I was thinking that. It's probably not sufficiently juvenile for her.
Ruby Granger #36 Pumpkin Bread Activity
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The head bobbing, the gurning facial expressions and waggling her eyebrows during her 'speech' 
Room looked pretty empty. She was getting herself more and more excited as she spoke.. Her dramatic readings are the worst. I was worried we were going to have a Night Before Christmas moment all over again. 'Snyow Blyow'. If you know, you know.
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Room looked pretty empty. She was getting herself more and more excited as she spoke.. Her dramatic readings are the worst. I was worried we were going to have a Night Before Christmas moment all over again. 'Snyow Blyow'. If you know, you know.
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Her hair is something that she seems very cautious about changing. Its like she is using it to hold on to childhood. She's probably had some of that hair since she was twalveI know we say this several times a day, but her hair is just tragic. It’s way too long, starts way too high on her head, and it’s just so dull and frayed and like a louse would think it prime real estate. Shouldn’t pick on someone’s appearance, I know, but when social media is how you make your money and appearance-related posts are a regular part of your content, it would be well worth the investment to have it cut and styled. Even 12-year-olds are getting haircuts these days, Roobs. I promise you it won’t ruin yourcarefully crafted image
Is it just me? What in the contortionist fuckery does Eri-mental have for hands if she touch her cheeks with the back of her hand, yet her fingers burn against them?!
Definitely not me sat here trying to emulate it - I must look like a mole coming up for sunlight
This is one of the things I love most about her terrible writing. The descriptions of people's physical movements and actions are completely bleeping bonkers.Is it just me? What in the contortionist fuckery does Eri-mental have for hands if she touch her cheeks with the back of her hand, yet her fingers burn against them?!
Definitely not me sat here trying to emulate it - I must look like a mole coming up for sunlight
In the Lottie Parton passages she showed, Lottie could see through wooden desks, was facing the front of a classroom and could magically see the back of a student's head even though they were sat behind her and could somehow casually drum all her fingertips up and down her spine without dislocating her shoulders or alerting her teachers to the fact that she's from another planet.
She seems to have no clue how basic anatomy works and characters can apparently contort their limbs like pretzels, extend them at will or just detach them entirely. They can see in all directions at once like they've mastered astral projection. They all seem to be compulsively tapping their "finger pads" on everything in every scene. Their skin is usually a bubbling nightmare of ticks, twitches and wildly fluctuating temperature extremes. Whole book full of bleeping aliens.
Chapter 14 of Erimentha Parker: (We are now halfway through the book guys!!!!)
Sorry it is a short one, unlike Ruby I do actually have a full time masters degree/job so cannot spend my entire life reading books
Plot -
- Ruby is acting out Much Ado About Nothing in her bedroom and gives her mum a one woman show
- Her mum tells her that they will be going to Kimberly's BBQ after church tomorrow and not to get spruced up because it is very casual
- Ruby picks her outfits for tomorrow. A "pretty green" pleated skirt, white peter-pan collared shirt and an olive-green button down cardigan. As well as a white linin dress and lilac cardigan for church.
- In the morning, Ruby decides to teach herself Morse Code before breakfast. She also irons her bed covers
Quotes -
- "I pelt out Beatrice's lines with bravado, already having warmed to the witty heroine"
- "I nod absent-mindedly, my anxiety spreading like party streamers"
- "I borrow the travel iron from the utility room to smooth down the sheets and they are soon as flat as skimming stones" (At least in this universe Ruby makes her bed)
- "Mum does so much for me and I ca see that I realise I'm being really rather selfish" (I think this is the first time in the book that Erimentha has shown any maturity or character growth)
- "My friendship problems with Kimberley shouldn't stop [mum] from having a jolly good time today"
Sorry it is a short one, unlike Ruby I do actually have a full time masters degree/job so cannot spend my entire life reading books
Plot -
- Ruby is acting out Much Ado About Nothing in her bedroom and gives her mum a one woman show
- Her mum tells her that they will be going to Kimberly's BBQ after church tomorrow and not to get spruced up because it is very casual
- Ruby picks her outfits for tomorrow. A "pretty green" pleated skirt, white peter-pan collared shirt and an olive-green button down cardigan. As well as a white linin dress and lilac cardigan for church.
- In the morning, Ruby decides to teach herself Morse Code before breakfast. She also irons her bed covers
Quotes -
- "I pelt out Beatrice's lines with bravado, already having warmed to the witty heroine"
- "I nod absent-mindedly, my anxiety spreading like party streamers"
- "I borrow the travel iron from the utility room to smooth down the sheets and they are soon as flat as skimming stones" (At least in this universe Ruby makes her bed)
- "Mum does so much for me and I ca see that I realise I'm being really rather selfish" (I think this is the first time in the book that Erimentha has shown any maturity or character growth)
- "My friendship problems with Kimberley shouldn't stop [mum] from having a jolly good time today"
Aaaaaaand this is how we know it really is a work of fiction.
so the book is science fiction/fantasy.
I'm soo glad that her writing is so bad, because it gives me confidence! I have a "problem" with writing descriptions of people, of their surroundings etc. So I just write basic things .
This is what a casual outfit is in her mind because jeans are for peasants
now that that’s been said, i’ve never seen her wear jeans. is there a pic or a video where she has?
She's claimed multiple times she NAVVER wears jeans, yet she owns multiple pairs (white, black and blue) and you don't have to scroll super far back in her insta to see her wearing them.
Her IG story. omg You haven't got Wes Anderson down, woman. You are just perpetually freaky and seeing someone approaching their mid 20's and still play-acting while wanting to go for their Masters at Oxford is just cringe. Did she just discover Moonrise Kingdom or something? Because I am not picking up those vibes. She is so stiff and lacks talent in everything. It is hilarious the way she tries to put her foot in every category (study, books, fashion, education, acting, ballet, gymnastics, etc.) and comes up empty. Everything about her is so tragic.
Not even that. Someone said an outfit she was wearing looked very Wes Anderson, then she went "OOH, OOH, OOH! SOMETHING ALSE OIY CAN APPRYOPRIATE AND ADD TYOO MOIY FAKE OIDANTITY!"
She's never watched anything by Wes Anderson, she just searched Wes Anderson on TikTok and ripped off the content she found.
For a book called The Awakening, there was less waking up and morning routines in it than she expected.
She was also very disappointed that a book by Chopin didn't feature more pianos.
Having your long hair hang down while operating machinery is a great idea...
This made me laugh too much. Trying to hard not to offend her over the fact she’s extremely irritating
I actually kind of enjoyed the new video. Something a little different, and at the end when she was interacting with Mummy Granger, she actually seemed a lot more likeable and natural. I’m sure someone will come and shoot down my little balloon of optimism, but I feel like this is a step in the right direction - doing normal, real things (although I’m pretty sure Daddy Bones did a lot of the work behind the scenes lol), not playing Victorian infant make-believe in their crack den of a garden.
I really thought the next video would be an Oxford Masters announcement 
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