The advice thread for random problems

[Purrrrrrr]

Thanks, wasn't sure if they would be right or not, like am not sure if most would just tell me it must be a scam an to forget it, but honestly am getting more an more dissapointed, I seriously want to get out to the studios an paying for London will be expensive as it is without having to pay out for tickets

Have you tagged them on SM rather than just sending pm and emails? I find they are usually very fast to help if you tag them as other people can then see how you are being treated.

Cat owner problem!
we have a young cat who goes out durinf the day, she wakes up around 430 climbing over us….I let her out N get back in bed till 7 when I hear her at the front door. She has started to wake up early! Last night it was 215 she started! I ignored her for as long as possible (husband is a light sleeper so wasn’t impressed) she eventually settled down on me at 3! N woke up at 4! So let her out!
im hopin it’s just a phrase cos I don’t want her to be a night time outside cat!
any advice on how to cope with a early riser cat n how to stop worrying about her once she isoutside. She is my baby!
Sorry fir the essay! X

Trouble is once you give in to a cat that's it it wont give up. the only way is to not give in .. or to just let them come and go as they like. I try to keep them out of the bedroom as cats are nocturnal and will spend a lot of the night awake and waking you up (not so much in the winter but spring and summer are a nightmare) . if you don't let them in the bedroom they cant climb all over you.

My cats go out day and night. as the days get warmer and lighter they stay out longer and longer . they prefer to go out at night to the day.. both mine are now in and snuggled up and will be for most of the day come night they will be off.

 

[~vix~83~]

Have you tagged them on SM rather than just sending pm and emails? I find they are usually very fast to help if you tag them as other people can then see how you are being treated.




Trouble is once you give in to a cat that's it it wont give up. the only way is to not give in .. or to just let them come and go as they like. I try to keep them out of the bedroom as cats are nocturnal and will spend a lot of the night awake and waking you up (not so much in the winter but spring and summer are a nightmare) . if you don't let them in the bedroom they cant climb all over you.

My cats go out day and night. as the days get warmer and lighter they stay out longer and longer . they prefer to go out at night to the day.. both mine are now in and snuggled up and will be for most of the day come night they will be off.

Thank you. I’d happily ignore her but husband won’t put up with it. She wasn’t allowed in the room but she started to cry at night n scratch the door. She has her own bed in the bedroom n sleeps in there all night. She was up at 4 which is do able. It’s hard as we live in a 1bedroom flat so she less space inside. Once it gets lighter n warmer she will stay out longer and I’ll be outside.
she’s just a feral cat haha! Our last cat was a indoor cat who’d stay in our garden.

 

[Snippysnips]

Have you tagged them on SM rather than just sending pm and emails? I find they are usually very fast to help if you tag them as other people can then see how you are being treated.

I did tag them on twitter an that was how they sent me a company email to get in touch with them but it didn't last long before they stopped replying, I'll see if I have any replys tomorrow since I assume it's a Mon to Fri company

 

[Snippysnips]

Feel like am never off this but it's so handy

Has anyone used the imagination library? An is it worth it if your having to pay for it? It's not offered in my area so I'd imagine if am successful then I'd need to pay out the £25 a year for it, while I don't mind that am wondering if the books themselves are worth the costs or if I'd be as well just going to the shops, I'd be looking at the toddler range for books

 

[milkywaymelon]

Hope someone has had some experience with this. We had a company come out to install a pull down loft ladder and flooring in our attic. Their apprentice put their foot through our ceiling in the master bedroom.

They have said they will fix it. They told us they would have someone out yesterday and didn't, they didn't contact us at all. We
had to call multiple times, no one reached out to us. They also don't seem to be willing to work around us (we can't be there during the day to let them in without one of us having to take unpaid leave from work) they have told us we will likely have to wait until the weekend now.

What do we do in this situation? They have left the ceiling in an awful state and their follow up service has been woeful.

 

[Emiliabrazkow]

Feel like am never off this but it's so handy

Has anyone used the imagination library? An is it worth it if your having to pay for it? It's not offered in my area so I'd imagine if am successful then I'd need to pay out the £25 a year for it, while I don't mind that am wondering if the books themselves are worth the costs or if I'd be as well just going to the shops, I'd be looking at the toddler range for books

Hii, dont really know what imagination libary is butt i would get ylu are looking for books, as someone who is obssesed with reading , my town libary doesnt have that many books and my parents would never want to buy me really a new books, so i use Z libary, u bascially install app called Epub Reader and go to google and search Z libary and ylu dowland any book for free and it would show up in that app where you can read it.

