Social services advice

[Clairer86]

From what I was told they had received three reports over 6 weeks about the house and garden and called her I'm assuming on Sunday just gone telling her that and that she needs to call back to self refer. However my friend the father of said children called them on Monday and was told no reports had been made and that if they had nothing would be disclosed due to confidentiality which I took to mean they wouldn't say what's been said as they said no reports have been made. I'm getting the info third hand as obviously she told him and he's telling me.

Tbh im not surprised you are confused. Not only is 3rd hand info open to discrepancies, add into that not really knowing about social services, and most people would be confused with the information you received from your friend.

I think the first thing to say is try not to worry if Social services do become involved. Regardless of what the Daily Mail will try and make you believe, we are not sociopaths who enjoy ripping families apart, and we certainly dont get cash bonuses every time we remove a blonde hair blue eyed child! And we can be a really good source of support and guidance. We always try and keep families together and we cant just remove children for no reason (by the time a family goes to court, its when we have been involved for a very long time and no sustained changes have been made, and it really is the last resort). There is also no shame in having a social worker, its just a shame that so much scaremongering is out there when it comes to social services. Social workers, we are not naive neither are we posh or even middle class tbh (most of us) and so we dont expect things to be 'perfect' as that is not realistic. There is a huge difference between a bit of mess and really bad living conditions. As long as your friend is open and honest then that will help the social worker offer her and the children the correct level of support/intervention.

It could be that your friend may have a family support worker, that would possibly be under early help, and that wouldnt normally be led by a social worker. but rather a family support worker. This is totally voluntary and your friend is well within her rights to decline the help and support offered to her. If a social worker has concerns-if a referral has come in then a social worker will be assigned to undertake a CAF assessment. The outcome of that assessment will be either no further action, advice to start an early help plan, or Social work involvement of either Child in Need or Child Protection. Being on a child in need plan is support based and also completely voluntary (not many people are aware of that). If there are safeugarding concerns then an assessment known as Section 47 enquiries will be done, and then a Initial Child Protection Conference will take place and the outcome of that might be to place the children on Child Protection plans. That isnt voluntary, and the family have to work with the social worker in that case.

 

[lasttime]

Tbh im not surprised you are confused. Not only is 3rd hand info open to discrepancies, add into that not really knowing about social services, and most people would be confused with the information you received from your friend.

I think the first thing to say is try not to worry if Social services do become involved. Regardless of what the Daily Mail will try and make you believe, we are not sociopaths who enjoy ripping families apart, and we certainly dont get cash bonuses every time we remove a blonde hair blue eyed child! And we can be a really good source of support and guidance. We always try and keep families together and we cant just remove children for no reason (by the time a family goes to court, its when we have been involved for a very long time and no sustained changes have been made, and it really is the last resort). There is also no shame in having a social worker, its just a shame that so much scaremongering is out there when it comes to social services. Social workers, we are not naive neither are we posh or even middle class tbh (most of us) and so we dont expect things to be 'perfect' as that is not realistic. There is a huge difference between a bit of mess and really bad living conditions. As long as your friend is open and honest then that will help the social worker offer her and the children the correct level of support/intervention.

It could be that your friend may have a family support worker, that would possibly be under early help, and that wouldnt normally be led by a social worker. but rather a family support worker. This is totally voluntary and your friend is well within her rights to decline the help and support offered to her. If a social worker has concerns-if a referral has come in then a social worker will be assigned to undertake a CAF assessment. The outcome of that assessment will be either no further action, advice to start an early help plan, or Social work involvement of either Child in Need or Child Protection. Being on a child in need plan is support based and also completely voluntary (not many people are aware of that). If there are safeugarding concerns then an assessment known as Section 47 enquiries will be done, and then a Initial Child Protection Conference will take place and the outcome of that might be to place the children on Child Protection plans. That isnt voluntary, and the family have to work with the social worker in that case.

Thank you for that information. I've had some involvement with social services before (not for me but an ex) so was kind of aware on how things started which is also why the alleged call to my friends ex confused me so much, I'd never heard of them calling to say reports have been made and that a self referral needs to be done. However I'll pass what you've said on so he has some peace of mind because I know he was really worried about them being taken into care as he can't have them full time with his current situation.
Also I want to just take a moment to say I really respect what you do and that people in your profession definitely deserve more credit than they get.

 

[Ghostpumpkin]

I'm hoping someone on here can help. A friend of mine has kids with someone he's no longer with and allegedly there's been reports made to social services about the kids and house. Allegedly she told him that they called and told her and also told her she has to call tomorrow to make a self referral. I kind of believe the reports have been made but I'm also questioning it and didn't think that's how they'd proceed if reports have been made. Can someone clarify? I've tried googling. I really need help on how he should proceed as none of us want the kids in care and he's in no position to take them full time but is understandably concerned. Thank you.

I work in a team closely linked with social services, we act on referrals of poor housing conditions, sometimes with children there. If there is a concern about the state of a property there are lots of services available to support the family which they would sign post them to before taking any action.

