

I guess the lemons from the last dress were made into lemonade for this dress. I do like Aunty, terrible taste, but she's a good sport. I'm a moody witch myself.
I must say Fanny is not looking too good now days. I haven't seen that dress before, it's ugly.
Priceless junk, and I do mean priceless as in pay nothing for it!

 

[Madame de Pompanddoodoo]

@Marquis de Potpourri Did they stop being charitable since November 2022?
I won't be surprised if the eight months' worth of GAG revenue will go to Phiphi Janssen's hair implant funds or perhaps a sex change operation.

I asked the question about donations in the comments on YT earlier this year. It got deleted and I was banned.

ETA I haven’t watched gift grab (never do) but I am of the opinion that Baghead and his family have no problems with the behaviour of feckless Fanny and they are not distancing themselves from the asylum. If they had any qualms they would not let Antoine continue to grab with the best of them.

 

[Iolair]

Same old, same old.

• All of Marie's bouquets look the same.
• All of Maria's food looks the same.
• All of Phi's tablescapes look the same.

And all are mundane and boring.
No personal or creative growth going on at all.

That's just it, isn't it! There seems to be no creative growth at all! There is nothing new, nothing innovative, and nothing one would be tempted to copy. If Snorty had a Pinterest page on his own tablescapes, I think the comments would be pretty damning. Were I to attend a chateau dinner, I'd expect clean white napery and let the food speak for itself - and this is presupposing that Snorts even knows what "naperie" is. Even if the dinner event was themed, I'd expect the room to be decorated, not necessarily the dinner table itself. Maria's food is repetition upon duplication. Imagine eating courgette every night. I suspect the lieLande library has a recipe book titled 1000 and One Ways to Cook Zucchini. As for Marieee, I'd introduce her to the world of ikebana just to watch her head explode. It'd be fun.

 

[C'est moi]

Is that yet another new dress!!!!

Almost certainly yes. It didn't look like she wanted to hand the pile for Marie baghead over to Antoine. Sitting there feeling through the fabric what was inside, of course she's already peeked, but it felt like initially she wasn't going to let them go.

 

[TorontoGWM]

Chatelaine with gay boyfriend
Unwraps gravy boat, has
Multiple orgasms and
Still needs to go shopping!