So i just checked the website and its down for a moment, it does say tho that ist going to work again in few hours, and i never checked but i think they have children books

 

[Snippysnips]

Hii, dont really know what imagination libary is butt i would get ylu are looking for books, as someone who is obssesed with reading , my town libary doesnt have that many books and my parents would never want to buy me really a new books, so i use Z libary, u bascially install app called Epub Reader and go to google and search Z libary and ylu dowland any book for free and it would show up in that app where you can read it.

So i just checked the website and its down for a moment, it does say tho that ist going to work again in few hours, and i never checked but i think they have children books

Me neice is too young for apps, which is why I want books for her, she enjoys having them read to her as well as walking about the house with them plus I'd rather not encourage things like tablets/phones etc when she's so young, and I'd rather not take the risk of her accidentally damaging library books

Imagination library is children's books that get sent out monthly which are all designed for the age of your kid, I believe it is free books if the child is able to be enrolled in the program but if not then it's £25 a month

 

[If you say so...]

This is very trivial but I'd be interested to know what others would do in this situation:

Went to in-laws at Christmas and complimented their sodastream, I'd never seen anything like it and liked the idea of making my own carbonated drinks. I liked it so much that I went and bought one myself and they are not cheap!

Fast forward to last weekend and the in laws came to stay, bringing a present with them - a soda stream! I looked at my husband and he was acting thrilled like we didn't have one sitting in the kitchen so I followed his lead...

Now I don't know what to do! I would just give mine away but I paid a bit more for a nice looking one with glass bottles and the one they've bought us is quite basic looking with plastic bottles. I'm so grateful of the thought and would have loved it had i not already bought one Would you just suck it up and give away the nice one and replace with the one the in laws gave you?

 

[lurkingaround123]

This is very trivial but I'd be interested to know what others would do in this situation:

Went to in-laws at Christmas and complimented their sodastream, I'd never seen anything like it and liked the idea of making my own carbonated drinks. I liked it so much that I went and bought one myself and they are not cheap!

Fast forward to last weekend and the in laws came to stay, bringing a present with them - a soda stream! I looked at my husband and he was acting thrilled like we didn't have one sitting in the kitchen so I followed his lead...

Now I don't know what to do! I would just give mine away but I paid a bit more for a nice looking one with glass bottles and the one they've bought us is quite basic looking with plastic bottles. I'm so grateful of the thought and would have loved it had i not already bought one Would you just suck it up and give away the nice one and replace with the one the in laws gave you?

aahhh that’s so awkward that your husband did that haha. Have you got another space you could make use of one in? I have a soda stream at home but I work all week in the office so my sparkling water intake is unfortunately reduced. If I had a free spare I’d take it to work

are they likely to come around and say anything if you weren’t using theirs?

This is so ridiculous but.
I met a group of my partners mates and they were really rude to me. He was annoyed and said he’d say something but I told him to leave it because I met them at his flat for his severely delayed graduation and I didn’t want to make the night all about me. On that day one of the girls from their group gave him a picture she’d drawn in a frame as a gift (???) it’s proper rit like a kids done it and I really don’t get it but fair enough different people different lives. It’s on the windowsill at his flat, every time I walk in his flat it instantly reminds me of that night, how rude they all were and it puts me in an irritated mood. I can see it out of the corner of my eye when we watch tv so I’m sitting side on to avoid seeing the stupid picture. I literally want to find her and throw it at her head. I can’t exactly say anything without sounding like a psycho can I but it really irritates me. Just needed to share anonymously

 

[If you say so...]

aahhh that’s so awkward that your husband did that haha. Have you got another space you could make use of one in? I have a soda stream at home but I work all week in the office so my sparkling water intake is unfortunately reduced. If I had a free spare I’d take it to work

are they likely to come around and say anything if you weren’t using theirs?

This is so ridiculous but.
I met a group of my partners mates and they were really rude to me. He was annoyed and said he’d say something but I told him to leave it because I met them at his flat for his severely delayed graduation and I didn’t want to make the night all about me. On that day one of the girls from their group gave him a picture she’d drawn in a frame as a gift (???) it’s proper rit like a kids done it and I really don’t get it but fair enough different people different lives. It’s on the windowsill at his flat, every time I walk in his flat it instantly reminds me of that night, how rude they all were and it puts me in an irritated mood. I can see it out of the corner of my eye when we watch tv so I’m sitting side on to avoid seeing the stupid picture. I literally want to find her and throw it at her head. I can’t exactly say anything without sounding like a psycho can I but it really irritates me. Just needed to share anonymously

Tell me about it Yeah actually I think it would be useful in the canteen at work. Thank you!

and about the picture, do you live together? I'd probably just tell him it annoys you because of that night, it's so much easier to be honest than sit on it and let it wind you up!