 

[lasttime]

I'm back again, thought I'd revive this thread rather than start a new one.
Social services did end up involved albeit some time after I started this thread. The children where put on a child protection plan and it is all still ongoing.
My friend has been attending meetings and although there is no concerns over his parenting he has had to miss one of the 12 week meetings and is due to miss another both have been missed because he is at work. He gives them plenty of notice that he can't attend ie the day he receives the date however he is worried he will get backlash from ss for not attending, he can't not work and can't use his phone at work which is what the father of the other children does. Should he be concerned or will they understand?

 

[LennyBriscoe]

I'm back again, thought I'd revive this thread rather than start a new one.
Social services did end up involved albeit some time after I started this thread. The children where put on a child protection plan and it is all still ongoing.
My friend has been attending meetings and although there is no concerns over his parenting he has had to miss one of the 12 week meetings and is due to miss another both have been missed because he is at work. He gives them plenty of notice that he can't attend ie the day he receives the date however he is worried he will get backlash from ss for not attending, he can't not work and can't use his phone at work which is what the father of the other children does. Should he be concerned or will they understand?

I appreciate he might not want work to know about something so personal, but could he approach his boss for a “to whom it may concern letter” confirming the days he was at work?

 

[lasttime]

I appreciate he might not want work to know about something so personal, but could he approach his boss for a “to whom it may concern letter” confirming the days he was at work?

I imagine he could, ss have his rota and if the next meeting hadn't been rescheduled he'd of been able to make it. I think he's worried because the other dad does attend whilst he's working but he is self employed whereas my friend works for a company and drives for a living. I think he's worried that they'll be a bit 'well he attends and he's working so why can't you'

 

[LennyBriscoe]

I imagine he could, ss have his rota and if the next meeting hadn't been rescheduled he'd of been able to make it. I think he's worried because the other dad does attend whilst he's working but he is self employed whereas my friend works for a company and drives for a living. I think he's worried that they'll be a bit 'well he attends and he's working so why can't you'

You would hope they would be able to see the differences, him working can only be a good thing surely? Does he feel like he could be honest with his boss about what’s happening? Maybe then they could arrange it so he gets a different shift when the meeting comes up. I appreciate it’s tricky because of the nature of it, it would just be a shame if this became a problem because it’s stressful, not knowing if something is going to become an issue.

 

[lasttime]

You would hope they would be able to see the differences, him working can only be a good thing surely? Does he feel like he could be honest with his boss about what’s happening? Maybe then they could arrange it so he gets a different shift when the meeting comes up. I appreciate it’s tricky because of the nature of it, it would just be a shame if this became a problem because it’s stressful, not knowing if something is going to become an issue.

Unfortunately the only way he'd be able to guarantee he's off for it would be to book holiday days which aren't guaranteed and understandbly he doesnt want to use all of his holiday on appointments, he already used a lot for previous meetings. The company he works for have a rolling 12 week rolling rota and ss are aware of this. The company also expect all appointments etc to be made for rest days so I don't think they'd be accommodating. They'd likely provide proof he was working but that's the best he'd get. Frustrating when it isn't his parenting in question but obviously his concern is that he will come under fire for not being able to attend which is a valid concern.

 

[Lizzie Mintdrop]

I don't think using his leave is wasting them, it's his only option

 

[Clairer86]

I'm back again, thought I'd revive this thread rather than start a new one.
Social services did end up involved albeit some time after I started this thread. The children where put on a child protection plan and it is all still ongoing.
My friend has been attending meetings and although there is no concerns over his parenting he has had to miss one of the 12 week meetings and is due to miss another both have been missed because he is at work. He gives them plenty of notice that he can't attend ie the day he receives the date however he is worried he will get backlash from ss for not attending, he can't not work and can't use his phone at work which is what the father of the other children does. Should he be concerned or will they understand?

So that is a bit crappy by the social worker; i mean i always try and work with the parent especially when they work. However, it would absolutely be in his best interest to prioritise the reviews (i presume the meeting is a Review Conference and not a core group meeting?). I cant lie, it doesnt look good if a parent does not attend those, even though he does work and the social worker should be mindful of that. I would get him to ask the sw if they can have a word with the IRO who chairs the reviews and explain to them the situation.

 

[lasttime]

So that is a bit crappy by the social worker; i mean i always try and work with the parent especially when they work. However, it would absolutely be in his best interest to prioritise the reviews (i presume the meeting is a Review Conference and not a core group meeting?). I cant lie, it doesnt look good if a parent does not attend those, even though he does work and the social worker should be mindful of that. I would get him to ask the sw if they can have a word with the IRO who chairs the reviews and explain to them the situation.

It is the core group meetings not the review conference. I think he would take holiday for the review conference but he'd rather not use the little holiday he gets to make it so he can attend every meeting. He's already used a lot of holiday to attend previous core groups and the last review.