 

[Choco88]

This is very trivial but I'd be interested to know what others would do in this situation:

Went to in-laws at Christmas and complimented their sodastream, I'd never seen anything like it and liked the idea of making my own carbonated drinks. I liked it so much that I went and bought one myself and they are not cheap!

Fast forward to last weekend and the in laws came to stay, bringing a present with them - a soda stream! I looked at my husband and he was acting thrilled like we didn't have one sitting in the kitchen so I followed his lead...

Now I don't know what to do! I would just give mine away but I paid a bit more for a nice looking one with glass bottles and the one they've bought us is quite basic looking with plastic bottles. I'm so grateful of the thought and would have loved it had i not already bought one Would you just suck it up and give away the nice one and replace with the one the in laws gave you?

I definitely wouldn’t get rid of your nice one with the glass bottles. I’d sell/regift the one from the in-laws.

 

[damy]

hi guys im new to the thread and would be greatful for any help.

i have social anxiety and have already not attended two presentaion sort of thing and they were part of module assesment but only a small percentage.

i Have debate sort of thing tommorow, give a presentation then debate and im lowkey worried. I cant miss it as its worth a quarter of module grade, my biggest porbelms are my voice breaking when talking and after every presentaion ive done in school college the teachers always tell me to talk louder even though i do try it never works. how can i improve or try to talk louder for tommorow.

 

[justheretoread99]

This is very trivial but I'd be interested to know what others would do in this situation:

Went to in-laws at Christmas and complimented their sodastream, I'd never seen anything like it and liked the idea of making my own carbonated drinks. I liked it so much that I went and bought one myself and they are not cheap!

Fast forward to last weekend and the in laws came to stay, bringing a present with them - a soda stream! I looked at my husband and he was acting thrilled like we didn't have one sitting in the kitchen so I followed his lead...

Now I don't know what to do! I would just give mine away but I paid a bit more for a nice looking one with glass bottles and the one they've bought us is quite basic looking with plastic bottles. I'm so grateful of the thought and would have loved it had i not already bought one Would you just suck it up and give away the nice one and replace with the one the in laws gave you?

If it was me, I’d sell the one your in-laws gifted you, and then use the money to buy them a gift back. (Something for Christmas, Birthdays .. etc). And not tell them, and hope they never notice that the one in your kitchen is not the one they bought.

 

[Snippysnips]

hi guys im new to the thread and would be greatful for any help.

i have social anxiety and have already not attended two presentaion sort of thing and they were part of module assesment but only a small percentage.

i Have debate sort of thing tommorow, give a presentation then debate and im lowkey worried. I cant miss it as its worth a quarter of module grade, my biggest porbelms are my voice breaking when talking and after every presentaion ive done in school college the teachers always tell me to talk louder even though i do try it never works. how can i improve or try to talk louder for tommorow.

Are you in the UK? If so have you tried rescue remedy? I suffer anxiety as well an can stress out alot which causes me to try an withdraw an be quiet, you can get it as a spray or gummies

When you are relaxed you are not as conscious about talking as when your stressing about every one

I'd take water as well, drinking an eating can break the fight or flight mode as when you eat or drink that tells the brain that you are in no danger since naturally you wouldn't be eating or drinking if you were in danger (comes from our ancestors who would need to fight to survive) I use that as well whenever I start to feel the stress coming on, take a drink an it breaks that fight or flight panic we go into, so I'd recommend taking a bottle of water an whenever you feel that little panic come on then take a drink, also as a ex performer the biggest advice I can tell you about speech is what we all used to get told "pretend old grandma is sitting in the back an forgot her hearing aid again" lol its stupid but it helped us project our voices

 

[justheretoread99]

hi guys im new to the thread and would be greatful for any help.

i have social anxiety and have already not attended two presentaion sort of thing and they were part of module assesment but only a small percentage.

i Have debate sort of thing tommorow, give a presentation then debate and im lowkey worried. I cant miss it as its worth a quarter of module grade, my biggest porbelms are my voice breaking when talking and after every presentaion ive done in school college the teachers always tell me to talk louder even though i do try it never works. how can i improve or try to talk louder for tommorow.

Is this for school/college/uni? Or a work setting? Xx

 

[damy]

Is this for school/college/uni? Or a work setting? Xx

for uni

Are you in the UK? If so have you tried rescue remedy? I suffer anxiety as well an can stress out alot which causes me to try an withdraw an be quiet, you can get it as a spray or gummies

When you are relaxed you are not as conscious about talking as when your stressing about every one

I'd take water as well, drinking an eating can break the fight or flight mode as when you eat or drink that tells the brain that you are in no danger since naturally you wouldn't be eating or drinking if you were in danger (comes from our ancestors who would need to fight to survive) I use that as well whenever I start to feel the stress coming on, take a drink an it breaks that fight or flight panic we go into, so I'd recommend taking a bottle of water an whenever you feel that little panic come on then take a drink, also as a ex performer the biggest advice I can tell you about speech is what we all used to get told "pretend old grandma is sitting in the back an forgot her hearing aid again" lol its stupid but it helped us project our voices

yh in the uk. ive heard of rescue remedy but havent tried it. thank you for your advice i barely drink water will try and let you know. ive never heard of that saying but i actually think itd be useful, than you

Are you in the UK? If so have you tried rescue remedy? I suffer anxiety as well an can stress out alot which causes me to try an withdraw an be quiet, you can get it as a spray or gummies

When you are relaxed you are not as conscious about talking as when your stressing about every one

I'd take water as well, drinking an eating can break the fight or flight mode as when you eat or drink that tells the brain that you are in no danger since naturally you wouldn't be eating or drinking if you were in danger (comes from our ancestors who would need to fight to survive) I use that as well whenever I start to feel the stress coming on, take a drink an it breaks that fight or flight panic we go into, so I'd recommend taking a bottle of water an whenever you feel that little panic come on then take a drink, also as a ex performer the biggest advice I can tell you about speech is what we all used to get told "pretend old grandma is sitting in the back an forgot her hearing aid again" lol its stupid but it helped us project our voices

yh in the uk. ive heard of rescue remedy but havent tried it. thank you for your advice i barely drink water will try and let you know. ive never heard of that saying but i actually think itd be useful, than you

 

[justheretoread99]

for uni

Are you tutors or course leaders aware of your anxieties?

When I was at uni we had a “Student Support Services” where if we were struggling with anything or had any disabilities, mental health conditions etc, appropriate arrangements were put in place.

E.g. if a student with anxiety had to do a presentation, they could do it infront of a smaller group, and had a few minutes extra onto their time limit.

If you haven’t already, please speak to any student support services, your personal tutor or any tutor/course instructor you feel comfortable around and make them aware of your anxieties.

I’ve done a presentation at uni infront of 300 people on my course at I was honestly bricking it. I felt like running out the back doors.

But, please know you won’t be the only one feeling like this.

Eat a few hours before and make sure you go to the toilet before it’s your turn. Sounds daft I know, but not needing to go to the toilet will be one less thing to worry about.

Take some notes with you. (If you’re allowed). Take deep breaths, speak slowly. And if you’re concerned about the volume of your voice ask if there’s a microphone you can use. Focusing on 1 spot of a wall really helps me. If I make eye contact with someone then I’m more likely to get nervous and jumble my words.

Good luck, you will feel loads better once it’s over with.

 

[Sheabutter]

I popped way too much popcorn. I have no idea what to put on it. It’s so plain and reminds me of packing peanuts.

 

[BettyCrockerr]

This is very trivial but I'd be interested to know what others would do in this situation:

Went to in-laws at Christmas and complimented their sodastream, I'd never seen anything like it and liked the idea of making my own carbonated drinks. I liked it so much that I went and bought one myself and they are not cheap!

Fast forward to last weekend and the in laws came to stay, bringing a present with them - a soda stream! I looked at my husband and he was acting thrilled like we didn't have one sitting in the kitchen so I followed his lead...

Now I don't know what to do! I would just give mine away but I paid a bit more for a nice looking one with glass bottles and the one they've bought us is quite basic looking with plastic bottles. I'm so grateful of the thought and would have loved it had i not already bought one Would you just suck it up and give away the nice one and replace with the one the in laws gave you?

Why did you both lie to start with? When they turned up with one, why didn’t you just explain that you’d bought one after enjoying it so much at theirs? Then they could have taken it back and got their money back and no one would be out of pocket and you wouldn’t now be caught in this ridiculous lie!


Give them it back and explain you’d already bought one.

 

[If you say so...]

Why did you both lie to start with? When they turned up with one, why didn’t you just explain that you’d bought one after enjoying it so much at theirs? Then they could have taken it back and got their money back and no one would be out of pocket and you wouldn’t now be caught in this ridiculous lie!


Give them it back and explain you’d already bought one.

I didn’t know you could return things after 3 months, thanks so much for your super helpful and kind reply!